The Harmony Theft

I woke up. Today was going to be a big day! I had another big theft tonight. I would need to take an amulet. I would need a cloud walking spell, and I need Blue to get me to the cloud that the Pegasus lived on. Good news, none of those fuckers of the Royal Guard would be there. The bad news, I will have to be transformed into a Pegasus to gather info. I wont take the amulet as a pony. I have tried to steal as a pony before. I got arrested. I wasn't as stealthy as I was as a human. I would have to take flying lessons with Blue, but that didn't seem to hard. When Chrysie turned me into a pony, we got right to it. It was as easy as dropping copers. Then again, cops are stupid. We robbed banks all around and they couldn't get us. I flew up to the cloud and knocked on the door with my wing. 'Okay Ryan. You can do this.' I was a Stallion with a white coat, red eyes, and a blue and light blue mane and tail. Of course, I was a Pegasus. The door opened and I almost shit my pants (If I was wearing them) when I saw who I was stealing from. It was that Pegasus who I tasered.

"Can I help you?" She asked.

"Ummm..." 'Think you piece of shit! You have done this before.' "Hey."

"Who are you?" She asked.

'Shit...Think. Think. Think!' "I'm...White Tone." 'Well, I'm fucked.'

"Hey White, may I help you with something?"

'Okay, think again.' "Umm...you probably have heard of the thief who stole the crown right?" 'I am fucked!'

"Yeah, he stole that from a friend of mine. What about it?"

"Well...I was sent here to see if you would have anything that is of high value. He might strike again and you may want to keep it safe." 'Defiantly doesn't sound suspicious at all. Fucking moron!'

"Actually, I do." She said.

"Well...funny you should say that, because that's what I was sent here for." 'Hello jail, good to see you again.'

"Oh...really?"

"Yeah." 'She must be playing cool. If not, she is fucking stupid.' "May I see it?"

"Yeah, come on in."

'What?' "Ummm...okay." I half expected the Royal Guard to be inside waiting to arrest me, but to my luck, they weren't.

"Can I get ya something?" She asked me. "Food, drinks?"

"Na, I'm good." She walked into her bedroom and came back out with it. 'God...she's a beauty! The most beautiful thing I have ever seen!' I couldn't keep my eyes off it. The gold and the gem! They looked beautiful! The red lightning bolt gem was the best "Wow..."

"Like it?" She asked.

"You shouldn't be asking me that. The thing is the one who wants to steal it." I had to say thing, they don't know what a human is.

"You sound concerned."

"Well, I wouldn't want it to get stolen. It's a nice amulet."

"Yeah it is, so do ya want-"

"Whoa! would you look at the time!" I looked over at the clock. "I should get going." I didn't give her time to respond, I left out the door and flew away.

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"You guys aren't going to believe this." Dash said.

"What is it Dash?" Twilight said.

"Some hot stallion came up to my door." She said

"Oh come on Dash," Rarity said. "He can't be that good looking for you to admit that he is handsome."

"I'm not joking Rare." Dash said. "He was. His name was White Tone."

"What did he want?" Twilight said.

"He wanted to make sure I was keeping my amulet safe," Rainbow said. "He sounded concerned that I might be next to have something stolen from me."

"Do you want me to have guards a your place just in case?" Twilight asked.

"Na," Dash replied. "It's not gonna happen."

"Okay..."

"Yo!" I flew down next to her. "Hey, listen, sorry for leaving like that. I had something I needed to do. So...about that hiding place."

"I have it taken care of. It's hidden in my room." Dash said. "So what did you-" The White mare pushed her away.

"Hello, I'm Rarity. Nice to meet you." She shook my hoof.

"Ummm...hi." I responded.

"So did you have anything planned today? I thought we could do something together."

"O...Kay...Ummm." I looked over to Rainbow Dash. "So you said you hid it in your room?"

"Yep."

'Got it!'

"As is mine." Rarity.

"Mine as well." The orange one said. "Name's Applejack. Nice to meet ya."

"Nice to meet you too." I said.

"Me too!" The pink one said. "It's in it supper dupper secret hiding spot."

"And you are?" I asked her.

"Pinkie Pie!" She jumped and down. Once she stopped, she opened her mouth and confetti shot out onto me. The weird thing was it was dry. Oh and also, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?! I looked over to the yellow Pegasus.

"And you?"

"Oh...ummm...I'm....ummm...f-f-f..."

"That's Fluttershy," Rainbow Dash said. "She is kinda shy."

"Never would have guessed that." I said sarcastically. "Shy is in her name after all." 'JACKPOT! All of these ponies have amulets! I better tell Chrysie about this!'

"And I'm Twilight Sparkle." My last victim said.

"Nice. Any way, I best be going. It was nice meeting you all." I flew off into the sky to get back to Chrysie.

"Dash..." Rarity said.

"Yeah?"

"You were right. He is handsome."

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"Okay," Blue whispered. "You ready?"

"Yeah," I Whispered back."

"Okay. When you are done, Jump off the cloud right there." She pointed to the right side of the cloud.

"Got it. See ya later." I slowly made my way to the house. I tried the door. Locked. All the windows were locked as well. I got my lock picking tools and started picking the lock.

Click

Got it. I slowly opened the door and closed it behind me. I made my way to her room. The door was open a little. I looked in. She was reading? What the fuck?! She is using a flashlight to read! Why not turn the light on so I could have waited and avoided being detected easier?! I waited for 5 minutes. She finished the book. Thank- SHE PULLED OUT A FUCKING NOTHER ONE! What the fuck?! I was about ready to tase her again and take the amulet and be gone. 30 minutes later she was done with tha- FUCK YOU! ANOTHER FUCKING BOOK! I'm done. Taser it is. "Remember this little guy?"

"What? Who's that?!"

"FREEZE FUCKA!" I kicked the door open, flicked on the light, and pulled my T62 out and shot it at her. Almost! Why can't I ever hit a still target? "...Shit..." She flew out of her bed and tackled me. Cops did this every time. I knew what to do. I headbutted her and rolled over her to I was on top. I picked her head up and slammed it into the ground. She was dazed. I grabbed some zip ties from my pocket. They finally came to use! I always carried them just in case. I rolled her onto her back and put her front legs behind her back and zip tied them together. One around one leg, one around the other, and one in between them to connect them. Her legs were over her wings so she couldn't use them. I started looking around her room for the amulet.

"A little birdie told me that you have something valuable. Where is it?"

"Who..."

"Some mare, now where is it?"

"I'm not telling y-"

"Found it." I said. I held it up. "Wow, this is really nice."

"Give it back!"

"Finders keepers, losers weepers." I teased her. I kicked her over on her back and gave her a punch to the face. "That was because I missed my taser shot." I saw the books. A smile grew across my face. I got my lighter out. "And this, is for making me wait." I held up a book for her to see and light the lighter.

"NO! Please don't! I beg you, please!"

"Awww," I said. "Little Mrs. book worm gonna cry?" I brought the flame closer to it.

"Please! I haven't read that one yet! That was the next one I was gonna read!" I looked at the title. Daring Do? Looks like an Indiana Jones knock off. I started laughing.

"This is what you read? God this looks like garbage. Anything that is a knock off of Indiana Jones is gonna be stupid. I'm not going to burn it. It's already bad enough." I set it back down. "So... anything else that is actually good before I leave?"

"What the buck is Indiana Jones?! It sounds stupid." I looked over to her.

"God I can't believe I'm saying this... Indiana Jones was the thing that Daring Do was ripped off from. Tell me, did she take an idol and the a giant boulder chased her?"

"Yeah. In the first book."

"Well, I the first book AND movie, that is what happened to him."

"Well she didn't keep the idol because-"

"It belongs in a museum? That was what he said." I looked around more. Nothing. "Well, I'm off. I will see you, never. Smell ya never bitch." As I walked to the door, I kicked her in the gut. I started whistling the Indiana Jones theme as I walked away. 'God, now I'm in the mood for some Indiana Jones.' I walked out the front door and jumped off the right side of the cloud. Blue caught me and we made off to Chrysalis.

"Nice to see you returned. It's about time." Queen Chrysalis said.

"Sorry," I apologized to her. "The little shit was a book worm and I had to wait it out. I stopped waiting once she brought out a third book."

"Ah I see. Did you get the amulet?"

"Yeah, It's right here-" I felt my pocket. My eyes widened. "SHIT! I dropped it when we were flying!"

"Are you serious?!" Blue said.

"I was hoping you'd say that, cus I'm not." I held the amulet up and laughed.

"You are such an ass." Blue said. I tossed it to Chrysalis.

"Good work. You need to rest up." Me and Blue headed to bed.

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"THAT LITTLE!" Dash screamed.

"Calm down Dash." Twilight said.

"CALM DOWN?! HE HUMILIATED ME AGAIN, AND TOOK MY AMULET!" The six ponies and some Guards examining the crime scene where in her room. Somepony heard her screams for help and found her tied up and on the ground. "I should have taken your Guard advice."

"Well, now we all need some Guards. He might take one of your amulets next." Twilight said to her friends. She sighed. "I need to rest. Preforming that cloud walking spell on you all really tired me out. Lets get going.