Why Humans Shouldn't be Allowed in Equestria

We bowed and exited to the hall, collecting ourselves to head back to Ponyville. Once we got a house for all of us and future rescues we'd head out again. We didn't have time to lose. Being too late for one was too many already. “Nice name.” I looked down at little Butterfly. “Why'd you pick it?”

“This is a new life for me.” She had one of the biggest smiles I'd seen.

“Good reason.” Looks like we were all pretty happy right now. “What did you do with her Aranea? Couldn't see anything, so must be a changeling thing.”

“It was a 'changeling thing', so to speak. I altered the 'rules' for imparting information. Now changelings connected to the hive will have much more knowledge. A decision made of free will requires knowledge. To offer a decision with free will while withholding information denies true free will. Perhaps I should have shifted the path of knowledge earlier.”

“We're just starting here. Changing the rules blind could've caused some kind of problem later. Probably the earliest you could've done that. Heh, wish I could learn stuff like that.”

“Queen Aranea and Nohbodi, return at once!” echoed through the hall. Oh shit.

“Wait here Butterfly, and keep the papers with you.”

We reentered the audience chamber to find Luna and Celestia looking over scrolls. “Out of the royal grant we supplied there is a considerable cost that has been allocated to clothing. Explain this discrepancy at once!” I actually calmed down a bit at hearing that.

“That one's easy to explain. You remember the first encounter with the guards?”

“Yes. They have been dealt with according to my announced decision on that day.”

“Well, the clothes we had were beyond repair after that, especially Aranea's.”

“And what is your point ? Clothing is not required in Equestria.”

“Tell me princess, is it legal for a pony to be unsheathed or display parts in public?”

“Certainly not! There may be foals about.”

“Exactly. Remember that humans don't sheath like a pony. We needed clothes that'd cover. Otherwise we'd be a walking display through Canterlot. You wouldn't want that, now would you?”

“Your rebuttal is understood and accepted as a reasonable explanation. However, did you have to spend so much on these trappings?”

“It, ah, was the first place we saw that looked like it sold clothes.”

“Oh. Well, in light of this testimony, we will not levy the cost to you. However, to prevent such future expenditures, you are to procure the necessary replacements when a more fiscally reasonable option presents itself. Are we clear?”

“Yes princess.”

“Very good. You are once again dismissed.”

The thought of Aranea's age flashed through my head again, only temporarily stopped by the courts.

“Um, princesses? Can I ask one more thing while I'm here?”

“No. If it is not a matter of national importance, it will require the standard permissions to see the court at another time.”

“Uh, it involves a federal offense?”

Luna didn't like the sound of that. “Speak quickly.”

“You see – man this is uncomfortable – changelings don't grow up like ponies or humans. So they're all really young. Like a few years old. That means that they can't do anything that adults can do, even though they're grown up.”

“This does not involve law to the degree you gave the impression of. Leave us and send such a request at another time, through the proper channels.”

Aranea came to my defense. “Your majesties, this is extremely troubling to Nohbodi. Will you hear us out, at the request of a queen?”

Luna thought on this. “...I did not expect such a plea. You are the queen of the changelings, and are held to be a representative of a nation we are technically at war with. That brings issues of it's own, that the leader of such is a citizen. This is an unprecedented combination”

We looked at each other. I really hadn't thought about that. Of course with no treaty ponies and changelings would be in a cease-fire, at best.

Aranea took a step forward. “Then as queen and representative of the changelings, I wish to discuss terms of peace with Equestria. It is known by both changeling and pony that the previous queen, Chrysalis, was a despot, who did not act in accordance with the current administration.”

Well, this took a different direction fast enough to give me whiplash. That hive-memory thing is awesome. A princess and probably a couple of lawyers and she's got hundreds, if not thousands, of years of politics to play with. It's not the magical power making her the most dangerous thing here. Changelings being natural actors only makes it better. Wonder how much she shared with Butterfly?

Celestia and Luna looked at each other.

“We will commence discussion on your offers of peace. Remain while we deliberate.” Followed by them both retreating out of a door behind the thrones.

We waited with baited breath. This could be bigger than just finding the few survivors. We were either going to be heralded as emissaries of peace, or harbingers of an epic international faux pas. There never seemed a lot of middle ground when Luna was involved. I looked at Aranea. I tend to forget she's a literal queen. Good thing it's not me. I'd start another war or something after ten minutes of saying the wrong thing. The royal pair came back and sat back down in the twin thrones. Celestia made the announcement this time.

“In light of the cessation of violence by the changeling empire, and the actions of their new queen, we will gladly accept the prospects of peace talks, for the betterment of both of our nations.” Aranea was ecstatic. “We will set a date for the first talks for two weeks from this day.”

Too much time. “What about the changelings in hiding? We can't find another dead body!”

Celestia was taken aback by that. Luna just got angry. “You are not a member of the royalty or designated representative thereof!” Well, she was right. Much as I spent time with Aranea, and we were - for all intents and purposes - a couple, nothing was official. I shut my mouth, thinking I'd be lucky if this didn't fuck up the biggest thing we'd – well, her – had ever been a part of. Celestia intervened.

“Due to the current crisis involving refugee changelings, I will – effective immediately – author a decree that all discovered or willing changelings be given a safe place until we've completed the negotiations. The citizens of any nation shouldn't have to live in fear, when possible.”

Well, she just did our job for us. Good thing too. I really don't think us two could find them all, and that would mean more that were found too late.

Aranea bowed deeply. “Thank you princesses. I cannot say how much this means to me, and for future changelings.” More satisfied than we thought possible, we finally exited the chamber for good. Butterfly was waiting for us, kind of nervous at how long it took.

“What happened that took so long?”

Aranea smiled down at her subject. “Something wonderful.” Butterfly's eyes lit up. Of course she'd take the direct route of communication to another changeling. I already knew everything from having just heard it, but it would've been nice to hear good news being passed on.

The train ride back to Ponyville was oddly quiet. I guess we were all absorbed in thought over what this mean, and what could possibly happen. We quickly made our way back to Twilight's castle and knocked. Spike answered again.

“Coming!” It's interesting how easily those doors must swing to let that tiny guy open them. The brain focuses on the smallest things sometimes, when bigger things should be occupying it. Then hey saw Butterfly. “A changeling!?” Oh yeah, Aranea was human whenever Spike was here. He knew she was a changeling, but actually seeing one was probably a bad trip.

“She's with us. You'll get used to it.”

“Uh, okay.” He let us in. Folks here are going to have to get used to seeing changelings a lot more often, and probably quick. “Twilight, it's Nohbodi and Aranea! And another changeling.”

“You two, great news!” Twilight came rushing towards us. “Er, you three.” She was more used to the concept. “I collated and finalized the interview into a study on changeling customs while you were in Canterlot. Every university with an inter-species study department wanted copies!”

“Uh, cool. We've got great news too-holy shit that's a big bag.” Every college wanted them alright. I have no idea how many bits that was, but it was a fortune.

Twilight huffed. “Watch your language around the young ones!” Meaning Spike, of course.

“Yeah, sorry. How much is that?”

“Your shares of the profits. So what was your news?” She said it like it was just regular good news. Man, she must be tenured by Celestia or something. This looks like at least ten years' worth of pay to me, before taxes. I think. It's hard to count a mountain. And coins that are actual gold. Aranea answered Twilight while I was drooling at the glittering stash.

“We have begun peace talks with Equestria, for the restoration of changeling-pony relations. In addition, they will find the changelings hiding and keep them safe until the end of the talks, at least. Oh, the hive can re-join itself, and we can live in peace with the ponies here!”

Twilight was stunned. “Wow! I never thought it'd be possible. Congratulations! After the visits to Saddle Arabia, the changes in the Griffin Kingdom, and the improving relations with Yakyakistan, too! We're looking forward to a great age for Equestria.” Well, she is the princess of friendship. Being a one-pony ambassador to their own country gives a unique view on international relations I guess. Not that I disagreed with her. Even if I had no idea what any of those nations were like.

I looked at the stash again and thought on what's been going on. I already knew I loved her, but it wasn't official... “Hey, Twilight.”

“Yes Nohbodi?”

“Wouldn't happen to have a tape measure and some scratch paper, would you?”

Twilight was a bit confused at the request. “Alright... Rarity left one here some time ago, she's got dozens of spares. Writing materials are everywhere here, that's the easy part.” In a minute she came back with a sheet of paper, a quill, and a tape measure.

“Perfect. Aranea, can you hold out that finger?” Pointing to her ring finger on the left hand.

“Why do you require this?” She was still doing it, even while asking why. I put the measure around it at the base and jotted down the numbers on every scale of measurement it had.

“You'll see soon enough. You're gonna love it!” Turning back to Twilight. “Wow, with all this, we can finally get our own place too.” I hated sponging off of others for basic stuff. Not like we were asking a few bucks to pay back, it was a roof over our heads. There's a difference. “Everything's gonna be fine, right Aranea?”

Aranea smiled. “It does seem so. Let us hope for the best.” I hugged her and gave a quick kiss.

“I'll be back soon to see about what kind of house that can get. Just need a bit of my part. I grabbed a few fistfuls and a small bag and ran out, to the confusion of the rest in the room.

Naturally I ran to the jeweler. I showed him the numbers I had down. He was confused.

“Goodness, you must really love your pets.” Pets? You dumb son-of-a... Yeah, yeah. I held up my pointer finger for him to see.

“No. Human fingers are thin like that. I already know this'll be special-order.”

He figured it out pretty quickly. Mostly. “Ah, sorry! So it's for you. What style would you like?”

“Actually it's two. Well, two for those sizes and one for me. Gonna need this one-” holding up my ring finger. “measured too. How fast do you think you can get them done?”

“Hmmm... Well, this isn't the season for orders yet. Maybe a week to a week and a half? At least, depending on what comes up for such an unusual size.” I looked over what he had for materials. Lacking any proper ideas, I stuck to the standard gold and diamond stuff.

“Listen, this one is the important one, for now anyway. Only one I need right away. Can you do that?”

“And the others?”

“Plenty of time for those. Gotta make plans after the first you know.”

He smiled at the impending joy. “Of course. That'll be...” Man, gems and gold are cheap here. Well, relatively anyway.

“Thanks. Sorry if I gotta run. You get the idea.”

“Of course. Can't keep that special somepony waiting.” I ran back to the castle.

As soon as I was let in I hugged Aranea again. “What did you require so quickly?”

“Important stuff. You'll see.”