It was nearly midnight when Twilight landed on her balcony. The chill of the winter night made her shiver a little as her gaze swept across the houses of Ponyville below. Warm lights from households celebrating Hearth’s Warming Eve dotted the darkness, reminding her of how alone she and Sunset were that night while families came together on the holiday.

She pushed her head against the glass door and entered her room. Walking up to her desk, she picked up the journal with her magic, intending to send Sunset a message immediately. The symbol on the cover caught her attention. It was the most famous cutie-mark in Equestria, the eight-flared sunburst of Princess Celestia.

How did I not notice this? Sunset Shimmer has almost the exact same cutie-mark as her mother...

The purple aura flipped the book open to the last page. Twilight dragged a quill to it and wrote.

Sunset, I have to talk to you right away. It’s important.

She looked out of her room while she awaited Sunset's response. The castle was completely silent. Twilight realized that it was far past Spike's bedtime, and that he had to be asleep by then, so she headed down the corridor to his room to check on him. Peeking in through the door, she saw his adorable form lying on his little bed, chest slowly rising and falling as he snored softly. Twilight smiled as she thought about how diligently he had woken her and prepared her lunch a few hours before, and realized that Spike had always been there for her when she needed him. After the talk she just had with Princess Celestia, Twilight felt grateful for the little dragon's support over the years.

Heading back to her room, she opened a desk drawer, within which was a pile of rubies that she had been intending to slowly dole out to him as rewards. Next to her desk was a box filled with leftover gift supplies that she had used days earlier to wrap the presents for her friends, so Twilight chose a large box and stuffed it with the entire contents of the drawer. She hoped that Spike wouldn't mind an unwrapped addition to his gift, but she didn't want to wake him with the crinkling of wrapping paper.

Twilight levitated the journal over to herself and checked it. Sunset had not replied.

Why doesn't she have her journal with her?

Quietly, she made her way though the dark castle downstairs to her laboratory, where she had left the Crystal Mirror. She put the journal into its position and powered the device. It came to life with a slow hum and crackling magical arcs as the portal opened.

Twilight stepped through.

It was snowing. Twilight realized too late that the dress she was wearing had come with her, and the material did little to shield her from the cold. She thought of going back into the castle, but having to tromp up to her room for warm clothes would risk waking Spike. So she put the discomfort out of her mind and hurried towards the boarding-house, cursing the unwieldiness of the dress as she ran.

As Twilight approached the boarding-house, she noticed from afar that the lights in Sunset's dormitory were off. She headed up the staircase and opened the door.

There was no one there.

She turned around and looked out into the empty compound. There were some lights from a couple of the dorms farther away, but no other signs of life. The stillness was almost eerie.

Where could she be?

Twilight entered the dormitory and turned the lights on, seeking any hint of where Sunset Shimmer could have gone. She walked into Sunset's room and noticed that lying on the messy table was a satchel from which came a telltale fuchsia glow and a distinctive buzz, explaining her lack of a reply earlier. Twilight ignored it, looking around the rest of the room. The comforter and blanket had been returned to the neatly made bed, but everything else seemed exactly the same as it was the day before. Even the jacket was untouched.

The jacket...

Twilight couldn’t remember a day when Sunset Shimmer went out without that black leather jacket. And yet the girl obviously wasn’t in her dormitory.

Unless… oh my gosh, I think I know where Sunset is.

Twilight turned off the lights and ran out of the dorm. The room settled back into a comfortable darkness and silence.

Seconds later, the door was flung open and the lights flickered back on.

I can’t believe I am such an idiot!

Twilight dashed back into Sunset’s room, grabbed the jacket and put it on. She then turned the lights off again and walked out into the cold, now no longer shivering.

Much better!

***

Twilight trudged through the snow across the outdoor amphitheater. There was no one here now, but a few months ago, this was where the finals of the Battle of the Bands had been held. She looked up at the hill overlooking the field, and sure enough, there was a distant but unmistakable silhouette seated where the Rainbooms had played their last song against the sirens. Twilight ran to the base of the hill and called out to her.

“Sunset!”

The silhouette shifted and then unfolded, as if standing up.

“Twilight?”

Sunset Shimmer came running down the hill to her. Just as Twilight thought, she was wearing her older studded jacket. The sight of her reminded Twilight a little of the bully Sunset used to be when they had first met, and coupled with the memories of the night before, made Twilight's mood sour despite her elation at having found her.

“What are you doing h-”

Sunset noticed what Twilight was wearing. It was her newer jacket, with the orange stripes across the sleeves.

“Sorry. I forgot my winter clothes again, so I borrowed it,” Twilight said. She tried to sound friendly, but her tone ended up carrying a little of her lingering resentment.

“It’s… fine? How’d you know I was out here?”

“Well, when I saw this hanging on your closet, I figured you’d gone back to wearing your old one. And since you didn't bring your satchel or journal with you, you probably didn't leave the school grounds... that made me think of this place, where you threw your old jacket away and later changed your look.”

Twilight moved closer to Sunset, touching her sleeve.

“This jacket… it represents your past, doesn’t it?”

Sunset looked down and nodded.

“I was wearing it when… when I came through the portal long ago. When I was last out here, we were fighting the sirens - I decided to cast off who I once was and move on. That’s why I took it off and threw it aside. That new jacket - to me, it represents my independence and the new me. But after last night, I… I didn’t feel like I had the right to pretend I had moved on from the past or redeemed myself anymore. So… so I came out here, wearing this.”

She looked up again and into Twilight’s eyes.

“This is me, Twilight. I’m selfish. I make rash decisions, and I hurt other people to feel better about myself. I tried to change, but in the end I went back to being old me.”

Twilight sighed. Part of her wanted to comfort Sunset, but she still couldn't help but feel angry over what had happened.

“You're right. I trusted you, Sunset. I opened myself to you and gave you my virginity, but as you said, you used me to feel better about yourself."

Sunset's face filled with regret. She tried to speak up to apologize, but Twilight stopped her. "Wait. There is some stuff that I wanted to say to you, so please hear me out first."

Sunset nodded.

Twilight composed herself before she continued. She didn't want her words to contain any more anger than they had to. When she spoke her voice still carried pain and unhappiness, but the animosity was absent. "What you did - that really, really sucked. And I'm not familiar with love, and I admit don't know much about what sex means between people or ponies, but it made me feel really... cheap. I felt for a while that I'd lost a part of myself, that you'd ruined me, at least a little. I went home yesterday and cried for a bit, which made me feel better, but for the whole day I've just been... numb. I don't want to make you feel more guilty than I know you already are, but... I can't help it. I just had to let you know exactly how much you hurt me."

Sunset looked down. There were no tears, but she did look like she was about to cry.

Twilight ignored her expression. "And Sunset, there’s no ‘old you’ or ‘new you’. There’s just you - Sunset Shimmer. You don't get to pretend that both of them are different people. The person you are now is 'old you' with more lessons and experience. You've improved your strengths and diminished your flaws, but they're still a part of you."

Twilight took a deep breath and exhaled. Having let it all out, she felt much better. She could feel the emotional wounds beginning to heal already.

"But at the same time," she continued, her tone now measured and calm, "we all make mistakes. You haven’t failed just because you... had a misstep. You just have to learn from what you did and try your best not to do anything like it again. You betrayed my trust, so you have to work to earn it back again. That's one of the first things I learned about friendship. I mean, I’ve learned so much but I'm still making mistakes and learning new things every day."

"And that's why... you can still wear this jacket, Sunset. You're still the same girl you were before yesterday, the same girl you've always been. You've learned about friendship and bettered yourself a lot and yesterday you made a big mistake. That's all part of who you are." She took off the jacket and handed it to Sunset.

Sunset took off her studded jacket and gave it to Twilight. She took the other one and slowly put it on.

"Twilight... I'm so sorry."

Twilight put on the studded jacket and smiled slightly for the first time since they met that evening.

"I forgive you."

Sunset returned the smile. "You really are perfect, you know? I was right when I said you are so much better than me."

Twilight sighed and shook her head. “I'm definitely not perfect. You might not believe this, but just last night I slept with a girl even though she was really depressed and wasn’t thinking straight.”

Sunset looked appalled. “Don’t you dare blame yourself for yesterday! I knew what I was doing, Twilight! You were just-”

“-thinking about my crush when I should have been trying to be your friend? I’m not devoid of blame, Sunset. Will you forgive me too?”

“There's nothing to forgive! I mean, if there was, then yes, of course I would forgive you, but even if I was depressed, it was still, like, almost entirely my fault.”

“Oh yeah, it was mostly you.” said Twilight. She broke into a short giggle.

Sunset chuckled along, nodding in agreement.

As their laughter subsided, the quiet of the evening wrapped again around the pair. Twilight's smile slowly fell as she remembered the reason she came here.

“Sunset, I talked to Princess Celestia. She told me everything.”

Sunset Shimmer’s eyes went wide. The earlier levity vanished. She looked away.

“Then I guess… I guess I’ve got no more secrets left.”

Twilight pulled the older girl into a close hug. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, into her ear.

Sunset didn’t turn as her arms wrapped around Twilight. “What for?”

“For everything that happened to you. I had a family of my own: parents, a brother, even Spike when we adopted him later on. Your mother was all you had and I took her from you.”

“It’s not your fault, Twilight. How could you have known?”

Twilight pulled back a little so that she could look Sunset in the eye, but still kept her arms holding the other girl.

“I can’t imagine how it must have been for you to have been through all that..."

Sunset cast her eyes downward. She leaned forward so that their heads touched, but stayed quiet for a while.

Presently she spoke. “Twilight, did you ever wonder why you never met this world’s version of me?”

“…No.” Twilight shook her head slightly, which made their foreheads rub together. The thought had honestly never occurred to her.

“I once asked Vice-Principal Luna if Principal Celestia ever had any children. I mean, it seemed really strange at the time that my counterpart didn’t seem to exist, but then I found out that Principal Celestia became pregnant right before her husband divorced her. Her daughter, the human-me… she was a stillbirth.”

Twilight’s eyes opened in shock.

“I was never meant to be born, Twilight. If Mother wasn’t an alicorn, if she didn’t have magic, I wouldn’t have made it either. I’m a… a freak of fate.”

Sunset pulled Twilight closer into another hug. Twilight heard her sniffle slightly before Sunset pulled apart again.

“Sometimes I wonder if things would have been better if I was never born either. I'm still not sure if Mom really wanted have me. Heck, I wasn't even allowed to call her 'Mom' except when we were in total privacy. Even in my journal I had to call her 'Princess Celestia' just in case anyone ever found it."

"It must have been terrible for you," said Twilight.

"I got used to it. And I don't blame her for that, at least. Lots of nobles have illegitimate foals, and you know how ruthless those hyenas in high society can be when they disapprove of what you do. So most of them just quietly drop their babies off at orphanages, or send them to servant's houses to be raised. Despite everything that happened later, I'm grateful she tried to bring me up herself."

"No wait. Hang on, Sunset. You... you shouldn't give your mother credit just because she did what she was supposed to do."

Sunset thought about it. "That's true, I guess. But I'm just saying it could have been a lot worse for me. I still had a very happy foalhood. I still treasure all the memories of that time."

An image of herself as a foal swum into her mind. She remembered having uncontrolled magical spurts at a young age, and Celestia had taught her how to control her awakening power, channeling it into levitating objects for the first time. She had been so happy when she managed to pick up a coin with her cyan aura, and her mother had looked so proud. That was long before she got her cutie-mark and everything went wrong.

"I have something I need to confess to you, Twilight. I... I knew about you when we were just fillies. It was after I got my cutie-mark but before you'd gotten yours."

Twilight nodded. "Princess Celestia told me."

"I... see. Well I was... I was always really jealous of you. Even back then. Do you know what happened the first time I tried to make friends on my own? I was already friendly with Princess Cadance, so I decided to give Mom’s advice a shot and started talking to other fillies at the school. Then one day soon after that I saw Cadance babysitting you and I… I just lost it. I was so jealous that I blew off all the friends I made and swore off friendship forever just because I thought you were taking Cadance away from me too. I mean you were younger than me, didn’t have your cutie-mark yet, and didn’t even know I existed, but I envied everything you had. How pathetic is that?”

Twilight broke the hug and put her hand on Sunset’s shoulder, making sure that Sunset was looking right at her. She ignored the tears forming in Sunset’s eyes.

“Sunset, putting your mother aside for a moment, there’s something I need to tell you. Despite everything you’ve said, all the mistakes you’ve made… I want you to know that I actually really admire you.”

“Wha…what? How can… how can you admire anything about me?”

“Sometimes I feel like... I feel like I lead a charmed life. There's so much I have, that I sometimes take for granted, without having to really earn them. My family, my friends, even my destiny... sometimes I feel like they all just fell into my hooves. And I know you say all that made you jealous, but when I see how much you had to struggle to get everything you have, all the trials you had to go through... I think that if it was me who grew up with only a mother who couldn't acknowledge me, who had to start all over in an alien world with nothing, and worst of all lost all my friends over and over again... I don't think I could have done as well as you did. I think I would have broken and given up ages ago. You... you are really strong, Sunset. When I saw how people were still treating you during the Battle of the Bands, and heard about what happened last year, I realized you are tougher than almost anyone I've ever met.

"And when you think about it, when we were younger we weren't really that different. I used to depend so much on Princess Celestia, even though she’s part of the reason I’m so... obsessive." Twilight took a deep breath and continued, "After we saved Princess Luna, I think Princess Celestia didn't need me anymore either. I mean, I know she was really happy to have her sister back, and I think she eventually understood that I couldn't actually be the daughter she lost, but she stopped paying as much attention to me too. I didn't handle it very well. But you broke free from her while you were still a filly and walked off to make your own way through life.”

That didn’t seem to cheer Sunset up. “My mom threw me out of the house, Twilight. I only ran away because I didn’t have a choice. I’m not sure I even really ‘broke free’ from her. Look what I did when I stole your crown! I did all that just to spite her. I was just acting out like a spoiled foal.”

“Yes… but it’s not like I never acted out either. I freaked out whenever I thought I would lose her approval. You wouldn’t believe the trouble I caused.”

“I can’t imagine it was anything like what I did,” Sunset said, flatly.

Twilight rolled her eyes. “I once tried to create a friendship problem just so that I could solve it in time to make my weekly report. It got so bad I cast a Want-it, Need-it spell on the whole of Ponyville and caused a riot.”

“Wow.”

“And in the end, Princess Celestia had to come solve my problem for me. That’s how dependent I was on her. I think, compared to how much your mother neglected you before you finally went crazy, my response was a lot less... proportionate.”

Sunset Shimmer wiped her tears away and smiled. “I guess we both needed to learn how not to let her define who we are.”

Twilight smiled back. “She really does have that effect on ponies, doesn’t she? Today I had to learn that my mentor isn’t nearly as perfect as I once thought she was. I can't believe how much I looked up to her. I still can't believe she'd try to replace you after you left.”

Sunset sighed resignedly. “I don't know how much I can blame her for that sometimes. She’s used to moving on when her loved ones come and go. We... had this talk once, when she was telling me one of the stories about my father. I mean, Mom has been around for Ages, in the historical sense of the term. My dad wasn’t the first stallion she loved, and I wasn’t her first foal, either. She outlasted them all, Twilight. She's had to bury so many friends and loved ones that I think she purposely tries to avoid falling in love just because of it. And every time one passed she always mourned them and then threw herself into her work, dedicated herself anew to Equestria. As time went on she began to recover faster and faster from her grief, because it's... almost a routine by now. That's just her way of dealing with the loss. I don’t think she could handle immortality if she didn’t.”

Twilight looked into the sky at the moon above them. "I wonder if that's why she was so obsessed with saving Princess Luna. They're the only two alicorns who are truly immortal. She's the only constant Celestia must have had..."

"I guess that makes sense. Compared to her ageless sister, the one lifetime she can spend with her daughter probably doesn't mean much."

“I don't know if that's really true, but she told me... she told me she still loves you and that she's sorry for what she did to you. I know she's hurt you and she honestly wasn't a very good mother, but I believe she really misses you and... really wants to make it up to you. She poured out all her pain to me today, all her regrets... and I think she's been blaming herself for everything you've suffered. Even when you were at your worst, she still thinks it was all her fault."

Sunset sighed. "You know, there was a time when I would have been happy to hear how much pain I caused her, but now I... I just feel kind of sad. Is it weird that I'm feeling pity for her?"

"Sunset, I think no matter what happened, she's still your mother and you still love her. When I told her about... us, she advised me to forgive you even if it didn't work out. And that even if I couldn't forgive you right away I should still try to eventually, because it would be a shame to ruin what we used to have over this. I know it isn't quite the same between you and her, but I think the advice is still appropriate... even if you only forgive her so that you can move beyond your past for good."

Sunset was quiet for a while. "...I'll try. Sometimes just thinking about her makes me irrationally angry and depressed."

Twilight smiled. "You don't have to talk to her until you're ready. You don't even have to talk to her anytime soon."

"We'll see, I guess." Suddenly Sunset stiffened as a realization hit her. "Wait, you told Mom we had sex?"

"Yeah, I know." Twilight blushed. "I didn't know she was your mother at the time."

Sunset covered her face with her hands, groaning in embarrassment. "Now I'm really dreading seeing her again."

"Well, that's what happens when you make me upset enough to have to ask her for advice," grinned Twilight.

Sunset snickered at the joke. Then she looked at Twilight, smiling just a little nervously. “Speaking of us… what are we, exactly? I mean… you know what I mean.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Shouldn’t I be asking you that question? Have you figured out how you feel about me yet? Or do you still need more time?”

Sunset’s smile broadened slightly. “After tonight... I’m absolutely sure I like you. A lot. And I know for a fact that I don’t hate you, not anymore.” Her expression became a bit more serious. “But... I'm not sure I've really gotten over all our history. I mean, I'm crazy for you, but not all of it is in an entirely healthy way. And getting into bed together so quickly was a really bad idea, which I'm still really sorry about, by the way. So what I think is... we should like, spend more time together first, and go on some dates. That way I can also rebuild your trust in me.”

Twilight beamed. “I'd like that. I have a good feeling about us. At least we know now we can be honest with each other.”

Suddenly an idea struck Sunset. “Hey, wanna see something cool?”

“Oooookay?”

Sunset took Twilight by the hand and led her up to the top of the hill. As they passed the crest, the town’s main square came into view. The buildings were covered with rows and rows of bright lights, illuminating the area in a warm festive glow. Along the edges were little display houses that looked like they were made of gingerbread, and there seemed to be a lot of giant candy canes planted into the ground. In the middle of the square was an enormous tree decorated in glowing ornaments that twinkled with reflections of the lights. Surrounding it were a large number of people walking through the square enjoying the holiday.

“Gosh.”

“Neat, huh? It’s a bit like Hearth’s Warming back home, but with more lights. Oh, and they always decorate a big fir tree with bells and stuff.”

“Why?”

Sunset thought for a minute. “Hmm… I don’t know, actually. There doesn’t seem to be any reason other than tradition.”

Twilight giggled. “It’s beautiful.”

Twilight put one arm around Sunset’s waist and leaned against her shoulder. She turned her head, gazing into her eyes, and then pecked her lightly on the lips.

“Happy Hearth’s Warming, Sunset Shimmer,” she said.

“Happy Hearth’s Warming, Twilight Sparkle.”

Author's Note

A lot of what is referenced in the previous few chapters is in IDW's The Fall of Sunset Shimmer. It's actually a really interesting read despite how many continuity issues it creates. Specific to this chapter, there is one frame where Sunset is talking to Lyra, Minuette, Twinkleshine, pre-Amending Fences Moondancer and Lemon Hearts (They're not just there as random background ponies, either. The writer clearly picked them on purpose because they're the same friends that Twilight has in Friendship is Magic, Part 1 and later, in Amending Fences) all while Cadance, Shining Armor and Twilight are in the background having a picnic. That frame incidentally gave me the most headaches of any part of the EQG universe because it implied that all six mares were adults while Twilight was still a blank-flank filly. Which makes no sense. It also implied that Cadance was living in the palace while Sunset Shimmer was Celestia's student, so why didn't Cadance know about her?

The best I could do to make it work for this fic was to assume that it's just how the artist drew slightly older fillies, and that Twilight was a late bloomer. Because the idea that time-dilation was involved (for Sunset) and that somehow Twilight's friends stopped aging just breaks Occam's Razor into bits.

Anyway whenever I read that page the thing that comes to mind is that Sunset saw Twilight with Cadance and thought, "FRIENDSHIP IS A LIE!!!!"