The Last Moron On Earth

After an agonizingly long drive down the dusty desert track, I'd reached the old gas station again, and set about pumping gas into the tank. The tag on the fuel pump had said it moved anywhere from 10 to 15 ounces per stroke, there were like...I dunno, a hundred or so ounces in a gallon, and I knew a Silverado gas tank was 26 gallons. Doing the math in my head, this equated to a fuckin' bunch of cranking ahead of me.  I should really go look for an electric pump, I mused.

I mean, I could use gas to fuel a generator to run the pump, which would get me gas for the generator in an endless cycle of...okay, enough stalling.

It honestly took me a lot less time that I'd expected, only about twenty minutes or so, to fill up the tank. Twenty minutes of absolute suck. In the week I'd been stealing gas, I'd never had to fill a tank from empty before, and vowed to never do it again, because it really, really sucked. My arm-hoof-leg things were a bit sore after performing the repetitive task mindlessly for such a stretch of time.

Stomach grumbling in protest of its neglect, I saw my way into the little convenience-store. I don't know how Winter and her group got in without smashing anything, but they were kind enough to leave the door unlocked. Kind enough to, oh wow, to leave some money on the counter for anything they took earlier. Weirdo.

Breakfast was a lukewarm canned-tea and a tin of assorted nuts; I was finally moving up in this world. You know, there were some severe downsides to everyone disappearing, and the dollar menu's disappearance was one of them. C'est la vie, I guess. Still, I'd managed to last some time on snacks and the most basic of foods. Guess this body runs on good vibes, sunshine, and edible garbage. Sweet.

On the subject of good vibes, I was drawing my shitty meal out as long as I could, given my reluctance to return to her.

I was never any good at reading people, but she was just...off. She spoke utter nonsense and traveled halfway across SoCal in a rickety wooden cart full of kids; there was nothing right about that. But she didn't look half dead, and didn't have a car, so I'd be a fool to not group up with her, despite her dementia and creepiness.

Life is just a series of shitty compromises and all. Womp womp.

Stowing more snack-foods and a few overpriced drinks in my pack, I packed everything into the cab and set off to rejoin her little group.

A bright flash as I crested a hill forced me to narrow my eyes, lest they fry in the sun's harsh glare. Seriously these weird sunglasses sucked, all they did was turn everything piss yellow and they looked dumb as hell; they didn't even provide help in low light as advertised. I was so glad I didn't pay for them like a chump. As I rolled down the gentle slope to the visitor's center, I could make out the children chasing each other across the parking lot. I killed the engine and made my way to the mysterious Winter.

"You came back," she muttered incredulously to herself. "You actually came back."

"Of course I'd come back, I replied with a snort. "You're like, the first person I've encountered in days. We've got to stick together."

She almost broke a grin, until I continued, "Plus, you've sorta got a plan or something. I've mostly just been driving around doing dick-all. Thats a phrase people say, right? Dick-all....er, whatever, I think that makes up for the crazy dream talk and the creepy kids thing you got going on." Oh, if looks could kill....

Seeking a distraction, I opted to try and have her answer some questions. Namely, why she chose to walk across SoCal. Though there weren't too many cars out, they were still easy picking. I didn't want to mention that this was, like, the fourth truck I'd stolen, but I think I hinted pretty strongly at it. I mean, I made sure to use 'liberated' and 'scavenged', though I doubt it helped my case. Regardless, her response was that she was a freshman in high school. After some incredulous prodding, she went on to elaborate that she'd gotten by everywhere on the bus or riding shotgun; she hadn't even gotten her learner's permit. So, in addition to being unwilling to steal someone's car (but strangely okay with swiping some hipster's market cart, the hypocrite) she was sort of unable to drive herself.

Frankly, I found the situation rather ridiculous.

I mean, first off, who's going to care if you take a car? Everyone was gone! And with that, thats the perfect place to learn to drive! She just punched me with a huff, and we were quiet for once.

It was a pretty awkward silence, with only the kid's and a light wind making any noise. Seeking to further conversation, I asked about them.

She'd said she found them within her city, after a day of wandering, and gathered them up, seeking to wait until someone came to help. Power finally went out, and she realized there was no going back. Just as lost as any of them, she 'prayed for a miracle', which was answered in her dreams. Crazy, right? She insists that some magic alien horse god (because any *one** of those on its own wasn't unbelievable enough) is responsible for all of this, and urging those of us left behind to gather at who-knows-where. *Finally getting somewhere with this one...

"I'm pretty sure you were making allegations regarding my sweet ride, what was that about?"

"Well, last night I had her visit me again in my sleep. She told me that there was someone out there, someone who 'slipped through the cracks' and was out there doing harmful things. When she appears though, it isn't...clear, I guess is the word to use. She said it had something to do with human dreams being different than what she was used to, it didn't really make sense. She tried explaining it, all of it, but all I remember is her anger. She was really, really mad, but also a little scared, I think..."

I laughed at that, and saw an opportunity to deflect. "So, the alien goddess had decided on a whim to wipe a majority of the human population from the face of the planet, and turned the remainders into some really weird shit. She then talks, albeit poorly, with some of them briefly, tells them to gather somewhere, and is afraid of someone she left behind? The fuck's up with that?"

She was completely expressionless. Her glistening emerald eyes wavered in the early noon sun. Her lips moved with careful deliberation and said, "I'm not so sure that its one of us she's afraid of. I, ah, I see things, when I sleep."

Well no shit. I'm certain she meant something else, but I had to go for it. "Yeah, we've discussed this, those are called dreams. We all have them, but some of us can't remember them."

With a turn of her head, she gave me that look. Everyone always gave me that look. The 'stop talking' look.

"There's something I see when I sleep," she finally confided, softening her gaze. "Not just the Princess, something else. Something else alive. At least, I think She's alive. She feels...its hard to say....she terrifies me."

"Well....I mean, its only a dream." I said. I'm not sure who I was trying to assure.

"Yeah. Only a dream." She trailed off into silence once again.

I preferred when she was yelling at me.