Your lot in Life, or Spike’s Monster Mash

Chapter Two.

Spike quickly made his way to the entrance of the castle as he tried his best to block out the tirade of mental images that Twilight had just bombarded on his mind. He thought of old nuns, manticores, sewage, long necked hydras, timber wolves, thorny vines wrapping around his thigh as they made their way to-

“NO! NO. EN- OH. Bad brain! Bad!” Spike chastised himself as he made his way to the entrance, where as expected, Trixie was waiting for him. She was standing tall and proud as ever, even though she was a full head shorter than Spike now. As he approached her, she put on her signature show mare grin as she snapped her fingers, and in a puff of smoke, her hat appeared on her head.

“So,” Trixie began with an air of grandeur, “you finally managed to pull yourself away from eating breakfast. Trixie was beginning to think you had actually managed to talk Twilight into letting you stay. You can be rather stubborn when it comes to negotiating privileges.” At this, Trixie haughtily lifted her nose up into the air, while flashing a small wink at Spike as to say that she was joking.

“Yyyeeaahh, Twilight was pretty convincing right there at the end, though.” Spike said. “Pretty convincing that you’re something right out of ’50 Shades of Hay’.” Spike scratched the back of his head as he broke eye contact. Trixie, for her part, continued unfazed by the drake’s trepidation.

“Yes, she can be rather-” Trixie bit her lip as she rested her hands on her hip. “-Dominating- in a conversation.” She allowed a slight chuckle to herself, all while Spike did his best to think about old nuns again.

“But that’s beside the point.” Trixie flipped her hair back with her hand as she pulled off her stage hat, holding it by the tip as she reached inside from underneath the lip. “Now, feast your eyes on a gift that can only be fitting to the most worthy of receivers!”

Spike snapped out of his wrinkly trance and looked down to see what Trixie was hiding underneath her hat. At first look, you wouldn’t think that it could be anything bigger than the palm of her hand, but Spike had seen enough of her shows by now to know that she could probably hide an entire Manticore under there.

Maybe even a box of ethereal tent-NO!

In a blink, Trixie yanked her hat up from her hand, tossing it into the air as it flipped over itself and landed perfectly back on her head. Spike, having been distracted the impromptu aerial stunts of a hat, looked back down at to look at his prize. He wasn’t sure what he could expect, maybe a new cassette player, or a wristwatch, or maybe even a small…booklet of…

“Coupons?” Spike asked.

Trixie held the book between her fingers, making the pages butterfly as she waved it in Spikes gaze. “Yes! Great and powerful savings from the Great and Powerful Trixie!” She dropped the booklet into Spikes open claws, beaming as he accepted the gift.

“Wow, Trixie…thanks…thanks a lot.” Spike said, more confused that anything. Receiving a book of coupons on your birthday was something akin to going to the dentist only to get a toothbrush. He held the book in his claws as he skimmed through the pages with a mild curiosity. Starswirl’s coffee, King Pin’s bowling alley, and even Sugar Cube Corner was in there.

“Well,” Trixie continued as she pulled her hat back off and reached inside. “I wouldn't want you to spend this all in one place.”

Spike looked up from the booklet to see a bulbous pouch flying towards his face. His claws flashed up in an instant as he shielded his precious muzzle from impact, slapping the bag of bits away before realizing what it was, then trying to catch it in mid-flight as he awkwardly juggled the sack before catching it in his claws.

The bag of bits in his hands had a good weight to them, almost spilling over the sides of his palms as he gripped it. It could easily have one hundred bits on the inside of it; maybe even a hundred-fifty. Spike looked between the bag in his hand and the show mare in front of him, her hands still on her hips as she looked at him expectantly.

“Trixie, I…” Spike stuttered as he exchanged glances between the bag and Trixie. “I can’t take this. I mean, it’s nice, really, it is, but-”

“Trixie thought Twilight already told you: no ‘buts’.” Trixie shot out, blasting Spikes hesitance out of the sky. “Trixie doesn’t just give gifts to anyone, young drake, as Trixie’s generosity is spread far and wide with her performances of grandeur! To receive a gift from such as me is a rarity in itself!”

“I know, I’m really grateful, bu-”

“Or perhaps now that you’re a big, grown dragon, you think that you don’t have time to waste on things pertaining to the Annoying and Irritable Trixie? Hmmm?” Trixie crossed her arms on her chest as she looked at Spike, her eye’s fixing him with a glare as she scrunched her nose.

Spike stood dumb struck, trying to think of something to say to get back on Trixie’s good side, but the words just died on his tongue with an “uh” and “I-I”. It wasn’t too long, however, before Trixie snorted and a wide grin split her face open. Spike puffed out his scaly cheeks at the joke that he had just been made the butt of.

Trixie stopped giggling shortly after and moved in to wrap her arms around Spike’s chest, which he returned in earnest. Spike knew by now that this was simply Trixie’s way of showing affection. It was just that show mare spirit of hers that seemed to bleed into everything that she did, and it made things all the more fantastic. This is what Spike knew Twilight was talking about.

“Alright you,” Trixie began as the two released each other, “Make sure you have fun in town, and that you say hello to all your little friends.” Trixie said with a chuckle.

“Gee, sure thing, mom.” Spike said as he turned towards the grand archway. He grabbed a marble door and gave it a tug back, letting in a jet of light through the crack as he squint his eyes.

“You’re welcome. And make sure you take a breath mint before you decide to have your way with every mare in town.”

“What?!” Spike whipped his head around to gape at Trixie, only to get a face full of magical aura. The glowing magenta forced Spike through the castle doors and into the sunlight, the drake stumbling over his draconian talons as he tried to keep himself from dropping Trixie’s gift.

“ENOUGH! GO! BE FREE!” Trixie hollered at Spike as she stood watching him with an ecstatic grin, “And as my mother always said: ‘Don’t come back without grand children!’” Trixie shut the door behind her as she allowed the glow of her horn to die down, not seeing that she had pushed just enough to allow Spike to lose his footing on the tiled walkway leading to the castle.

“WoahwoahwoahwoahWOAH!” and with the last of his draconian grace deciding to retire for the day, Spike tripped over his own talons and fell down face first.

Whump!

Instead of stealing a painfully forceful kiss from the granite underneath his talons, Spike now found himself struggling for air as he was smothered by something both very soft and very pink; two particularly large somethings to be precise. Spike struggled to get a hold of something to pull himself out, his arms flailing about as he was tried desperate to breath.

Finally, his claws found purchase on the large pink mounds that were trying to swallow his head whole, pushing himself from the plush depths like a whale jumping out of the ocean.

“GUUUUUUHH!” *cough*

“Hiya, Spike!”

Spike, having finally caught his breath, looked to see one of his closest friends in front of him; Pinkie Pie. As was said before, things had changed rather subtly over the past decade, to both pony and place, and Pinkie Pie was no exception.

It had been a surprise to everyone when they had found out that Pinkie was in fact, a pony, and not some primordial entity from the between that fed on the energies of laughter and sugar. In short, Pinkie got rounder over the years, from her bottom to her top.

“Hey, how’s it goin’ PinkiiiiEEEEEEEE!”

And that’s when Spike realized that he had been giving Pinkie’s top a very friendly fondling.

Spike immediately released Pinkies breasts and yanked his claws back. “Oh my gosh, I am so sorry about that! I-I was getting pushed out the door by Trixie and-and this tile is really slick- MMPH!”

The drake suddenly found himself silenced by Pinkie’s notorious Mid-Sentence Cupcake, his fear dissipating as he began to savor the taste of raspberries and amethyst. The drake chewed happily as Pinkie stood there waiting for him to finish, a smile plastered on her face the whole time. With a gulp, Spike swallowed the treat and licked his scaly lips, a satisfied hum coming from his throat as he did.

“Sooooooo, did you like it? Was it super duper awesome? Super duper amazing? Super duper awesomazing!?” Pinkie was almost dancing in place as she looked at Spike.

“Definitely that last one, Pinkie!” Spike replied in earnest. Like he said, one does not simply refuse sweets from the Element of Laughter. “But yeah, sorry about, uh, falling on you. My talons slipped.”

“Oh Spike, you don’t have to worry about THAT!” Pinkie said with a beaming grin.

“Well thanks, Pinkie. I-”

“That happens to Mr. Cake all the time!”

“…Well, I’m not going to un-hear that.”

“Huh?”

“Uh, nothing, Pinkie.” Spike smiled as he moved in to give Pinkie a hug, which she accepted very enthusiastically. “So,” Spike continued, “What brings you around?” Spike asked the question as convincingly as he could, but he knew deep down that there was only one reason it could possibly be.

“Well, DUH! Why wouldn’t I be over here! It’s a Saturday, and that means that almost everypony has the day off, which means all the more ponies that I can make smile, and it’s even more important today because ITS YOUR TWENTY-FIRST BIRMMMMPHHMMM!”

The moment that Spike realized that Pinkie was about to shout the B-word for every creature from the EverFree Forest to Canterlot to hear, his claws reached out like a shot and cupped themselves over Pinkie’s muzzle. He held them tightly as he looked around to see if any pony had just heard the outburst. Only a few ponies who happened to be walking around on their morning errands had turned their heads to look, but upon seeing who it was, quickly went about their business as if nothing happened.

As they usually did.

“Pinkie, we talked about this, remember?” Spike whispered as he inched himself closer to Pinkie.

“Huh? OH! Oh, right.” Pinkie replied. “Sorry, I forgot you didn’t like big, loud birthday parties.”

“It’s okay. Just make sure to keep this party low-key like you usually do and it should be fine.” As soon as Spike had said this, Pinkie’s eyes went straight to puppy dog mode, as her hands slapped themselves onto Spike’s shoulders.

“But Spi~ike! This isn’t just any birthday! It’s your twenty-first birthday! But then again, you really only have a certain birthday one time, but this is the birthday that means you’re allowed to actually do cool stuff, like drinking Applejack’s special cider, or going to Half-Lidded’s Gentle Stallions club, or going to a motel at midnight with three different mares and then waking up all covered in-”

“Why would I ever do any of those things?!” Spike almost yelled before Pinkie could finish her train of thought. He had wisely cupped his claws around Pinkie’s muzzle again before she could finish her mentally scaring sentence. He had had enough of those this morning.

“Because you’re an adult now, silly!” Pinkie managed to say through Spikes fingers. The smile on Pinkie’s face never left for a second, as if she had just been talking about the weather only moments ago. Spike’s face however, was in danger of being frozen in a constant state of terror as he tried to figure out just what had gotten everyone’s mind in the gutter this morning.

“Pinkie Pie, you are something else.” Spike said with a half-way mirthful laugh.

“So what are you doing today?” Pinkie asked, trying and failing to contain her standard excitement. Spike shook the images of Pinkie Pie and motel rooms out of his head and managed to look at the pink party planner.

“Oh, not much” Spike said, “I was just gonna head into town, do a little shopping. I’m planning on stopping by Sugar Cube Corner on the way; gonna’ say high to the Cakes since I haven’t seen them in a while.”

“Oooohh, sorry Spike. Mr. and Mrs. Cake are out of town right now. They had to go to Pound Cake’s Junior Speedsters Meet. They should be back sometime around one or so.”

“Aw man,” Spike groaned, looking down at the booklet of coupons in his claws, “I was really hoping to use this to get some breakfast.” Just as Spike had finished, his stomach let out a low gurgle, voicing it’s irritation at how its owner had managed to run out the door before even taking a bite of his birthday breakfast.

“Oh, silly!” Pinkie said, “Suger Cube corner isn’t closed! Sweet Heart’s running the place until they come back. She can get you any kind of breakfast you want. Any kind.” Pinkie finished her sentence with a wink, forcing the dragon’s already heated face to turn strawberry red as he digested the words.

“Uh, P-Pinkie Pie, who’s Sweet Heart? And what do you mean by…“any kind”?

Pinkie let out a comic gasp at Spike’s question. “Oh. My. GOSH. You’ve never met Sweet Heart? She is only the most bestest pony EVER! Except for maybe Twilight, or Trixie, or Apple Jack, or Rarity, or Rainbow Dash, or Fluttershy, or Big Mac, or Zecora, or Caramel, or Mayor Mare, or toothpaste, or fire hose, or stop sign, or rail road, or Ping Pong, or blue, or purple, or Sarah Jessica Parker, or-”

“Pinkie!”

“Oh! Right! I don’t know what it means. That’s just something she says to customers when she’s running the register. But she really likes doing her job. Sometime’s she’ll even ask if she can butter their muffins or add some delicious glaze! Golly, I can’t believe you’ve never met her before!

“Yeah…” Spike’s hunger suddenly found itself dissipating for some unknown reason. “She sounds really…friendly.”

“You should totally meet her! I bet you two would be the best friends around! Or maybe the best friends in town! Which is better, around or in town?” Pinkie asked

Spike was starting to feel the conversation become dry as Pinkie Pie was about to go on another random tangent. It was silently agreed among almost everypony that Pinkie’s enthusiasm for any given situation could prove to be overwhelming. But she always wanted to leave a pony smiling at the end, so nopony really held it against her. Still, Spike had places to be, such as finding out where he could get breakfast without being molested.

“Well, Pinkie,” Spike began, cutting into the party mare’s tirade, “I got to get going if I’m going to get any of that
shopping done. Take it easy!” Spike began walking into the direction of town as Pinkie turned and watched him go.

“Alrighty, Spike! Have a super duper HAPPY-oh, I mean, have a super duper happy birthday!”

Turning around, Pinkie walked up to the doors of the castle and went inside. Spike, seeing that Pinkie was out of sight, let out a long held sigh as he gazed at the town ahead of him. He could already see ponies looking his way, just before they quickly turned and went in the opposite direction, some parents grasping their foals firmly by the wrists before almost dragging them off.

Now came Spike’s least favorite part of the day: going into town and interacting with ponies that hated his guts. He was more than likely just going to hang around the park for the better part of the day, or at least until one of the girls got him to come to the castle for his party. But even there, he couldn’t avoid the scowls of ponies as they would undoubtedly pack up what they were doing there and give him a mile wide birth. He had learned all those years ago what it meant to be a dragon in Ponyville.

~◊☼◊~

“Happy Birthday, Spike!” A cheer rang through the walls of Ponyville’s new castle. Every one of the mane 6 had showed up to give him the best start to the day that they could. Even Discord had showed up along side Fluttershy to give him his best wishes.

“Wow, guys, this is amazing!” The young whelp looked about the room to see all his friends standing about, each with a personally wrapped gift. While he hadn’t had the gift pile that was his last birthday, he decided it was for the best that maybe, just maybe, he not get too much for this year.

He opened up his presents gleefully, giving a wonderful “thank-you” to the girls as he did. He had gotten a personally carved cider mug from Apple Jack, an Autographed picture of Spitfire and Soarin from Rainbow Dash, a five pound bag of gummy-jewels from Pinkie-Pie (but only after promising not to eat it all in one night), a Tear Saphire the size of his fist from Rarity (still has it to this day), a whistle that made a random animal sound every time you blew into it from Fluttershy and Discord, and of course, a book from Twilight, “Zen and the Art of Chariot Maintenance”.

All of them chatted amongst themselves as they ate birthday cake and ice cream, though Discord had opted to turn his slice of cake into a wedge of Gouda cheese. They had all played a game of Pin-the-Tail-on-the-Donkey, danced to Pinkie Pie’s newest record, and drank as much punch as they could hold. Eventually, the sun was beginning to reach the center of the sky, and the party started to die down. They had to have the party earlier in the day so that they could all be there, and then attend to their obligations in the afternoon.

Twilight was waving off her friends as they all left one by one, Fluttershy and Discord being the last to go, as she turned and addressed her now twelve year old little brother.

“Well, Spike,” Twilight began, “how was THAT for a birthday party? Been a while since you got to celebrate it inside a castle, huh? Twilight put her hands on her waist as she stood, a bolster of confidence running through her as she looked at Spike.

“It was AWESOME! I can’t wait give this whistle a test-drive.” Just as he said this, he pulled out the whistle from his pants pocket and gave it a hard blow, immediately being rewarded with the trumpet of an elephant.

“Awesome!”

“Awesome, huh? Well, is it as awesome as getting the rest of the day off from your chores?” Twilight smirked as she saw Spikes face go from “excited” to “shock-and-awe”. He had been helping around just about as much as he could ever since the library was destroyed. From filling out order forms for books, to helping move about new furniture until his little scaly arms were sore; Spike had done it all. If there was ever a time he deserved a break, it was now.

“Really Twilight? You mean it?” Spike clutched his little claws to his chest as he silently prayed that Twilight was serious.

“Definitely, Spike. You’ve been working really hard ever since the battle with Tirek. You deserve the day off.” She patted him on the back as he kneeled down to the floor, springing pack up with a fist pump in the air.

“YES! ThankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankYOU!” Spike give Twilight a tight hug around the chest just before sprinting off towards the castle doors, his talons clicking against the marble floors all the way.

“Hey! Spike!” Twilight called out just before Spike went outside. “Make sure to be back by sundown, okay?”

“I’ll be back by twilight, Twilight. Hehe!” And with that, Spike was out the door, his childhood mirth and spirit pulling him ever step of the way. The whole rest of the day was his, free to do what ever he felt like doing. Days like this only seemed to come by lottery. He used to be assured of his holidays, but Twilight being a princess meant that sometimes she had to attend a ceremony or dinner party, which didn’t really seem to have a whole lot of party to them in the end.

After running a ways, Spike finally made it to the town square, looking in every which way direction that he could. Where would he go? The Arcade would be fun, but he didn’t want to start by spending his birthday money all at once. Sugarcube Corner was near by, but he had just eaten; it would be better to leave that for last. There was always the Spa. He had wanted to go back ever since the incident with Gabby Gums, and it would be a nice way to wind down after the party. With his destination set, he turned towards the street and merrily made his way.

“Oh, hello Spike.”

Spike stopped in his tracks upon hearing his name, and turned on his talons to see who it was. Upon seeing the mulberry coat and pink striped mane, Spike greeted the mare with a smile and a wave.

“Hi, Ms. Cheerilee! How are you doing today?”

“Oh, I’m well; just heading to the market to get some groceries.” Cheerille pointed a finger down the street that Spike was walking on, indicating where ponies where milling about at different stalls along the road. “Where are you headed?”

“I’m headed over to the spa! I’ve got the whole day off today!” Spike announced with pride, putting a thumb on his puffed out chest.

“Oh my! You must have worked extra hard for Twilight to get that. She sure is lucky to have an assistant like you at her side.”

Spike tucked in his chin as his cheeks turned a light shade of pink, rubbing the back of his head as he spoke again. “Oh, shucks, its nothing like that. Twilight gave me the day off because it’s my birthday today. I’m twelve years old now!”

“B-b-birthday?” Cheerilee stammered. Spike continued, oblivious to Cheerilee’s sudden unease.

“Yeah, July seventeenth. It’s a bummer that it didn’t come on a weekend this time around, because all the girls had to go to their jobs in the afternoon. But that just means I have more time to myself!” Spike beamed with his last sentence as it brought back thoughts of all the things he would get to do today. His smile faded, however, when he focused his eyes back on Cheerilee.

“Uh, Cheerilee?” Spike asked, a hint of concern in his voice. “A-are you okay?”

For all intents and purposes, Cheerilee most certainly did not look okay. Her left eye was twitching uncontrollably, as single strands of hair on her mane and tail started springing up and out, all accompanied by her whole body being wracked with shivers. She was almost the spiting image of Twilight after she got done with a twelve hour study binge.

“Uh, I-I-I’m sorry, w-what?” Cheerilee barely managed to make her question audible, as she stared horrified at the whelp before her.

“I said, are you okay? Gosh, you look like you just saw Nightmare Moon.”

“Oh, Oh ME? Yesyesyesyes I’m fine. Just fine. Peachy Keen! But I just remembered that uh, my cat is on the roof!

“Your cat is on the roof?” Spike’s mind was having trouble deciding to be concerned or confused.

“Yes, I-I left her there for safe keeping.” Cheerilee continued unabated. “And now I need to go feed her - on the roof. Yes. GOODBYE SPIKE!” Before Spike could get in a single word, Cheerilee about-faced on the spot and sprinted down the street, leaving only a trail of dust in her wake.

“Uh…okay?” Spike was left standing in the middle of the street as he stared at the teacher’s shrinking form. In the very least, it wasn’t the strangest thing he saw today. He still had the whistle in his pants pocket. Deciding that he could think about it later, Spike shrugged his shoulders and made his way back down the street. Before long, he was standing at the entrance of Lotus’ and Aloe’s Spa.

Ding, Ding

The door swung open as Spike walked into the Spa foyer. It wasn’t busy at all today, being the start of the week and around lunch time. Inside he saw Aloe sitting at the receptionist desk, idly browsing through a magazine before she looked up to see him walking through the door.

“Oh hello, Mr. Spike. What can I do for you? Does Princess Twilight want to arrange a spa day?” Aloe’s smooth voice settled on Spike’s frills like the oils of the spa. He had definitely come to the right place. Walking up to the counter, Spike proceeded to pull out the sack of bits from his pocket as he smiled brightly at the masseuse.

“Nah, nothing like that. I’m here to get a massage!” Spike reached up and placed the bag of bits on the counter. He smiled a wide toothy grin as Aloe did her best not to stare at the sharp draconic fangs.

“Y-yes. Very good. Will Princess Twilight and her friends be joining you today, or…?” Aloe left the question open, hoping to be confirmed that there would be at least one other pony coming in to get an appointment. These things were much less awkward when the clientele brought friends along that they could talk to, especially when the client happened to be a non-pony.

“Nah,” Spike said, “They all had to go to work today after the party.” His tone deflated as he spoke, his eye’s breaking contact with Aloe’s as he began to think about how he was starting to miss his friends.

“Oh! Your friends were having a party? What were they celebrating?” Aloe asked, hoping for a useful conversation piece as she went throughout her job.

“Oh, today’s my birthday! Yeah, we had to have the party before the afternoon; otherwise nopony would have been able to show up. But I still get to have the rest of the day off, and I decided the first thing I want to do was get a massage!”

“I-its your b-b-birthday today?” Aloe’s voice quivered as she stared at the young whelp, her eyes shrinking to pinpricks as she stood stock still.

“Yeah, July seventeenth. Sooo, I’m thinking about getting my claws filed, and maybe the mud bath, though I’m not sure if the mud baths work the same way on scales as they do fur. Do you think they would work the same way? Uh, Aloe?”

Spike looked at Aloe as stood behind the receptionist desk, still as a statue as she stared off into space. The young drake noticed that single strands of hair were starting to pop out of her mane and tail, just like with Cheerilee.

“Aloe!”

“HIT THE DECK! HUH? WUH?!” Aloe jerked her head from left to right, her pupil jittering atop of the whites of her eyes as her breathing became sharp and quick. Before long, she was able to focus back on her customer, who was looking at her as though she might drop dead any minute.

“I-I’m sorry, w-what was that?” Aloe asked, though she could stop her voice from shaking with every syllable.

“I was just asking about the baths. You know, for my massage?” Spike put his claws on the desktop as he gave Aloe a worried look. She was starting to look almost as shook up as Cheerilee did. Spike silently began to ponder if maybe there was a connection between the two.

“Ah yes, the massage. I’m sorry, Mr. Spike, but, uh, we’re absolutely booked today!” Aloe quickly pulled up an empty clip board from the desktop and stared at it intensely. “Yes, every time slot is filled from now until close. I just couldn’t possibly fit you in!” Aloe then flashed the widest smile she could as she stared hopefully at the young drake.

“But…” Spike turned away from the reception desk and looked about the foyer, noting that every sofa chair sat empty, “there’s nopony here.” Spike looked back up at Aloe, seeing small beads of sweat were starting to form on her brow as her eyes darted back and forth across the room.

“Well, tha-that’s just because they’re running late! I’m sure they’ll be here any minute now! We wouldn’t want them to arrive only to see that someone took their spot, now would we?” Aloe’s grin was starting to grow, slowly going from “salespony” to “knife wielding maniac”.

“Oh, yeah, I guess that would be a bummer.” Spike slumped his shoulders as his talons scuffed on the carpet. “Well, I guess I’ll see you later then.” Spike grabbed his bag of bits from the counter as he made his way for the door.

“Yes! Yes! Terribly sorry!” Aloe moved from around the reception desk and trailed behind spike towards the door. “Another day, perhaps! Just not today!”

“Well, maybe I could come by tomorrow? I don’t think I have anything going-“

“AH! NO!” “Aloe screamed, causing Spike to jolt back. “You can’t! I mean, uh, we won’t be open! Yes, we’re in the middle of-of-of renovations!” Aloe clasped her hands together and stood as stoically as possible.

“But…” Spike began, looking around the foyer once more. “It doesn’t look like you guys have done anything yet.”

Aloe reeled back at Spikes observation as she started biting her nails. Her eyes shot around the rooms as she glanced back and forth between the walls. In a flash, she darted to the side wall of the foyer and grabbed one of the sofa chairs, hoisting it above her head.

“RRRRAAUUUGH!”

With herculean might, she hurled the chair through the air, sending it straight towards and then through the back wall, leaving a gaping hole that let anyone see what was going on in the back rooms. Spike just managed to catch the sight of a yellow coated stallion in a bath, roughly shoving Lotus off his lap as he squealed at the invasion of privacy.

Aloe trembled with heaving breaths as she stared through the hole in the wall, before sucking as much air into her lungs as possible and straightening her posture. She turned around to look back at Spike, who had witnessed the whole debacle with eyes as wide as dinner plates.

“I’ll just come back some other time.” And with that, Spike bolted out the door and into the street. He wasn’t off the front steps before hearing the tell signs of a deadbolt being thrown into place behind him. Turning around, he saw that the sign on the door had already been flipped to “CLOSED”.

“Okay, now things are starting to get weird.” Spike thought aloud. First it was Cheerilee acting strange, and then Aloe. “And it was all after I said that…it was my birthday.” Spike’s eyes widened as the mystery solved itself in his mind. His birthday. Ponies were freaking out because it was his birthday. Spike stuffed his hands in his pockets as he gazed at the ground, slowly walking down the street towards no particular destination.

It all had to do with his greed growth a year ago. Nopony could have expected that when Spike was going through his first stages of puberty, his first signs would be growing to the size of a castle. It wasn’t like he had done it on purpose. Spike had done everything he could to try and make up for what he did, but even then, he was still just considered a baby dragon. Surely everypony wouldn’t hold something like that against him for a whole year.

“…Would they?” Spike wondered. Spike looked up from his musings as he glanced around him. Everypony seemed to just be going about their business as usual, but the more that Spike observed, the more he saw his fears holding merit. Every now and then he would see a pony in the crowd give him a sharp look, only to turn away as he made eye contact. Some would lean in towards the pony next to them and whisper, shooting glances at him as he walked. Others would fix him with a harsh glare before moving along with their business as if nothing happened.

Once, he could swear he heard the word “monster”.

Spike started to walk slower and slower, eventually dragging his talons on the ground as he did. It was quite the depressing factoid, learning that everypony in town secretly feared, or even hated you. If this kept up, he’d wind up being run out of town before the sun even started to go down. Spike shoulders slumped even lower as he finally came to a stop, seemingly fascinated with a particularly interesting brick that was lodged loosely in the roadway.

“Hiya, Spike!”

“Gyah! Pinkie!” Spike stopped on his heels as his vision became a world of cotton candy pink. The mare had, once again, appeared out of nowhere, and was now bouncing happily in front of Spike as the young whelp clutched a claw to his pounding chest.

“So watcha doin, Spike? Are you going to the arcade? Or maybe the bowling alley? I like the bowling alley, but sometimes it doesn’t smell very good because a lot of ponies who go there like to smoke, but maybe YOU would like the bowling alley because dragons have fire and fire has smoke so-“

“Pinkie Pie!” Spike interrupted, “What are you doing here? I thought you had to go work at Sugar Cube Corner today.”

“Who, ME? Oh no, silly. I don’t have to work today. I got today off because I was busy working the weekend, which was really busy because everybody had off work and we were making our special Love-a-lot Gumdrop cupcakes. It’s too bad that Sweet Heart wasn’t there. I bet she would have really liked to help out with that!”

“Oh, I guess that makes sense.” Spike straightened his shirt as he started to think about going to Sugar Cube corner. “Wait, who’s Sweet Heart?”

“Huh? Oh! I forgot that she’s not this far back in the story. You and I won’t meet her until a lot lot later.”

“Oo…kay?” Spike decided to file that tidbit of information in the -It’s just Pinkie Pie- folder of his mind.

“But anyway,” Pinkie went on, “I was just making my way down town, trotting fast, ponies pass, and I saw YOU! And I thought ‘Boy, I bet Spike would be happy to do something fun today’, but then I came over here and you didn’t look like you were very happy at ALL, and I got all sad because nopony should be not-very-happy-at-all on their birthday!”

Spike tensed at the mention of his birthday, nervously looking around to make sure that nopony had heard them as they were talking. Luckily, it seemed that everypony was choosing to simply ignore them and continue about their business.

“I-It’s fine, Pinkie.” Spike stammered, “I was just thinking, that’s all.” Spike looked away from Pinkie Pie and stared at the ground again, a sigh managing to escape as he shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Aaawwwww, come on, Spikey. You can tell auntie Pinkie what’s getting you down.” Pinkie Pie cupped Spikes face in her hands, staring into his emerald eyes as she beamed. “I Pinkie promise to help in any way that I can! Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!” Pinkie performed her ritual of honesty while Spike simply stood there, thinking about his situation as he reflected about the events of the day.

“Well,” Spike said, gazing back up at the party planner, “okay. Can I ask you something?

“You just did! Snrk Of course you can, Spikey! I’m aaallll ears!”

“Well…” Spike searched his mind trying to find the right words, “You know it’s my birthday, right?”

“Well, I sure HOPE it was today! Otherwise I set up a whole birthday party on the wrong day, and BOY, would that be embarrassing.”

“Heh heh, yeah.” Spike rubbed his arm as he looked at the ground again. Now came the hard part. “Well, you remember what happened at my last birthday, right?”

“Your last birthday? Oh, you mean the one where Rarity kissed you on the cheek because you gave her a Fire Ruby and then you went walking around town and started asking ponies to give you stuff and your tongue started to go ‘hissss’ and then you just kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger until you blew up Sugar Cube corner and then you climbed up the side of a mountain and…uh…”

Pinkie Pie slowed her speech down to a halt as she got a good look at Spike again. His shoulders slouched as his arms hung limply at his sides, his eyes gazing solemnly at the ground. Pinkie’s eyes began to soften at the sight of the saddened whelp, her hair starting to wilt as she realized the bad memories she had unwittingly dug up.

Spike’s mind was running wild with memories of that day, of the damage he had cause, the livelihoods he had uprooted from the very ground, and especially all the ponies that he had unwittingly put in danger. His draconic eyes started to brim red, as tears threatened to start streaming out. Before the first tear threatened to fall down his cheek, Spike felt himself pulled into a strong hug, his head pressed up against the soft cushion of Pinkies bosom.

“I’m sorry, Spike. I didn’t mean to make you all sad again.” Pinkie tightened her grip around the young whelp as he began to relax, soon returning the hug in earnest. They released each other after a few seconds, Spike rubbing his eyes to get the tears out.

Sniff “It’s okay, Pinkie. It’s just that, even though it’s been a whole year, I don’t think that anypony’s really forgiven me.”

“Well, that’s just silly, Spike! I forgave you the moment you said you’re sorry, didn’t I?”

“Well, yeah, you did, but-“

“And that’s the most important thing. You said that you were sorry, and I’m sure that anypony who heard it knew that you meant it, and if they want to be No-Forgiveness Grumpy Gumps, then that’s just too bad for them, because they can’t change the fact that you didn’t mean to do what you did, and that you did your best to fix it!”

“Huh…” Spike thought about Pinkie’s words, liking the sound of them as he gave them more and more thought. “Y’know what? I think your right!” Spike began to straighten his posture as he smiled brightly, new found fervor lighting in his chest. “Thanks, Pinkie. I was letting that get to me.”

“You’re welcome, Spike! Although it’s not like you have anything to worry about.” Pinkie said merrily. “I’m sure that pretty much all of Ponyville has forgiven you for that by now.”

Spike raised his brow at the statement. “Well, I’m not sure about that. I mean-”

“Of course they have, silly. And you know what; I know just how to prove it!” Pinkie Pie reached her hand deep into her mane, much deeper than she should have been able to, and pulled out a megaphone. She flashed a wide gin at Spike that sent a uneasy feeling into the whelps gut, before running up to the nearest light post.

It suddenly donned on Spike just what Pinkie was intending to do. He immediately ran up behind the party mare to try and catch her by the tail, but by the time he reached the post, Pinkie was already at the top.

“Wait, Pinkie!” Spike shouted, “It’s okay, really! I believe you! You don’t have to-”

KRRSSHHT!!

“Hey there, all you happy, prancing ponies! This is your number one party planner letting all of you know that it’s somedragon’s special day! So on the count of three, help me to wish Spike a very, very happy BIRTHDAY! One…”

The entire market place had frozen solid. Ponies enjoying lunch had food drip from their gaping jaws. A hoof ball thrown by a colt bounced unnoticed off a stallions head as his pupils shrank to pin pricks. A single sewing needle fell from the hands of a quilter and descended to the brick laden earth below, sounding its impact with a soft ting-titing.

“Two…”

Spike slowly turned about, meeting the piercing stares of every single pony in the market place, a rare sweat forming on the whelp’s brow as he saw the unadulterated fear the eyes of each and every pony. It was then that Spike knew the meaning of staring into the abyss, and having it stare back into your soul.

“Uh…” The small whelp began, “Hi?”

“THREE! Happy B-”

And that’s when the screaming started.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH!”

“NO! PLEASE! I’M TO BROKE TO DIE!”

“MY LEG!”

“MY BABIES! WHERE ARE MY BABIES?!”

“YOU DON’T HAVE BABIES! YOU’RE A VIRGIN!”

“I KNOW! I’M JUST REALLY UPSET THAT I HAVEN’T WORKED THAT OUT YET!”

“HIDE YO KIDS! HIDE YO WIVES! HIDE YO KIDS! HIDE YO WIVES!”

“MY OTHER LEG!”

“CALL A FIREMAN! WE NEED A FIREMAN!”

“DAMNIT, I’M A DOCTOR, NOT A FIREMAN!”

“STOP STEPPING ON MY LEGS!”

After what seemed like a dark age of chaos, the dust finally settled over the Ponyville market. Stands of fruit were completely upturned, spilling produce all over the street. Those few stands that had miraculously stayed upright had been swept clean of all their wares, the owners most likely packing up everything on the spot. But in a sad, dark corner of the street, a stallion in a green tunic sat among a wreckage of wood splinters and cabbage leaves, weeping his poor heart out.

Pinkie Pie slowly slid down the lamp pole and made her way to Spikes side, the both of them staring wide eyed at the destruction that laid in their wake. Spike eye twitched as his mouth hung open, silently gaping at the aftermath of Pinkie’s announcement. Pinkie bit her lip as she wrung her hands together, her mind scrambling for something to make light of the situation.

“Well…” Pinkie said, “I’ve never heard a birthday song like THAT before. Heh heh…heh.” Pinkie’s smile faltered as she looked down at Spike, noticing how the whelp was now staring at the ground again with those sad emerald eyes. The young whelp heaved a sigh and shoved his claws in his pockets, staring absently at the bricks.

Pinkie kneeled down beside the young dragon and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Aw, c’mon, Spike. I’m sure that they were just really, really excited about your birthday. Maybe they were so excited, they all decided to rush home and make you birthday cards. Or maybe presents! Yeah, and then they-“

“Pinkie.” Spike said flatly.

“Oh. Yeah, Spike?”

Spike heaved another sigh as he looked down the road, unable to help but stare at the wanton destruction of the market place. “I think-” he began. “I’m just going to head to the park today.” With a begrudged talon in front of the other, Spike started walking down the road…

~◊☼◊~

…headed to the park as he annually did.

Author's Note

GOT DAM THIS TOOK A LONG TIME!! But honestly, I'm sorry for the almost month long wait in getting this thing out. The chapter turned out to be a lot longer than I thought it would. That being said, I'm probably looking at another just as long gap between the next chapter. College comes first and all. Until the next chapter-

see you round