Colgate's Practice 3: Nipping the Problem in the Bud
Colgate's Plans
Previous ChapterNext ChapterAfter finishing brushing and rinsing Amethyst and Pearly Whites met Colgate in the throne room. Joining them were some of Colgate's regular soldiers. Once everyone got sat around the huge table Colgate uses for meetings and asked, "I'm sure you guys are wondering why I called this meeting."
Amethyst replied, "Yes, I am."
One of the regular soldiers added, "Whatever it is, I can tell it is extremely important."
Colgate replied, "It is." She cleared her throat and started, "This involves something very important to me. As you all know, it has been a goal of mine to eradicate poor oral hygiene from Equestria. Over the years the number of ponies with bad teeth have declined but I do know that we can not force all of them to brush so I have decided the time to nip the problem in the bud has come."
Pearly* asked, "What do you mean by 'nip the problem in the bud' anyway?"
Colgate got a sadistic grin on her face and continued, "It is time we take out the nation's top bakers. Yes I know it won't wipe out the creation of sugary treats entirely, but the best ones in the country must be punished severely for their crimes."
Amethyst believed that perhaps Colgate was going too far. She asked, "Sweetie, isn't that going beyond what Luna has given us her blessing on? She gave us permission to torture ponies with bad teeth, not kill the bakers."
Colgate sighed, "That is true." She then started to smile and rub her hooves together. She began to laugh, "Well we can always falsify their dental records! That way it will appear as though they have bad teeth which will make this perfectly legal! Remember honey, all my life I have always thought three or four steps ahead of everypony else!"
Pearly asked, "Oh and do you have any plans on who you want to take out. With you mentioning the nation's top bakers, I'm sure you probably have a list."
Colgate replied, "I have already compiled a list of who I want to take care of. Despite them always having good teeth, I believe it is imperative that Applejack and Apple Bloom be taken care of. After all, they cater many events and all those treats they serve are loaded with sugar."
Everypony knew how much Colgate liked those two and were shocked. Amethyst gasped, "Seriously Colgate, you are going to kill your absolute two favorite patients?"
Colgate sternly replied, "Yes dear, I am. They are great patients but still, they are the cause of many, many bad patients and I simply can no longer allow that."
Pearly asked, "And who else do you plan on taking out?"
Colgate replied, "Well I have also decided to take care of that narcissistic griffin Gustave le Grand. After all those eclairs are horrible for everypony's teeth. Then we have Mulia Mild and her chocolatey creations. If she would use the darkest form of dark chocolate that can be used she would be fine but she doesn't. She uses milk chocolate, which is very high in sugar. Then we have Twist! Those candy canes she makes rot teeth quicker than anything else because she uses high fructose corn syrup. That is much worse than sugar on the teeth."
Amethyst gasped, "Twist? But she is so innocent and young!"
Colgate replied, "Amethyst, she is in her mid twenties. She may still be innocent but she must be punished for her crimes!" She sighed and continued, "Next up we have Donut Joe. He has been ruining teeth for decades."
Pearly asked, "Wait a minute. Isn't he really close with the royal family?"
Colgate replied, "Not nearly as much as he was when Celestia was alive. After all, Luna doesn't have much of a sweet tooth. She gets along better with the butcher up there than she does Donut Joe." Just as it looked like she was about to finish her list she continued, "Oh and there is one more. We must acquire and eradicate THE ENTIRE Cake family. They have been like a cancerous tumor upon oral hygiene in Ponyville for ages."
Amethyst asked, "All of them? Even the Cake twins who are still under age?"
Colgate snapped, "Amethyst, they are nineteen years old and they are attending a baking academy in Fillydelphia so they will be threats and besides, they did help their parents before they left for the academy anyway, so they are just as guilty as their parents."
Everypony else in the room had unsure looks on their faces after Colgate gave them her list, especially after she mentioned the entire Cake family. One of her soldiers asked, "Colgate, I'm not concerned so much when it comes to who you are going to have us abduct so you can take them out, but how are we going to pull this off without being suspected?"
Colgate replied, "Well, I think it would be best if we capture them while they are out of town. Now this will take months to complete because I do not want to capture them all at once. If we were to try to do that, ponies would think that something was up. There is no guarantee that we would even be suspected but I still think this will be the best way to do it. Besides, having only one or two in here will make things a bit more fun."
Amethyst was starting to wonder about the pony she loved so much. While she knew Colgate enjoys torturing ponies, she had a bad feeling that Colgate was going to take things to a whole new level. She asked, "So regarding the Cake family, are you going to only have one of them in here at a time or will you have the whole family together."
Colgate replied, "Well I plan on having them abducted the next time the Cakes go visit their kids in Fillydelphia. Having all four of them in here at once will be better and I plan on making this hilarious."
Pearly asked, "So who is going to be first on your list?"
Colgate replied, "Well I know that there is a huge event going on in Dodge Junction on the seventh, which is three days from now. Last time I saw Applejack she was talking about how they were going to cater the event there."
Pearly asked, "So I take it you are going to want us to make sure they never make it there?"
Colgate replied, "Yes, that is my plan." Time had passed by quickly during their meeting and before they knew it, it was lunch time. They were all pleased to finally end that meeting. While they had been doing this for years, Colgate's sudden desire to target specific ponies bothered them, especially Pearly who had been used to just going after ponies with poor teeth.
Author's Note
* I have decided that from this point on General Pearly Whites will simply be referred to as Pearly as it will make things flow more smoothly.
Who will be killed
Applejack and Apple Bloom (bakers)
Fluttershy (will go to cops)
Gustave le Grand (baker)
Mulia Mild (baker)
Twist (candy maker)
Donut Joe (baker)
Mr. Carrot Cake and Mrs. Cup Cake (bakers)
Pound and Pumpkin Cake (currently at baking academy in Fillydelphia)
Speaking anomalies for Twist
ss=th (such as Miss=mith)
s-th (such as something=thomething)
It's =It'th
see=thee
st=th
us=th
is=ith
s as in plural = th (example, friends = friendth)
