Lauren Faust meets an OC Alicorn
Original version (Before I redid it)
Celestia looked up. She had made a big mistake. Hundreds upon thousands of portals opened up and OC Alicorns rained down upon the land of Equestria. She was done for. Lauren Faust was due to visit any time now, and she wouldn’t be pleased.
Just as Celestia had thought, Faust appeared minutes later with a cheerful smile on her face. It slowly faded into a frown and her fists balled as she saw all of the OC Alicorns roaming about. She looked directly at Celestia. “What... The fuck... Have you done!? I trust you with all of this power, and you still let all of these bullshit excuses for Original Characters into Equestria!? Do you know what you’ve done!?” She unleashed a flurry of profanities at Celestia.
“I’m sorry, your majesty. I didn’t know-” She was cut off by Faust.
“I don’t want your apologies, I want these faggots gone! Kill them, kill the faggot who designed them, I don’t care! Get them out of Equestria!” She glared at Celestia.
Celestia looked down ashamedly and nodded. “Yes, your highness. I’ll get right to it.” Her horn glowed and a wave of magic washed over the land. It cleared away to reveal... Nothing. Nothing had happened.
Faust bitch-slapped Celestia. “I’ll have to do this myself then.” She ran around rampaging, tearing off heads and severing limbs from every OC she ran past. She flailed around like a wet noodle, beating the OC Alicorns over their heads with their own limbs. She stopped suddenly. “Oh wait, you guys aren’t real!” They all disappeared in an instant.
THE MOTHERFUCKING END.
Lauren Faust meets an OC Alicorn
Later that day, another OC Alicorn walked up to Lauren Faust with a cocky smile.
Faust smiled politely. “Oh, hello! I haven’t seen you around here. Are you another one of those ‘Original Characters’?”
The OC smiled. “Indeed I am, Mrs. Faust. I have some things I wish to discuss with you.”
She nodded. “Ask away!”
He smirked and told her every ‘flaw’ he had found with her characters. By the end of it, Faust was resting her head on her hand. “...and I can do better than every pony you’ve created! Jeez. I control the whole universe, I can play every instrument, some of which I made myself, I can use magic to do whatever I want! Hell, I’m more powerful that you!”
With that, Lauren Faust sighed and punched him in the face, tore his arm off, and started beating him over the head with it. She did it again with each limb. Over and over.
The OC just grinned. You think that does anything? His horn glowed and his limbs grew back. Faust thought of fanfics she’d read and got a brilliant idea. She ripped off his horn and shoved it down his throat. “That ought to shut you the fuck up.”
She ripped off both of his wings and crumpled them, shoving them into his mouth too. Faust then repeated what she did with his limbs, beating him over the head over and over until she got tired of it and just ripped off his head. She stomped of his body a good number of times and then drop-kicked his head.
THE. MOTHERFUCKING. END.