Heavy woke up, and felt his head swimming. There was something wrong with his eyes; the world around was a monochrome blur. He stood up, and found that his head seemed far heavier than usual.

The corners of his mouth raised slightly at his unintentional pun.

Looking around, he saw that he was standing in a flat, grassy area.He raised a hand to his forehead, finding it covered with a coarse matting of hair. How long had he been asleep for? He always kept his scalp completely shaved.

The world had stopped moving, but still remained drained of colour. Maybe Medic could find out what was wrong.

"Doktor?" Well, at least his voice was the same. "Doktor, where are you?"

"I am here, mein freund," said Medic's voice from somewhere by Heavy's feet.

"Doktor? I cannot see you, doktor!"

"Down here, Herr Heavy. Ach, do not shout, bitte. I feel like I spent zhe night drinking mit Herr Demoman." Heavy looked down.

"Doktor, is that you?"

"Ja. Could you give me a hand, bitte?" said the miniature pony. "I... oh, zhis is embarrassing. I do not seem to be able to get up. Could you help me?" Heavy stared, a grin breaking out over his face.

"Heavy, vhat are you - waugh!" The Medic let out a squeak as Heavy bundled him up into a bear hug.

"Doktor is pony!"

"Heavy... "

"Doktor is so cute!"

"Heavy, I cannot breathe!"

Heavy placed Medic gently back down. The miniature pony squatted on the ground, and Heavy could not help but beam at the spectacle.

"Danke, Herr Heavy. Now, let us just get zhis out of zhe vay: I am not a pony."

"Nyet!"

"Ja, Heavy. I am completely fine. You, however, are not." Heavy suddenly remembered why he had to find Medic.

"Doktor, what is wrong with Heavy? All I see is black and white!"

"It is simple, mein freund. Zhe spell vhich Merasmus put upon us has transformed you into a mythological creature; a minotaur, to be exact. I suspect zhat you see in black und vhite because your new body is of a decidedly bovine nature."

"Heavy is cow?"

"Nein, you are a minotaur. Vhich, I suppose, is sort of like being a cow but viz all zhe benefits of a human body."

"HEAVY WILL CRUSH PUNY WIZARD!" he thundered.

"Calm down, bitte!" Medic pleaded. "Anyvay, it is not all bad. You are quite probably retaining a considerable amount of physical strength, if your impressive build is anyzhing to go by. Also, you appear to be covered viz red fur of some kind, vhich vill make up for zhe fact zhat your transformation removed all of your clozhing. Und besides, at least zhe spell did not cause me to transform into anyzhing."

"Nyet!" said Heavy happily. "Doktor is pony."

"Herr Heavy, how many times must I tell you? I am not a pony!"

"Nyet! Doktor is pony."

"Heavy... "

"Look at hands, doktor." Medic did so, glancing down at his gloved hands.

"Zhere is nozhing strange about mein- waugh!"

"See?"

"Vhere are mein hands? Vhere are zhey?"

"Silly doktor. You are pretty pony now. Pony has hooves, not hands."

Medic felt faint. He put a hand - no, a hoof - to his forehead. And stopped.

"Herr Heavy. Tell me, is zhere somezhing on mein head?"

"Da. Doktor has horn." Medic absorbed this information for a few seconds.

"I... am a unicorn?"

"Da. If that is word for pony with horn."

"Oh, zhis is not good. How can I fight like zhis? Not to mention perform surgery! I need hands, not hooves!"

"Do not worry, doktor. Heavy will protect you." Medic looked up at the towering minotaur, and smiled.

"Danke, mein freund."

"Doktor is welcome." Heavy suddenly caught sight of something just above Medic's hind leg. He stared.

"Heavy?"

"Da?"

"Vhy are you staring at my... posterior?"

"Doktor has tattoo on ass."

"Vhat?" Medic craned his head around to take a look at the affected area. "Interesting. I appear to have a marking in the shape of mein class symbol on my... flank. Curiously enough, Heavy, you also have a class tattoo on your shoulders."

It was at this point that Heavy's stomach began to rumble. Medic chuckled.

"Now, vhat does zhat noise tell us, Heavy?"

"That I am hungry?"

"Vell, ja, but also zhat eizher Merasmus' spell removed zhe contents of our stomachs, or ve have been unconscious for some time. I too am hungry, und I ate before zhe mission."

"Da. We must find sandviches, and fast. Heavy cannot stay mighty without lots of sandvich."

"Ve must also find our comrades, Herr Heavy."

"Da. Sandvich first, then comrades." Heavy drew himself up to his full height, and Medic noted that while it was not as tall or physically imposing as his human form, the minotaur still towered above him. "Doktor, where should we go?"

"Vell, as ve do not know vhere zhey are, ve might as vell just pick a random direction und start valking."

"Is good idea. Follow me, doktor." Heavy began walking, but had barely moved a few steps before stopping as he heard a thump. He turned, and to his surprise he saw Medic sprawled face-first on the ground. In between snorts of laughter, Heavy asked:

"What... what happened to you, doktor?"

"I am having great difficulty valking viz zhese hooves. It is qvite to stay upright."

"Take Heavy's hand, doktor." Medic stood, wobbling precariously as he put his weight on the minotaur.

"Zhank you, freund, but zhere is no need to treat me like a- waugh!"

"Oh, Medic looks so cute falling over like that!"

"Shut up."

"Heavy knows why doktor cannot walk."

"Und vhy is zhat?"

"Doktor is not human anymore. Doktor is pony. Pony cannot walk like human, so doktor must walk like pony."

"...vhat did you say?"

"Doktor must walk like pony."

"I vill not. It is humiliating." Heavy leaned down, putting his face close to Medic's. It was not particularly easy, given that his face was mostly nose, but he managed to make it look menacing nevertheless.

"Doktor. Must walk. Like pony."

"Nein."

"Then Heavy will carry you."

"Ach! Nein! Nein!" Medic, swallowing his pride, dropped to all fours. Heavy looked pleased.

"Now, how does Medic feel?"

"Zhis is... surprisingly comfortable. I realise zhat I should not have been so qvick to doubt you, mein freund. Alzhough it does frustrate me zhat you can valk normally, und you have hooves and legs zhat bend back upon zhemselves!"

The pair walked through the pleasantly-grassed plain for a few minutes more, before Medic broke the silence.

"Heavy, do you have to valk like zhat?"

"Like what?"

"Like... ach, I cannot say zhis." Medic tried to find the right words to sum up his dilemma. "You are avare, Herr Heavy, zhat you are not vearing any clozhing?"

"Da."

"Vell... uh... zhe vay you valk, it is proving to be rather distracting." Heavy laughed.

"Doktor should not be staring, hmm?"

"Ach! Nein! Zhat is not vhat I vas doing! It is just... you are making me uncomfortable, alright?"

"I do not see why. Medic has seen heavy in shower before after battle, da?"

"Vell, ja... "

"Then doktor must think of world as big shower room."

"How profound, Herr Heavy."

As they walked, Medic looked around. The sun shone brightly overhead, and although there was hardly a cloud in the sky the temperature was not at all unpleasant. Medic supposed that this could be attributed to his lack of clothing. To the right was what seemed to be a forest, and more grass was to the left.

"Doktor, look!" Medic turned his head upward to see his towering friend pointing up at the sky. He followed Heavy's finger with his gaze. "Is big bird, doktor."

"Zhat does not look like a bird to me."

"Then what could it be?"

"Of zhat I am unsure."

"Aha!"

"Wos ist los?"

"There is a road ahead. Maybe we should follow it, doktor." As they reached the road, Medic saw a small wooden sign and walked up to it.

"Vell, zhis is interesting. Do you see zhe sign, Heavy?"

"Da... "

"It is just zhe right height for one of my stature. I am unsure vhat zhis means, but... "

"But what, doktor?"

"Oh, nozhing. Just be careful, mein freund."

"Do not worry, Medic. I will protect you."

"Aha, you say zhat every time!"

"And that is because I mean it." Medic looked at the text on the sign, puzzled.

"Hmm. Zhis is not encouraging."

"Do you know where we are?"

"I am afraid not. You see, zhis sign is in a language zhe likes of vhich I have never before seen. Zhere does appear to be an arrow pointing to zhe left, zhough. If I had to guess, vhich I do, I vould say zhat it points tovards a town of some kind."

"Then we must go there." Medic smiled up at Heavy.

"For zhe sandviches?"

"Da. And then we will find RED team."

Author's Note

Fun Fact: Heavy's current species was inspired by the Minsk Beast costume.