Liberty Prime Invades- I Mean, Saves Equestria

Liberty Prime Invades- I mean, Saves Equestria

Part Seven, Virgins And Balls!

“-and then I showed them the ‘virgins’!”

All of the nearby gods, including God, laughed loudly at Allah’s story. God did not hear much, but it had something to do with two towers, and various incredibly brain damaged terrorists that went as far as crashing planes into buildings because they believed that killing themselves and a few other hundreds would get them laid with a bunch of virgins. The trick was that the virgins were actually male, of course. Like the author of this stupid story.

Shut up, God.

No.

*Sigh* Anyways...

“Meow.” God looked down at his feet, noticing that a small kitty was clinging onto his robe.

“You need something?”

“I REQUIRE SOULS TO SATISFY MY HUNGER!” said the kitty god.

“Sure, one second.” God snapped his fingers, and a human male wearing pajamas appeared in front of him and the kitty.

“Wha- Huh? Is this heaven?” he asked.

God sighed, “Yeah. You fell asleep face-first on your pillow and suffocated while sleeping. You were scheduled for cancer anyways, testicular cancer.” He finished with a smile.

“W-What?” the man asked, before he started being consumed by the little cat god. He thrashed and screamed as he sucked into the mouth of the kitty.

“YOU HAVE MY THANKS!”

“No problem,” said God. He turned around and looked back at the massive TV. “Let’s see how this is going.”

Celestia slowly stood up, shaking off some bits of chocolate that were still stuck to her coat. Nearby was a large, REALLY large ball with little stumps and a head- oh wait, that’s Luna. Nevermind then.

“I cannot believe we forgot you were allergic to chocolate,” said Celestia, shaking off the last bits of the brown delicacy off of her fur.

“Me neither,” said Luna, her voice squeaky as her mouth, tongue and throat were all swollen, as well as the rest of her body.

“Anyways!” Celestia said, adopting a serious tone and a militant stare. “I must save Equestria!” She then burst through the doors of her room out into the palace’s hallways, leaving the ball- sorry, Luna behind.

The Sun Princess galloped through the labyrinth of corridors that ran through the castle, heading towards its entry. Many servants gasped upon seeing her with such a decided look on her face, and mostly unable to believe that she was going that fast. (All that chocolate has to go somewhere)

She reached the main hall of the palace, were an enormous bipedal machine was standing, holding a pony on its hand, which kept yelling and trying to get out of the machine’s grasp. She also noticed her nephew, Prince Blueblood, cowering in a corner and weeping like a little foal.

“PRINCESS’ CELESTIA AND LUNA, SHOW YOURSELVES IMMEDIATELY!” the machine bellowed.

Celestia stopped in the middle of the hall, looking up into the machine’s single eye with a burning glare. “Fear not, my subjects! This evil machine will not beat me, for I am the Goddess of the Sun!”

Everyone on God’s heaven froze up, looking directly at the screen. An enormous piece male genitalia (The god of you-know-what) approached the TV and paused it, while the rest of the gods remained silent.

“Goddess of the Sun!?” one of the gods yelled. Instantly, everyone broke out into laughter, including banana, kitty and penis.

“Bitch thinks she’s a god! AAAHAHAHAA!”

“She ain’t even here, dawg!”

After the gods exhausted themselves out of pure laughter, they resumed watching the TV.

“IT DOES NOT MATTER!” The machine pointed one of its metallic fingers at Celestia. “DEMOCRACY WILL TRIUMPH! YOUR REIGN OF OPPRESSION HAS COME TO AN END!”

“HALT!” came a squeaky voice. Both Celestia, the machine and the pony in its hand looked at the stairs that led deeper into the palace. Standing, or rather, wobbling in place was Luna, who regarded the machine with the deepest frown she could manage, which was just barely visible because her face was swollen.

“You! Foul monster!” she yelled, “You will not- Eep!” Luna began bouncing down the stairs, squeaking like a toy after each bounce. She finally bounced against one of the machine’s legs, who did nothing more than to stare at her.

“CALCULATING... ADORABLENESS OVERLOAD!”

Celestia stood dumbfounded as the machine reached down and grabbed Luna. Once it examined her, it squeezed her, causing the dark blue pony/ball to squeak.

Twilight sighed, looking out through one of the many windows lined on the sides of the train. The chariot never arrived, so she and her friends opted to take the train instead. They were about to reach Canterlot by now, and if the Princess did not respond to her letter, then she must have been doing something really important. Perhaps she had even stopped the machine already, who knew.

She sighed once again, and walked over to where the rest of her friends were sitting.