Election Day in Ponyville is quickly approaching, and the town is electric with election buzz. From what you've heard, Mayor Mare is running uncontested...again. Who elese would even challenge her? Well, you get that answer pretty quickly when Twilight approaches you one fine morning, campaign posters in hoof. You look from them, then back to her, then back at them again.

"Twilight...are you running for Mayor?"

She nods, grinning widely and extend the stack of posters to you. You don't take them and just look at her incredulously.

"But...Twilight, you're already a princess. Why would you even..."

"I'm bored, princesses don't do shit but sit around and tell people to do things. Maybe shaming an older mare by beating her at the only thing her curie mark says she's good at will make me feel better!"

Wow, way to be a cunt, Twilight.

"Anyway," she goes on. "Want to be by campaign manager, Anon?"

Huh, now there's a thought. You had intended to masturbate today, but why the hell not?

"Sure," you say with a resigned sigh. "But Spike has to do all the work for me, I'm just going to talk to people and tell them you're not terrible."

Spike opens his mouth to protest, but before he can speak, Twilight is already congratulating you and telling you what exactly she wants done. You watch in muted satisfaction as Spke sighs and slinks away to go make new posters. That's what he gets for eating your sandwich last Tuesday. You don't just forget things like that.

You're off handing out "Vote For Princess Twilight" pins when Mayor Mare first sees Twilight setting about her campaign activities. She's putting up posters along all the walls of town hall, even covering the windows and doors, humming quietly to herself. She doesn't even notice as the current Mayor approaches, and only turns when Mayor Mare clears her throat for the third time. Then at least she does turn and smiles warmly. Mayor Mare smiles back...but less warmly.

"What have we here?" she says. "What are you doing Princess, Twilight?"

Twilight smiles confidently and gestures grandly towards her still dripping, pasted handiwork.

"Oh, just thought I'd put my hoof in the ring for mayor this year. Nothing wrong with a little friendly competition, right? I mean," she goes on, laughing to herself a little. "You're getting old anyway, isn't it time someone else took over for you?

The Mayor smiles slowly until her grin covers most of her face. Twilight smiles back, and begins to chuckle again. Mayor Mare chuckles too. They laugh together, smiling and guffawing away, as the Mayor slowly approaches the princess.

Then, without warning, Mayor Mare leaps forward with a battlecry. Twilight, unprepared, falls to the ground shrieking. Before she can even begin to use magic, the Mayor tramples Twilight's face with her hooves, laughing and crying hysterically. She stomps and stamps until there is nothing but fragments of skull and brain matter.

Citizens stop what they're doing to watch in horror at the Mayor reaches down with her teeth and tears out Twilight's trachea. Someone in the crowd vomits violently at the sound of the mayor grinding through the thick, rubbery substance. She chews it, tears and snot streaming down her face, blending into one sticky mess. Then, with trembling hooves, she reaches down into the mass of red and places Twilight's crown atop her head. As an addition, she plucks out Twilight's severed horn as well, and fixes it to the crown.

"Finally..." she groans in ecstasy over the gurgle of Twilight's twitching form.

The purple princess twitches once more, then lies still.

Panting, the Mayor turns slowly to face the terrified crowd. She spits out Twilight's mangled flesh. A few ponies faint, but most just stand still, parilized by horror. The Mayor'r eyes dance as she looks to each one of them in turn.

"All you little fuckers better realize, there's only one mayor in this town..." she says in a low, menacing voice.

She steps forward and the crowd retreats from her, trembling.

"ONLY. FUCKING. ONE!"

Everyone votes for Mayor Mare during the election.

And where were you for all of this? Why, you were still going door to door. Turns out some power-hungry pony ladies SOMEHOW (wink) heard that YOU were running for mayor. I wonder how they'd hear that? Anyway, you've offered to help their business in exchange for some "extra support." And by support, you mean pussy.

And Spike? What became of him?

Who fucking cares.

-End-

Author's Note

In honor of all this horrible election nonsense, here you go.