⇩ Please Downvote! ⇩by Super TrampolineChaptersChapter 1: Applejack and the Large Number of ApplesChapter 3: Super Trampoline and the Idiosyncrasies of Prench hornChapter 4: Oh How the Mighty Have Fallen: A Hydra Fights Corruption Charges as a Batpony Fights Mary Sue ChargesChapter 6: It Ain't Easy Being SleazyChapter 7: Trixie Must Face the Realities of Her Place In LifeChapter 8: Rise of Shining Armor's Food Cart EmpireSpecial Guest Author Protopony350: Super Tramampoline gets spied on by a lesser pony who also wishes to put an end to Friday foreverChapter 9: Even Ponies As Awesome As Me Get Depressed Sometimes.Chapter 10: You Better Believe I've Got Trix Up My Sleeves, Except I Don't Have Sleeves.Chapter 11: Darn Luna, You Scary!Chapter 14: I Did the Thing Samurai Jack Wanted To Do But Never CouldChapter 15: Ain't No Rest For the LazyChapter 18: MEANWHILE...Chapter 19: WHEANMILE...Chapter 20: WHILEMEAN...Chapter 21: Something Happens and I'm Head Over HeelsChapter 24: Applejack Bakes BreadChapter 25: Applejack Faces Her InsecuritiesChapter 26.1Seeing someone treated respectfully by a parent left your character with a sense of respect. An act of dishonesty on the part of a mentor left your character feeling resentful and made your character decide to get even. Your character had many friends gThe Freedom FighterIf you don't Vote, downvoteChapter Twenty Eight: In Which Rainbow Dash is Sick and Applejack Bakes PieChapter 29: The Return of FlorgishmontumeridaphChapter 30: Sunset CuddlesBeginning of the Black and Red Alicorn OC Arc: Chapter 31: The Beginning of a PlotChapter 32: Back to the PastChapter 33: A Leave of Our Previous Plot To Talk About GardeningChapter 34: Applejack's EyebrowsChapter 35: The RainforestChapter Thirty Six: And Also The Major Antagonists.Chapter 37: The OCs That Time ForgotChapter 38: The ElderChapter 39: Meanwhile Back at the FarmChapter 40: The AttackChapter 41: The EscapeChapter 42: The Jungle Part 1Chapter 43: The Jungle Part 2Chapter 44: The Temple Part 1Chapter 45: The Temple Part 2Chapter 46: The Temple Part 3Chapter 47: Meanwhile, a Story About Cadance and Shining Armor and Coffee CreamerChapter 48: Back to the BattleChapter 49: Meanwhile, a Story About TrixieI Just Realized That There is Nothing Stopping Me From Updating This Story.Oh God, There is Nothing Stopping Me From Writing Literally ANYTHING I Want Here (As Long as It is Rated “Everyone”)!My Friend's Unamed OC Likes BroccoliA Short Chapter With Princess EmberBatponies Love MangosPoopNot a Good DayJust For Fun, I Wrote This Chapter With the Help of a Neural Network.The Shortest Chapter of This StoryStarlight Glimmer Introduces a Bit of Plot to This Whole MessNew Year, New TraditionsYou're Probably Wondering Why I've Gathered You All Here TodayUse 60 to insert the chapter number dynamicallySuper Trampoline Takes a NapSuper Trampoline Makes a PunAnnouncement:6464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464641711,486 681 3,573 Edit Publish 1 Formatting Chapter Title Use 65 to insert the chapter number dynamically. You can also add a number to the value such as 67 FILE FORMAT HELP SpApplejackOopsDoes Saying Rainbow Dash is Hot Bump the Rating of This From Everyone to Teen? I Hope Not, Because Rainbow Dash is Hot.DepressionOhRemember that K-Pop Song, Gee Gee Gee Gee Baby Baby?As Rarity Would Say, I love Being Covered in Maud!The Party Part 1The Quest, Part 1The Talk Part 1The Ponk Part 1The Bonk Part 1Chapter 78: The TalkThis Story is (For) Now Exactly 15,000 Words Long!Chapter 79: New HorizonsNow For a Birthday Chapter!!!"Crushed By Foals" by the dobermans: Guest Author Week Day 1“Infrastructure Week for My Infinite Marefriends (a.k.a. The Ride Literally Never Ends)” by Jay Bear v2: Guest Author Week Day 2"Bumblebeau Takes the Cake" by Bumblebeau: Guest Author Week Day 3Taking a Break From Guest Author Week Because Not That Many People Actually Submitted Guest ChaptersChapter 86: From Ladle to GraveChapter 87 Haha this is very clearly fiction and not at all based on what has actually been happening in my life over the last three days! Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter87 chapterTanka Week Day 1Tanka Day 2Celestia TankaTrenderhoof TankaRuby Pinch TankaShining Amor TankabIG mAC tANKATwilight drops a truth Tsar-BombaCuddlesChapter 989898989898Hey Cheerilee Cheerilee by Glaze and The Living Tombstone TankaStats Page generated in 0.076 seconds Total duration 0.376 seconds 1,165 users online 494,874 hits today, 1,554,714 yesterday • Site Statistics FIMFiction My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction Designed and coded by knighty & XaqusegOh Snap this must be the Hundredth Chapter! Because I used % i % to insert the chapter number dynamically and the result is: 101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101Chapter 102: I Cleaned My Room!Listen to Tower of Babel by Elton BonThis Chapter Contains a Slightly Strange Picture of Two Sandwiches I Made Today and Also a List of the Ingredients Contained Within Each Sandwich. Oh, and Also a Pizza Recommendation.Big Mac and I Make Out. Also, I'm Sad No One Commented On My Sandwiches :(((I hang out with Purple SmartHelp I'm Stuck in a Very Short Chapter!Follow & Support Us Support us PATREON Chat! DISCORD Follow us TWITTER MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2020 Hasbro Inc.® Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®Dawn of a New EraHello, my name is Bryan, and I would like to apply for this opportunity. I am confident and outgoing, have a flexible schedule, am easy to work with, have a reliable car, and am vaccinated. My email is bchandleremail@gmail.com, my phone number is (714) 49This chapter is kinda weird even by the standards of this story, but also one of the few chapters that doesn't include an increasingly dumb joke about making out.I'm a ballistics expert. And I'm a PC!Chapter 113: Tanka Week 2: Tanka Harder: Electric ScootalooChapter 114: Tank TankaChapter 420,69: Celestia's Tonka Truck-Sized Badonka Tanka which does not feature the appearance of Ivanka or Sri LankaThanksgiving Tanka, Ostensibly, But Really More About the Fleeting Nature of Youth, Featuring Pinkie PieCan't sleep tankaChapter 69,000,000,000,118: Finally an Actual Tanka: Making Out TankaChapter 119: Nap TankaBoyfriend Broke Up With Me TankaChapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: ChapterChapter 122: It BeginsUSe 123 To iNSert thE chaPTEr NumBER dynaMIcalLyOne time I told Sibsy she look like a female Steve Perry and she got mildly annoyedPrin124cess CELECECEcestia %i-i% Farts a Lot %i-420% 125P125r125i125n125c125e125ss 125Celestia 125F125a125r125t125s125 125a125 125l125o125t.Ponka TankaI wrote this chapter while on the clock at work because I'm a bad boy like sprout except with massively less racism and homoerotic tension with hitchnot bad. fugues are hard. i like that unexpected modulation around 1:00 and the passage which ensconces it. i would have liked more suspended notes, more variation of rhythm, more syncopation, a little more airspace, and personally i would prefer more varWhile attempting to write a chapter, Super Trampoline has an epiphany about glasses and his pony designSuper Trampoline Gives Two Cheese Recommendations: BellaVitano Merlot and Ricotta || Also I make fun of bronies a bitChapter something or other, a PSA about Skin Cancer and my Poor Spelling AbilitiesChapter 132: I Accidentally Turned Myself Invisible, so this Chapter might be kind of difficult to read.Title stories blogs new chapter add new chapter followers following chapter number dynamicallyTHIS CHAPTER INTENTIONALLY LEFT BLANKHERP DERP CHIRP CHIRPtalking about drugs, which you should not do.🅱️ionicleSunny Starscout joins the castChapter 139: Pipp sort of joins the party. Go follow Culture Slate on Twitter, Youtube, Facebook etc. I'm writing this on one of their computers lolchapter 140: Trixie explains a dumb prank she wants to pull on Twilight with my assistance to me. ALTERNATIVE TITLE: You better believe, I've got asides, diversions, and tangents up my sleeve.Trixie has BofaPrincess Zipp is gayA Pony Looks at 30 (Post Birthday Chapter)Zoom Calls and Mary SuesWhat about dis cord EMM PreggggganteyyyyyyChapter 146 : ShoresyTwilight Gets Wasted at the Grand Galloping Gala and acts scandalousPisscordFlorgishmontumeridaph returns and I take my mental health somewhat seriouslyFlanderizer? I hardly know 'er!Chapter 52: Skittles, with apologies to BookplayerChapter 152 Chapter 152You're invited! Shooting Stargazing gang gang! When: tonight, 9pm-ish to 1am-ish, depending on when people are free and have to head home. Lots of carpooling options. Where: Desert northeast of LA, Somewhere near intersectiWell yeah well you're funny looking too I'm a kitty friend or you're even bigger cutie pie you're the cutie pie is yep no I'm not I refuse to be quiet I shall tell the world how cute you are holding okay I need Jesus Take Me to ChInterlude: Meanwhile in the human world: Did you know that I have a girlfriend in real life who is a Pega sisterApplejack and the Absurdity of Equestrian Foreign PolicyChapter oroborosChapter 157: Applejack and the absurdity of going back jack and doing it again aka stop me if you've heard this one AKA there are differences I promiseChapter 158: Harbor Neight ToolsChapter Florida Hilbert HotelChatGPTer 42069: Computer attempts to steal my jobChapter 42069: Be Gay; Do CrimeChapter 2: Cadance and the Concept of Polyamory, and Also Some Stuff About GeneticsChapter 5: Angle Bunny is Acute RabbitChapter 7.5: A gift for EsteeChapter 1: Applejack and the Large Number of ApplesIt was a bright sunny day in Equestria, or at least the part where Ponyville is situated, as days in Equestria are wont to be, except when they aren't, which is a non-trivial amount of time. Birds were singing and stuff. As for myself, the bat pony named Super Trampoline, I was relaxing near the Ponyville Lake (the one that shows up once or twice a season, not to be confused with that reservoir that only appears in the Mysterious Mare Do Well. That episode sucked, so obviously it's not cannon.), tanning my leathery wings and solving Sudoku puzzles. I'm very good at Sudoku. It's one of my many talents, you see. Suddenly, Applejack Apple galloped over to me. "Super Trampoline, my amazing coltfriend and all around upright and outstanding stallion, I need your help!" A friend in need is a friend indeed, especially when she gives you smooches. "Well Applejack," I said, sure to start a new line of dialogue in a new paragraph, because I'm good at that stuff and definitely not an amateur hack that gets tripped up by spelling and grammar errors like most of those other wannabes who seem to think that they're dating my fillyfriends, "Whatever seems to be the matter?" Applejack skidded to a halt, panting. Applejack is very athletic and well toned and has a nice butt, which I was certainly not staring at, so the fact that she was panting must have meant she had galloped here very quickly, or over a long distance, or some combination of the two. Another one of my talents is deductive reasoning. Anyway, Applejack replied, "Super, my love, I planted too many apples. I don't know what to do with them all!" I love Applejack very much. She rarely beats around the bush. She gives it to you straight. You could say she's honest. Go on, say it. I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to, but I personally enjoy saying "Applejack is honest." So if she said that she planted too many apples, I assumed she meant it. Except I suspect she actually meant apple trees. Planting the fruits themselves, well, I mean, I guess I suppose what with the seeds inside that that might eventually sprout new trees, but I'm not really sure if the seeds need to be freed from the apple first. I may have many talents, but agriculture is not one of them. Fortunately I have a fillyfriend who is an excellent farmer! So I asked Applejack, "So are you telling me your problem is that you have more apples than you can harvest and sell?" "'Fraid so, Sugarcube," she said in her rustically charming way. "You're smart Super. That's why I love you. Well, one of the reasons." She blushed a little, and it was cute. "What do you think I should do with all these apples?" One of my other talents is being generous. Not as generous as Rarity--another beau of mine, of course. I'm not a mary sue. But nonetheless I am pretty generous and so I like to help less fortunate ponies. I knew there was currently a famine and a drought going on in Saddle Arabia far far away. I knew this because I read the newspaper every day. Reading is another one of my talents. Mind you, most ponies can read, even blind ones, so it's not a very special talent. So I thought to myself, you know, I bet they would appreciate some apples out there. So I told Applejack, "Sweetheart, I think that since your farm is already very profitable since apparently you have a monopoly or something on selling apples or something I don't really know though I probably should look at your books sometime, why not donate those extra apples to poor starving foals in Saddle Arabia?" "That's a great idea, Super!" she said, hugging me. She was really sweaty and stank a lot, but I didn't mind. In fact, the smell of hard work is quite pleasant. "But," she added, "how will we keep them from spoiling? And how will we transport them?" These were valid concerns. I thought for a moment. "Well, Twilight Sparkle could probably work up a refrigeration spell. And, as for transportation, well, we have this excellent socialized public transport extending throughout our country called a railroad. Don't you use that for shipping apples already? And when the apples reach the coast, we can hire a small armada of zeppelins or something. It will be great positive publicity." Twilight Sparkle, by the way, is another one of my fillyfriends. Thanks to them dating me, she and Applejack have become even closer friends. So with my toned batpony muscles and the hired help of a migrant worker (Trixie, who I'm also dating, but our relationship is long distance since she travels a lot.), we harvested all the extra apples and sent them to Saddle Arabia, so that they can be secretly sick of apples but too polite to complain about it just like I am. Author's Note Chapter 3: Super Trampoline and the Idiosyncrasies of Prench horn Author's Note: In case you haven't noticed during my two years here on this site, my cutie mark is a Prench horn. If you need a refresher course on what I look like, you can CLICK HERE. I understand that in the human world, it's called a French horn, which is weird because it's mostly German is design. Here in the pony (and other creatures) world, it's called a Prench horn, as if from Prance, except it's really Germane in design. It's a very difficult instrument to play, especially with hooves, which describes most instruments to be honest. Our valve combinations are a bit different than yours, but it's still a lovely creature with over four octaves of range, and I'm really glad I chose to play it. I got my cutie mark when I was sick of being one a dozen flautists at my school and wanted to stand out. I was told the horn is really hard and I wanted a challenge, and well, here I am today, still playing it and still in love with music.* But seriously, it's like all our instruments were designed with fingers in mind. Huh. Anyway, that's a very brief story about my Prench horn cutie mark. See, these chapters won't all be about my fillyfriends. Author's Note *True story My mark doesn't look exactly like this, but it's the closest I can find on earth. Chapter 4: Oh How the Mighty Have Fallen: A Hydra Fights Corruption Charges as a Batpony Fights Mary Sue ChargesAs everypony knows, hydras are dangerous creatures. Except they aren't. Well, some of the time they are, but most of the time they just want to play tag, but their quite vocal way of going about it scares off a lot of ponies. One of the over-arching plot lines of this most excellent story you are now reading will be the integration of hydras into Equestrian society, and the stripping of prejudices from the minds of Equestrian populace. Today a hydra was sitting in court, accused of stealing money. He also washed the money, so he received the additional charge of money laundering. That's a joke. You're supposed to laugh at it. See, he had 400 bits on his person, and since Equestrian law is speciecist, hydras aren't supposed to even have our coinage. How messed up is that. So it was assumed that he had stolen the bits. It looked like he was going to be sentenced to having another 50 kilometers added to his exile radius, when I heroically flew threw a window, shattering it and getting glass everywhere and getting some cuts, one of which eventually got infected, which is my own darn fault, but that's another story for another day. Anyway, I landed all dramatically on the courtroom floor, dripping with glass shards and blood, and yelled, "I gave this hydra the money!" He was very grateful. Oh, his name is Florgishmontumeridaph, by the way. Giving him a name helps personify him. Anyway, I stood there and told the courtroom that I had given him 400 bits to bruise me. I was going to have him break a leg or something, but I'm a wimp and didn't really want to do that. I pulled a razor from my bag of holding, and shaved off a small patch of fur on the side of my barrel near my wing, revealing a purplish bruise. The crowd gasped. "Why would you do this?!" yelled one mare. "What a twist!" yelled . "Simple," I said. "I wanted to make it look like I lost a fight with a hydra. Would a Mary Sue or Gary Stew ever lose a fight with a hydra? Hmmmm? The evidence is ample, I am neither of those, but a simple everyday pony who happens to be dating a lot of beautiful and intelligent mares. Release this hydra, for he has done nothing wrong. It is I who should be punished." The courtroom erupted in pandemonium and stuff. The hydra stomped off through the hole in the wall it had created upon entering the room. I was sentenced to 10 hours of community service and a 200 bit fine for breaking the window. All in all, it was a good day. Author's Note A particularly enthusiastic game of tag Chapter 6: It Ain't Easy Being SleazyThis one time, the Flim Flam Brothers came into town. Actually, it was like the third time. You'd think they'd get the hint to stop coming here. Actually, like the fourth time, if you count the comics, which I'm referencing right now because I'm aware of my reality as a bad OC in a fictional universe. Anyway, you'd think ponies would get a clue about their ways, but ponies can be pretty dumb some times. Luckily, my girlfriend Twilight isn't dumb. She's super duper smart. "Twilight," I said as she made me a sandwich in her Crystal Castle ~~playset~~, them con artists are at it again. Don't we have some sort of deterrence to stop them from coming here ever couple seasons? I was talking about seasons of weather, not of an animated cartoon. I would never break the fourth wall. So uncouth. Anyway, Twilight responded, "Well, one, as long as ponies in Ponyville continue to be afflicted with what seems to be either general stupidity, short term memory loss, or a combination of both, I suspect they will continue to visit semifrequently." "And two?" I prodded. "Oh, your sandwich is ready, hon." "Why thank you mon petit ver," I replied. I also speak Prench, but I'm not a Mary Sue or anything because I'm honestly not that good at it. "Anyways, what should we do about it?" I continued. "Honestly, I feel like it's kind of a buyers beware thing at this point. As long as they aren't actually selling dangerous products..." I raised my green and blue eyebrows. "Granny Smith almost fell to her death." "Hmmm, yeah, I guess. What are they hawking this time?" "Something about subscriptions to a new telegraph service." "Sounds useful," she replied with a speech tag so that who was talking wouldn't get confusing. "Yeah, but there's probably a catch. Like a termination fee or maintenance fees or other fees I'm too lazy to think of." "Yeah, probably. Should we go do something?" "I don't know. How would Princess Celestia deal with this situation?" "She'd pawn the problem off to me." "Yeah, she kind of does that a lot doesn't she?" "Mhhm." "But hey, you got wings and a castle out of it." "Mhhm." "Wanna make out right now?" "Mhhm." Author's Note How we eventually "solved" the problem: Chapter 7: Trixie Must Face the Realities of Her Place In LifeChapter 14: I Did the Thing Samurai Jack Wanted To Do But Never Could Colors, tastes, sensations etc. returned to me as I found myself standing on a pathway on the edge of town. I shook the dizziness from my head and took stock of my surroundings. It was daytime, probably late afternoon, and the temperature was hot, but not unbearably so. Ponyville lay ahead, a bit smaller than I was used to, and lacking a gaudy castle towering above the surrounding quaint thatched roof cottages. I sniffed the air; it smelled like opportunity. Happily, I cantered into town, stopping the first stallion I could find to ask, "Excuse me good sir, but what is today's date?" He happily answered "Why, a bat pony! We don't see your type around here very often. Maybe you can help some ponies learn about accepting those who are different from you in a few months." "You mean taking a few months to accept them, or that this will occur a few months from now?" I asked, seeking clarification of the ambiguous statement. Making people clarify their unintentionally unambiguous statements is one of my many talents. He happily clarified. "Oh, dear me. The later." "Thank, you," I replied, satisfied. "But the date, sir?" "Oh, right, well, today is __/__/____ [The measure and passage of time in this land is vague and contradictory, so just pretend he some time about two to four years ago.]. Have you heard the news? Rumor has it, the Princess is sending her very own apprentice, Twilight Sparkle, to oversee preparations for the Summer Summer Sun Summer Sun Celebration!" "Oh, really?" I responded, feigning surprise. "Well, then I better be on my way. I have much planning to do myself!" This wasn't strictly untrue. I did have plans to make. "Alright then, young lad, you be on your way then!" he said, happily. Ponies days are always a little brighter after I visit them. I trotted off towards my destination. Ten minutes later, I reached said destination, one of Ponyville's many quaint thatched roof cottages. Here came the weird part. I flew up to the second story balcony and unlocked the door, trotting into what appeared to be a very messy bedroom. "Hello, is somepony there?" A voice asked from behind a restroom door. "Yeah, it's Rainbow Dash," I lied, throwing my voice. One of my many talents is impersonating other ponies, and Dash happens to be one of the easier ponies to copy. "Oh, kay, out in a second," the stallion replied. I sat down on the bed and waited. A few minutes later, I heard the whoosh of running water, and the door opened. Into the room stepped a handsome dark-furred batpony with wild lime green and sapphire blue mane and tail. He gasped. "Y-y-y-who are you?" I smirked cooly at my younger, more naïve self. "I'm you, but stronger!" Author's Note DUN DUN DUN WHAT A Chapter 8: Rise of Shining Armor's Food Cart EmpireChapter 29: The Return of Florgishmontumeridaph You may recall from chapter four, Hydras experience widespread discrimination in contemporary Equestrian society. Inasmuch, many hydras left the territories. But Florgishmontumeridaph was determined to make it. Inasmuch, one day, he paid a visit to an old friend, me, Super Trampoline. I had previously helped him out in court, and he wanted to both repay the favor and help himself. So he came to visit me. “Hello, Super Trampoline,” the four-headed beast bellowed. “I’d like to open a massage parlor here in Ponyville. Would you like to be a practice customer?” “Sure,” I said. “Just don’t, uh, crush me, please.” Florgishmontumeridaph nodded. Rather than use his arms, since he didn’t have any, he used his various tongues to gently massage my back. It felt very nice, as my back had been sore lately, on account of bucking trees with Applejack last week. I sighed in bliss as I felt my tendons and ligaments and muscles and bones released endorphins. This went on for twenty minutes, and when he was finished, my back was slobbery, but super relaxed. I smiled. “Florgishmontumeridaph, that felt wonderful. I think this massage business idea could really take off.” Florgishmontumeridaph‘s heads smiled in unison. “Awesome. Can you help me get a business license?” ‘Sure thing dude.” Then we went out for drinks. Author's Note Special Guest Author Protopony350: Super Tramampoline gets spied on by a lesser pony who also wishes to put an end to Friday foreverChapter 30: Sunset Cuddles Super Trampoline yawned. He had had a very long day of writing music and pulling carts here and there and also playing some board games with his friend Sound Byte. Sound Byte was a computational machine programmer and also played cello. Anyway, he kept yawning, and Sunset Shimmer noticed. She was staying at his place during a brief trip back to the Pony world. She had a different boyfriend back in the human world, but here in Ponyville, all the main characters are dating Super Trampoline. “Tramp, Honey, if you are so tired, you should just go to sleep and stop writing ‘My Tiny Gecko’ fanfiction.” She was right of course. So Super Trampoline finished the chapter he was writing and went to sleep. Chapter 9: Even Ponies As Awesome As Me Get Depressed Sometimes.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 10: You Better Believe I've Got Trix Up My Sleeves, Except I Don't Have Sleeves.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 11: Darn Luna, You Scary!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 14: I Did the Thing Samurai Jack Wanted To Do But Never CouldSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 15: Ain't No Rest For the LazySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 18: MEANWHILE...Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 19: WHEANMILE...Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 20: WHILEMEAN...Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 21: Something Happens and I'm Head Over HeelsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 24: Applejack Bakes BreadSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 25: Applejack Faces Her InsecuritiesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 26.1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Seeing someone treated respectfully by a parent left your character with a sense of respect. An act of dishonesty on the part of a mentor left your character feeling resentful and made your character decide to get even. Your character had many friends gSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.The Freedom FighterSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.If you don't Vote, downvoteSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter Twenty Eight: In Which Rainbow Dash is Sick and Applejack Bakes PieSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 29: The Return of FlorgishmontumeridaphSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 30: Sunset CuddlesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Beginning of the Black and Red Alicorn OC Arc: Chapter 31: The Beginning of a PlotSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 32: Back to the PastSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 33: A Leave of Our Previous Plot To Talk About GardeningSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 34: Applejack's EyebrowsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 35: The RainforestSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter Thirty Six: And Also The Major Antagonists.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 37: The OCs That Time ForgotSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 38: The ElderSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 39: Meanwhile Back at the FarmSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 40: The AttackSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 41: The EscapeSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 42: The Jungle Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 43: The Jungle Part 2Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 44: The Temple Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 45: The Temple Part 2Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 46: The Temple Part 3Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 47: Meanwhile, a Story About Cadance and Shining Armor and Coffee CreamerSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 48: Back to the BattleSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 49: Meanwhile, a Story About TrixieSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.I Just Realized That There is Nothing Stopping Me From Updating This Story.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Oh God, There is Nothing Stopping Me From Writing Literally ANYTHING I Want Here (As Long as It is Rated “Everyone”)!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.My Friend's Unamed OC Likes BroccoliSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.A Short Chapter With Princess EmberSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Batponies Love MangosSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.PoopSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Not a Good DaySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Just For Fun, I Wrote This Chapter With the Help of a Neural Network.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.The Shortest Chapter of This StorySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Starlight Glimmer Introduces a Bit of Plot to This Whole MessSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.New Year, New TraditionsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.You're Probably Wondering Why I've Gathered You All Here TodaySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Use 60 to insert the chapter number dynamicallySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Super Trampoline Takes a NapSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Super Trampoline Makes a PunSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Announcement:Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.1711,486 681 3,573 Edit Publish 1 Formatting Chapter Title Use 65 to insert the chapter number dynamically. You can also add a number to the value such as 67 FILE FORMAT HELP SpSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.ApplejackSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.OopsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Does Saying Rainbow Dash is Hot Bump the Rating of This From Everyone to Teen? I Hope Not, Because Rainbow Dash is Hot.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.DepressionSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.OhSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Remember that K-Pop Song, Gee Gee Gee Gee Baby Baby?Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.As Rarity Would Say, I love Being Covered in Maud!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.The Party Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.The Quest, Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.The Talk Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.The Ponk Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.The Bonk Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 78: The TalkSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.This Story is (For) Now Exactly 15,000 Words Long!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 79: New HorizonsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Now For a Birthday Chapter!!!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter."Crushed By Foals" by the dobermans: Guest Author Week Day 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.“Infrastructure Week for My Infinite Marefriends (a.k.a. The Ride Literally Never Ends)” by Jay Bear v2: Guest Author Week Day 2Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter."Bumblebeau Takes the Cake" by Bumblebeau: Guest Author Week Day 3Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Taking a Break From Guest Author Week Because Not That Many People Actually Submitted Guest ChaptersSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 86: From Ladle to GraveSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 87 Haha this is very clearly fiction and not at all based on what has actually been happening in my life over the last three days! Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 ChapterSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.87 chapterSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Tanka Week Day 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Tanka Day 2Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Celestia TankaSomething has gone wrong. 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We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Stats Page generated in 0.076 seconds Total duration 0.376 seconds 1,165 users online 494,874 hits today, 1,554,714 yesterday • Site Statistics FIMFiction My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction Designed and coded by knighty & XaqusegSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Oh Snap this must be the Hundredth Chapter! Because I used % i % to insert the chapter number dynamically and the result is: 101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 102: I Cleaned My Room!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Listen to Tower of Babel by Elton BonSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.This Chapter Contains a Slightly Strange Picture of Two Sandwiches I Made Today and Also a List of the Ingredients Contained Within Each Sandwich. Oh, and Also a Pizza Recommendation.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Big Mac and I Make Out. Also, I'm Sad No One Commented On My Sandwiches :(((Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.I hang out with Purple SmartSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Help I'm Stuck in a Very Short Chapter!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Follow & Support Us Support us PATREON Chat! DISCORD Follow us TWITTER MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2020 Hasbro Inc.® Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Dawn of a New EraSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Hello, my name is Bryan, and I would like to apply for this opportunity. I am confident and outgoing, have a flexible schedule, am easy to work with, have a reliable car, and am vaccinated. My email is bchandleremail@gmail.com, my phone number is (714) 49Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.This chapter is kinda weird even by the standards of this story, but also one of the few chapters that doesn't include an increasingly dumb joke about making out.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.I'm a ballistics expert. And I'm a PC!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 113: Tanka Week 2: Tanka Harder: Electric ScootalooSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 114: Tank TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 420,69: Celestia's Tonka Truck-Sized Badonka Tanka which does not feature the appearance of Ivanka or Sri LankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Thanksgiving Tanka, Ostensibly, But Really More About the Fleeting Nature of Youth, Featuring Pinkie PieSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Can't sleep tankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 69,000,000,000,118: Finally an Actual Tanka: Making Out TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 119: Nap TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Boyfriend Broke Up With Me TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: ChapterSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 122: It BeginsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.USe 123 To iNSert thE chaPTEr NumBER dynaMIcalLySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.One time I told Sibsy she look like a female Steve Perry and she got mildly annoyedSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Prin124cess CELECECEcestia %i-i% Farts a Lot %i-420% 125P125r125i125n125c125e125ss 125Celestia 125F125a125r125t125s125 125a125 125l125o125t.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Ponka TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.I wrote this chapter while on the clock at work because I'm a bad boy like sprout except with massively less racism and homoerotic tension with hitchSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.not bad. fugues are hard. i like that unexpected modulation around 1:00 and the passage which ensconces it. i would have liked more suspended notes, more variation of rhythm, more syncopation, a little more airspace, and personally i would prefer more varSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.While attempting to write a chapter, Super Trampoline has an epiphany about glasses and his pony designSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Super Trampoline Gives Two Cheese Recommendations: BellaVitano Merlot and Ricotta || Also I make fun of bronies a bitSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter something or other, a PSA about Skin Cancer and my Poor Spelling AbilitiesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 132: I Accidentally Turned Myself Invisible, so this Chapter might be kind of difficult to read.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Title stories blogs new chapter add new chapter followers following chapter number dynamicallySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.THIS CHAPTER INTENTIONALLY LEFT BLANKSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.HERP DERP CHIRP CHIRPSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.talking about drugs, which you should not do.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.🅱️ionicleSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Sunny Starscout joins the castSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 139: Pipp sort of joins the party. Go follow Culture Slate on Twitter, Youtube, Facebook etc. I'm writing this on one of their computers lolSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.chapter 140: Trixie explains a dumb prank she wants to pull on Twilight with my assistance to me. ALTERNATIVE TITLE: You better believe, I've got asides, diversions, and tangents up my sleeve.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Trixie has BofaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Princess Zipp is gaySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.A Pony Looks at 30 (Post Birthday Chapter)Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Zoom Calls and Mary SuesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.What about dis cord EMM PreggggganteyyyyyySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 146 : ShoresySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Twilight Gets Wasted at the Grand Galloping Gala and acts scandalousSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.PisscordSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Florgishmontumeridaph returns and I take my mental health somewhat seriouslySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Flanderizer? I hardly know 'er!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 52: Skittles, with apologies to BookplayerSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 152 Chapter 152You're invited! Shooting Stargazing gang gang! When: tonight, 9pm-ish to 1am-ish, depending on when people are free and have to head home. Lots of carpooling options. Where: Desert northeast of LA, Somewhere near intersectiSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Well yeah well you're funny looking too I'm a kitty friend or you're even bigger cutie pie you're the cutie pie is yep no I'm not I refuse to be quiet I shall tell the world how cute you are holding okay I need Jesus Take Me to ChSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Interlude: Meanwhile in the human world: Did you know that I have a girlfriend in real life who is a Pega sisterSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Applejack and the Absurdity of Equestrian Foreign PolicySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter oroborosSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 157: Applejack and the absurdity of going back jack and doing it again aka stop me if you've heard this one AKA there are differences I promiseSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 158: Harbor Neight ToolsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter Florida Hilbert HotelSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.ChatGPTer 42069: Computer attempts to steal my jobSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 42069: Be Gay; Do CrimeSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 2: Cadance and the Concept of Polyamory, and Also Some Stuff About GeneticsAs I said in the description, I am currently dating all four princesses of Equestria. However, I was also dating Twilight before she became a princess. You might find some stories from back then in this collection too. Since I am only dating these ponies right now and haven't married any of them yet, we don't do anythings that would necessitate this collection having a "Teen" tag. Doing adult married-pony stuff if you're not married is wrong, and I'm a good pony. Cadance, or sometimes Cadence, spelled with an "e", depending on the time of day and the weather conditions, is the princess of love. While she's married to Shining Armor, she also has many other coltfriends. I am lucky to be one of them. While most males in Equestria have harems of sorts, because for some reason we have like three times as many females as males, which makes me suspect we were designed by something other than evolution, like perhaps a marketing department (I'm very smart, so I know this concept is called Fisher's principle.), Cadance is one of the less common females will multiple male partners. And a few female ones too. and a few mail partners too, also known as pen pals. Because we're progressive ponies. Anyway, Cadance doesn't get to spend a lot of time with me because she's busy doing wifey things with her husband and running an empire and whatnot, but she does believe in free love, provided it is backed by clear communication and trust. So when I do get to spend time with her, I enjoy adventuring (princess duties can be tedious) and making out. Author's Note Speaking of trust issues, Cadence and Shiny still have some. Chapter 5: Angle Bunny is Acute RabbitAngle Bunny wasn't eating his vegetables because he is a very picky eater. So I talked to him. Fluttershy taught me how to talk to animals. I'm not as good as her, but it still worked. I taught him how there are rabbits living in Saddle Arabia who are starving, so he should be thankful for his salad. So he ate it. "Wow, Super, you're so sweet and caring," Fluttershy sang-song as she threw a kiss on the tip of my muzzle. It was nice. I was tired, so I went and took a nap in a cloud. I can't shape clouds as well as pegasi, but they are still very comfortable. Author's Note ~~This chapter should be longer, but I'm pretty tired, and it's not like I'm threatening my downvote/upvote ratio.~~ Chapter 7.5: A gift for EsteeChapter Twenty Eight: In Which Rainbow Dash is Sick and Applejack Bakes Pie Rainbow Dash was sick. Too bad, really; she doesn't deserved to be sick. I mean, most ponies don't, really. Only really bad ponies, like Sombra. He's dead though, so that's a moot point. Anyway, Applejack is a really sweet pony, so she decided to bake an "I'm sorry you're sick" pie for Rainbow Dash. She's really a great pony, even if other ponies are mean to her, and call her mean names like "silly pony" and "background pony". Anyway, do you want to guess the type of pie she baked? I'll give you a minute. That's right she baked an apple pie! I bet you thought she was going to be subversive and bake a blueberry pie or a tofu pot pie!* Nope! Good old fashioned Apple Pie, that good old fashioned Applejack. You thought I was going to tell you how she made it, didn't you? Nope; check the author's notes if you want to know. Anyway, she can't fly, so I carried her to Rainbow's house and she delivered the pie and it was very sweet and we ate the pie together and after we were all full we all made out to make Rainbow Dash feel better. Making out always makes a pony feel better. Author's Note Here's a simple easy Apple Pie recipe: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/219165/chef-johns-easy-apple-pie/ Try making it, and tell me in the comments section how it goes! Please also post pictures of your pie! *Apparently the line of Penny Lane "Four of fish and finger pie" is actually very naughty, so no referencing that in the story! Oops!
Chapter 1: Applejack and the Large Number of ApplesIt was a bright sunny day in Equestria, or at least the part where Ponyville is situated, as days in Equestria are wont to be, except when they aren't, which is a non-trivial amount of time. Birds were singing and stuff. As for myself, the bat pony named Super Trampoline, I was relaxing near the Ponyville Lake (the one that shows up once or twice a season, not to be confused with that reservoir that only appears in the Mysterious Mare Do Well. That episode sucked, so obviously it's not cannon.), tanning my leathery wings and solving Sudoku puzzles. I'm very good at Sudoku. It's one of my many talents, you see. Suddenly, Applejack Apple galloped over to me. "Super Trampoline, my amazing coltfriend and all around upright and outstanding stallion, I need your help!" A friend in need is a friend indeed, especially when she gives you smooches. "Well Applejack," I said, sure to start a new line of dialogue in a new paragraph, because I'm good at that stuff and definitely not an amateur hack that gets tripped up by spelling and grammar errors like most of those other wannabes who seem to think that they're dating my fillyfriends, "Whatever seems to be the matter?" Applejack skidded to a halt, panting. Applejack is very athletic and well toned and has a nice butt, which I was certainly not staring at, so the fact that she was panting must have meant she had galloped here very quickly, or over a long distance, or some combination of the two. Another one of my talents is deductive reasoning. Anyway, Applejack replied, "Super, my love, I planted too many apples. I don't know what to do with them all!" I love Applejack very much. She rarely beats around the bush. She gives it to you straight. You could say she's honest. Go on, say it. I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to, but I personally enjoy saying "Applejack is honest." So if she said that she planted too many apples, I assumed she meant it. Except I suspect she actually meant apple trees. Planting the fruits themselves, well, I mean, I guess I suppose what with the seeds inside that that might eventually sprout new trees, but I'm not really sure if the seeds need to be freed from the apple first. I may have many talents, but agriculture is not one of them. Fortunately I have a fillyfriend who is an excellent farmer! So I asked Applejack, "So are you telling me your problem is that you have more apples than you can harvest and sell?" "'Fraid so, Sugarcube," she said in her rustically charming way. "You're smart Super. That's why I love you. Well, one of the reasons." She blushed a little, and it was cute. "What do you think I should do with all these apples?" One of my other talents is being generous. Not as generous as Rarity--another beau of mine, of course. I'm not a mary sue. But nonetheless I am pretty generous and so I like to help less fortunate ponies. I knew there was currently a famine and a drought going on in Saddle Arabia far far away. I knew this because I read the newspaper every day. Reading is another one of my talents. Mind you, most ponies can read, even blind ones, so it's not a very special talent. So I thought to myself, you know, I bet they would appreciate some apples out there. So I told Applejack, "Sweetheart, I think that since your farm is already very profitable since apparently you have a monopoly or something on selling apples or something I don't really know though I probably should look at your books sometime, why not donate those extra apples to poor starving foals in Saddle Arabia?" "That's a great idea, Super!" she said, hugging me. She was really sweaty and stank a lot, but I didn't mind. In fact, the smell of hard work is quite pleasant. "But," she added, "how will we keep them from spoiling? And how will we transport them?" These were valid concerns. I thought for a moment. "Well, Twilight Sparkle could probably work up a refrigeration spell. And, as for transportation, well, we have this excellent socialized public transport extending throughout our country called a railroad. Don't you use that for shipping apples already? And when the apples reach the coast, we can hire a small armada of zeppelins or something. It will be great positive publicity." Twilight Sparkle, by the way, is another one of my fillyfriends. Thanks to them dating me, she and Applejack have become even closer friends. So with my toned batpony muscles and the hired help of a migrant worker (Trixie, who I'm also dating, but our relationship is long distance since she travels a lot.), we harvested all the extra apples and sent them to Saddle Arabia, so that they can be secretly sick of apples but too polite to complain about it just like I am. Author's Note
Chapter 3: Super Trampoline and the Idiosyncrasies of Prench horn Author's Note: In case you haven't noticed during my two years here on this site, my cutie mark is a Prench horn. If you need a refresher course on what I look like, you can CLICK HERE. I understand that in the human world, it's called a French horn, which is weird because it's mostly German is design. Here in the pony (and other creatures) world, it's called a Prench horn, as if from Prance, except it's really Germane in design. It's a very difficult instrument to play, especially with hooves, which describes most instruments to be honest. Our valve combinations are a bit different than yours, but it's still a lovely creature with over four octaves of range, and I'm really glad I chose to play it. I got my cutie mark when I was sick of being one a dozen flautists at my school and wanted to stand out. I was told the horn is really hard and I wanted a challenge, and well, here I am today, still playing it and still in love with music.* But seriously, it's like all our instruments were designed with fingers in mind. Huh. Anyway, that's a very brief story about my Prench horn cutie mark. See, these chapters won't all be about my fillyfriends. Author's Note *True story My mark doesn't look exactly like this, but it's the closest I can find on earth.
Chapter 4: Oh How the Mighty Have Fallen: A Hydra Fights Corruption Charges as a Batpony Fights Mary Sue ChargesAs everypony knows, hydras are dangerous creatures. Except they aren't. Well, some of the time they are, but most of the time they just want to play tag, but their quite vocal way of going about it scares off a lot of ponies. One of the over-arching plot lines of this most excellent story you are now reading will be the integration of hydras into Equestrian society, and the stripping of prejudices from the minds of Equestrian populace. Today a hydra was sitting in court, accused of stealing money. He also washed the money, so he received the additional charge of money laundering. That's a joke. You're supposed to laugh at it. See, he had 400 bits on his person, and since Equestrian law is speciecist, hydras aren't supposed to even have our coinage. How messed up is that. So it was assumed that he had stolen the bits. It looked like he was going to be sentenced to having another 50 kilometers added to his exile radius, when I heroically flew threw a window, shattering it and getting glass everywhere and getting some cuts, one of which eventually got infected, which is my own darn fault, but that's another story for another day. Anyway, I landed all dramatically on the courtroom floor, dripping with glass shards and blood, and yelled, "I gave this hydra the money!" He was very grateful. Oh, his name is Florgishmontumeridaph, by the way. Giving him a name helps personify him. Anyway, I stood there and told the courtroom that I had given him 400 bits to bruise me. I was going to have him break a leg or something, but I'm a wimp and didn't really want to do that. I pulled a razor from my bag of holding, and shaved off a small patch of fur on the side of my barrel near my wing, revealing a purplish bruise. The crowd gasped. "Why would you do this?!" yelled one mare. "What a twist!" yelled . "Simple," I said. "I wanted to make it look like I lost a fight with a hydra. Would a Mary Sue or Gary Stew ever lose a fight with a hydra? Hmmmm? The evidence is ample, I am neither of those, but a simple everyday pony who happens to be dating a lot of beautiful and intelligent mares. Release this hydra, for he has done nothing wrong. It is I who should be punished." The courtroom erupted in pandemonium and stuff. The hydra stomped off through the hole in the wall it had created upon entering the room. I was sentenced to 10 hours of community service and a 200 bit fine for breaking the window. All in all, it was a good day. Author's Note A particularly enthusiastic game of tag
Chapter 6: It Ain't Easy Being SleazyThis one time, the Flim Flam Brothers came into town. Actually, it was like the third time. You'd think they'd get the hint to stop coming here. Actually, like the fourth time, if you count the comics, which I'm referencing right now because I'm aware of my reality as a bad OC in a fictional universe. Anyway, you'd think ponies would get a clue about their ways, but ponies can be pretty dumb some times. Luckily, my girlfriend Twilight isn't dumb. She's super duper smart. "Twilight," I said as she made me a sandwich in her Crystal Castle ~~playset~~, them con artists are at it again. Don't we have some sort of deterrence to stop them from coming here ever couple seasons? I was talking about seasons of weather, not of an animated cartoon. I would never break the fourth wall. So uncouth. Anyway, Twilight responded, "Well, one, as long as ponies in Ponyville continue to be afflicted with what seems to be either general stupidity, short term memory loss, or a combination of both, I suspect they will continue to visit semifrequently." "And two?" I prodded. "Oh, your sandwich is ready, hon." "Why thank you mon petit ver," I replied. I also speak Prench, but I'm not a Mary Sue or anything because I'm honestly not that good at it. "Anyways, what should we do about it?" I continued. "Honestly, I feel like it's kind of a buyers beware thing at this point. As long as they aren't actually selling dangerous products..." I raised my green and blue eyebrows. "Granny Smith almost fell to her death." "Hmmm, yeah, I guess. What are they hawking this time?" "Something about subscriptions to a new telegraph service." "Sounds useful," she replied with a speech tag so that who was talking wouldn't get confusing. "Yeah, but there's probably a catch. Like a termination fee or maintenance fees or other fees I'm too lazy to think of." "Yeah, probably. Should we go do something?" "I don't know. How would Princess Celestia deal with this situation?" "She'd pawn the problem off to me." "Yeah, she kind of does that a lot doesn't she?" "Mhhm." "But hey, you got wings and a castle out of it." "Mhhm." "Wanna make out right now?" "Mhhm." Author's Note How we eventually "solved" the problem:
Chapter 7: Trixie Must Face the Realities of Her Place In LifeChapter 14: I Did the Thing Samurai Jack Wanted To Do But Never Could Colors, tastes, sensations etc. returned to me as I found myself standing on a pathway on the edge of town. I shook the dizziness from my head and took stock of my surroundings. It was daytime, probably late afternoon, and the temperature was hot, but not unbearably so. Ponyville lay ahead, a bit smaller than I was used to, and lacking a gaudy castle towering above the surrounding quaint thatched roof cottages. I sniffed the air; it smelled like opportunity. Happily, I cantered into town, stopping the first stallion I could find to ask, "Excuse me good sir, but what is today's date?" He happily answered "Why, a bat pony! We don't see your type around here very often. Maybe you can help some ponies learn about accepting those who are different from you in a few months." "You mean taking a few months to accept them, or that this will occur a few months from now?" I asked, seeking clarification of the ambiguous statement. Making people clarify their unintentionally unambiguous statements is one of my many talents. He happily clarified. "Oh, dear me. The later." "Thank, you," I replied, satisfied. "But the date, sir?" "Oh, right, well, today is __/__/____ [The measure and passage of time in this land is vague and contradictory, so just pretend he some time about two to four years ago.]. Have you heard the news? Rumor has it, the Princess is sending her very own apprentice, Twilight Sparkle, to oversee preparations for the Summer Summer Sun Summer Sun Celebration!" "Oh, really?" I responded, feigning surprise. "Well, then I better be on my way. I have much planning to do myself!" This wasn't strictly untrue. I did have plans to make. "Alright then, young lad, you be on your way then!" he said, happily. Ponies days are always a little brighter after I visit them. I trotted off towards my destination. Ten minutes later, I reached said destination, one of Ponyville's many quaint thatched roof cottages. Here came the weird part. I flew up to the second story balcony and unlocked the door, trotting into what appeared to be a very messy bedroom. "Hello, is somepony there?" A voice asked from behind a restroom door. "Yeah, it's Rainbow Dash," I lied, throwing my voice. One of my many talents is impersonating other ponies, and Dash happens to be one of the easier ponies to copy. "Oh, kay, out in a second," the stallion replied. I sat down on the bed and waited. A few minutes later, I heard the whoosh of running water, and the door opened. Into the room stepped a handsome dark-furred batpony with wild lime green and sapphire blue mane and tail. He gasped. "Y-y-y-who are you?" I smirked cooly at my younger, more naïve self. "I'm you, but stronger!" Author's Note DUN DUN DUN WHAT A
Chapter 8: Rise of Shining Armor's Food Cart EmpireChapter 29: The Return of Florgishmontumeridaph You may recall from chapter four, Hydras experience widespread discrimination in contemporary Equestrian society. Inasmuch, many hydras left the territories. But Florgishmontumeridaph was determined to make it. Inasmuch, one day, he paid a visit to an old friend, me, Super Trampoline. I had previously helped him out in court, and he wanted to both repay the favor and help himself. So he came to visit me. “Hello, Super Trampoline,” the four-headed beast bellowed. “I’d like to open a massage parlor here in Ponyville. Would you like to be a practice customer?” “Sure,” I said. “Just don’t, uh, crush me, please.” Florgishmontumeridaph nodded. Rather than use his arms, since he didn’t have any, he used his various tongues to gently massage my back. It felt very nice, as my back had been sore lately, on account of bucking trees with Applejack last week. I sighed in bliss as I felt my tendons and ligaments and muscles and bones released endorphins. This went on for twenty minutes, and when he was finished, my back was slobbery, but super relaxed. I smiled. “Florgishmontumeridaph, that felt wonderful. I think this massage business idea could really take off.” Florgishmontumeridaph‘s heads smiled in unison. “Awesome. Can you help me get a business license?” ‘Sure thing dude.” Then we went out for drinks. Author's Note
Special Guest Author Protopony350: Super Tramampoline gets spied on by a lesser pony who also wishes to put an end to Friday foreverChapter 30: Sunset Cuddles Super Trampoline yawned. He had had a very long day of writing music and pulling carts here and there and also playing some board games with his friend Sound Byte. Sound Byte was a computational machine programmer and also played cello. Anyway, he kept yawning, and Sunset Shimmer noticed. She was staying at his place during a brief trip back to the Pony world. She had a different boyfriend back in the human world, but here in Ponyville, all the main characters are dating Super Trampoline. “Tramp, Honey, if you are so tired, you should just go to sleep and stop writing ‘My Tiny Gecko’ fanfiction.” She was right of course. So Super Trampoline finished the chapter he was writing and went to sleep.
Chapter 9: Even Ponies As Awesome As Me Get Depressed Sometimes.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 10: You Better Believe I've Got Trix Up My Sleeves, Except I Don't Have Sleeves.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
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Chapter 18: MEANWHILE...Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 19: WHEANMILE...Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 20: WHILEMEAN...Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 21: Something Happens and I'm Head Over HeelsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 24: Applejack Bakes BreadSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
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Seeing someone treated respectfully by a parent left your character with a sense of respect. An act of dishonesty on the part of a mentor left your character feeling resentful and made your character decide to get even. Your character had many friends gSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
If you don't Vote, downvoteSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter Twenty Eight: In Which Rainbow Dash is Sick and Applejack Bakes PieSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 29: The Return of FlorgishmontumeridaphSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 30: Sunset CuddlesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Beginning of the Black and Red Alicorn OC Arc: Chapter 31: The Beginning of a PlotSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
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Chapter 33: A Leave of Our Previous Plot To Talk About GardeningSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 34: Applejack's EyebrowsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 35: The RainforestSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter Thirty Six: And Also The Major Antagonists.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 37: The OCs That Time ForgotSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 38: The ElderSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 39: Meanwhile Back at the FarmSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 40: The AttackSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 41: The EscapeSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 42: The Jungle Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
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Chapter 44: The Temple Part 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
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Chapter 46: The Temple Part 3Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 47: Meanwhile, a Story About Cadance and Shining Armor and Coffee CreamerSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 48: Back to the BattleSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 49: Meanwhile, a Story About TrixieSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
I Just Realized That There is Nothing Stopping Me From Updating This Story.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Oh God, There is Nothing Stopping Me From Writing Literally ANYTHING I Want Here (As Long as It is Rated “Everyone”)!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
My Friend's Unamed OC Likes BroccoliSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
A Short Chapter With Princess EmberSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Batponies Love MangosSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Just For Fun, I Wrote This Chapter With the Help of a Neural Network.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
The Shortest Chapter of This StorySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Starlight Glimmer Introduces a Bit of Plot to This Whole MessSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
New Year, New TraditionsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
You're Probably Wondering Why I've Gathered You All Here TodaySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Use 60 to insert the chapter number dynamicallySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Super Trampoline Takes a NapSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Super Trampoline Makes a PunSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464646464Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
1711,486 681 3,573 Edit Publish 1 Formatting Chapter Title Use 65 to insert the chapter number dynamically. You can also add a number to the value such as 67 FILE FORMAT HELP SpSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Does Saying Rainbow Dash is Hot Bump the Rating of This From Everyone to Teen? I Hope Not, Because Rainbow Dash is Hot.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Remember that K-Pop Song, Gee Gee Gee Gee Baby Baby?Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
As Rarity Would Say, I love Being Covered in Maud!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 78: The TalkSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
This Story is (For) Now Exactly 15,000 Words Long!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 79: New HorizonsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Now For a Birthday Chapter!!!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
"Crushed By Foals" by the dobermans: Guest Author Week Day 1Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
“Infrastructure Week for My Infinite Marefriends (a.k.a. The Ride Literally Never Ends)” by Jay Bear v2: Guest Author Week Day 2Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
"Bumblebeau Takes the Cake" by Bumblebeau: Guest Author Week Day 3Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Taking a Break From Guest Author Week Because Not That Many People Actually Submitted Guest ChaptersSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 86: From Ladle to GraveSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 87 Haha this is very clearly fiction and not at all based on what has actually been happening in my life over the last three days! Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 Chapter 87 ChapterSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Twilight drops a truth Tsar-BombaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 989898989898Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Hey Cheerilee Cheerilee by Glaze and The Living Tombstone TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Stats Page generated in 0.076 seconds Total duration 0.376 seconds 1,165 users online 494,874 hits today, 1,554,714 yesterday • Site Statistics FIMFiction My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction Designed and coded by knighty & XaqusegSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Oh Snap this must be the Hundredth Chapter! Because I used % i % to insert the chapter number dynamically and the result is: 101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101101Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 102: I Cleaned My Room!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Listen to Tower of Babel by Elton BonSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
This Chapter Contains a Slightly Strange Picture of Two Sandwiches I Made Today and Also a List of the Ingredients Contained Within Each Sandwich. Oh, and Also a Pizza Recommendation.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Big Mac and I Make Out. Also, I'm Sad No One Commented On My Sandwiches :(((Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
I hang out with Purple SmartSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Help I'm Stuck in a Very Short Chapter!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Follow & Support Us Support us PATREON Chat! DISCORD Follow us TWITTER MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2020 Hasbro Inc.® Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Hello, my name is Bryan, and I would like to apply for this opportunity. I am confident and outgoing, have a flexible schedule, am easy to work with, have a reliable car, and am vaccinated. My email is bchandleremail@gmail.com, my phone number is (714) 49Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
This chapter is kinda weird even by the standards of this story, but also one of the few chapters that doesn't include an increasingly dumb joke about making out.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
I'm a ballistics expert. And I'm a PC!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 113: Tanka Week 2: Tanka Harder: Electric ScootalooSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 114: Tank TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 420,69: Celestia's Tonka Truck-Sized Badonka Tanka which does not feature the appearance of Ivanka or Sri LankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Thanksgiving Tanka, Ostensibly, But Really More About the Fleeting Nature of Youth, Featuring Pinkie PieSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 69,000,000,000,118: Finally an Actual Tanka: Making Out TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 119: Nap TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Boyfriend Broke Up With Me TankaSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: Chapter 121: ChapterSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 122: It BeginsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
USe 123 To iNSert thE chaPTEr NumBER dynaMIcalLySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
One time I told Sibsy she look like a female Steve Perry and she got mildly annoyedSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Prin124cess CELECECEcestia %i-i% Farts a Lot %i-420% 125P125r125i125n125c125e125ss 125Celestia 125F125a125r125t125s125 125a125 125l125o125t.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
I wrote this chapter while on the clock at work because I'm a bad boy like sprout except with massively less racism and homoerotic tension with hitchSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
not bad. fugues are hard. i like that unexpected modulation around 1:00 and the passage which ensconces it. i would have liked more suspended notes, more variation of rhythm, more syncopation, a little more airspace, and personally i would prefer more varSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
While attempting to write a chapter, Super Trampoline has an epiphany about glasses and his pony designSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Super Trampoline Gives Two Cheese Recommendations: BellaVitano Merlot and Ricotta || Also I make fun of bronies a bitSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter something or other, a PSA about Skin Cancer and my Poor Spelling AbilitiesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 132: I Accidentally Turned Myself Invisible, so this Chapter might be kind of difficult to read.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Title stories blogs new chapter add new chapter followers following chapter number dynamicallySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
THIS CHAPTER INTENTIONALLY LEFT BLANKSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
HERP DERP CHIRP CHIRPSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
talking about drugs, which you should not do.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Sunny Starscout joins the castSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 139: Pipp sort of joins the party. Go follow Culture Slate on Twitter, Youtube, Facebook etc. I'm writing this on one of their computers lolSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
chapter 140: Trixie explains a dumb prank she wants to pull on Twilight with my assistance to me. ALTERNATIVE TITLE: You better believe, I've got asides, diversions, and tangents up my sleeve.Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Princess Zipp is gaySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
A Pony Looks at 30 (Post Birthday Chapter)Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Zoom Calls and Mary SuesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
What about dis cord EMM PreggggganteyyyyyySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 146 : ShoresySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Twilight Gets Wasted at the Grand Galloping Gala and acts scandalousSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Florgishmontumeridaph returns and I take my mental health somewhat seriouslySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Flanderizer? I hardly know 'er!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 52: Skittles, with apologies to BookplayerSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 152 Chapter 152You're invited! Shooting Stargazing gang gang! When: tonight, 9pm-ish to 1am-ish, depending on when people are free and have to head home. Lots of carpooling options. Where: Desert northeast of LA, Somewhere near intersectiSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Well yeah well you're funny looking too I'm a kitty friend or you're even bigger cutie pie you're the cutie pie is yep no I'm not I refuse to be quiet I shall tell the world how cute you are holding okay I need Jesus Take Me to ChSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Interlude: Meanwhile in the human world: Did you know that I have a girlfriend in real life who is a Pega sisterSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Applejack and the Absurdity of Equestrian Foreign PolicySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 157: Applejack and the absurdity of going back jack and doing it again aka stop me if you've heard this one AKA there are differences I promiseSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 158: Harbor Neight ToolsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter Florida Hilbert HotelSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
ChatGPTer 42069: Computer attempts to steal my jobSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 42069: Be Gay; Do CrimeSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Chapter 2: Cadance and the Concept of Polyamory, and Also Some Stuff About GeneticsAs I said in the description, I am currently dating all four princesses of Equestria. However, I was also dating Twilight before she became a princess. You might find some stories from back then in this collection too. Since I am only dating these ponies right now and haven't married any of them yet, we don't do anythings that would necessitate this collection having a "Teen" tag. Doing adult married-pony stuff if you're not married is wrong, and I'm a good pony. Cadance, or sometimes Cadence, spelled with an "e", depending on the time of day and the weather conditions, is the princess of love. While she's married to Shining Armor, she also has many other coltfriends. I am lucky to be one of them. While most males in Equestria have harems of sorts, because for some reason we have like three times as many females as males, which makes me suspect we were designed by something other than evolution, like perhaps a marketing department (I'm very smart, so I know this concept is called Fisher's principle.), Cadance is one of the less common females will multiple male partners. And a few female ones too. and a few mail partners too, also known as pen pals. Because we're progressive ponies. Anyway, Cadance doesn't get to spend a lot of time with me because she's busy doing wifey things with her husband and running an empire and whatnot, but she does believe in free love, provided it is backed by clear communication and trust. So when I do get to spend time with her, I enjoy adventuring (princess duties can be tedious) and making out. Author's Note Speaking of trust issues, Cadence and Shiny still have some.
Chapter 5: Angle Bunny is Acute RabbitAngle Bunny wasn't eating his vegetables because he is a very picky eater. So I talked to him. Fluttershy taught me how to talk to animals. I'm not as good as her, but it still worked. I taught him how there are rabbits living in Saddle Arabia who are starving, so he should be thankful for his salad. So he ate it. "Wow, Super, you're so sweet and caring," Fluttershy sang-song as she threw a kiss on the tip of my muzzle. It was nice. I was tired, so I went and took a nap in a cloud. I can't shape clouds as well as pegasi, but they are still very comfortable. Author's Note ~~This chapter should be longer, but I'm pretty tired, and it's not like I'm threatening my downvote/upvote ratio.~~
Chapter 7.5: A gift for EsteeChapter Twenty Eight: In Which Rainbow Dash is Sick and Applejack Bakes Pie Rainbow Dash was sick. Too bad, really; she doesn't deserved to be sick. I mean, most ponies don't, really. Only really bad ponies, like Sombra. He's dead though, so that's a moot point. Anyway, Applejack is a really sweet pony, so she decided to bake an "I'm sorry you're sick" pie for Rainbow Dash. She's really a great pony, even if other ponies are mean to her, and call her mean names like "silly pony" and "background pony". Anyway, do you want to guess the type of pie she baked? I'll give you a minute. That's right she baked an apple pie! I bet you thought she was going to be subversive and bake a blueberry pie or a tofu pot pie!* Nope! Good old fashioned Apple Pie, that good old fashioned Applejack. You thought I was going to tell you how she made it, didn't you? Nope; check the author's notes if you want to know. Anyway, she can't fly, so I carried her to Rainbow's house and she delivered the pie and it was very sweet and we ate the pie together and after we were all full we all made out to make Rainbow Dash feel better. Making out always makes a pony feel better. Author's Note Here's a simple easy Apple Pie recipe: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/219165/chef-johns-easy-apple-pie/ Try making it, and tell me in the comments section how it goes! Please also post pictures of your pie! *Apparently the line of Penny Lane "Four of fish and finger pie" is actually very naughty, so no referencing that in the story! Oops!
