‘’Ugh, where the fuck am I?’’

I opened my eyes, to stare blindly into the lamps shining down on me. It appeared I was in some kind of hospital or something.

Just as I was about to stand up, I realized I couldn’t move my arms. I looked at them, to see them chained to the bed I was lying in. Now I was starting to panic. Where the fuck am I?

I tilted my head to look around the room. The of was left of where the bed was, and there was a table with chair on the right side of the room. That were the only things in the room (except me)

I layed my head back on the pillow of the bed. I shot a few magic beams on the handcuffs that held me on the bed, with no success, which was weird, seeing as the handcuffs should have broke. I was woken from my thoughts when I heard the door towards my room open. I looked up, and saw the main six walking inside.

‘’Okay, is this some kind of prank? Did you do this, Pinkie?’’ I asked half humored and laughing. It was actually a relief to see them. This meant that I was not in danger. They didn’t seem to pick up on my newly found relief, though, as they kept their mouth shut, and simply walked towards me.

‘’Hey, did something happen to your speech or something? Come on, you got me good. Now open the cuffs please.’’

Before I could say anything else, Pinkie reached behind her back, and got a big knife from it.

‘’Uh, what are you going to-’’

Pinkie reared backwards, and started stabbing me.

‘’Pinkie, stop!’’ I yelled. My yelling was immediately followed by screams of pain from me.

‘’Pinkie?! PINKIEAAAAAAAH!’’

…………………………………………………………………………………………………….

I shot out of bed screaming.

‘’Wha- What’s-’’

I recognised the place where I was, and calmed down after that. I stood up, still shaking from the nightmare I just had. I sat back on the bed. I noticed the bed was wet from my sweat.

‘’Probably because of the nightmare...’’ I thought as my heart finally decided to calm down somewhat.
‘’Kevin, it was just a dream. Doesn’t matter that it is the sixth nightmare in a row where one of your friends decides to kill you, it’s still a dream!’’ I said as I laid down in my with sweat covered bed to continue to sleep.

…

‘’I’m not able to sleep anymore tonight, right?’’ I asked to nobody. I waited a few moments

‘’Nope’’ I answered to myself

…………………………………………………………………………………………………….

I awoken to the sun coming through the blinds of my house.

‘’Huh, apparently I did succeed at falling asleep again,’’ I thought by myself.

I yawned, and decided it was time to get out of bed. I threw the blankets from me, and set foot on the cold wooden floor of my bedroom.

‘’Damn, I really need a carpet or something,’’ I said as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes. ‘’This floor is killing me!’’

I stepped from my bed, and walked to the closet. I grabbed the first clothes I could find, put them on, and walked out the bedroom.

I now stood into a small hallway. Next to my room was another room, which was just an extra bedroom. At the end of the hallway, there was another door, leading towards the living room. On the opposite of that room, was my playroom (not like that, you perv!) where I had stacked different games and other things to keep me busy.

I walked into the living room. In the middle of the room stood a couch with a lounge table in front of it. Some distance behind the couch, stood the dinner table. Right next to it, was the kitchen. Only fenced of with the use of a chest high wall. There were a few chairs at the wall as well (I used it as a makeshift bar)

And that was basically my house. Oh, and the shitter was behind another door from the living room. Not to unimportant.

I walked towards the kitchen and turned on the coffee machine. Let me tell you that it was a real pain in the ass to get a coffee machine in Equestria. Apparently, ponies don’t like coffee, so there were no coffee machines in a small village like Ponyville.

After searching the whole damn countryside for one, I eventually gave up and traveled to Canterlot.

And don't you know it: still had to search the whole damn city! Eventually I found a small store experienced in exotic food and drinks. The whole store had a scent of herbs.

It had two types of coffee machines: one really old-fashioned were you had to basically do the whole coffee making progress yourself, or a somewhat modern machine that worked like a regular coffee maker from earth.

The modern one was 150 bits more expensive, but it was worth it, dammit!

It did mean I had to travel to Canterlot once a month to get new coffee for the machine, but hey, you gotta do something for your caffeine addiction.

I woke up from my train of thought by a small beeping sound. I looked at the pot under the machine, which was now filled with the dark liquid. Apparently the coffee was already done for a few minutes.

‘’Must have dozed of,’’ I thought by myself. I took the pot and poured myself a mug of coffee. I opened the fridge, took the milk, and poured some of it in with the coffee.

…

What? I like my coffee with a lot of sugar and milk

…

No, I’m not a sissy!

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

After finishing my coffee and breakfast, I put up my plate and mug, washed them and put them back on the places the belonged. I grabbed my coat, opened the door and went out.

It was beautiful weather outside which was certainly pleasant. I started walking towards the town.

Oh yeah, after the whole ‘setting me free’ part, I was given an house by Celestia, as compensation that I would never see my home planet again

…

Yeah, it was pretty shitty trade, but hey, if a house was the only thing I could get in terms of a compensation, I’ll take it!

But anyway, the house was placed just outside of Ponyville. It was like a few minutes of walking to get into Ponyville from my house, so yeah. It was actually the perfect location, seeing as the damn ponies can get on your nerves, so some distance between them and your house is great in that situation.

I finally reached my destination: the town hall. I walked inside, past ponies waiting in line to get some kind of bureaucratic permit for parties or something, to my office

I opened the door to my office, closed it when inside, and put my coat on the chair behind me in the room. The room had one desk with a chair behind it, and a few file cabinet on either side of the room.

After I put my coat there, I walked to the file cabinet on the left side of the room. I opened it, got the files I needed, and closed the door of the cabinet.

I sat down and started to work.

This was my daily routine for at least five days a week. Looking over permits and making sure that everything is in place

It sounds as exciting as it is. But now that I’m not a genie anymore, I can’t just poof up stuff like I used to. So I need something to pay the bills, and this was the only job I was qualifiable enough to do.

‘’As soon as I find another job, I’ll quit right away,’’ I thought by myself.

Truth was, I could get another job at Sugarcube Corner, but I totally suck at baking. And the cakes were scared that I might scare customers.

Damn racists

… wait, it’s not like I’m another race. Damn humanists.

...Wait, that’s not what I mean, dammit!

But while boring, that was not the worst part of the job.

‘’Hey Kevin!’’

‘’God, not now!’’

The door to my office opened, and there stood a very angry unicorn.

‘’Why the hay didn’t you fix the Janson permits yet?!’’ He almost shouted at me.

This was seriously the most annoying boss ever. You know the kind I’m talking about. Who are always shouting and putting the blame on his workers.

‘’Well, you told me the reports of Tuesday had priority over the-’’

‘’Stop making up excuses, you worthless foal! Everypony would know to finish the Janson permits first! Don’t put this on me!’’

The anger I felt was intense, but I thought I masked it well.

‘’I’m sorry, boss. I’ll finish them right now,’’ I said as nicely as possible. The pony walked outside of my office to let me get to work again.

‘’How does that fucking asshole think he can talk to me like that? I have more power in one finger then he has in whole his damn body! I could fucking destroy him if I wanted.’’

I stood up from my chair, walked to the cabinet again, took out the Janson permits and started working on them.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

After hours of work on the damn files, I finally finished the Janson permits. I stood up and walked to the lunch room.

And wouldn’t you know it: no tea left. Fucking great!

I walked back to my office. I snapped my fingers and made a small sandwich. Luckily for me, there was a sandwich spell.

Yeah I know, how does a spell so specific even exist?

I came into my office, took the files from the table, and walked to my boss his office while still eating the sandwich.

I knocked on the door of his office, and walked inside. He was sitting at his way bigger desk working on what other paperwork.

He glanced up from his paperwork for a second, and once realizing it was me, immediately got back to his work.

‘’What do you want, Kevin?’’ He said while not looking up from his paper again.

‘’I came to bring you the Janson permits,’’ I said to him.

‘’Finally,’’ He said while yanking the files from my hands with his magic. ‘’Now I can give my peers what they wanted to have tomorrow.’’

‘’So you didn’t even need the files today, you fucking asshole’’

I turned around and tried to walk out as fast as possible to make sure this asshole wouldn’t say anything else to me, but luck didn’t really like me today. As I was almost out of his office he called my name again.

‘’Kevin, are you almost done with the files from Tuesday?’’

‘’You GOT to be kidding me?’’

‘’You told me that I needed to drop those for the Janson permits,’’ I told him as I turned around to face him again. ‘’So no, I’m not almost done with the files from Tuesday,’’ I tried saying as calmly as possible

‘’That’s gonna be a late night then, cause I need those files today!’’ He yelled at me. ‘’ So I would go back to your office and start working if I were you!’’

Something snapped inside my head.

‘’Then why did you told me to drop the files hours ago for the Janson report you needed TOMORROW?!’’ I yelled at him.

‘’Don’t you talk to me like that! I’m your boss, I-’’

‘’No, fuck you!’’ I yelled at him. He was clearly taken aback by my language.

‘’You yell at me for giving Tuesday files the priority, while you gave me the order to do so yesterday, then I do the Janson permits, while you need them tomorrow! And now I need to work late again? I barely have time for myself!’’

‘’I am your boss, and you will listen to what I-’’

‘’Don’t you even fucking start, you asshole! You and I know I’m a fucking god with my powers and that I could end you with one snap of my fingers. If someone should listen, it’s you!’’

Now he was truly angry. He jumped up from his chair started yelling even harder than he did now

‘’Get out of my office, you’re fired!’’

‘’Oh, good luck finding anybody stupid enough to want to work under your bullshit,’’ I yelled back at him

‘’GET OUT!!!’’ He yelled

I shot a beam of magic out of my hands that hit the guy right in the head. The beam I fired made him shrink to the size of a rat.

‘’Wha- hey, make me normal!’’ He yelled. I walked towards him and picked him up.

‘’Not so strong now, huh?’’ I yelled in his face. I then proceeded to threw the guy trough the office. You could hear his small scream as he smacked on the floor on the other side of the room.

Oh, and by the way,'' I said while my boss was lying on ground in pain, ''this is how many fucks I give about the report!'' I shot a beam of fire out of my hand that destroyed the report that I was working on the whole day.

‘’Goodbye!’’ I yelled as I slammed the door shut while walking away.

Author's Note

Here I am again. After being for a whole year, I'm back to writing.