Death By Puns (And Tentacles)

Click... shuffle... Slap slap slap slap slap slap...

Twilight groaned as the light next to Spike’s special little doggie bed was turned on, followed by a series of easily identifiable sounds. She sighed as she sat up in bed to find him predictably laying there on his back, sprawled out as much as he could, and reading a comic book with one claw. The other claw was under his blanket, visibly moving up and down beneath it as he enthusiastically stroked both his double dragon meats.

“Spike, you really need to go to sleep!” sighed Twilight.

“Aw, two more minutes Twilight!” Spike begged, looking up at her, “I’m just getting to a really good part!” He hopped out of his bed, padding across the floor to Twilight’s bed with the comic book, his hard little dragon dicks bouncing a bit as he walked, plural since he had a hemipenis like most dragons. “The Mane-iac is about to—“

“The Mane-iac?” Twilight tilted her head, butting him off.

“The Power Ponies’ most evil nemesis!” Spike nodded, hopping up onto the bed and bouncing up where Twilight could see as he turned the open comic for her to look at. He turned back a bit in the book, “She was the power-mad owner of a hair-care product company.” Spike pointed at a mare looking over vats of chemicals, then another panel of her falling into one, “A tragic accident at her shampoo factory in Maretropolis not only gave her mane strange new powers, but also caused her to go completely insane!” He grinned, pointing to another panel where she was emerging from the vat as a crazed purple pony with green tentacle hair, then the next few panels where she was using said hair to mass-rape her the workers at her factory.

“She and her henchponies are planning to break into the Maretropolis Museum and steal the Electro-Orb, so she can use it to power up her doomsday device!” Spike continued as he turned further into the book, pointing to a glowing orb in a museum's display casing. He then rolled his eyes and lowered the comic book, “Of course, the Mane-iac wouldn’t have even known if Hum Drum hadn’t slipped up and told her all about it.”

“Hum Drum?” she said, trying to blink the sleepy fog from her eyes.

“Nah, the guy in the blue boots and pointless red cape,” Spike showed her another page, though she didn’t get too good of a look aside from the character being in said goofy clothing, “The Power Ponies’ bumbling and totally useless sidekick.” He then became a bit more dramatic, complete with turning around and putting his claws in the air, “The Power Ponies have to stop the Mane-iac or Maretropolis is doooooomed!”

“Believe me Spike,” Twilight smirked, “If anypony understands what it’s like to get caught up in a really good, even sexy, book, it’s me. But if we’re going to make any progress fixing up Luna and Celestia’s old castle tomorrow, we all have to do our part. We don’t want to be too tired from masturbating all night to lend a hoof... or claw.”

“Okay, Okay,” Spike assured her, plodding back to his bed, “I’m going to bed. Goodnight.”

Twilight lay back down, only to hear a patting noise. She looked over to see Spike reaching out from under his cover towards his comic book, feeling around for it in the dark. Twilight smirked, picking up the comic book in her magic, which he saw when he peaked out from under the cover. He looked sheepish at having been caught after saying he’d go to bed, but he just looked so adorable.

“Two more minutes...” Twilight gave in for her cute little assistant.

“Yes!” Spike hopped out from under his blanket, clicking the light next to his bed on again. He did a flip, landing on his back, and this time holding the book open with his hind claws so that both of his hands were free to pull his scales back and whip out the goods. His eyes focused on the comic with interest as each hand slowly stroked one of his quickly hardening shafts, not bothering to cover up again to do so.

“Yeah, I think I see the real reason you can’t sleep,” Twilight chuckled.

“Well I could probably go to sleep faster if somepony helped me out with it,” Spike paused his activities, looking up at her with somewhat adorable hope in his eyes.

Twilight laughed, “Oh all right, but JUST a quickie, and you go to sleep straight after you get off, deal?”

“Deal!” Spike grinned widely.

Twilight uncovered once more, staggering just a bit while yawning as she trotted over to his bed again. He stayed in the same position, but took the comic book into his foreclaws now instead, splaying out his hind legs so she could ‘assist’ him. Twilight leaned her head down, taking a deep breath, as the scent of horny dragon wasn’t entirely unpleasant, and then ran her tongue up his lower length, from where it protruded from his reptilian slit to the tapered tip.

She did feel a bit like an object when he pulled her night cap off so he could prop his comic on her head as he continued reading it, but let it go for the time being. She lapped at him several more times before sliding her warm muzzle over both of his lengths, wrapping her tongue around one, then the other, then pushing down fully and swallowing against the tips in turn.

“Phew,” panted Spike, “I’d never say this to her, but you’re better at this than Rarity.”

“You flatterer, you,” Twilight smiled between slurps before pushing her muzzle back down, working into a smooth thrusting motion. She spread out her own hind legs, propping herself on one front leg as she continued so she could reach her other front hoof between her own legs, rubbing at her increasingly moist nethers.

Twilight worked her head faster, feeling him throb, with the comic still atop her head. As typical for a young male, he was already seconds from popping.

“Yeah right there Twi...” Spike drooled, definitely not reading the comic at the moment.

Spike held her head more tightly, giving several hard thrusts upwards with his hips before his throbbing dragon meats exploded in her maw. She gagged just a bit, but managed to swallow his load, gulping several times against his tips, not particularly wanting to have to clean up after it before she went to bed.

“Hey why don’t you take a look at the comic while I do you?” Spike asked.

“We can’t drag this out any later Spike,” Twilight smirked, putting her night cap back on.

“Oh come on, you’re just gonna rub one out once you’re back in bed,” said Spike, accurately enough, “You know I can get you to pop faster with my tongue.”

Twilight sighed, “Okay, okay, but for real you HAVE to sleep after this.”

Twilight moseyed back to her bed, sliding in on her back, not covering herself yet, and splaying out her own hind legs. She figured she may as well take a look, so she hovered the comic book over her face to flip through it as she lay there. Spike was happy enough to hop out of bed yet again and crawl into hers. Twilight shivered as she felt the warmth of his eager breath against her moist slit, and pushed her hips up slightly as his maw pushed against her. He slid his tongue between her labia and spun it around, lapping out tonguefuls of her cunt honey as he felt about.

Twilight chrred lightly as Spike continued winding his ridiculously long tongue around in her, going deep enough to literally lick her cervix. A lot of ponies wondered why an exceptionally fuckable mare like Rarity was banging a little boy, but since Rarity convinced Twilight to give his tongue a try, she no longer had any doubts about what Rarity saw in him.

Finally she arched her back, whimpering and squirming as he pushed her over. Her purple pony princess pussy convulsed over his draconic muzzle, and he guzzled down her orgasmic juices as it wet his face. He gave one last slurp, tilting his head back and literally gargling her femme-cum before finally being done.

“Night, Twi,” Spike licked his lips, then went to pull himself under Twilight’s covers to sleep with her.

“Spike,” she smiled, and he laughed awkwardly before sliding out of her bed and going back to his. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to sleep in the same bed with him, but Spike had a tendency to get amorous in his sleep; last time he’d slept in her bed she woke up to him literally fucking her while moaning Rarity’s name.

She slipped back under her covers, and finally wasn’t woken up by further noises.