Rainbow Dash had been flying for a little while now. He remembered when she took off, and soared into the skies. It was a bit more exhilarating than he previously thought. An adrenaline rush had coursed through him to the point of no return, something that he loved to feel. Spike wished he had wings like hers, but a different color. Purple would be nice.

Maybe Twilight could just clone hers onto Spike’s back.

He shook his head. Pony wings on a dragon’s body screamed unacceptable to Spike, especially Twilight’s. Her pretty purple princess wings were the size of him alone! So he made note to discuss thoroughly with Twilight at some point to devise a way for him to get wings, one that he hoped wouldn’t kill him in the process, or worse, make him an extremely deformed corpse.

Spike closed his eyes and sighed as he felt brisk air tickling his scales. Rainbow Dash made his inner Death feel so… removed. Spike was more worried about not dying than anything—well, except this talk he was supposed to have with a certain stallion. Whoever it was, hopefully they don’t ask for anything. All Spike wanted to do was relax, kick back, and watch the sunset without anyone else stomping in to ruin his relaxation.

“Hey Spike?”

“Hmm?”

Spike opened his eyes.

“We’re here.”

Slowly Dash had descended without him knowing. She was hovering over the entrance to Sweet Apple Acres and—

“Why are we here, Dash?”

“To see two special ponies,” she replied rather bluntly, before sticking her landing. She hopped once more to make sure she wouldn’t lose her balance, and turned to Spike with a smile. “Thank you for riding Daring Dash Airlines! Please make sure you don’t fall flat on your face as you leave, because that would be totally not cool.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Work on your voice, Dash.”

“It’s getting there!” She paused and grabbed the dress with her teeth. “That’s mine, bub.”

He felt the whiplash from her snatching the dress right out of his hands. He couldn’t feel his fingers. “This is what I get for holding your dress.”

“Wait, so you weren’t stealing it?” She tilted her head.

Spike facepalmed with his numb claw. “Why would I need a dress?”

“I don’t know, maybe you like to crossdress?”

“Not sure ‘bout that, Dash. I never heard of a dragon crossdressin’ before.”

The two turned to the new voice, both wearing confused expressions. “Applejack?”

“Yep! Told ya I was meetin’ you at the gate, Dash.”

“Must’ve whizzed over my head and crash landed into Twilight’s castle,” Dash said as she approached her friend. She held out a hoof and smirked. “Glad you agreed to help me with this.”

Spike gawked. Helping her with what?

“No problem!” Applejack replied jovially, bumping hooves with her friend. “You been talkin’ ‘bout all this dancin’ and such, so givin’ ya a quick crash course on barn dancin’ shouldn’t be too much of a problem.” She gave Rainbow Dash a mighty smirk. “Unless you go surprisin’ me with your two left forehooves.”

“Oh puh-lease, AJ! I could dance circles around you!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed, pushing out her chest. “I don’t go to the club just to drink myself to death while watching others dance!”

Applejack rolled her eyes. “Clubs are different than formal barn dances. We don’t dance in fancy circles, we dance in squares.”

“I can dance in squares!” Rainbow Dash shot back. “Just you wait and see! I—”

“Um… I’d hate to butt in on this sexual tension, but could you do me a favor, Applejack?”

The mare in question turned to Spike with a quizzical look on her face. “Yes?”

“Where’s your brother?”

“Oh, is that all ya wanted?” Applejack asked, which earned her a stern nod from Spike. She smiled, and pointed a hoof behind her. “Just head on over to the Southern fields. He’s been plowin’ for the whole day today!” Her smile slowly diminished. “I wish he’d take a break every so often. Farmin’ has been runnin’ him plum dry.”

Rainbow Dash bumped into Applejack’s side, giving her friend a quick nuzzle. “That’s why I brought Spike along! Since I’m busy heading to the barn dance tonight—”

“You never told me about this barn dance,” Spike interrupted.

Rainbow Dash drew out a very irritated sigh. “It wasn’t important to say, that’s all.”

“Okay…” Spike’s lips wormed into a small ‘o’ shape. “Well, you two have fun doing... whatever you’re doing. I’ll go see what Big Mac’s doing.”

“Alright, cya!” Rainbow Dash shouted, waving with her wing, earning her a hoof smack by her good friend. “Ow, what was that for?”

“How about you show how you’d use those wings to dance circles around me?”

“Oh you’re so on.”

Spike made his way down to the South fields, leaving Applejack and Rainbow Dash alone in their dancing escapades.

A gentle breeze caressed the treetops of the apple orchard, leaving the field of which Big Mac was plowing completely void of Nature’s touch. He stood there, fighting the sweat on his face, preparing to pull that plow again for another pass. Spike could only see him from afar, wondering how he managed to just… work without passing out. It was something that Spike wished he had. If he could, then he wouldn’t have to worry about being tired. He could just work and enjoy what he loved doing, without anything hindering him.

Spike emerged from the forest of apple trees, and waved to the Big Mac, who jolted and gazed at the dragon with wide eyes.

“Spike?”

Spike smiled and approached his bro. “Hey, Big Mac. Long time, huh?”

“Eeyup,” Big Mac replied, hoisting the yoke over his head.

“Busy with the fields?”

“Eeyup.”

“And dealing with Applejack?”

He nodded rapidly to that one. “Eeyup.”

Spike grimaced. “That bad?”

Big Mac took pause, his eyes drifting to the treetops around the two, before he shook his head. “Nope. She just… been workin’.”

That was Big Mac’s trademark: short sentences or one word responses. Nothing more, nothing less. Spike couldn’t expect a longer conversation than the ones he’s had with Big Mac in the past.

“So whatcha come here for?”

The question brought Spike back to the conversation. “Rainbow Dash, primarily.” He rolled his eyes. “She thought I needed to hang out with someone instead of moping around and relaxing.”

While Big Mac chewed on his response, Spike thought about it. Was he moping when he spoke with Dash? He felt like he was waiting for that informant that Rarity wanted him to meet more than anything. It was his goal to be a helpful dragon, after all.

So why did she say he was moping?

“That sounds… rough, Spike.”

That got Spike confused. “You think so?”

“Eeyup. That’s somethin’ I struggle with too.” The big red stallion beckoned him with a hoof. “I got an idea. Let’s go for a walk.”

“Why are we going for a walk?”

Big Mac sighed. “Walkin’ in the orchard is much better than standing out in the fields.” He nudged the little drake. “Besides, my sister’s thinkin’ I don’t take breaks, so I guess we need to prove her haysay wrong.”

Spike chuckled. “Guess so. Alright, lead the way.”

Big Mac tossed his yoke around one of the plow handles, before leaving with Spike through the orchard. As they walked, big red apples were tucked in the branches of the trees, dangling as the wind still kissed the tops of them, and the sun praised the fruits of the land with its orange glow. It was…

“Magical, ain’t it?”

Spike bobbed his head. “Was just thinking about this place. Wonder why I don’t swing by to take a quick nap once in a while.”

Big Mac laughed. “I think you get why Rainbow decides to sleep here.”

“Partially,” Spike began, rubbing the back of his neck. “I get the reason why, I just don’t see why she thinks a tree is comfortable to sleep on.”

“Nestin’, probably.” Big Mac stopped and looked up at the trees. “Birds like ‘em so much, that they put their young up there, so I don’t see why she wouldn’t like ‘em.” He rubbed his hoof against the grain of the path they were on. “Better than sleeping in the dirt, where their wings get all messed.”

“Never thought of it that way,” Spike said. Indeed, he hadn’t. Not that he was wanting to think about pegasi laying in trees. He was more…

“A really superdidooper favor?”

...worried about other problems.

“Hey Big Mac?”

Big Mac let out a low, gravelly hum. “Eeyup?”

“Why am I so worried?”

“Oh, can you do something for me?”

“Tell me what errands you need done, and I’ll get them done.”

“Probably because you’re so busy,” Big Mac replied lamely.

Was that it? Was he just extremely busy? Was he just wanting to help other ponies?

Spike couldn’t help it. His fingers were just numb to the possibilities. He couldn’t just stop thinking that he was trying to help others, because that all he wants to do. He has to help the others that hatched him, helped him, made him who he was—it was the dragon code, and it was his goal to abide by it.

So he did, and that was how it always been.

“Yeah…”

“Seems like you’re not so sure,” Big Mac said, looking at the little dragon. “You wanna talk about it?”

“What’s got you so upset?”

Spike shook his head. “I’m not wanting to talk about it.”

He could feel the disappointment coming through. He knew that Big Mac would just push it aside, tell him that he’d wait, and it would irritate him, much like how Twilight would just—

“You know you could talk to me about anything.”

It made Spike visibly grimace, which sparked Big Mac to stop in his tracks and shoot Spike an inquisitive look: one with a brow threatening to leave his face. His right forehoof clamped down on the solid earth, building a plume of dust in its wake.

“Spike,” Big Mac sighed. “Come take a seat by the tree here.”

Spike watched as the stallion propped himself against the tree’s stump, much like how Rainbow Dash did a little while ago. So he followed suit, reluctantly, his claws pit-pattering against the dirt before taking refuge in the grass beside his friend.

The two just watched the trees dance in silence.

And then Big Mac spoke.

“The worst thing to do is to have everything just bubble up inside you, like when ya shake some cider up in a bottle and watch it burst the cork right off. Problems just keep comin’, and they keep shakin’ ya up until you can’t be shook no more.” He paused and rubbed his back against the tree. “Feelin’ this way won’t help ya none. So why not just let loose?”

Spike tilted his head. “But didn’t Applejack say you don’t take breaks?”

Big Mac threw a hoof at that comment. “She don’t know I do it, so I can make sure she don’t see me no different than Pa.” He shook his mane a bit, before leaning his head against the bark of the tree. “Pa’s a hardworkin’ pony. He don’t take breaks. He always said, ‘I’d have it done while you’re sittin’ there thinkin’ about it!’” A smile wormed onto Big Mac’s face. “He’s a great pony. That’s why I want AJ to see me that way too.”

“I don’t think she wouldn’t see you any less great if she saw you taking a break,” Spike said, scooting closer to the stallion. “She told me she was worried about you being tired all the time.”

The smile dissolved from existence. Only hurt gave residence, a hurt that caused the giant to frown. “I guess so. Maybe we both gotta show ourselves more, huh?”

Spike didn’t get it. Show himself more? What does he mean?

“If you’re feeling down, don’t hesitate to come talk to me, so you can turn that frown upside—”

“Down…”

“Huh? You say somethin’?”

Spike waved his claws. “Just thinking out loud.”

Big Mac playfully nudged the dragon with his hoof. “Come on, don’t be that. Let loose, remember?”

“Alright, alright,” Spike said, chuckling. “I was just thinking about Pinkie and how she told me I shouldn’t be feeling the way I do, and that if I felt that way again, she’ll help me turn my frowns—”

“—upside down?” Big Mac finished.

“Y-Yeah.”

A cloud overhead, gray as can be, stayed above the two pals.

“And what have you been feeling?”

Spike felt his heart tug. Should he say it? Would Big Mac just shove it aside? Would there be a reason to say it? Spike knew he had said it before, and ponies have reacted to him, pitying him and such, but was it worth it to get another pity call?

He sighed and opened his mouth.

“I hate myself.”

The words echoed in Spike’s ears, while his inner Death smiled. He wondered if they were just going to haunt him just for Death’s entertainment, or until the cows came home. Maybe if he wasn’t so strung on getting killed, he wouldn’t have this problem and—

“Eeyup, I hate myself too, sometimes.”

Those words hit Spike harder than any fastball that Celestia would ever throw at his skull.

“Y-You do?”

Big Mac nodded. “Eeyup. Hate not being able to do more with my family because of who I am.” He cracked his neck slightly. “I also hate not being able to help Apple Bloom out with her homework. AJ works with her most of the time. Wish I could understand it so I could help her out too.”

Spike looked down and twiddled his claws. What could he say to that? What could he say about himself? What...

The dragon growled, gritting his teeth. “W-Why? Why do I do this?”

“Well, for the past two months, I’ve grown to hate myself, to the point of having no choice but to consider my options.”

“Because you don’t know where to go. So ya just let it fester on up, because someone’s gonna tell ya that they’re sorry, that they’re not happy that you’re feelin’ this way, and that you need help, but they don’t know where you should go either, because they ain’t you.”

He understood. Big Mac understood everything.

“So what do you do?”

“I just work. It helps me cope.” He let out a huge grin. “Apples just… apples make everything better for me. That’s why I work a lot. And that’s why I take a few moments to just… take in this place.”

The cloud slowly drifted away, while the trees danced and danced and danced.

“I’ve been tryin’ to free up more time at the end of the day to play with Apple Bloom. Granny ain’t happy about it though, she gets a bit too grumpy at night and just wants to sleep, while AJ just wants Apple Bloom to get her homework done, so she don’t have to stay up with her doin’ math problems. Too bad for them though, Apple Bloom needs some big brother time too.”

Spike smiled.

“So you’re saying I just need to find a way to cope?”

“Eeyup. Cope and relax. Find a way to make life more manageable. And ya gotta let loose sometimes. Otherwise, you’ll turn into someone you’re not.”

“Alright. I think I’ll try doing that,” Spike said, before curling his fingers into a ball and offering his claw for a fist-bump. “Thanks, Big Mac.”

Big Mac returned the gesture with his hoof and got up. “You’re welcome, Spike.” He turned to the dragon. “Now let’s get ya back home before the girls wonder where you’re—”

“SPIKE!”

The world shook, causing apples to rain from the branches above. Spike shielded himself from the apples with his arms, while Big Mac stood his ground, the apples simply ricocheting off his back.

“—at.”

Author's Note

If you can't tell, I really love Big Mac's character.

Also, Twilight's great.