Lyra Screws Up Big Time

“I’m having a melt down!” Lyra exclaimed. She and Bon Bon were now in her new office, which was previously Creech’s. Lyra set a framed picture of a strange figure with arms and legs behind her desk.

Bon Bon threw her hooves in the air. “You should be having a meltdown!”

“Well, I am!”

“Good!”

“Oh, Bon Bon.” Lyra whimpered. Bon Bon’s expression grew softer. She didn't want her friend crying again.

“All right, relax,” she said gently. Then she smiled. “I’m still proud of you though.”

Lyra blinked in surprise. “You are?”

Bon Bon nodded. “Under normal circumstances, this would be a great thing for both of us.” She said.

Lyra nodded and looked around the office. “Mostly for me.”  Sally suddenly appeared from outside of the office, staring intently at her, trying to look inconspicuous. “Sally’s on the move,” Lyra said in a low voice. Bon Bon looked towards the door and saw Sally as well. “We need to find that killer now.”  The unicorn whispered as Sally moved away.

Bon Bon looked out one of the windows to see Flinch, who had played the guitar earlier, muttering to himself. Intently. “Lyra,” she whispered. “Follow me.”

The two friends sneaked up behind the cubicle where Flinch was sitting. Both peered their heads slightly above it to see what Flinch was up to. “Stupid Heartstrings, and her stupid, perfect beautiful face,” he muttered. “Her beautiful minty skin. “ Lyra and Bon Bon looked at each other with wide eyes. “Teeth that look like they came from Atlantis,” Flinch continued. “How does somepony even eat to look like that?” The girls sunk down to the floor behind the cubicle. Lyra was blushing.

“Flinch may be our murderer.” Bon Bon whispered. “I also think he’s in love with you.”

Lyra’s blushing intensified. “He’s not in love with me, Bon Bon.” She muttered. The two mares suddenly noticed that it was quiet. They peeked over the cubicle once more. Flinch was leaving, looking very, very angry.

At the Ponyville police station, Carrot Top and Lassiter were talking about the case. “This is good,” Lassiter said as they walked through the station. “These prints are gonna give us our killer, tie this case up in a neat little murder bow.”

Carrot smiled warily. “Uh, yeah, you know, it’s just so satisfying matching prints to murderers-ooh!” she stopped and put a hoof to her head.

Lassiter’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion and concern. “What the hay? Are you okay?” he asked his partner.

“No..” Carrot Top moaned. “No, you know, I’m… I’m feeling nauseous… and crampy and, uh…”

Lassiter swallowed, looking pale. “Lady doctor?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh dear God. Top?”

“Mmm-hmm?”

“You can tell me.” Lassiter looked like he was about to puke. “Are you carrying Woody’s unborn demon seed?” Carrot Top would’ve laughed, but then she realized it would have to do for now. She raised her eyebrows, and looked at her partner knowingly. Lassiter’s face twisted in anguish. “Oh, crap!”

“Heartstrings and her perfect slim physique,” Flinch muttered in the parking lot, pacing back and forth. “That’s what got her the job!” Lyra and Bon Bon hid behind a car, listening in on everything. “Makes sense,” Flinch said, tilting his head, as if reasoning with himself. “I would… I would give her the job. I mean, she’s gorgeous! And smart!” He paused. “But she can get any job! Why does she want my job?” He started pacing a little faster. “It’s because she’s got pretty eyes,” he grunted. “Perfect teeth and a perfect smile.”

Lyra’s face was flushed with surprise and embarrassment. “Man,” she whispered. “Flinch is in love with me!”

Bon Bon shook her head. “Nope. I’m not gonna let you date a smoker.” She said evenly.

Lyra whacked her on the shoulder. “I’m not gonna date him, Bon Bon.” She hissed.

Suddenly, Bon Bon's phone vibrated. Bon Bon quickly answered it as they sat down behind the car that hid them from view. “Hey, Carrot.” Bon Bon whispered. “…Okay…That’s not great….” Bon Bon then looked confused. “…Weird…super weird…okay, bye.” She hung up the phone. “We’re out of time,” she whispered earnestly. “Lassie is about to have the print results. Carrot is trying to stall him by pretending to be carrying Starfish Hooves.”

Lyra raised an eyebrow. “Starfish who?”

Bon Bon pursed her lips together. “Apparently, Woody’s first born. Derpy’s cousin.  Of course, I’ll get to name him after one of my favorite sea ponies.”

Lyra nodded with a slight grin on her face. “Oh! I like it. I like it a lot.”

The duo then poked their heads over the car again, but flinch was nowhere to be found. Bon Bon sprang up. “Man, your coltfriend is gone!” she whined.

Lyra immediately stood up. “He’s not my coltfreind, Bon Bon!” Together, they galloped through the parking lot, looking for any sign of Flinch.

“Where’d he go?” Bon Bon panted. They ran outside where there were more cars.

“I don’t wanna run anymore!” Lyra gasped.

“Hello, ladies!”

The two girls tuned to see Sally walking over to them with a huge trash bag on his back, which happened to be the one that Lyra and Bon Bon tried to get rid of. “Sorry to bother you.” The two mares groaned inwardly. This was not what they needed right now.

“Uh… Hey, Sally,” Lyra said slowly. “What’s happening?” Sally Held up a yellow file with his magic and gestured towards the bag on his back.

“Look what I found,” he said with a smile.

Bon Bon chuckled nervously. “How… How’d you find that?” she asked tremulously.

“I did a hypothetical evidence disposal route based on the criminal profile I’d established for the perpetrators of the crime,” Sally replied, setting down the bag at his feet. “Which led me to Hoofingdales… where I bought these shoes.” He lifted his front hoof to reveal one of his polished black shoes.

“They do look spiffy.” Bon Bon admitted.

Sally went on. “Then, I went to the dumpster behind Juan’s Mexican Café, ring a bell?” The two mares sighed in defeat.

After buying some Mexican food, Bon Bon tossed the bag of trash into the dumpster while Lyra munched on a taco.

Earlier that morning, Sally’s head rose up from the dumpster, holding the bag of trash in his hoof. He smiled victoriously.

“I also have this,” Sally added, holding up the yellow folder. “Guess who wrote the note that was clenched in Mr. Creech’s dead hoof?”

Lyra’s lip trembled. It was over. They had failed. The gig was up.

“Okay!” she cried. “Okay, Sally, you got me, all right? You got me!” Bon Bon sighed and gently placed a hoof over her friend’s shoulder. “You know who wrote the note to Creech?” Lyra almost yelled. “Me! It was me! But you know what? I did not kill him!”

Sally seemed unfazed. “Miss Heartstrings, I know two things to be true.” He said. “One, Teddy Flinch is in love with you.”

Bon Bon smirked.

“Told you.”

“Suck it, Bon Bon.”

Sally smiled. “Two, you did not kill Mr. Creech.” Lyra stared at him for a moment. Then the relief started pouring into her like a waterfall.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

Bon Bon grinned widely. “You crafty stallion, you,” she purred. “You know exactly who killed Creech, don’t you?” Sally nodded. “Well go ahead,” Bon Bon said good naturedly, leaning forward. “Tell us who it is.” Lyra stared at him expectantly.

Sally suddenly dropped the yellow folder, and he started foaming at the mouth. Bon Bon’s eyebrows shot up. “Sally?” Sally fell forward, and hit the ground with a thud. Both mares gasped, and leaned over his body. “Sally?!”