Two Background Ponies Revisit Season Five

Maid in Manehattan

By this point, Sam was so nervous that his fate was sealed that he was sweating bullets. It didn't help that the moment they walked back into the courtroom after the recess for closing statements, the bailiff pony immediately began to advance to take him away, only for him to pause and say: "Oh wait...they have to actually say it out loud first..." As he nervously returned to his seat and looked around, watching and waiting for Princess Celestia to enter, he finally swallowed and leaned over to Haybeus.

"So...is this it? Am I doomed?"

"Well son," The large stallion answered. "There's only, ah say, there's only one idea left that ah got now."

"You already made your closing statement... Isn't it a little late for that?"

"Ah had ta' make ah' call 'r two, but just, ah say, just sit tight ah moment longer. There's ah way we'll get ya' outta this one yet."

Before Sam could ask anything else, the door to the back of the room opened, prompting him and everypony else immediately to stand. Having hastily adjusted her mane as best as she could, Princess Celestia once again walked back into the court and took her position. After doing so, she paused to take in a deep breath and then sat erect.

"Sam Listens-To-Carl's-Problems, rise."

Swallowing again and trembling, Sam slowly got to his feet along with Haybeus.

"In view of the testimony and evidence, as well as the magnitude of the crime," Celestia exhaled gravely. "I have no choice but to find you-"

Before she could finish, however, a dull-yet-rising noise cut her off...the sound of rather intense arguing coming outside the door to the court. It started off low, but quickly grew into the sound of a mob. Celestia's gaze shifted at that as both she and everypony else in the courtroom heard it, before they all began to look up and to the back. Sam included among them.

"What in Equestria...?"

Abruptly, the noise reached its zenith, and suddenly the doors burst open. An assortment of mares, stallions, and all manner of other sentient-and-semi-sentient creatures forming an angry mob immediately flooded the room, pouring into the aisle and making their way forward toward the front of the court. Everypony present reacted in shock as they shouted and stamped their hooves or whatever as their procession went up to the front of the room, roaring so loudly and making such a din that it was impossible to concentrate on anything else. As things grew more and more chaotic, Celestia held out her gilded hooves and began to call out.

"Everypony, settle down! Settle down!" She shouted ineffectively. "What is the meaning of this?"

The crowd died down long enough at that for one gray-coated stallion in large glasses to come forward frowning.

"The meaning? The meaning?!" He shouted back in a weak, trembling, and yet forceful voice. "The meaning is we demand to be heard! We demand justice!"

Celestia looked down to him. "And...who are you, sir?"

"Shill! Silver Shill, your highness! And just because my eyes aren't as large as most mares...my color scheme isn't as cute or intricate...I don't have a sweet little voice...my jaw has a horrendous underbite...and I don't wear an adorable little collar that somewhat resembles that of a Japanese schoolgirl...not to mention my lesson about honesty wasn't terribly noteworthy...doesn't diminish my right to exist as a pony! I refuse to be sentenced to the annals of history because I'm not a mare that combines the shyness of Fluttershy with the fashion sense of Rarity!"

"Just because I'm fat and he's ugly, and it's debatable whether or not we're foals or just stupid stallions, doesn't mean you can use us for pure comic relief or whenever you need dumb minions either!" A squat, fat young pony with scissors for a Cutie Mark shouted in agreement as his misshapen friend with a snail for a Cutie Mark nodded. "We have dignity!"

"And I don't care if I look like a jellybean with legs!" An obese mare shouted over the growing roar. "This country needs better representation of body types of all sorts and not conform to one pony standard of beauty!"

"Fat Pony is right!"

"Think of a better name for me than 'Fat Pony'!"

"Er...um...Melissa NeighCarthy?"

"...It'll do for now. The point being is just because we're poorly designed, don't have stand-out personality traits, and/or may have been created just for a cheap gimmick rather than serious marketing doesn't negate who we are and our right to a fair representation in this world! Ugly ponies matter!"

Immediately, the entire crowd began to chant the same thing, soon sending it booming through the courtroom. When this happened, Haybeus immediately leaned in next to Sam and whispered in his ear.

"Now's your chance, boy. Run for it."

The blue stallion turned to him in surprise. "Ex...excuse me?!"

"Crystal Empire border is 200 miles thataway. Make it there and yer home free."

Sam was aghast. "What the...?! You want me to go fugitive?!"

"It's that, ah say, it's that or Tartarus, boy! Now run! Run like ah six-legged gingerbread man!"

Sam winced. He hesitated a moment, looking at the angry crowd, everypony else being distracted, and the way clear...and, finally, as Haybeus kept ribbing him, he turned and broke for the door. Unfortunately, he only got about halfway there at full gallop before the bailiff managed to spot him over the crowd.

"Hey...he's running for it!" He shouted as loud as he could over the din.

Not able to stop now, Sam just grit his teeth, kept running, and pushed through the crowd nearest the door to charge outside.

The central area of the Canterlot Courthouse was crowded with both members of the latest angry mob as well as all manner of other ponies on business or awaiting their own trials. Confused, disorientated, and now panicked, Sam had to look around for a moment, trying to find the way to the exit. He glanced only a few moments before behind him a yell came from the courtroom to whatever guards were stationed in the hall to stop him, alerting the two ones nearest the door who also happened to spot him as he came out, prompting him to take off as fast as he could.

In an effort to try and lose them, he quickly shot to and weaved through another group of ponies coming out of a different court, this one carrying away two producer ponies in chains to enact their sentence for embezzlement.

"I don't understand how we 'went right'!" One cried as he passed. "Who would have thought a play about a costume designer unable to get orders done in time would be a success?"

At any rate, the pursuing guards got caught up in the mess, allowing Sam to gain some distance. He angled himself, spotting daylight from the entryway leading outside, and tried to head for it, only to cry out a moment later as he tripped over a pony leaning against a wall nearby. After crashing to the ground, he grunted, shook his mane, and began to rise and look back to who he had tripped on, and spotted a bum stallion who noticed him at the same time. His eyes widened.

"Hey! You're that stallion who murdered his friend!" Immediately, he cupped a hoof to his mouth and readied to cry out.

Swallowing, Sam quickly yelled the only thing he could think of. "Uh...look! It's Rarity!" He said, pointing.

The bum cut himself off, and went furious. "That unicorn ruined my shoe business by giving all my customers better ones for free!" He screamed before running in that direction. Sam quickly yanked himself back to his feet and ran again.

The crowd soon thinned out, revealing the open archway. He could see Canterlot and its gardens and spires just beyond, and he put on as much speed as he could to try and reach it...

Only for two pegasi guards with spears to suddenly slam down in his path and cross them in front of them.

"Stop right there, Listens-to-Carl's-Problems!"

Wincing, Sam quickly slammed his hooves down and ground to a halt. He nearly turned to go back...only to find six more royal guards quickly running up behind him and surrounding him. Sweating and panicking, the blue stallion looked around himself, but saw no escape. He was trapped.

As the stallion continued to look around himself at the stern faces waiting for him to make a move, one of the pegasi boomed out at him. "There's no way out of this. You're in the middle of Canterlot. Did you really think you could slip past the royal guard?"

Sam continued to look around a bit longer, still looking fearful,  realizing he was trapped and that there was no fate for him now than being thrown into an otherworldly realm/prison. Yet as he stood there looking around, he gradually calmed. His eyes slowly shut, and the rest of his tension faded as he let out a long sigh. His head fell to the ground.

"...If Carl were here, I'm sure right now he'd make some sort of comment in response to that about how considering how ineffective the royal guard has been, escaping them shouldn't have been a problem. But he's not here..."

His eyes slowly opened as he kept looking to the ground.

"...He's not here because I shot him in the head."

The guards reacted a bit to that, as did a growing crowd of ponies having spotted a fugitive running for it and now moving in to get a look. Sam sighed again.

"Yes, I did it. I'm tired of trying to pretend I didn't. I deserve to be thrown into Tartarus or banished and thrown into a dungeon where I get banished to. Because I can't live like this anymore. Even though I shot him, Carl was my friend. More than that...he was my reason for existence. My name is literally 'Sam Listens-to-Carl's-Problems'. What is a Sam Listens-to-Carl's-Problems without a Carl to listen to?" He looked up. "Nothing. Nothing at all. In the grand scheme of things I might just be somepony in the background...but I'm always a pony paired with somepony else. And now that the somepony else isn't here...I'm nothing. And I can't go the rest of my life both incomplete and hiding from my crime."

Stepping forward up to one of the pegasi guards, Sam looked up at him.

"...I don't want to get off for a 'tearful apology' or 'lesson' either. Because I committed a horrible crime, and I deserve whatever I get. So...take me away or whatever. I'm done."

The guard looked a bit uncertain at that. All of them did, looking a bit uneasily to one another. At last, he turned and looked to his partner. The pegasi stared a moment, but in the end closed his eyes and gave a grim nod. Forcing a stern face, the pegasi guard began to advance on Sam...

When a small electronic jingle sounding like "The Smile Song" went out. At once, Sam blinked and looked up in surprise. Everypony else did as well. As the jingle kept going off...eventually the blue stallion grimaced and turned a bit red in the face.

"I...uh...had to borrow my wife's phone while I was in Canterlot because her plan had better coverage..."

Swallowing, he reached for his side and pulled out a seashell.

One of the guards raised an eyebrow. "...A cellular seashell?"

Sam grimaced. "That's something Carl would say...and I pointed out to him we have cellular books."

The guard blinked. "...True."

Sighing, Sam flipped it open and pressed a button to put it on speaker. "Um, whoever you are, this really isn't that good of a time... I'm about to be taken away to a hellish dungeon for the rest of my natural life and I'd rather use my one phone call to tell Dawn I-"

"Sam, be quiet! Just tell all of those ponies to bring you back to Ponyville! Right away!"

The blue stallion quirked an eyebrow. "...Who is this?"

"Who do you think, Sam? It's Carl!"

To be concluded...

On a train headed from Manehattan to Ponyville, a dusty cowgirl pony and a fashionista unicorn bored-ly looked out the window. Both were nearly nodding off and quiet.

"...Say, Applejack?"

"Yeah, Rarity?"

"Did anything about that trip seem particularly...unusual?"

The cowgirl thought for a moment. "...Nope."

Rarity frowned. "That's what I thought..."

Not one Charlie Brown joke! Can you believe it?

Sam, I didn't actually die when you shot me...did I?

...What?

Huh? What's wrong, Sam?

Carl, you just asked me if you didn't actually die back when I shot you.

What? No I didn't...

...

...Did I?