My Little Insert: Bronies are Equestrian (VERY Cancelled)

Carousel Boutique, 9:00 P.M.

Matt’s POV

“And here we are, darling!” Rarity said in a sing-song voice. “Your room will be upstairs, second door on the right.”

“Alright. Thank you again Rarity!” I said, trotting up the stairs. I opened the door to my room and took in my surroundings. There was a Queen-sized (how fitting) bed against the right wall, with icy blue sheets. There were matching drapes on the wall opposite of the door, and a small dresser/vanity opposite the bed. Between the bed and windows there was a small door, which simply led to a small walk-in closet.

“Keynote, my dear, could I see you downstairs for a moment?” Rarity called up the stairs.

“Sure thing Rarity!” I answered. “Be right down!”

I wonder what she could want.

Sweet Apple Acres, 9:30 P.M.

Amanda’s POV

Luna’s night sky was glittering with stars by the time we arrived back at the farm. As we approached the farmhouse, a couple of lights flickered on. After a couple moments, a small, yellow filly with a cherry-red mane and tail with a matching bow in her mane burst  through the front door. “Applejack!” She cried. “Yer home!”

Applejack nuzzled her. “Yeah, I’m back. We had to take a quick trip to Canterlot.” She explained, not going into details.

The filly looked at Applejack for a moment. “Well,” she said. “Alright. Hey, who’s this pony with ya?” She added, noticing me for the first time.

“This mare’s name is Modpony. She’ll be stayin’ with us for a while.” Applejack introduced me to the small filly.

“Nice to meet ya Miss Modpony!” She said, shaking my hoof. “Mah name’s Applebloom. Ah’m AJ’s lil sister.”

“Nice to meet you Applebloom.” I smiled, looking back at Applejack. “Should we get going inside?”

Applejack nodded. “I suppose so. Should probably introduce ya’ll to the rest of my family.” We headed inside and found an elderly green pony sleeping on the couch.

“Granny Smith?” Applejack said, waking up the mare. “Wake up fer a moment. I’d like to introduce ya’ll to our guest, Modpony.”

The elderly pony approached me slowly, with a welcoming smile on her face. “Oh hello there! I’m Granny Smith. It’s nice to meet you, Mudpony!”

“Modpony.” I politely corrected. “And It’s nice to meet you too, Granny Smith.”

Applejack led me up to my room to avoid a long story on Ponyville history. She opened the door to reveal my room. There was a small window on the opposite side of the room, looking out over the expansive, tree-covered hills of Sweet Apple Acres. There was a small, but not too small, bed, and a large dresser in the room. There was also a door in the room which I could only assume led to a closet.

“I’m mighty sorry that it’s a bit cozy in here, but I hope you’ll be comfortable enough.” She apologized.

“It’s alright Applejack.” I assured. “It’s nice enough for you to offer hospitality to me anyways.”

“Well, ah hope you get enough sleep. We wake up early ‘round here.”

“I’m sure I will. Thanks again AJ!”

Applejack exited the room to leave me with it. I settled down on the bed to get some sleep. I wonder how Mike’s settling down with the bookworm.

Twilight’s House, 9:15 P.M.

Mike’s POV

“And we’re here! Spike?” Twilight called. “Spiiike?”

There was a faint thumping, followed by the small purple dragon walking down the stairs.

“Hey Twi!” Spike said. “Where have you been?!”

“I was taking care of some sudden issues that arose with the Princesses.” She explained. “You remember Mike, right?”

“Yeah.” He said, turning to look at me. “Why is he back here?”

“He’s going to be staying with us for a while. I hope that’s alright with you.”

Spike seemed unsure at first but then he turned and extended a fist to me for a fistbump. “Alright, seems good to me.” He said. I accepted the fistbump. Twilight turned to head upstairs, claiming she needed to take a shower.

“So Mike,” Spike said, looking up at me with folded arms. “Don’t think you can go be trying any funny business with Twilight, you hear?”

I was taken aback at this. ME? Hit on TWILIGHT? Not really my kinda mare. I looked down at Spike and held up my hoof. “I solemnly swear that I will not try any funny business with Twilight Sparkle.” I said, half-mockingly, but mostly serious.

“Alright bro, I trust ya.” He said, extending his fist once more. “C’mon, I’ll show ya around the library real quick.” He said, leading me over to the main room.

Rainbow Dash’s House, 9:00 P.M.

My POV

As Rainbow’s house came into view, I was one hundered percent amazed. The pictures in the show just didn’t sell to the looks of her house. For one- IT WAS HUGE! It had to be the largest place of residence next to the castle. The rainbow waterfalls were absolutely glorious, and once you landed on the cloud, it was like standing on a giant, sumptuous marshmallow. She led us into her home, opening the door. The interior was nothing short of incredible. “Well guys, here we are!” She announced to us. Mocha and I could only stand there slack-jawed. “Impressed?” She asked, giggling a little.

“Its… beautiful” I stammered, finding it hard to take in the surroundings. It was just so incredible!

“Alright then… uhh… I only have one guest room, so one of you will have to sleep on the couch or something. Sorry.” She said, obviously meaning it when she said she was sorry.

“Uh, you can have the guest room Mocha. I slept on the floor all the time anyways.” I said. It was true. I really do only sleep on the floor anyways because my mattress at home was broken and my mom was too lazy to get it fixed.

“Oh, alright. Thanks Dash!” Mocha smiled.

“No prob.” Rainbow and I said at the exact same time. Rainbow Dash just kind of looked at me sideways. I chuckled and slowly backed towards the living room. Before I had to explain anything, however, there was a knock at the door. Dash went to go answer it. Mocha and I both followed her to the door.

“Oh, hey Blue!” Dash exclaimed. At the door stood a cobalt blue Pegasus stallion. He had a neatly combed yellow mane and tail, and a tornado cutie mark. He was average sized, if maybe a bit larger than me. I immediately recognized who this pony was. It was Blue Breeze. I knew plenty about him. He is the main character of a series of fan fictions I read. And he was standing right in front of me. Well, right in front of Rainbow Dash. But then something clicked in my head; Blue was Rainbow Dash’s coltfriend. After a couple moments of putting two and two together, I realized that this meant I couldn’t date Rainbow Dash. I don’t know what sparked it, but something made my blood boil.

“BLUE BREEZE!!!” I shouted at the top of my lungs.

He calmly turned towards me and asked, “Yes? Who are you?”

“My name is Flare Runner and I think I might like Rainbow Dash a bit more than you do, you jackflank!” I growled, leaping at Blue.

Queue fight music.

Before I get into the fight, I should explain that Blue Breeze has magical powers despite being a Pegasus. More specifically, he can use ranged attacks involving wind. I knew of these powers (of course), and knew that I’d need to keep my distance, lest I not be able to move out of the way.

My forehoof struck his face, sending him tumbling out the front door. He sprang back up, wings glowing with a white energy. Usually his opponents would be confused and just kind of stand there, allowing themselves to get blown away by sharp blades of wind. I was not confused. No, I was prepared. As two white blades of wind had just shot out from his wings, I rolled out of the way, behind a pillar of clouds.

“I know what you’re capable of Blue.” I called out. “And its not going to happen.” I darted from pillar to pillar to avoid the blades slicing through the air. But after about two minutes of this, I finally peeked out and kind of died a little inside. Standing next to Blue Breeze was a black Pegasus stallion about his size with a black and red mane and tail, a tri-colored lightning bolt for a cutie mark, and a MASSIVE black Pegasus stallion with a black yellow and red mane. The former was Dark Lightning, a Pegasus pony who could do pretty much whatever he damn well pleased with lightning, right from his hooves. The latter was Drax, who didn’t have any special magical abilities, but he could kick anypony’s ass any day. If there was thing I knew right then, it was that I was mortally fucked. I backed myself right into a pillar. Yup. I was fucked. Before I could surrender, Dark Lightning flew directly towards me, a hoof crackling with electricity. I closed my eyes and prepared to meet a shocking death. It never happened. I opened my eyes slightly to see Drax and Blue looking sideways. I looked to where they were looking. I saw a knocked-down Dark Lightning and Rainbow Dash standing near him.

“Dash, what was that for? We needed to kick the shit out of him!” Dark yelled.

He was kind of right. I did need an ass-kicking, yet for some reason Dash had saved me.

“Look guys, here’s the deal. Nopony needs a flank-kicking, and Flare, you should be ashamed of yourself. Somehow you knew that I was dating Blue, but I’m not going to question it for now. Blue got here first, and he deserves having me. And Blue, you shouldn’t have gotten sucked into this. Flare, I can tell that you love me, but I love Blue right now. I’m sorry to break your heart bro.” We all looked at the ground.

After about half an hour of apologizing and stuff, the group of friends I knew of went home, and Dash, Mocha, and myself went to go get some much-needed adrenaline-fueled sleep. There was only one thing I knew: I had barely avoided getting my flank kicked. Hard.