Methodology I: Appeal to Pride

That evening, Haystacks trotted back to Sweet Apple Acres. He preferred flying, but his legs could probably use the exercise. That, and he did not want to risk seeing Rainbow Dash in the air. He was not sure if she would connect the dots and turn him away before the party, but he would rather not risk it.

It was now the hour during which Celestia slowly lowered the sun. Most of the day it was static, but now it slowly moved across the sky. Soon the sun would be blinding anyone who was facing that direction. As long as everyone at the party faced the other way, though, it would provide atmospheric lighting.

He saw as he approached that the "Just" had been crossed out on the banner. Near the gate, a pink pony was greeting a guest. When she saw Haystacks, she waved enthusiastically.

"Over here!" she called out.

To ward off any unwanted physical contact, Haystacks stuck out his hoof to bump as he approached. Thankfully, Pinkie Pie accepted this.

"Hey everypony!" she exlaimed at the rest of the gathering, "The guest of honor is here!". Haystacks noted that there were less than twenty adult ponies present, plus maybe ten fillies and colts. He suddenly found himself the center of attention of most of the group. He quickly headed off anxiety by thinking of it as a lecture.

"Hello," he said with a wave of both hoof and wing, "I hope everyone's having fun."

"Oh, everyone always has fun at a Pinkie Pie Party!" Pinkie Pie said without much modesty. Several of the other ponies nodded in agreement, though, so it was probably true.

"NOW can we have cake?" one of the colts asked. Pinkie Pie nodded with a grin.

As he walked towards the cake table himself, Haystacks noticed that four telescopes were set up on a little platform a short distance away. Pinkie was doing what looked remarkably like a foals 'potty dance' while waiting for her turn at cake a few places ahead of him in line, so he decided it was best to wait to ask.

"Hello," said a voice behind him. He turned his head and saw a pink unicorn mare, of a darker hue than Pinkie Pie, with a purple mane and tail. "I'm Amethyst Star, I help out at the library."

"Oh, hello. Haystacks," he said, turning about long enough to extend a hoof. After a bump, he turned back around. Talking to someone behind you in line was a skill one never really lost from foalhood.

"What are you a doctor of?" Amethyst Star asked as the line edged forward. "I saw you had been by the library. Do you study aeronautics or maybe biology?"

"Errr, no, I actually specialize in..."

"Astronomy!" Pinkie interrupted in a loud voice as she cut herself a slice of cake about twice as large as the ones that had already been cut and set on plates. Apparently she had good hearing. He stared in her direction for a moment.

"Yes, actually," he said as she trotted over, her mouth full of cake, "But how did you know?"

"We-elll," Pinkie Pie began after swallowing a mouthful of cake, "When I first met you I noticed a telescope sticking out of your bag, and I thought "Why would a pony be carrying around a telescope?" and then I remembered what Maude, that's my sister, told me at one point about the strata under the observatory at Manehattan and I thought 'maybe he works at someplace like that!' but you were here to study the Sonic Rainboom so I wasn't sure but then you just said aero-whatsit wasn't your field so I figured that meant astronomy!" She somehow said everything after the first word all in one breath. That mare could be a good sea diver if she wanted to be.

"Well, Pinkie, I'll admit to being impressed with your deduction. It must run in the family," Haystacks said.

"Huh?" Pinkie said, cocking her head to one side, "Have you met my family?"

"Just the one other member," Haystacks said, "After we talk last I racked my brain trying to remember why the name Maude sounded familiar. I finally did: we took the same creative writing class at one point."

"Really!?" Pinkie exclaimed, "Isn't her poetry just the best?"

"It's interesting, I'll grant you," Haystacks said, grabbing a plate of cake and shifting to the side, "But that's not what I meant. When we had some group exercises, I recall her asking what the dirt on some character's hooves looked like. To show that it was important, she proceeded to deduce where several of us had been based on the dirt on our hooves."

"Yeah, I know, she does that," Pinkie said with a grin, "She's like the best big sister ever!"

"I'll take your word on that," Haystacks said. He took a bite of cake before asking his next question. "So you guessed astronomer and put together a stargazing party based on that, I take it. What if you had been wrong?"

"Then I would have brought out something else," Pinkie said, "I have tons of party games stashed all over Ponyville for just such emergencies! But I just had a feeling I was right."

Haystacks looked around. "Where's Ms. Rainbow Dash?"

"Oh, she's always fashionably late. Actually, that's a better description of Rarity."

Haystacks did not know who she was talking about, but the question was soon answered.

"Oh, there she is. Hey Rarity!" Pinkie Pie said, jumping up and waving.

The pony in question was a white unicorn wearing a rather large white hat, decorated with what appeared to be parsley, or at least something made to look like parsley. It worked surprisingly well.

"Hey everypony! Did I miss anything?" said a voice from above. A blue pegasus flew down and landed with a dramatic flourish.

"Rainbow Dash! You missed the first serving of cake!" Pinkie Pie said. She was, in fact, going back for seconds. Several of the ponies in attendance chuckled.

"I think that's my cue," Haystacks said, carefully maneuvering over without letting go of his plate.

"Oh, hey, you must be the egghead this is all for," Rainbow Dash said, looking him over.

"Yes. Have you heard why I'm here?" he said.

Rainbow Dash shrugged. "Something about vacation? Pinkie was a little vague, but she insisted I come."

Haystacks took a bite of cake to steady his nerves.

"Well, it's about the Sonic Rainboom..."

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "This again? You're wasting your time. Like I told the last like, three eggheads, I'm not gonna keep doing the same thing over and over just so they can see nothing happen."

Haystacks smirked here. Perfect. "Well, what if it's not the same thing? What if I understand things just a bit better?"

Rainbow Dash cocked her head. "What, because your a Pegasus? Sorry to break it to you, but so were a few of them."

Haystacks shook his head. "Oh no, not at all. I mean I understand racing."

Rainbow Dash chortled at this. "Pssh, you? What does an egghead know about racing?"

"Well, Fast Clip has an advanced degree," Haystacks said, trying to sound casual about the name-drop.

Rainbow Dash's demeanor changed almost instantly. "The Wonderbolt's trainer?" she said, putting her front hooved to her face with a big smile, effectively fangirling, "You know him?"

Haystacks could not hide a smile, but he tried not to make it too obvious. "Well, we've only met once or twice," he said, "But I do know how to get ahold of him. If you'd help my research, maybe I could get him or some of the Wonderbolts to sign something."

"Omigosh really?" Rainbow Dash said, doing an impromptou aerial loop, "That would be great!" Haystacks noted they were definitely the center of attention right now. He did not know this, but Pinkie Pie was taking the opportunity to eat far more than her share of cake.

Rainbow Dash stopped and once agan her expression changed quickly. Now she looked suspicious. "Well, it's a tempting offer, but that doesn't prove you're any better than the other eggheads."

"I don't know about better," Haystacks said with a shrug. It would have been easier had she taken that bait, but then, it would not have been as much fun. "Just better suited to this. So how abooout this..."

He started pacing a bit and took it slow, almost as if he were making it up on the spot. He had some awareness that it likely was not a completely convincing act, but at the very least it gave him a chance to organize his thoughts.

"Let's have a race," he said, smirking just a bit.

"Pssh, me and you?" Rainbow Dash said, "Ha! I can beat you any time, anywhere."

*Yes!* Haystacks thought to himself. Now to real her in. He could not help smiling again.

"Alright, later this week. Two days from now if I can get some help setting it up," he said. He looked around the crowd. Two or three ponies nodded when he stopped and stared at them, though a bit confusedly.

"So, two days from now at two hours before sundown. I'll have a track built. I assume there's an open field somewhere around here we could use?" Haystacks asked.

"Huh? Field?" Rainbow Dash said, "We're talking about a flying race, right?"

"Yes, it would not really be relevant otherwise," Haystacks said, "But there's a lot of non-Pegasi around here. So, a field?"

"Yeah, I think we got one that's fallow over on the north 40," Applejack said, coming up beside him. "I hope you know what you're doin'" she whispered to him. Haystacks did not respond as he thought it would be too conspicuous.

"Excellent. If I win, you help me with my research. If I lose, I'll do all I can to get whatever you want autographed. Deal?" Haystacks said to Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow Dash crossed her front hooves over her chest as she floated in the air. "Alright, but I really don't see what the point is. What kind of race are we talking?"

"Well, that's the trick, see. You won't find out until you get there," Haystacks said. He very nearly held his breath. Here was yet another point where something could go wrong.

"Mmm," Rainbow Dash pondered, staring up at nothing in particular, "Think you can get an edge that way? Alright, but nothing too tricky, right? Just a straightforward race?"

"Yes, it will be one of the accepted types," Haystacks said with a nod, "Perfect."

"So!" he said, turning a bit and hoping he could break the weird tension he had created. "What do we have planned for this party?"

Pinkie Pie looked up from the cake. She had by this point abandoned all subtlety and had just been eating it directly from the table.

"Om, migh!" she mumbled through a mouthful of cake. She swallowed before continuing. "Well that's the best part! As soon as Princess Celestia finishes lowering the sun, we'll go stargazing! You know how to point the telescopes, right?"

Haystacks was not sure if he should be offended, but he decided to err on the side of caution and did not take offense. "I do, yes."

He made sure to set up a view of Saturn and its ring as well as the moons of Jupiter and the Moon for the young ones. They had to leave not too long after dark, and a few of the adults left with them. The rest soon became more interested in overly loud music and something approximating dancing than the telescopes, by and large. That was not really his thing, so he took to giving mini lectures, and pressing for help on his project the next day, whenever someone came to look through the telescopes. That probably annoyed them, he realized as time went on, but he was not sure what else to do. Besides, it was good practice if he was going to teach.

His personal observations on Pinkie Pie's parties: she had some flexibility in fitting the guest of honor's interests, but was set in her ways on a few points. Whether she thought the typical party music and pseudo-dancing combination would go well with star gazing or just did not think about it, he did not know. He really hope she worked on that. Different ponies like different things, and what some ponies think of as a 'party' is mild torture for others. Case in point, the music was hurting his admittedly-sensitive ears, and was making it hard to explain to the occasional party-goer that did drift over what they were looking at. Eventually, he took to making ancilliary observations for his own work and making notes in his notebook. Without photographic plates, it was not exactly hard data in the modern sense, but it was something to do.

"Hey, thanks for putting this together," Haystacks said a bit later. By this point Applejack had retired (farm work started early, he knew), and the music had been turned down a bit so as not to disturb the Apples. Why that had not applied to Apple Bloom, he was not sure.

"You're welcome!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed, a bit too loudly. She had apparently not adjusted to the new volume. Or something... as he thought about it he realized that did not make much sense.

"Er, yes, well, I usually am up most of the night, but I'm having to adjust my schedule for this trip, so I really should be going," Haystacks said.

"Awww," Pinkie said in a more normal volume, looking disappointed, "Well, remember to take the last of the cake!"

He was surprised to see that a slice of cake was, in fact, sitting untouched.

"What did you, set that aside just for this?" he asked.

"Of course!" Pinkie said, "The guest of honor always gets the last slice of cake!"

He had always heard that as the FIRST slice, but he was not going to argue. He made a few goodbyes to some of the ten or so ponies still hanging around. There was one in particular he felt like egging on a bit.

"Hey, Dash," he said to the blue pegasus, though she had not said he could call her that, "Remember, day after tomorrow, two hours before sundown. Better make sure you're ready."

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and crossed her forehooves. "Whatever, just make sure you do your part when you lose."

He gave what he hoped was a cocky grin and touched his forehoof to a strand of his mane, as was his habit, then took to the sky.