The Taxonomy of the Lower Reaches of the Discordian Dimensions

Discord woke up late.

When he was on his own he often slept in when he felt like it, and his body clock, like the rest of him was rather irregular. Though he had made the effort to get up early to search for the monster, on this particular morning his brain had granted him a lovely dream.

Fluttershy wandered into the room with the soft throw draped around her to stave off the cold morning air, only to find the sleeping draconequus curled up with his arms around a pillow. His muzzle was buried in it. He seemed fast asleep until he spoke: "Fluttershy."

"Good morning, Discord," she said in response.

There was no reply and Discord continued to breathe steadily. She watched the rise and fall of his lungs.

"Erm, shall we have breakfast?" Fluttershy tried again.

Again there was no response and Discord continued to snooze.

"Mmmph, Fluttershy," he said into the pillow. His lizard foot twitched and his tail swished back and forth, then he rolled over on his side, taking the pillow with him and began to snore.

She realized he must have been exhausted. Fluttershy had gone to bed reasonably early but she had no idea what time Discord had bedded down. He really had been trying his best to find the monster. He'd continued his work on the species sheets and spent most of his time searching at either the bow or the crow's nest.

Fluttershy pulled the throw off her back and draped it over Discord's body. His bushy eyebrows and snout peered out from the top of the blanket and he instinctively pulled it around him and resumed snoring.

Fluttershy sat down on the bed and looked down at the draconequus's sleeping form. He looked so peaceful when he was asleep. It was one of the few times he seemed to keep still for more than a minute.

Without thinking, she reached out and stroked his mane softly, causing him to shift slightly in his sleep and move closer to her. His right ear twitched once and his breathing steadied again.

Suddenly Discord opened his eyes and sat bolt upright. He was awake! It was a dream, though Fluttershy was here with him. Then he looked back over his shoulder at her, his eyes suddenly cold and hard.

"How much of that did you hear?" he said.

She realized he might have been dreaming about something he was embarrassed about. Nevertheless, all she had heard was her name. Was he embarrassed about her?

“You…weren’t making sense,” Fluttershy said. She guessed correctly that if Discord knew she was aware he had said her name out loud in his sleep he might feel embarrassed.

Discord pushed the throw aside, and planted his feet on the bedroom floor.

"Yeah, well," he said with a hard laugh. "What else is new?”

“Were you dreaming?”

“I guess so”, he said. “Dreams are stupid things, aren't they? Just a bunch of stuff your brain throws up like it’s randomly pulling weird files out of a drawer. Maybe I shouldn't eat yoghurt-covered pickles before I go to bed."

"Do you want to talk about it?" asked Fluttershy softly.

"No, no no...I'm fine. I just need some coffee in me, is all." He snapped his fingers and was suddenly wearing his pink bathrobe.

He quickly opened the door to the galley and started boiling the coffee pot. As he let go of the handle he realized he was shaking.

Dammit.

He looked back over his shoulder. Fluttershy had not followed him. Maybe she had gotten the message that he needed to be alone, and he certainly didn't need to go back there and nuzzle up against her. Certainly not. He couldn't let her know how much he needed her. He just couldn't. The last time he had done that he had learnt that it didn't matter how much you needed someone--you were always expendable. He'd had the chaos sucked out of his body and he had been cast aside like an empty pea pod. Chaos was his only great love, really. It never questioned him or told him what he did was wrong or told him there were rules that had to be obeyed. All it did was exist and blossom. And it wasn't going to leave him, like everyone inevitably did.

Next door was a beautiful, kind mare who wanted to be his friend, but how long would that last? He was always screwing up, and he knew he was damn lucky she hadn't cut off contact with him after Tirek. Further complicating the issue were the non-platonic feelings he held for Fluttershy, so if she rejected his friendship it would hurt all the more. Fluttershy was only a pony; eventually everyone had a breaking point and he was sure at some point he would find it and ruin everything.

The coffee pot finished boiling and he stared at it as if he wasn't sure what the appliance was for. Minutes passed, and he hadn't moved.

He was lost in thought as he remembered the dream, which was partly based on a real memory.

It had been a crisp Autumn day in Ponyville. The leaves were starting to turn and fall and everything looked orange and red and yellow.

Fluttershy had insisted they go for a walk to look at the colours.

Normally Discord would have been up for enjoying looking at nature, but he would have preferred something more exciting, like a lion chasing its prey or a hurricane.

Plus it was cold. And he took every possible opportunity to mention it to her.

"It's freezing, Fluttershy," he whined. He had a long scarf wrapped around and around the length of his neck, a woollen hat covering his antlered and horned head, a coat and mittens. Fluttershy wore ear muffs, a scarf a sweater and winter boots.

"It's quite warm for late October," she said.

"I think we differ on what 'warm' is, said Discord, exaggerating the chattering noise his teeth were making.

“But it’s so beautiful, isn’t it?” said Fluttershy.

“Seen ten thousand Falls, seen them all,” muttered Discord. “And yet somepony still decided we should have a picnic in the park at this time of year. Everyone else seems to have done the sensible thing and stayed home.”

She looked over her shoulder and gave him a smile that he could only think of as “cheeky.”

“Since when do you care about what’s sensible?” she said.

He had to chuckle at that. “Okay, you’ve got me pegged there, Fluttershy.”

“Is there anything you like about the Autumn? I love the way the colours change and nothing stays the same. Almost wistful.”

He said nothing. He realized he was staring at her and cleared his throat.

“Well,” he said mischievously, “there are some things I do still like about Fall.”

“Such as?”

“Well, let me see. I do quite like the idea of Nightmare Night, though that didn’t exist before I got changed into a pigeon’s pooping perch. Some advice for you, Fluttershy: If you ever get turned to stone make sure not have your mouth open when it’s happening. However, back to Nightmare Night. I must say it’s one tradition you ponies came up with that appeals to moi. An entire night of playing pranks on ponies! Absolutely brilliant. I can’t wait until next week. Who do you think I should dress up as? I bet it would be a hoot if I went as Sparky.”

He suddenly changed shape before Fluttershy so that he looked like a facsimilie of the alicorn Princess with a giant crown on her head.

“Hello, my name is Twilight Sparkle,” he said in a mock sing-song parody of her voice. “And I’m a Princess and I’m so emo because being a Princess doesn’t amount to much, Waaah.”

“I…find Nightmare Night kind of scary,” she said.

Discord tittered as he flashed back into his usual form. “Ah, so there are some things about Fall that you’re not keen on either. Why is that? What is there to be afraid of? It’s just a bunch of ponies in masks making fun of Luna…and Twilight.” He rubbed his hands together in glee at the thought.

“It’s not quite like that…”

“I like to see it that way. But seriously, Fluttershy. Not sure why Nightmare Night seems so scary when you have me standing right here.”

“You…you’re not scary.”

There was a pause as he regarded her. No pony had ever said that to him. It was true that Celestia didn’t seem to find him scary but she had never said so in so many words. Furthermore, he was sure he had become a scary visage to her when he had brought chaos to Equestria. He tried not to think of the way swarms of locusts had eaten all the ponies’ crops and the hard, cold looks Celestia and Luna had given him before they turned him to stone.

“There is one other thing I like about Fall,” he said, trying to change the subject slightly. He dropped down on all fours and lowered his body slightly.

“Oh? What’s that?”

“Well…it’s…” his body tensed and she realized what was going to happen before he shouted, “COMPLICATED!” and lunged for her. He teleported as he grabbed her so that they were 5 feet above a leaf pile someone had raked up earlier and then they plummeted into it.

Fluttershy’s initial terror at the surprise teleport gave way to relief and heady adrenaline as the soft leaf pile cushioned their fall.

“Besides, it’s much warmer inside this leaf pile,” said Discord.

She shrieked with laughter as his beard tickled her. Discord was laughing, and leaves were falling everywhere—into his mouth, into Fluttershy’s mane.

She laughed harder as she heard him trying to spit leaves out. By the time he had removed the last of the bits from his teeth, she was in hysterics.

Then everything was suddenly very still.

His arms wrapped around her slender frame. "Yup, it's much warmer in here," he said grinning. He looked down at her. Her head was poking out of a blanket of multi-coloured leaves and she smiled.

The small mare was leaning against his chest now and her eyes were closed.

She wasn't afraid of him. Come to think of it, she had never been afraid of him. Not once, not even in the maze.  He liked that about her.

"Fluttershy, have you ever been to Horsetralia?"

"Discord?"

He looked up suddenly.

"You've been holding that coffee pot for over a minute."

He quickly poured himself a cup and walked past her, quickly trying to forget the bittersweet memory.

"We should continue our search," he said.

Twilight, Starswirl and the rest of the team minus Spike were back at the portal in the morning. Thankfully this time it didn’t seem to show any signs of disappearing. However, they were still all at a quandary as to how to explore it without being in extreme danger.

“Who knows what’s on the other side,” said Starswirl. “And how do we get back through once we’re there? I should have asked Discord to make the teleportation spell in duplicate.”

“Well he probably did that on purpose, didn’t he?” said Scriptum. “It’s just the sort of sneaky thing he would do from what you’ve told me.”

Starswirl sighed. He had really hoped Discord had learnt from his past mistakes. Perhaps he would never learn.

Twilight was quiet through the whole exchange. There was something not quite right about this whole scenario and she couldn’t put her hoof on why. It was true that Discord often thought ahead in the manner of a master chess player when he was scheming. She had seen that first hand when he had hid the Elements after breaking free from his stone prison, and once again when he had eaten all the reformation spells out of the books in her library. But when it came to things that made Discord emotional, all planning and scheming seemed to fall out the window. He just seemed to do whatever he could to make sure he could satisfy that emotion.

On the other hoof, perhaps that was exactly what was happening here. He had horsenapped Fluttershy because he wanted her to love him. But still..but still…

“It’s exactly the sort of thing he would do,” continued Scriptum. “Put his dirty old man talons on her. I mean, isn’t he the oldest being in Equestria? Disgusting.”

Starswirl looked up sharply.

“And just what,” he said, “is wrong with being an ‘old man’?”

Scriptum suddenly looked sheepish. “Nothing. I…didn’t mean it that way. I didn’t mean you…”

But Starswirl was already moving off to examine the portal again.

“Are you super sure with sugar on top that there are no spells in your books about travelling through that thing?” said Pinkie. Starswirl was amazed at how perky she seemed in the mornings, and without coffee too.

“Quite sure, Pinkie. There are many books on inter-dimensional travel but this is something wholly different. If only there was a way we could get through and be sure we could come back out again intact.”

“Well of course there is, silly,” said Pinkie.

Everyone looked at her as if she had sprouted two more pairs of legs and was walking around like a giant Pinkie Spider.

“What are you talking about?” said Starswirl.

“Yeah Pinkie,” interjected Applejack. “If Twilight an’ Starswirl can’t figure this out then how in the hay are we s’possed to just walk into that thing and come back alive?”

“That’s part of it,” said Pinkie in her singsong voice.

“What’s part of it?” asked Twilight. “Just walking in?”

Pinkie nodded so quickly it almost looked like her head was vibrating.“But you have to have a trail to get back.”

“Trail? Like a breadcrumb trail?” scoffed Scriptum with barely disguised disdain. This pink pony really was stupid, not to mention shrill and annoying. He wondered how a quiet beauty like Fluttershy could ever be friends with someone that loud.

“No, silly!” said Pinkie as though she hadn’t heard the malice in his voice. “I mean it’s like when you go into a maze. You tie a piece of string around yourself so you can find your way back out again.”

Starswirl looked at her.

“All we need to do is find some string or rope and one of us can go in and look around and the others can pull them back out again when the pony going in tugs on the rope.”

Starswirl was still staring at her with his mouth hanging open.

Scriptum sneered at her. “Pinkie,” he began. “That’s…”

“…Genius!” Starswirl finished for him. “It’s so blindingly obvious and yet none of us thought of it!”

“Do you think it will work?” asked Twilight.

“There’s only one way to be sure. Applejack, you and Rarity see if you can find some rope. The rest of you come with me…”

Discord spent much of his day in the crow’s nest. They had decided to scout up and down the various riverlets with Fluttershy looking from the bow as the boat moved along, and Discord scanning the distance. The draconequus couldn’t help but feel like they were searching for a horseshoe in a haystack. The dimension was vast, and ever changing and they still weren’t entirely certain that the jelly creature was in this particular dimension.

It felt hopeless.

Just like the situation with her is hopeless.

Discord felt like punching himself. He really didn’t want to be thinking about that right now. He hated it when he started becoming depressed.

But wait? Why was he becoming depressed? She was here, and she still cared about him, didn’t she? He took comfort in that. He took further comfort in the idea that she was away from Scriptum. He felt a bitter ache in his heart as he remembered how excited her words to him on the species sheet were. Except they hadn’t been for him. They had been for the unicorn.

The unicorn that had hurt her.

Scriptum had hurt her, he had crushed her wings and possibly her spirit as well. She wouldn’t go back to him. He had done something horrible to her.

Then a distant tendril in his mind brought forth the thought: You hurt her too.

No! He hadn’t. He would never hurt Fluttershy. He would never lay a destructive paw on her lovely wings or physically assault her in any way.

No, you just found another way to hurt her. One that was possibly far more devastating and disgusting.

Discord winced.

And so, his mind continued. If she’s forgiven you that transgression, then who’s to say that she wouldn’t forgive his milder one? After all, she had feelings for him. She never did for you.

Discord kicked the side of the crow’s nest hard with his goat leg.

“Shut up,” he said to his thoughts with gritted teeth.

They did. For now.

He watched a pair of sky whales glide past, their eyes on stalks looking in different directions for the tiny creature they fed on. Then his eyes moved down to the Pegasus at the bow of the ship.

Her mane was blowing in the breeze and it was illuminated by the light given off by the electrical impulses and fractal shapes floating past them. She looked up at the sky whales and spotted him. She smiled and waved.

He gave her a forced grin and waved back. He wished to chaos that he had never betrayed her to Tirek. What an utter fool he had been. Tricked! Tricked because he felt he needed someone. Perhaps it was better not to need anyone.

He was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of her soft voice calling him down for lunch. He sighed and began walking down a spiral staircase he had created. He didn’t want to teleport right away. Perhaps walking down the stairs would give him some time to sort out his mood.

Fluttershy had made sandwiches in the galley and they sat on a picnic blanket.

Discord ate his sandwich in unusual silence.

Finally Fluttershy spoke. “You seem very quiet, Discord.”

“I’m just tired, Noodle,” he said to her. “It’s kind of hard for me to concentrate so much on one thing at a time.”

She nodded. “I’ve been feeling tired too, to be honest. I feel like sleeping during the day.”

He looked at her. She did look a little peaky.

“And at night?”

“At night it’s not so bad. It just feels like a normal Equestrian night. But in the day I can see everything moving and twisting and changing and I feel…not quite right.”

Discord realized the chaos dimension was starting to get to her. He was fine in his own domain, but Fluttershy’s internal functions such as her circadian rhythm were no doubt struggling to right themselves. Not only did the dimension seem to have no horizon, but without his magic it would have been impossible for Fluttershy to tell which way was up. Time also flowed differently here than it did back in the dimension the ponies lived in.

They really needed to find the monster so he could get her back home safely.

He noted Fluttershy hadn’t finished her sandwich.

“Hey, Flutters,” he said, “why don’t you go take a nap. I can take it from here.”

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “I want to help. We have to find this thing.”

He looked at her, concerned. “I think you need to sleep. Maybe if you rest up you’ll be able to search better.”

She looked doubtful.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got it covered,” he said to her. “And if you want, we can go over the species sheets in the evenings, and you can help me lay them out before we send them back.”

She thought about his suggestion. It sounded nice; she could rest and she would still be able to be useful in the evenings. She suddenly realized just how tired she felt and a yawn escaped her.

Discord patted her on the head with his paw.

“Go snooze, Flutter Nutter” he said. “Or I might have to sing you to sleep and believe me you wouldn’t want that.” He grinned.

Rainbow Dash had volunteered to go into the chaos dimension first, but Pinkie had insisted that two of them should go instead in case one needed to help the other out should some unforeseen situation arise. Since they were going into a chaos dimension that was highly likely.

“Remember to tug on the rope three times if you’re in danger at any point,” said Starswirl. “No hesitation. Do it quickly. And even if you see Discord and Fluttershy, if you’re in immediate danger you pull that rope instantly! The rest you keep a watchful eye on the rope. No slacking. Once Dash and Pinkie return we can figure out what to do next.”

They had tested the method using an old ponyquin. When they had pulled it back into their dimension the ponyquin had been intact.

“Good job, Buster!” Pinkie said to the ponyquin.

Scriptum rolled his eyes. Only Pinkie would decide to name a dummy.

Rainbow Dash’s heart was pounding. She knew her friends viewed her as the bravest of them, but the swirling vortex looked extremely ominous. There was even a low, creepy humming sound coming from it. And what lay on the other side? She hadn’t even been to Discord’s house, let alone the dimension itself. She knew it was full of strange creatures from what Fluttershy had told her, but what else? And were any of these creatures dangerous?

Pinkie on the other hand seemed raring to go.

“Oh boy!” she said. “I’ve never been through one of these!”

“None of us have, Pinkie, dear,” said Rarity.

“Right, enough lollygagging,” said Starswirl. “I think it’s time. Everyone ready?”

Pinkie and Dash moved forward slowly as the others started to give the rope some slack. Dash tentatively poked the membrane of the vortex with her hoof, then, taking a deep breath, poked her hoof through and pulled it back out again quickly. It looked intact.

She and Pinkie gave each other a look.

“On the count of three?” said the earth pony.

Dash nodded.

“One…two….three!”

They both jumped through the membrane, with Pinkie diving through in a cannonball pose.

Rainbow Dash realized she had instinctively shut her eyes as she dived into the portal. With great trepidation, she forced herself to open them and gasped.

All around them was what looked like static electricity. A huge beast with hundreds of eyes and flippers like a walrus floated past, each of its eyes giving the pair of ponies a look as it went by without giving the ponies any further thought. Rainbow tried to look up, then realized she didn’t know which way up was.

“Woooow…” Pinkie was saying. “It’s kinda sorta like being back in my mom!”

“What?!”

Dash had barely registered what the heck Pinkie was saying. She tried to right herself. Her heart was pounding. That monster hadn’t seemed interested in them, but who could say whether others might not be?

“Pinkie!” said Dash. “I think we should go back now!”

“Are you sure? Do you think we have enough information?”

“We aren’t dead yet. I think that’s pretty useful information.”

“Okie Dokie Loki!” said Pinkie. She pulled a notebook out of her mane and wrote the words “not dead” on the first page.

The two ponies tugged on their ropes and were suddenly jerked back through the membrane. They landed in a pile on top of their friends.

“Well?” said Starswirl.

“I wanna go again! I wanna go again!” shouted Pinkie.

As darkness fell, Discord slid down the ship’s mast like it was a fireman’s pole. He hit the deck of the ship with a thump and heard a soft whimper.

“Fluttershy?” he asked.

“I heard a noise,” came the voice from his room.

“That was just me,” he said. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“It’s okay,” she said. “I’m supposed to be helping you with the species sheets at night, remember?”

“I remember,” he said. “But first we must dine! You wait right there.”

Fluttershy sat on the doorstep of her bedroom while Discord rummaged in the galley. She did feel a little better after her nap, and the sapphire flies had started their nightly dance.

Once Discord had found some plates, he didn’t bother cooking; he simply snapped his fingers and some haydogs smothered in onions appeared on a plate.

“Le hay dog mademoiselle,” he said, appearing next to Fluttershy in a waiter’s outfit.

She giggled softly. “Thank you,” she said, taking the plate from his talon. “I’m actually famished.”

“No, you’re actually Fluttershy,” he said, bracing himself as she gave him her trademark withering look reserved for awful jokes.

She shook her head and groaned. Discord liked deliberately bad, annoying puns and jokes, probably because they mainly annoyed people. Fluttershy simply found his mischief, rather than the actual terrible jokes amusing.

Discord was uncharacteristically quiet again as they ate their haydogs in silence. There was something he wanted to ask her, but he worried it wasn’t the right thing to say.

“Soooo,” said Discord after a while. “What’s gonna happen when we get back?”

“Well we have to find the monster first.”

“Well, yes. I know that, but I mean…do you want me to do anything about Scriptum?”

Her eyes widened. “No, Discord. You should leave him alone. We need to concentrate on getting the creature to Twilight and Starswirl so they can find a cure for the pony in hospital. I haven’t decided what to do about Scriptum yet.”

She meant she hadn’t decided how to tell the others that he had hurt her, but Discord interpreted her words differently.

Oh, no, he thought.

Well, what did he expect, really? And what right did he have to say anything? Of course, that didn’t stop him.

“Fluttershy,” he said. “I don’t understand how he hurt your wings.”

“He was trying to hold me back. Like I said, I wanted to come and see you and make sure you were alright.”

His heart tugged in his chest. She had been concerned about his welfare. He felt a bit stunned by this information; she had just had her wings crushed and broken against her body and she had been worried about him.

She had known how much he hurt. He suddenly felt panic grip him.

“I was…fine, Flutter Nutter. Really. I was just going through the species sheets and was just about to set off to find the monster when I heard you outside my door. Good thing too, if you hadn’t called out I might have missed you. Besides, why worry about me? I live here.”

“That’s not what I was worried about,” she said softly. “Starswirl…he…He told us about what happened to you in the past.”

Discord’s colour drained from his face under his fur.

“He had no right to do that!” he said.

“He was worried about you! And I didn’t mean to hear the conversation. He had been talking to Twilight.”

“Oh, so he said private things to Twilight, then? Yes, that’s so much better.”

Fluttershy tried to ignore his snarky tone.

“He was worried about you thinking we had abandoned you all. I just want you to know I wouldn’t abandon you.”

Discord laughed a little too hard. “Oh, Flutters. Do you really think I’ve spent the past few days moping to myself? I’ve been working on this project. This project to study the taxonomy of this dimension, and if I can find that jelly beast in the process, well so be it.”

“Why did you start this project in the first place?” said Fluttershy.

For you.

“Just on a whim,” he said. “You know how it is. After all, I am the foremost authority on magical creatures, despite what others might think.”

She knew he was talking about Tree Hugger, and she suddenly saw through him.

“Discord, you didn’t need to start this project to prove yourself.”

“What on earth are you rambling about, Flutter Nutter? I just said I wanted to advance the frontiers of magic and science. Not all magic has to be clinical and practiced. There are things worth reading besides what Celestia and Luna teach you.”

“Discord, this is a really big project, and while I’m glad it exists, because it means we can work on finding a cure for that pony, I’m concerned that you did this because you felt you had something to prove.”

“Well, I do! I need to prove to you lot that chaos fauna is worth studying.”

“Specifically chaos fauna, not chaos magic.”

“Little from column A and little from column B,” he retorted.

Fluttershy looked at him steadily. “Look me in the eye and tell me the real reason you did this.”

He met her gaze and winced and looked at the ground after about 10 seconds.

“I knew it! Discord, what is this about?”

“It’s! It’s nothing bad…” he said. “I just…need…” he stopped himself in time before his heart run off with his mouth.

“…needed to show you that I was capable of doing something for you.”

“You shouldn’t do things just to prove yourself to me.”

“Why not?”

“Don’t misunderstand me,” she said softly. “I don’t mean it’s wrong to need…um. I mean I don’t mean it’s wrong to want to do things to help others, I just mean you can't just...rely on me to fix everything."

“Fix everything?”

“You can’t invest everything in me, Discord.”

She knew. As always she was able to see straight through him every time.

"You're all I've got,” he said.

"You know that's not true!"

"Fluttershy, the others don't like me. They merely tolerate me, and I know it. I know Twilight thinks I'm selfish."

“You can be selfish,” she said and he winced a little at her bluntness, but it was softened when she continued, “everyone can be selfish sometimes. No one is perfect. I’m sure Twilight didn’t mean it the way you think.”

He snorted. “I’m sure she did after Starswirl airing my dirty laundry for all and sundry to pass judgement on.”

“We still all want to be your friend, Discord. Please don’t think otherwise.”

“They want to be my friend now. But wait until I screw up again, Fluttershy. They’ll all turn into ice ponies again. It’s like I take one step forward and four steps back.” His legs detached from his body and did a little back and forth to illustrate his point.

"It’s not entirely up to my friends to make the effort. You have to try too. It’s a two way street. Besides,” she continued softly, “like I said, you can’t invest everything in me. It isn’t fair on either of us.”

“Why?”

"Discord, I won't always be here."

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. My lifespan is shorter than yours."

Discord fought back a groan. He didn't want to think about that right now. He tried very hard not to think about that particular topic, and he remembered how terrified he had felt when he thought he had lost her to the monster. But he was going to lose her anyway, wasn’t he? At some point down the line he would. And then what?

He whispered: "That's what I mean. When you're gone, I won't have your friendship anymore."

"All the more reason to start making new friendships," she said. "Discord, I'm saying this because I want you to be happy. You deserve to have lots of friends and be happy."

He thought of Tirek, and the look on Fluttershy's tear-stained face as he stomped all over her heart that day.

"Do I?"

She looked at him sadly.

“Please don’t hate yourself, Discord.”

“Why are you so…”

But he never finished his sentence, because he was suddenly hit in the face by a huge black blob.

Fluttershy screamed.

Discord struggled for air. One minute he had been about to ask Fluttershy why she was so patient and caring and kind to him of all people, then he felt a wet mass on his face and he felt like he was suffocating. He was suffocating.

He thrashed about on the deck of the ship, trying to free his face. He could hear Fluttershy yelling and he felt sharp objects dig into his neck. In panic, he reached up and tried to get a grip on whatever the squishy thing on his face was and dug his lion claws and eagle talons into it.

The creature released its grip on his face momentarily as if it was taking its own gasp of air. Discord took the opportunity to whack it straight in the face with a blast of kinetic energy. The creature squealed as it hit the deck, but was quickly upright again.

Discord got his first good look at it since he had last seen the thing. It had a single eye in the middle of where he guessed its head was, but for the most part it looked like a shapeless black blob, and not a shiny, changing kind of black like a raven’s feather. It was more like it was made of nothing. It wasn’t even transparent the way other jelly creatures like the Smooze were. Instead he could see nothing behind it through its wet skin. It did, however, have three pairs of sharp clawed legs.

Now that Discord had a better visual lock on his opponent, he started to feel more confident about what to do. The creature hissed at him. It seemed to be unaware of Fluttershy or was ignoring her as she yelled at it to stay away from her friend.

Discord lunged for the creature, throwing another ball of energy its way. He was surprised to feel the thing put up a tremendous fight. Usually Discord could overpower anything with his magic fairly quickly but this thing was thrashing like mad.

He tightened his hold on the creature and used the energy to hold the creature firmly down on deck. It was like trying to hold onto a slippery, flopping fish.

“Keep still!” he yelled out loud at the thing. Suddenly it shot out of his grasp like a slippery eel and quickly moved to the other side of the ship.

For a second he thought it was about to escape and he panicked, but suddenly the creature came at him at lightning speed. To his other horror it seemed bigger somehow. Its face formed the same strange funnel shape it had when it had been attacking the sky whale. Discord didn’t have time to dodge; the thing was on his face again.

He suddenly felt ice cold as if something had gripped hold of his magical centre and his heart at the same time. He tried crying out but could only make strangled or muffled noises.

Then there was a smacking sound and the tendrils uncoiled from his chest and face and he could breathe again.

He struggled to sit upright and saw Fluttershy standing over the creature with a frying pan in her hooves.

She had tears in her eyes.

“I don’t like hurting things,” she said.

“It was trying to tear my face off!” said Discord. But he softened when he saw how frightened she looked.

They both approached the creature. It wasn’t moving.

“Not taking any chances this time,” said Discord. He placed the thing in a glass jar again, but this time sealed the area around it with a binding spell. He wasn’t keen on binding spells. He wasn’t keen on anything that even remotely resembled what had happened with him and the statue, but in this case he had no choice.

Then as he got his breathing back under control and the adrenaline made him shaky on his feet, he realized what they had done.

“Fluttershy…we. We caught it!”

“We did!” she said in wonder.

Discord started laughing then he did a little jig on top of the creatures jar.

“We caught it!” he practically sang. “Nyah nyah nyah!” He thumbed his nose at the trapped creature.

“We have to take it back!”

“Right away, Madam,” said the draconequus with flourish, bowing to her. “I’ll just teleport us on out of here!”

He snapped his fingers.

Nothing happened.

“Whu? Must have misfired,” he said. “Just a sec.”

He focused. Ponyville he thought, and he snapped his fingers again.

Fluttershy was still standing before him on the boat. She blinked at him.

“What the hell?” growled Discord. Terror gripped him as he imagined the worst case scenario, and he quickly snapped his fingers so that flowers sprouted all over the deck of the ship. Then he snapped his fingers again and they disappeared. Next he jumped up and floated above the ship, then returned to the floor to join Fluttershy.

“My magic seems to be working but I can’t teleport,” he said.

“Why?”

“I don’t know! That…that thing must have done it!” His hackles rose as he stared at it and he instinctively bared his teeth at it.

“How do we get home?”

He thought for a minute. “We could just go back the same way we came, but it doesn’t buy us much time, unfortunately. We can travel a little faster as we won’t be looking for what we have anymore, but it’s not ideal.” He snapped his fingers one more time to test teleportation. Nothing. He groaned.

“We’ll have to set off immediately,” he said to her.

She nodded. “Let’s turn this thing around and go home!”

Home he thought. Home was back where Scriptum was. The euphoria he initially had at catching the creature suddenly began to fade. He was taking her back to him.

Perhaps his faulty magic wasn’t an entirely bad thing after all, if he got to spend more time with her…before she went back to him.

Scriptum had returned to the castle with the excuse that he needed to do more work on the species sheets. This was partly true. Despite his working round the clock he felt like he hadn’t made a dent in the workload the draconequus had sent through. It was ridiculous. He felt like he was working under a mountain of paper.

Still, at least it seemed like they were closer to getting Fluttershy back from that freakish monster. Scriptum briefly entertained the idea of writing his own species sheet for Discord:

**Discord: Draconequus.* Smelly, beastly, haphazard, evil ruler of chaos dimension. Is incredibly selfish and likes stick his snout where he isn’t wanted. Once terrorized Equestria. Remarkably ugly thing too. Probably a pervert, since he doesn’t appear to stick to his own species and instead spends his time eyeing up mares.*

He suddenly wanted Fluttershy back badly. If Discord was that touchy feely with her in public then what the hell was he doing now?

She wouldn’t tolerate it, though? Would she? Would the fact that she didn’t want him touching her mean that would stop him though?

He shuddered. He could hear rain hammering down on the roof of the library wing.

“’Sup?”

Scriptum jumped at the sound of Spike’s voice.

“Oh, it’s just you, Spike.”

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” said the dragon. “I know it can feel a bit creepy in here at night, especially when it’s stormy outside.”

Scriptum regarded Spike for a moment then said: “Spike, you appear to be a dragon of the world.”

“I do?” Spike puffed out his chest and then said “uh…I mean, I do.”

“Precisely my point. I want to ask your advice on something.”

“Fire away,” said Spike, pleased to be asked for his opinion on something for once.

“Do you think Discord would hurt Fluttershy?”

Spike was surprised at the question. It seemed to be quite a heavy one, but after a short pause he replied.

“To be honest, no. I don’t think he would. He loves her, you know.”

Scriptum could feel his teeth setting hard behind his lips at the dragon’s innocent bluntness.

“Oh?” he said innocently.

“Yeah. I mean, you don’t have to worry about that or anything. She doesn’t have feelings for him.” He suddenly felt very sad as he thought of Rarity. Spike knew he wasn’t a grown up draconian like Discord, but he couldn’t help but feel slight empathy for the draconequus.

Scriptum managed to hide his pleasure at this information. He didn’t want anyone to think there was no urgency in getting Fluttershy back.

“But Spike,” he drawled. “You do know that one of the reasons Discord plunged Equestria into chaos was because a mare didn’t love him?”

“Really? Which mare?”

“Princess Celestia.”

The little dragon looked shocked. Obviously he hadn’t been told about Discord and the Princess’ past.

“That was why she imprisoned him in stone,” continued Scriptum. “Because he selfishly wanted the world to suffer for what he couldn’t have. He was a monster, Spike. And possibly still is. This is what he’s like when he wants something. I…I am very concerned for Fluttershy’s safety.” He looked pained.

“Geeze, when you put it like that it does make Discord sound scary,” said Spike. He now felt scared for Fluttershy’s safety as well.

“This is why we all need to make sure we find her as soon as possible. Then we might need to go to Princess Celestia and Luna and ask them where to go from there, but I suspect horsenapping carries a heavy punishment in Equestria.”

“It does,” said Spike. “I had to read up on Equestrian law for a project Twilight was working on once. It was soooo boring, did you know that according to Code IV, appendix 3a…”

“Spike,” interrupted Scriptum. “I think we should send a letter to Princess Celestia immediately and ask if she can offer any help.”

“Really? I mean, Twilight’s a Princess now so maybe we should go talk to her…”

“It’s really not my place to say, but I fear this may be beyond Twilight’s reach. I mean, we’ve only just managed to breach the chaos dimension. The others are still working on how we’re going to travel in it. I think we need someone who has thousands of years of experience, and I mean someone who isn’t Discord.”

“Y—you’re right,” said Spike. “Okay, you dictate the letter, and I’ll write it and send it off.” He found a quill and parchment and climbed up on a stool next to Scriptum. It felt good to feel needed.

“I knew you’d see it my way, Spike,” said S criptum, putting his hoof around the little dragon and rubbing his head. “After all, you’re a dragon of the world.”

Fluttershy noticed that Discord seemed subdued on the journey back. Since he no longer needed to search for anything, he spent most of his time at the bow instead of the crow’s nest. His tail was wrapped tightly around the jar containing the jelly monster, and every now and again he gave it a suspicious look, but mostly he looked a little sad as he looked out across the dimension that was his home.

As dawn approached, Fluttershy could see the crackling energy and light in the distance and she decided she should probably bed down for the day.

The problem was she didn’t feel tired. She wondered if sleeping during the evenings had disturbed her circadian rhythm even more. If anything she felt fidgety, as if she was brimming with energy. Perhaps it was the excitement and terror they had both experienced when they had fought and captured the creature. She sighed and closed the door to her bedroom before giving her friend one final look through the blinds, then she lay down on the bed and closed her eyes, wondering why she didn’t feel like sleeping at all.

Discord was in a funk.

He wished he could stop himself feeling the way he did. He really had no right to tell Fluttershy who she could and couldn’t love. Every time his mind told him that Scriptum had hurt her, a smaller internal voice pointed out that so had he.

He couldn’t see any way out of his dilemma.

All he did for the rest of the day was eye the unconscious monster suspiciously and tap the glass with his talon to test its robustness. There was no way this thing was escaping his clutches again.

A couple of times he nodded off at the bow and woke up with a start, ready to panic, but the creature remained still and contained within its jar.

The third time he nodded off he woke up with a snort when he felt a hoof lightly tapping on his back.

“Oh, hey Fluttershy,” he said. Part of him hated that he was instantly delighted to see her.

“Are you alright?” she asked softly.

“Never better. I almost got my face sucked off by Mister Hoover here. How are you holding up?”

I feel restless, she thought, but she didn’t say so. “I’m okay,” she said quietly.

He tilted his head and his ears pricked forward. “Then why do you look sad, Noodle?”

“I…I was thinking about our conversation earlier. I didn’t mean to be so harsh with you. I…just don’t want to hurt you again.”

He felt the attempts he had been making to freeze his heart melt at her soft voice.

“You didn’t hurt me,” he said softly. “It was a misunderstanding. I know you weren’t trying to make me feel bad.”

“I just want you to be happy. You’re my friend, Discord and I really care a lot about you. I hope you believe me.”

He felt himself melt further. “’Course I believe you, Fluttershy.” He sighed. “You’re probably right, you know. I…I should try and be nicer to Sparky and Co. Truth is I do like your friends, but I assume they don’t like me at all, so I don’t want them to know I like them because then they hold all the cards. Know what I mean?”

She did. “We won’t abandon you, Discord. I’m just sorry I’ve been such a bad friend.”

He looked at her like she had just told him she wanted to electrocute a field mouse.

“Come again?” he said.

“I was trying to be with someone who wouldn’t hurt me,” she said. “But Scriptum wasn’t a nice pony after all. I’m just afraid nice people might want to hurt me for a reason. What’s wrong with me, Discord?”

He was shocked.

“Fluttershy…”

He could see tears falling down her muzzle now.

“Is there something wrong with me, because I’d really like to know what it is I’m doing wrong?”

“Hey,” he said softly. “No, none of that.” He waved his paw and tear-drinking moths appeared and lapped the liquid off her face. With another wave of his paw they were gone.

“Am I a bad pony?” she sobbed.

“Look at me, Fluttershy,” he said.

"When you've lived as long as I have, Fluttershy, you start to realize there are no defined lines between nice and not nice, or good and bad, or virtuous and evil, or harmonious and disharmonious. All those things actually do, is overlap. Like Chaos- so many ponies want to believe it's pure evil, and it's not. No one appreciates it for what it is. It's not a purely good or purely bad force, nothing is pure bad or good. Not even the Elements of Harmony."

Fluttershy nodded, lost in thought.

"I guess, what I'm trying to say Fluttershy, is 'nice' isn't always 'nice.' It's how you react to things. I know I'm not a good pony, I get that, but...I hope you don't think I'm a bad pony either."

He looked at the ground then felt her hoof on the side of his face, softly stroking him. His eyes closed and his ears flattened.

“I don’t think you’re a bad pony at all,” she whispered.

"Fluttershy," he said.

"Yes?"

" The unequivocal answer is: No, Fluttershy. You are not a bad person. Don't you EVER think you're a bad person. Me...I'm...I thought I found someone who understood me and I was wrong, and I hurt you because I thought Tirek wanted my friendship."

Because I thought Tirek needed me and I wanted to be needed back.

He put his paw and claw on her shoulders as he faced her.

"That's what someone who is not a good pony would do, Fluttershy, though to be honest, as I said, when you've lived as long as I have you realize that 'good' and 'evil' are arbituary terms. Nothing is purely good or purely evil; it's more like an overlapping tapestry. This is true of everything and everyone. Even harmony isn't purely good, despite what many ponies think. But...you?  Fluttershy, you saved me. Twice. You… you're as close to good as possible so don't you ever think otherwise."

There was silence for a moment, then Discord cleared his throat. He seemed almost embarrassed about how candid he had been with her. "Well," he said, getting up to go to make his way to the galley for a nightcap, “I suppose now that this hunk of blubber has been captured we should both try to get some sleep. No reason to stay up, we’ll just go where the tide is taking us and eventually we’ll be back in my neighbourhood.”

“Discord,” she said softly.

“Mmm?” he said, looking up at her. He did feel extremely exhausted.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome Flutter Nutter. Any time.”

“Good night, Discord,” she said and closed her bedroom door.

“G’night, Noodle.”

After pouring himself a drink and knocking it back, he stretched and yawned and climbed into his bed, burying his face in the soft pillows. Dear chaos, he needed sleep. He felt almost as if that thing had drained him of energy as well as stunted part of his magic.

Soon the draconequus was fast asleep as his body attempted to recuperate.

Fluttershy, on the other hand was wide awake. The restlessness she had earlier seemed to have increased and her conversation with Discord was still fresh in her mind.  She had thought Scriptum was nice, and in some ways he was. He was polite, well-spoken and seemed to be invested in the project.

But he wasn’t nice to her, and it seemed as if he didn’t even know her. And she had almost gone to bed with him. She rolled over onto her side and sighed. It felt hot in this room. She opened the window a tiny bit to let air in and lay back down on the bed, beginning to feel a little more comfortable.

Her thoughts drifted back to Discord. Her room was clean and airy now that the window was open, but she missed the way his bedsheets had smelled. His fur gave them a comforting scent that she wished she was breathing in right now.

She thought of a few days ago, when she had seen him climbing up the mast.There had been wiry strength in his body. He didn't always use it, because he could float or use magic to move around, but when he did, he looked flexible and he looked...attractive.

What would it be like to sleep with a dark, wiry chaos god?

She started at the thought.

What is wrong with you, Fluttershy? What kind of thought is that? You haven't even done it with a regular stallion and you're considering sleeping with an immortal chaos god that can warp the fabric of reality? Girl, you and I are going to have to have a serious talk when we get home.

She rolled over onto her stomach and her wings folded and unfolded across her back.

Except...except...it's kind of...exciting...

Surely that was just her hormones making her think things like that? Surely it didn't matter that his big, strong paw on her waist made her feel feminine and dainty...that his voice sounded velvety and dangerous when he wanted something?

She gave a little gasp as the thought made her body twinge. She suddenly understood why she was feeling restless and fidgety.

Her mind seemed adamant that it wanted her to focus on her observations of Discord’s wiry figure and smell. In fact, it seemed the more thoughts of that nature crept into her brain, the lighter she felt.

Is this a good idea?

Surely it didn’t matter that his smell was comforting. Lots of smells were comforting. The smell of hot cocoa was comforting, even the smell of Angel’s rabbit hutch was comforting because it reminded her of home.

The barrage of thoughts continued.

Surely it didn’t matter that his coat smelt like a rainstorm or that electrical burning in the air after a thunderstorm.

Surely it didn't matter that he thought she was the closest thing to good there was, that he made her feel like she was his world and he was revolving around it. That he made her feel like a person, not a mare that was only supposed to be nice and pretty.

That he loved her.

She lay there in the dark looking up at the ceiling.

Discord woke up when he heard the door to his bedroom click. He wasn't sure what time it was, and checking a timepiece would likely have not done any good, as time flowed differently in the chaos dimensions. His ears flexed as he listened for more sounds.

Silence. The sapphire flies outside created soft, blue reflections across his body and the bed as they glided past the window.

After a while of laying there in the darkness, he felt the other side of the bed press down and then felt an arm slip around his middle and the soft mane and head of Fluttershy resting on his chest.

"Hi," he whispered.

His heart was beating rapidly. He could feel her warm, light breath on his chest feathers and he swallowed, hard. He wasn't sure why, but this felt different to the time a few nights ago when they had shared a bed and he had held and comforted her.

Be a gentlecolt he told himself. He started to relax, then he felt Fluttershy nuzzling against his feathers and he gasped instinctively and sat bolt upright.

He could just about see her face in the dim, blue light.

"You can't do this," he whispered.

"Why?"

"Because I'll screw it up, Fluttershy. Not...the...er...I mean I'll screw us up. I always do, don't I?"

"I'm in heat, Discord."

His mouth fell open.

"What?" was all he could say.

"I'm in heat."

Discord's head was swimming. No wonder everything felt so different. He was obviously reacting to whatever her body was doing to him. And now he was busy fighting the urge to suddenly press her into the bed sheets and kiss her.

"Why are you telling me this?" he croaked, his mouth suddenly very dry.

"Because I want you."

I want you too. You have no idea how badly I want you.

He held up a claw and said "The very fact that you're in heat makes me pretty sure that you don't want me. I'm just readily available."

Very readily available his mind said, almost as if it was chuckling at him.

Then she was moving towards him, up his body so that her face was level with his.

"You're wrong," she whispered, in a voice that seemed to be doing delightful things to his nervous system. "Mares get to choose who they're with.I get to choose.”

Discord had pressed his own body flat against the bed. He was torn between his desire and the urge to run out of the room. He wanted Fluttershy very much, but what if she didn't really want this? He'd been wrong before when he assumed she had wanted him through the notes they had written on the species sheets.

Discord felt he should say something; Something suave and seductive.

"Hurrrgle," he blurted out.

Smooth, Discord. Smooth. He grinned sheepishly.

Her face was inches from his, and she had tilted her head and lowered her eyelids as if in expectation. Oh, how he wanted this--but Starswirl had told him not to get involved with any of the six girls.

Dammit, dammit, dammit.

The scent of her gossamer mane went up into his nostrils and he shivered. As if he was on autopilot, he ran one of the fingers of his paw along Fluttershy's lower lip. He was going to kiss her and he couldn't stop. He was selfish, he knew that.

Discord had awful willpower when it came to saying "no" to those who wanted him, but the fact that it was Fluttershy made things worse. His feelings for her were ridiculously strong and he was sure this was going to end in tears despite her brave move. However, he couldn't resist her. She felt good.

He could hardly remember the last time he had felt something this good.

Without further hesitation he crossed the short distance left between them and pressed his lips hungrily against hers. He felt her soft fore arms tighten around his neck and he ran his talon through her mane as their kissing became more intimate. The tempo of her breathing shot up, and it excited him. He pressed his lion paw firmly yet gently against her lower back, bringing her body closer to his, then he shifted and his mouth found her throat.

Fluttershy sighed. He was kissing and nibbling her neck tenderly and it sent little sparks of electricity through her body.

Discord was shaking a little. Starswirl's warning to him was fading away in the back of his mind with occassional glimpses of lucidity. It didn't last.

What am I doing...what am I...oooh, god. Fluttershy.

She had nipped him under his jawline and he was now completely lost. He growled. In one move he flipped them over so that she was on her back and he kissed her deeply as he pressed his body against hers and into the sheets.

The rough feeling of his feathery and scaly body against hers made Fluttershy feel as if her body had been set alight with need. She'd had heats before, but had spent them alone. She had never felt a male's body against hers so intimately and to her surprise, every touch from her friend felt simultaneously comfortable and exciting. Everything felt right…

"Fluttershy," he was whispering. "I need you..."

She arched her back as he began to explore her with his mouth.

Discord hadn't enjoyed such lovely chaotic sounds in ages.

Later they lay tangled up in each other, trying to catch their breaths. He rested his head on her chest and she stroked his mane tenderly. Discord couldn't help it- a soft bird like sound of contentment emerged from his throat. It was his version of a purr.

Fluttershy was strangely reminded of the clucking sound a parrot made when she petted it on the head, but the sound was also dove-like. She kissed the tip of his nose tenderly.

"Score," he whispered. She giggled softly.

"I...take it I was good then?" he asked, grinning.

She smiled and continued to stroke his mane.

"No complaints here."

He sighed and nuzzled the soft fur on her chest, and held her until he could hear the soft sounds of the pegasus sleeping.

Soon his mind began to do its usual dance of self-doubt. What had just happened had been unbelievable, and like many good things in his life, he started to worry that he was back in the statue and imagining things. Then he started to worry about things that might happen if by some blessed chance, this just happened to be reality and not a dream born of sensory-deprivation.

She’s…amazing. What if I screw it all up again? I mean, this moment...this moment right here is amazing. But what do I do now?

Then, for the first time in a very long time, his mind gave him very good advice:

Enjoy it.