Dead on Arrival

        "Hey, Doc!" Ditzy barged through the Doctor's doors, followed by Twilight and her friends in a sprint.

        "Hmm? Ah, Ditzy! So good to see you again!" The Doctor's head poked out from the TARDIS to meet his guests. His house was packed with complex machinery, vacuum tubes, and strange devices which do who knows what. Ditzy would always get lost.

        "Doc, we really need your help!" Ditzy exclaimed.

        "What is it, miss Doo?" the Doctor asked with a pang of concern, leaving the deep blue box and shutting it behind him as he rushed out to meet her.

        "Oh it's just awful, Doc! Fluttershy's trapped in another dimension!" Ditzy explained.

        "The kind one? Great wickering stallions, that's terrible! How on earth did she get there?"

        Twilight took over the rundown while the rest of her friends made their way into the lab. "My friends and I were trying to find some friendship problems to solve, so we opened up a portal to another dimension and Fluttershy's rabbit jumped in, so she jumped in after it and the portal crumpled shut after her. We can't open it again without her, so we were going to go to the Canterlot Library to find a solution, but Ditzy thought you could help. Would you happen to know any other way to bring her back?" Twilight explained hastily and out of breath.

        "Hmm, it definitely seems like something she would do, that is if I knew her, of course." The Doctor responded, raising his hoof to his chin, stroking it inquisitively. "Oh, yes! I'm actually getting close to discovering a way to enable interdimensional travel on command, I was actually working on it just now," He digressed. "Wait, if you somehow managed to open an interdimensional portal, then that means ... you mean to say there's a spell for it? Again?!" He shouted in frustration. "Blast!" He cried in fury, kicking his hoof. "Well, it was bound to happen again sometime. Why actually learn about the laws of nature when magic can do all the work for you!" He heatedly sidetracked. Twilight was offended. What he said about her life's work stoked a fire in her belly, but she ignored it. He sighed once more, finished his rant, and asked, "Well, may I see it anyway? It could help me fix up a way to get your friend Buttershy back," his hoof extended towards Twilight.

        Twilight pushed back her negative first impression of The Doctor. Saving Fluttershy came first. After all she's the princess of friendship, she knows you can't judge a book by its cover. The first impression Fluttershy made and how awkward and pushy she was rose to her conscious mind, the nostalgic memory tainted by the dire predicament made her eyes water and grew a stone in her throat. "It's Fluttershy, and thank you for taking the time to help us." Twilight corrected in a slightly creaky voice. She levitated Starswirl's scroll out of her saddlebag and to the Doctor's outstretched hoof. It's ok. We'll get her back in one piece she comforted herself, taking deep breaths. The strategy Cadence showed her really helped calm her tears.

        He unfurled the scroll and scanned for information: things like instructions, coordinates, warnings, et cetera. "Hmm, yes," he mumbled. "Ditzy, could you pass me some stationery?" He asked his closest friend, and also his only friend.

        Ditzy looked confused and cocked her head. "Statio- what?"

        Twilight levitated a quill and slip of paper from her saddlebags and to The Doctor. "Oh, that's alright! I never leave home without some!" She made an effort to be friendly anyway, she sensed he didn't see many ponies.

        "Oh, thank you, Twilight!" He said with gratitude. He turned to the group and pointed at the symbols Twilight found before. "These numbers down here are coordinates, see? They're almost same ones I use for the TARDIS."

        "You could've just said 'pen and paper'," Ditzy mumbled, staring at the ground mildly peeved, but it passed quickly.

        "Excuse me, sir. I know you're very rushed, but might we at least have a name?" Rarity inquired.

        "Oh, I'm the Doctor," he answered, scrawling down the coordinates on a sheet of paper and straightening his green bow tie, looking rather smug.

        "Doctor who?" she replied.

        Ditzy budded in, "Oh, he's just being mysterious. His name's Time Turner, but just call him Doctor. He likes it," Ditzy added.

        "Ditzy!" Doctor said with an annoyed inflection, shifting his eyes from the scroll and to his companion. It seemed rude, but still managed to be playful. He did another read through of the spell to ensure he didn't miss anything.

        "So's there a way to bring her back or what?" Rainbow asked The Doctor rather brashly, hovering in the air and being very careful not to tangle herself in The Doctor's various dangling contraptions.

        "Please hold your enthusiasm, miss Dash, and get down from there! Those are priceless artifacts from my travels!" Rainbow did as he asked. Not just to be polite, but because this stallion may be the only ticket to getting Fluttershy back in one piece. She was never one to let a friend of her's down, especially In what might be their darkest hour. Offending what may be their only hope didn't seem like a good idea. The Doctor continued, "I'm working on it, but unfortunately the TARDIS I input these coordinates to can only travel through time and space, not dimensions."

        "Wait, time and space?!" Twilight asked excitedly, her face lighting up. Such a feat was accomplishable with a skilled enough unicorn such as herself with the right spell, but to see an earth pony accomplish it was unheard of to her, and all without magic, no less! She noted to ask him about the way this 'TARDIS' worked.

        "Oh, don't be so surprised. You've done it before yourself, remember? I took it to another dimension once but that was just a whole kerfuffle I did under extreme circumstances and one that I wish to never repeat as long as I live. That's why I was making modifications to do it again, but easier this time around," the Doctor elaborated.

        "This is quite a collection, Doctor. Where did you get all this stuff?" Starlight inquired while experimenting with a plasma ball.

        "Er, what? Oh, made it myself mostly. A few souvenirs, too. Sorry, but the inquiries of guests are not my greatest concern right now," The Doctor answered as quick as he could. Finishing up his 3rd read through, he felt confident that he got all the information he needed. There wasn't much, though. Just a bunch of magical jargon. He understood it, but magic and science don't really mix, and since magic failed to help it wasn't much progress to their predicament.

        "So what's next, Doc?" Applejack asked, observing the strange blue box he was working on, among other contraptions. The Doctor rolled up the scroll and tossed it to Twilight, bouncing off her horn and catching her off-guard, startling her. "Oh, and what is that thing yer workin' on, anyhow?" Applejack inquired.

        "What? You've never seen a police box before?" The Doctor answered with a sly smile. "And to answer your first question, well, I'd have to finish the Temporal Shift modifications to the TARDIS, which could take a while."

        "How long are we talking about, Doctor?" Twilight asked as she levitated the scroll back in her saddlebags.

        "Check back in 12 hours, and use that time to get some rest. You all look quite exhausted," the Doctor prescribed. He trotted over to the TARDIS to continue his work. The Doctor walked in, followed by an uninvited Pinkie trailing his flank. The rest of the 7 got ready for a day trip to the Canterlot library by the door, finishing up their various curiosities.

        "Boy, it sure is spacey in here!" Pinkie added as she trotted into the TARDIS, Pinkie commented, gawking at the ceiling.

        "Yes, that's almost what they all sa- wait, why are you in here?" The Doctor said, ushering Pinkie out. "Please, miss Pie. I need solitary space to work properly!" Pinkie smiled at the Doctor anyway as she was led out of the TARDIS.

        "Oh, sorry! It's just such a great place for a party, though! Fluttershy's 'Welcome Back' party! Ooh! Or maybe an 'It's okay, we come in peace!' party for the aliens we meet when we rescue Fluttershy," Pinkie continued.

        "Yes, that's very nice, Pinkie. Now let me work! Check back with me in a few, well, 12 hours, and I'll have the Temporal Shifter online by then. Go have fun in Canterlot with your friends 'till then!"

        Twilight and the rest of the gang were just about ready to leave to catch the next train. "Oh, good, Pinkie's back. We were just about to leave, you ready?" Twilight asked Pinkie.

"Ready when you are!" She responded.

"Oh, and Doc, thanks again for helping us," Twilight thanked with gratitude as she and the gang trotted out the door and to the train station.

        The Doctor peeked his head out of the TARDIS again. "Oh, you're very welcome, Princess Sparkle! Oh where did I put that ... Ditzy? Could you fetch me something from the tool shed? Ditzy?" There wasn't a trace of her anywhere.

        "Uh, doc? Where's your bathroom again?" Ditzy called back sheepishly from the labyrinth of contraptions.

----------

Fluttershy was stuck in her natural resting position on her back. You know the one. Forelegs flopped, hind legs spread, oddly sexual despite the lack of lady-parts, et cetera. She was clean as a whistle and stiff as a board on my bathroom mat. It's time to fix this for good.

"I thought you'd be more timid, Fluttershy," I morbidly kidded to her pornographic corpse with a cheesy grin. The plan was all laid out.

First I'm going to cross her forelegs over her chest, like you usually see in funerals and stuff. Then I'll shut her legs and extend them so it looks like she's lying on her back, assuming she isn't rock-hard by then.

The lactic acid building in Fluttershy's muscles will soon make modelling my life-sized Fluttershy impossible, at least until it passes. Rigor mortis only lasts a few days.

I grabbed her left foreleg and tried to pull it up to the sky. It was rigid and tough, very tough, but still malleable. I had to push with gusto to get it to move, but it did eventually. I shifted the appendage over her heart, or where I'd believe her heart to be. The other leg was the same toughness, much like partially dried Plasticine. I crossed it with the other leg, her hooves atop her breast. Now time for the hind legs. I have to close her legs together before I can extend them.

Surprisingly they were much stiffer than the forelegs. I would've assumed the opposite, since there's more muscle to stiffen up. But that doesn't matter now. Again I started with the right leg. It was incredibly difficult to press them together. In the struggle, and to help make a stable corpse to push on, I pushed Fluttercorpse against the wall. As I struggled to get her legs in place, I knelt on the ground and pushed my shoulder to the side of her leg to push them together. A few cracking noises could be heard coming from her left wing as I pressed my weight on her body against the wall. "Damn, well there goes one," I said matter-of-factly. We still have the other. Chances are they're symmetrical.

Her legs were in place, but bent in such a way as to look as if she were partially tucking her legs in, or maybe rearing up a buck while lying on her back. I needed extend her legs to the sky before I straighten them down. I took hold of the bottom side of the gaskin and the top half of the shin and tried with all my might to bend her stiff haunches, leaning into it for extra power. As I was mustering every ounce of strength to make Fluttershy finally look peaceful. As her leg almost completely extended, a thought crossed my mind. If Fluttershy's a pegasus, she has to be pretty light to fly, especially with such proportionately tiny wings. Birds have evolved a way to get around this. I wonder if she has-

SNAP!

Hollow bones.

I looked at the site of the snap. The shin broke near the joint connecting both halves of the leg. It shredded its way through the top muscle and jutted out through the leg, right in between my hand and the joint that connects both halves of the appendage. Chunky maroon blood was oozing out of the wound, dripping and plopping out of the protruding area around the bone, squeezed out by my applied pressure, and tumbled down on my other arm in thick streams.

"Ah, shit," I sighed to myself in frustration. I dismissed it for now. I'll fix it when she's done, it's almost fully extended anyway. Her leg was almost totally extended in the air, time bring it back down to earth. I put my right hand over her broken bone and my left over her gaskin and pushed down, putting my upper body over her and straightening my arms, like I was a bear trying to bust into a garbage can. Slowly and surely, it eased down to the ceramic tile. Now for the other one.

Using the same technique as last time, I extended her leg in the air, being careful not to snap another bone. I used a method similar to threshold braking. Using just enough pressure to shift the stiff muscle, but not quite enough to snap another brittle, hollow bone. It worked this time, so I was able to fully extend it like I planned.

I finished pushing down her left leg, stood up, and looked down at my work in its entirety. It looked ... off.

It wouldn't be so much for a human, but she isn't a human. I critiqued hind legs: they were bent unnaturally. Her legs weren't meant to extend or bend that far for any extended period of time, except that one time in "Hurricane Fluttershy" when she was crying under a tree talking with her animal friends after she was laughed at in the track. Even then her legs were pretty extended, but not fully like I did here. One of them was noticeably higher than the other, and her leg was still horribly broken, brown bone sticking out and chunky blood stagnating around it. The only thing that didn't look fully unnatural were her forelegs crossing her heart. It didn't look too uncomfortable, but you could tell they weren't designed to bend that way. The effort I exerted to make her look at peace only served to make her look more grotesque. At least she wasn't flashing her crotch at everyone who walked by anymore.

I snapped my gaze at her face. It didn't look restful in the slightest. She just looked dead. Tangled hair, gaping mouth, tongue flopping down her throat, obstructing her windpipe; and that damn wink staring into the soul of everyone unfortunate to make eye contact.

"Well that was a waste of time. What now?"

Well, I have to find a place to put her until the party at 6. What about the fridge? No, she wouldn't fit in there. Even if I took everything out she still wouldn't be able to squeeze in such a tiny box.

Well, what about a place to hide her?

Not many people to hide from. I don't live with anyone, and my neighbors aren't terribly nosy. I could put her on a table, or even back in the tub. I could fill it with cold water and cool her off that way! Perfect!

I bent down, worked my arms under her, and raised her up. Eyup. Stiff as a board. No changing anything now. I carefully lowered her back down into the bathtub, let her go, and drew the cold water. The fluid splashed on her dull-yellow hind hooves. Her extended legs prop her head and shoulders out the tub and up the wall, so they'd rot while the rest of her stays fresh. I'm not keen on damaging this national treasure and famous celebrity any more than I already have, so literally breaking her in is out. I guess she'll just have to manage. I looked back at the drain and sure enough her tail was already between her legs and back down the drain, plugging it up again.

I pulled it back out again, surprisingly not filthy this time thank god, to put the proper plug in. I planned the day while the makeshift corpse locker was filling.

So how am I going to get her to the morgue? I don't have a car.

Well, I could ride my bike back to school for the party and while I'm there I could see if anyone would like to 'see something they wouldn't believe' and drive us all to my house. We'd stuff her in the trunk and hop off to the hospital. The party's over at 10, right? So we'd get here at about 10:20, and if they're the most unexcitable pricks in the world, get her trucked off to the hospital before 11. The biggest problem would be the time we'd get there. I doubt that would be a problem. Most'd just spend an hour just getting their jaws off the ground. When everyone has had their time with her and we finish our after-party, We'll drive her to the hospital at a solid 1 AM. Should be pretty dead then. We could run into a few doctors, but they shouldn't bother us.

The tub was almost full now, so I shut it off. To be honest it looks like someone snuck in and killed her while she was having a bath. The bloody leg wound tainted the water red, and her gaping maw, tangled hair, and winking dead eye completed the look. But there's not much I can do about that.

I looked at Fluttershy one last time before I left her for the rest of the day.

Now to clean up the mess.