Not so Evil Hobo Necromancer (Redidded)

“Finally! Soon revenge will be mine” Normal talk

“Finally! Soon revenge will be mine” Inner demon, conscience, telepathy talk.

“Finally! Soon revenge will be mine” Thoughts.

“Finally! Soon revenge will be mine!” Said the ethereal form of Nightmare Moon locked inside the Moon.

Nightmare Moon used to be a beautiful midnight-blue alicorn princess, whom ruled the night of Equestria alongside her sister, Celestia, a white alicorn, who in turn, ruled the day of Equestria.

Until one day, Nightmare Moon got jealous of the fame and glory of her sisters day, and tried to engulf the land in eternal night. Celestia had no choice but to seal her sister away, confined to the moon, thanks to the Elements of Harmony.

Until today. Just a few hours left until Nightmare Moon would be on the moon no longer.

"Yeah, you will be free, then out of nowhere, the Elements of Harmony will send us back, just like that." Said Luna, the inner voice of Nightmare Moon. Luna was the true name of Nightmare Moon, before being consumed by hatred and jealousy. Now Luna is nothing more than a disembodied voice.

"I know that already, do not fret, I have a plan to end all plans!" Exclaimed the night goddess, a devilish smirk on her face.

"And I have to hear it... again..." Luna stated, with a sigh of non-existing air. She had been hearing this plan for over a millennium.

"I will summon a powerful being, a weak will in tow, to do my bidding!" Said Nightmare, unable to control her giddiness.

"Have you chosen the one you need for the task yet?" Luna queried.

"Still can't chose between the hot druid and the sexy necromancer from that demon infested planet of barbarians." Nightmare Moon said, like a a filly who can't choose what to wear to prom.

"There's still time left, Nightmare, use it wisely." With that, Nightmares inner voice sank into the depths of her mind..

"I have to say, that druid is hot." Nightmare was drooling at the thought. " Ohhh, and that necromancer... Mmmmmmm" Wow, nothing to see here people.

[Location… Planet Earth/ near the American Mexican border] late at night…

Killing time in front of his computer, sat a young, chubby, necromancer, 24 years of age, named, Vincent.

" You're all fur coat! No knickers bitches!" Exclaimed Vincent, taking another shot of sweet vodka, as he played his favorite game, Killing Floor. He was playing solo on hard mode. A true necromancer he is, still learning on his own. He has the knowledge of some white spells, a few black ones and a hardy collection of grey spells. He also learned as much as he could through voodoo, Wicca, or Christian (AKA Santeria.)

He may be chubby, but you will experience hell you so much as dare to mess with him. He had a blue belt in karate because he was kicked out for nearly breaking his teachers leg, the man said he had earned his black belt, yeah right. With the help of the almighty internet, Vincent expanded his knowledge of self-defense, learning how to be a ninja/spy/assassin.

Why the need to gain knowledge of fighting and defense? Zombies. Yep, zombies. He was always a fan, ready for the coming apocalypse. If it didn't come, he would make it come! (it's a hobby --- DEAL WITH IT! )

"The fun has been doubled!" Vincent yelled at his monitor, blowing two Flesh Pounds to hell!

Awesome as he is, he is still a goth/metal/alcoholic/brony. Well, not really an alcoholic, but it was good to drink some vodka once in a while.

'You are murdering my children' Came a from his game, he knew it was time for a boss fight. The map was WestLondon, so he set up an ambush inside the church.

What Vincent didn't notice was his lower body being engulfed by a dark blue, mystic mist of sorts.

Looking down, he had a deadpan look, and sighed. "No more vodka for

me." He said as his mouth was smothered by the mist, and he disappeared.

[Location… Equestria Old Castle Ruins] Minutes before the mane 6 arrive…

"Ow, my head. Please tell me I didn't puke on the bed again." Vincent groaned, as he awoke on the cold hard stone of the castle. Taking a look around, he found his room had expanded, or his was in the ruins of a castle, either one.

"One of two things. I'm still drunk, or dreaming." His answer was a piece of rubble to the face, as the ground shook slightly.

"Bull-F**king-Horse-sh*t!" It hurt like a bitch. He quickly stood, checked his glasses and threw the offending stone angrily at a wall. He observed it was night, and could see no exits he could get out of in haste.

"Alright, messy, long dark hair; Check. Beard; Check. Black, long sleeve shirt; check. Zombie-Vampire shirt; check. Black pants and tennis shoes; check. Now, pockets. Let's see, Wallet, pepper spray, balisong knife and keys. Back pockets, Throwing knives and skull bandana. Wait, where's my party hat?"

Quickly scanning the floor, he found his Jack Skellington Top-Hat. He likes to wear it to parties, or as cosplay.

Vincent moves from shadow to shadow, hat in hand, as paranoia began to get the best of him. He fashions a makeshift ninja mask from the Zombie-Vampire shirt he wore over his long sleeve one, adding the skull bandana around his jaw to make him look 20% cooler. He soon grabbed the balisong knife out of his pocket, doing a cool trick he learned from the spy in TF2.

"I'm sure as hell not in Texas or Mexico, and this isn't Kansas either. So aliens? No, I don't feel probed, though I might be a kidney short, a castle in Europe? Naw, this place feels... unlike Earth I guess... Somehow." Vincent wondered out loud.

He fell silent as a room to his left emitted a strong glow for about a second. Curiosity killed the cat, but he wasn't a cat, so he should be fine. He made his way to the archway, and peeked inside. Only to see his favorite MLP:FiM characters. Nightmare Moon and Twilight Sparkle. He say the episode play through before him, wide eyed.

"How is this possible? Is the multi-verse theory true? I hope so." He said in disbelieve

Sooner rather than later, Twilights friends appeared. This was exactly like the show.

Now everypony was reunited, all the mares:

Applejack the earthpony, farmer, Element of Honesty.

Rarity the unicorn, cloth designer, Element of Generosity.

Rainbow Dash the pegasus, fastest flier of all Equestria, Element of Loyalty.

Pinkie Pie the earthpony, madpartyplaner, Element of Laughter.

Fluttershy the pegasus, animal caretaker, Element of Kindness.

Twilight Sparkle the unicorn, book worm, Element of Magic.

And finally, Nightmare Moon, the alicorn, princess of the Night.

Knowing they posed no threat, he transformed back into his -20% cooler state. But added +10% awesome with his top hat and his the pepperspray in the palm of his left hand.

Now he just needed to wait for the telltale sign of Nightmare being defeated and he could show himself without being caught in the crossfire.

Before he could do just that, something seemed to grab hold of his mind, and all control of his body was given to another being for a short while. He stood in front of Nightmare Moon to shield herself from the incoming attack.

Nightmare seemed to be a little sad as she saw the creature before her, but at least this mortal would do to protect her from the attack.

Vincent stared in shock at the incoming rainbow attack.

"Hope this works!" He reached for his aura and created an extension to it, making a simple shield, usually used against spiritual attacks.

He was surprised to be able to see the shield, as usually it would be clear, and unable to be seen, it looked like a mystic bubble surrounding him. Seeing this shield confirmed that magic moved much more freely in this world, as on earth, magic could barley be used and most believed it to be common myth.

The beam hit the shield, causing the room to glow the bright white of  a thousand suns and stars. He was using all his will to stay up, as his energy drained.

"oh... oh my F'in' god... let's not do that again anytime soon..." Said Vincent, watching the now unconscious mares being to wake.

"Look at that, this hobo is useful after all." Remarked the Night Goddess.

"Hey, I am not a hobo!" Said Vincent, stamping a foot to the ground.

"Your hair tells me otherwise." Moonbutt truth'd. He even had hobo as a common nickname back home, not that he liked it. He definitely hated that nickname.

As the girls awoke, they stared in horror at the creature her blocked the Elements of Harmony. He stood on two legs, could cast magic, and was as tall, if not, taller, than Nightmare herself.

What... in tarnation is that thang'? asked Applejack, getting up to her hooves along with the other mares,

"This thing here is my latest pet, also a very talented hobo to say the least." Nightmare said, smiling at the mares.

"One last time! Not a hobo! And most definitely NOT somepony's pet!" Vincent exclaimed, anger clear in his voice.

“Well that THING certainly has no manners, just look at those grim clothes and that mess of mane, mother of Celestia, I should call the fashion police for this”. Said Rarity with disgust in her voice.

“Well EXCUSE me, Miss Rarity, but I have more manners than those snobs in Canterlot.”

“How do you know my name?!” Rarity was in shock now.

That is not important, right now I need you girls to hit Nightmare Moon with your gay magic beam again, so I can leave this place.” Yes, looks like Nightmare Moon is no longer his favorite pony. The Elements were clearly angry at his comment,

“Aw, you hurt my feelings 'PET'” Said Nightmare Moon, teasingly.

“I am NOT your PET!”

“W-why is he so scary and evil?” Said Fluttershy, hidden behind Applejack now.

“Hey, I am not a bad man, even if I do bad things, many bad things, such horrible things, wait a minute… maybe I am evil.” Vincent started to laugh like a cliche villian at his inner joke, Pinkie started to laugh along with him. Only to be stopped by a very angry rainbow pegasus in front of his face.

“Oh yeah, if you are evil I will take you down in…”

“Ten seconds flat” Vincent counters Rainbow, unimpressed.

How did you???"

“Evil!” Vincent counters yet again, with a smirk on his face.

Rainbow Dash was about to buck Vincent hard in the face, only to be stopped by a purple aura that surrounded her body and dragged her towards Twilight.

“Stop fighting Dash, we need you in order to use the Elements again.” Said Twilight not wanting her friend to get in anymore trouble.

“Yeah Dashy, unless you want me to make you cupc- OW!” Vincent was quickly silenced with a rock thrown by, non other than Pinkie Pie herself. She looked clearly pissed.

“Don’t you ever say that NAME with that MEANING here…  EVER!” Said the very angry Pinky Pie.

“Yeah, I forgot that she can break the 4th Wall, she must have found that fanfic.” Vincent thought, starting to feel sorry for her.

“I am sorry Pinkie, I will never say it ever again.”

“Pinkie Promise!” Pinkie quickly replied.

“Cross my dark heart, hope to fall to the underworld and stick a dagger in my eye, if I ever brake that promise.” It's Vincent’s twisted Pinkie Pie promise. Making everyone in the room flinch, except for Vincent and Pinkie Pie. Somehow Pinkie Pie wasn't angry for the evil twist he made to her traditional promise. “Will you forgive me Pinks?”

“Forgiveness accepted!” She said, returning to her usual cheerful self.

“Silence!!!” Said Nightmare Moon. “It’s time to end this and rule all Equestria!” She was about to do some dark magic, only to be pepper-sprayed in the face by Vincent. She lost control of her mind control spell, using another spell, making Vincent free again. Then he tackled her to make sure she didn't  try to escape.

“Do it now!” Vincent told to the Elements.

"But what about-" They all replied.

“I said do it Gun Dammit!” He told the Elements.

The Elements were reactivated and shot another rainbow to Vincent and Nightmare Moon, resulting in a bigger flash of light than the last one.

Once it was over only Luna and the Elements could be seen…

Vincent and Nightmare Moon disappeared… Forever… or maybe not.

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAA!