Ponyville City, a small insignificant town where the youth invest their time and effort into their popularity, especially in public high school. A most insidious place where no sane person with money would send their children, to a place of mind numbing monotony in between being thrown to the sharks of both genders that will tear you apart, such is the way of the high school hierarchy. But sometimes it takes the worst to shake it up and bring upon those poor souls at the bottom hope.

"Why are you reading 'The Old Man and the Sea'? Hemingneigh is such a bitch." said Sunset, feet up on the coffee table in the library that Twilight had nicely set up. To her left in a matching comfy looking chair was Twilight as she idly flipped a page.

"I wanted something light today. Besides, it's as good a mood piece as 'Heart of Darkness'." replied Twilight, picking her cup of tea up from the table and having a quick sip.

"Yeah but Trotrad is more interesting, at least the shit he writes about was when people really believed in triumph of the human spirit before people started getting all limp dicked and PC." said Sunset, flipping another page in her book, receiving only a small hum from Twilight as they continued to read together.

After awhile, Twilight finally broke the silence "Has Luna been acting... weird? In the past week?"

"Weird how?"

"Well, on the one day she was bitchy as usual. But then the next day she asked to see my form when I magically changed into my mage outfit."

"So?"

"She had a pad and pencil..."

"Taking notes?"

"I caught a glimpse and she'd made a highly detailed sketch."

"Huh." said Sunset, glancing up from her book and appearing to give this some thought now. "Now that you mention it, instead of bitching me out for the raver I threw two days ago, she just said to clean it up after giving me a spanking." Furrowing her brow, Sunset took a moment before asking "You think she's getting laid or found a dealer?"

"Who knows. Either way I need a shower." said Sunset, setting her book aside and standing up.

"I think I'll change into something more comfortable. There's a documentary on soon and there's a pint of double chocolate peanut butter fudge swirl calling my name." said Twilight, standing as well.

"Fatty."

"Whore."

Meanwhile down below in a first floor bathroom, a certain goddess disguised as her sister was putting the last finishing touches on her hair dye. Contact lenses were easy enough but for all the magic in the world, they didn't have a dye that could mimic her sister's shade? Well, it might not sparkly like stars in the night sky, but at least it was blue right? Celestia gave a light sigh and washer her hands, grinning as she heard her sister's voice speak up.

'This is torture and I hate you.'

'Oh come on now, I have been giving you lessons left and right this past week! Have you learned nothing, yet?' thought Celestia, tossing away the stained rubber gloves into the trash before leaving.

'I've learned you take FAR too many liberties and you can be as bad as Sunset when soliciting the just turned legal of the fairer sex!' groused Luna, who would have undoubtedly been pouting if she were in control of her body.

'If that's all you've learned then I'm afraid I'll have to spend more time teaching you.' thought Celestia, mentally giving a playful sigh as she made her way to the pew, greeting someone she had been meeting with for the past couple of days who was standing by Spike, the strange young dragon reaching up to poke at said person's thigh but having his hand slapped away repeatedly.

'Don't you have heavenly duties? I know Raven is good but she's not THAT good.'

'What do you think I do when I let you regain control for a bit? Luna, whatever you may think of me, let it not be known that I am a responsible and mature goddess.' she thought before checking her watch, humming with a big smile on her face before with a snap of her fingers, she summoned both the shower that Sunset was in and the bed that Twilight was changing on. "Good morning Sunset and Twilight." said Celestia, toning down her usual cheer and not trying too hard to cover that she was trying to check the two out. "So nice of you to join us!"

"Okay, there better be a ghost worth at least twenty Heavenly Bits down here or your ass is grass bitch!" spat Sunset, flinging back the shower curtain to glare at "Luna".

"Seriously Luna!? Why by Celestia's beard have you brought us down here?!" squeaked Twilight in an oh so adorable way as she moved fast to finish dressing.

"Now, now, settle down girls." said Celestia, leaning against the pew with her cheek against the palm of her hand. "We do indeed have a grave situation on our hands, one that threatens the very safety of Ponyville City's youth!"

"Yeah I bet." said Sunset, snapping her fingers to summon a towel so that she could start drying off. "Is it so serious it's making your fucking hair leak?" she pointed out.

"Oh nothing like that." said Celestia, waving it off and tucking her hair back over her shoulder quickly "I'd like you to meet someone." she said, stepping out of the way to reveal a smartly dressed woman with her grayish varied hued magenta hair tied back into a tight bun. "This is Abacus Cinch, the principal of Ponyville's one and only academic institution."

"Client? What, we already run out of money and we have to cater to S&M hags?" asked Sunset, snapping her fingers again to summon clean clothes and a brush.

"... if the situation weren't so dire I would walk out the door and never come back to this seedy little den." replied Cinch, face red as she managed to maintain some composure. "Now see here, students have started to go missing. The parents are worried, breathing down my neck, and it's starting to affect the reputation of my school. And after exhausting all other possible avenues, I've come here." she paused, adjusting her glasses before trying to pin the two young women down with a stare. "So, after speaking with Miss Luna, I have no choice but to believe an evil spirit may be behind it and I would like for you two to take care of it." she finished before reeling around and slapping Spike's hand off the back of her skirt.

"So... should we go to your school after hours?" asked Twilight, figuring this would be fairly cut and dry.

"Afraid not. This seems to happen more during the day, so... I've taken the liberty of arranging for you to be enrolled as seniors at the school starting today! We have the uniforms ready and everything!" said Celestia, a big smile on her face as she pulled out said uniforms. White long sleeved shirts that could show off way too much cleavage, a tie and plaid skirts that seemed just a bit too short.

"Seriously?" asked Sunset, quirking a brow at this. "And how long do we have to keep up this fucking charade? I already did my school time."

"Oh why not stay enrolled for the rest of the school year? I'm sure it would give you girls something to do!" said Celestia, eagerly handing off the two school uniforms to Sunset and Twilight. "And besides that, you hookers should do it because I said so since I am in charge. So change into the uniforms and get your god damned asses to school." she added, the most pleasant smile ever on her face.

Sunset and Twilight traded slightly suspicious looks before shrugging and headed off to change.

"N' there's still no sign o' the truck. Ah'm seriously gettin' pissed off Dash!" fumed the blonde cowgirl, dressed in the Ponyville High School section's male uniforms since they came with a comfortable pair of pants that could shield the undies from the prying eyes or the wandering hand. A sentiment shared by the rainbow haired young woman next to her... although it was more because it was too damn hard to run in a skirt without flashing everyone.

"Sounds rough AJ." said Rainbow Dash, yawning and stretching her arms above her head. "And the police haven't helped?"

"No, sum side windin' twat called Officer Night Glider keeps givin' me the brush off. Ah swear, if Ah ever find the lo' down red headed skank that what took the new truck from mah brother, Ah'm gonna-!"

The two senior's attention was cut off when a screech came from behind them, both looking in time to see a red pick up truck hopping the sidewalk and driving right into the quad just outside the main entrance. Both Applejack and Rainbow Dash gave a frightened shout before dodging off to the sides, which turned to be unnecessary when the truck power slid into a stop right in the center of the quad about a foot away from where they had been standing. The doors opened and out game Sunset and Twilight, having accessorized their outfits pretty well, Sunset showing cleavage with some nice punk jewelry (old school not the lame ass shit that passes for punk these days) and Twilight with some nice bracelets and her usual sweater vest.

Once Applejack had recovered, her eyes bugged out seeing both the truck and the low down red headed skank that had taken it "You! That's mah truck!" she barked, scrambling onto her feet and marching over to a bored looking Sunset Shimmer who was flat out ignoring her. "Ya' took that truck from mah brother! Ya' know how long mah family had to save up fer a new truck n' ya' just take it!? Ah oughta'-!"

However she was cut out when Sunset reached a hand over and placed a finger over Applejack's lips, making the blonde silent as the red head lifted up her sunglasses to get a better look at the tall, muscular young woman before her. "Mm, not bad." she said, a sexy smirk on her lips that caused all students that could see to blush. "I think we have some time before classes start for a quickie in my ride."

"Hot..." said Dash, face red as well as she watched the sultry young woman handle her best friend.

Trying to rally, Applejack pushed the finger away from her mouth and tried to soldier on "Lookie here missie! Ah ain't takin' yer crap so-"

Yet again she was rendered silent when Sunset grabbed Applejack's tie and actually yank the tall blonde so that she was stooping down below Sunset's eye level, forcing Applejack to look up and try to ignore the fact that her chin was nice and nestles against Sunset's firm, perky breasts. "You're cute so I'll let that slide, but let's make one thing clear." said Sunset, pushing her sunglasses up so that they rested on top of her head "Don't fuck with a me. M'kay?" Then she smirked before moving Applejack so that she could stand up a little straighter, their lips so close they almost brushed against one another "It'd be a shame if I had to crush you before I got a taste." Then pausing for a beast, she reached her hand up to the farmer's face and push her away "Now beat it hick, I've got work to do."

Face as red as her apples, the blonde stumbled backwards into Rainbow Dash, the athletic girl catching Applejack as they both watched Sunset and Twilight walk away, students following after "... Mother of god." uttered Dash, eyes drawn to Sunset's ample exterior as it swayed away before she pushed Applejack up and followed, the farmer begrudgingly following as well... but only because they had to get to classes soon.

"Man, the dudes and chicks here are just as thirsty as the ones back at the mage academy." said Sunset, paying little to no attention to the crowd.

"I know, and they aren't even aware of how easy you are yet." commented Twilight, pulling a small map out of the pocket of her skirt and opening it up to take a look. "Now let's see, where to start..."

"Is there any particular reason the way is blocked, darlings?" came a rather posh sounding voice from behind them. All turned to see a senior with perfectly coiffed purple hair and fair skin, sitting upon a throne being carried by half of the foot ball team with a couple other popular girls and cheerleaders surrounding her.

"Rarity..." grumbled Dash, not looking too keen on speaking with the other senior.

"Rainbow darling, I didn't see you down there. Could Applejack and yourself please clear the way? I don't want to be late for class."

"Shove it." snapped Applejack, deciding Rarity was the next best thing to take her anger out on.

"Ooo, the cowgirl has some claws." said Sunset, stepping up next to the blonde and looking over Rarity and her entourage. "So, what the fuck is this all about?"

"Mm, what's this? New faces? Well, the two of you do have the right look, especially you darling, cute in a studious sort of way." said Rarity, smirking and giving Twilight a wink, to which the mage replied with a raised brow. "I suppose since the both of you are new I can forgive your lack of knowledge. But I am the one who rules this school."

"Yeah you're not the principal." Sunset deadpanned.

"We actually met her and she's hotter." added Twilight, a statement that made Rarity's eyebrow twitch.

"Ahem. My name is Rarity. But there are those who call me Queen Rarity, your majesty or goddess." That last one actually made Sunset outright snort and Twilight cover her mouth to stifle the giggle. "If the crowd will give an example, please?" said Rarity, motioning to the crowd which started to chant her name and various monikers, but it soon halted when Sunset simply yawned.

"Whatever, I don't got time for this shit, let's go Twi." said Sunset, turning around and walking away from Rarity's entourage.

"Mm. Honestly this is starting to become cringy, she's trying far too hard to overcompensate." said Twilight, turning and walking away as well.

"What?" said Rarity, eyebrow twitching once more "I am not overcompensating for anything! And don't you dare walk out on me!"

But her warning was left unheard and throughout the rest of the week Sunset and Twilight continued their unintentional take over of the school! Between Sunset's crude, too cool attitude and Twilight's adorably bookish demeanor they left Rarity in the dust. Both guys and girls began to fawn over them, wanting to copy their style, cater for their affection and attention! Eye twitching quickly became the norm for Rarity, not believing how Sunset and Twilight were winning over both the common student and the popular ones, their insignia of sun and stars replacing her diamonds, and worst of all... TWILIGHT WOULD NOT GO OUT ON A DATE WITH HER!

"Alright listen up pud thumpers!" called coach Ironwill, pointing to the white board where he had drawn up that day's sex ed class. "All of you are far too young for sex! With all of that blood rushing and hormones racing, if ya' do it you'll die because you'll explode twice! Once in the genitals and again in the head! But if you horny maggots want to take that risk you need knowledge and proper protection!"

"Sweet, check this out." said Sunset, completely ignoring the lecture as she placed an action figure of herself on Twilight's desk, the two of course sitting next to each other in the back. "That pink haired chick and her geek friends have been making all sorts of shit like this of us. It's completely anatomically correct and very flexible."

"The Sunset Shimmer fetish action figure collection, gotta' collect 'em all." joked Twilight, not looking up from her book as she sipped from the cup of coffee they'd picked up in between classes. "You know, there is still a spirit still around abducting students."

"And we'll get to that shit." said Sunset, seeming totally unconcerned before something was passed back to her "Huh?" she asked, checking it out before seeing it was a condom, a light smirk playing on her lips as she opened the container, placed the tip of it on the end of her pencil and shot it like a rubber band at the back of Rainbow Dash's head, the young woman scowling and shooting a glare at Sunset... well, sort of a glare. It was hard to be mad when the red head was so fucking hot.

"HELP! Emergency! EMERGNECY!" cried a high pitched, hyperactive voice that busted into the classroom, a plump student with pink hair running up to Sunset and Twilight. "You two! You guys mentioned mage academy? The place with the really powerful spell casters? YOU GOTTA' HELP!" she cried, baby blue eyes watering with un-shed tears.

"Slow your roll spaz." said Sunset.

".... Pinkie Pie, right?" asked Twilight, marking her place in her book before looking at the girl. "What's wrong?"

"My friends have gone missing!" wailed Pinkie Pie, pulling out her smart phone and showing pictures of a destroyed locker with ruined Sunset and Twilight merchandise.

"Hm, could be the spirit." mused Twilight before glancing over to Sunset who gave a light shrug.

"Oooo, could be! Because my right ear was itching and I sneezed three times and my two pinkie toes hurt! That's the sure sign a spirit is around and I've been getting that feeling a lot since students started disappearing!" said Pinkie Pie.

"Riiiiight. So you can actually detect spirits?" asked Sunset with a raised brow.

"Totally! If you want we can come back tonight and track it!"

"Why tonight?" asked Twilight.

"Duh, cause that's how it happened in the TV show!" said Pinkie Pie, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Out on the football field late at night, Sunset and Twilight walked around, watching as Pinkie twitched and shook about, heading this way and that randomly. "Pinkie. Are you sure you can sense spirits or did you just snort a whole bag of sugar?" asked Sunset, growing impatient.

"Nope! I only had one tray of cupcakes before we left home!" said Pinkie Pie before pointing over to the bleachers just as spotlights went on "There!"

Up on the bleachers were a slew of football players and cheerleaders, with Rarity standing right at the top with her arms crossed. "Well isn't this delightful. And I thought I would have to wait much longer before pouncing on you two uncouth bitches." she said, smirking before snapping her fingers, causing two of the football players to step forward, holding a tied up Applejack and Rainbow Dash who struggled as hard as they could to break free. "And two of my jealous ex-friends even tagged along. The night just keeps getting better and better."

"Jealous nuthin'! Ya' turned into a right bitch when ya' let the popularity get to yer' head a month ago!" snapped Applejack.

"Pah, so you say darling. But not even you can deny how big I was, how popular, how I showered this school in my influence and spread it all over the student body!"

"Gross." deadpanned Sunset.

"But then you two came and ruined everything! And you, Twilight, you wouldn't even give me a second glance or notice my romantic advances!" fumed Rarity, fists clenched as she glared down at the two mages.

".... she's been flirting with me?" asked Twilight, clearly not recalling as she glanced over to Sunset for confirmation.

"Very well, if I haven't gotten your attention before... maybe I'll have it now!" with that Rarity jumped off into a group of football players, the burly guys throwing her up into the air where she was silhouetted by the moon as she transformed, clothes bursting as fur covered skin, ears elongating, mouth forming into a muzzle. When she landed back on the ground, she was a fully anthropomorphic canine with pure white fur, her hair still in place and a fabulous collar with diamonds embedded into it.

"... huh, that was the one thing I didn't predict, her turning into a furry." mused Sunset, taking off her panties as Twilight took off her stockings.

"True, I expected something more cliche, like a bee." agreed the nerd, katanas at the ready as they watched the rest of Rarity's pack transform as well.

"It's play time boys and girls, fetch my diamond dogs!" declared Rarity, pointing to the two mages and causing them all to charge.

"Let's finish this quickly, I should be home curled up with that new book I got in the mail." said Twilight.

"Works for me, let's put them in the dog house!" agreed Sunset, both of them jumping out of the way in time to avoid being dog piled by the foot ball players.

"Here guys!" called Pinkie Pie, having reappeared with a cart of field hockey equipment.

"That'll work. Hey guys!" called Twilight, turning the cart over and letting the balls spill out onto the field, hitting them with her katanas to send them flying and causing the foot ball players to chase after them. While they were distracted, Twilight came up and sliced into their dollars on a hunch, grinning when she saw them disintegrate and change the guys back to normal. "Thought so. Hey Sunset! Aim for the collars! It's how Rarity is controlling these guys!"

"Figures. Alright, bring it on then!" said Sunset, smirking as she charged to the cheerleaders, using impeccable aim to shoot the collars right off their necks and breaking the transformation.

"Hey! What about us!" called Dash, her and Applejack still struggling around on the ground where they'd been left. Up until Sunset shot at their bindings and freed them.

"Ya' coulda' hit us ya' jackass!" snapped the blonde before scrambling to her feet, running over to Pinkie and away from Rarity who looked to be having a tantrum.

"You two are absolutely infuriating!" cried Rarity, nearly howling as the two mages ran towards her. Snarling, she took in a deep breath before letting out an ear splitting howl. It hit the mages full force, knocking them down and nearly deafening them as their heads began to ring. Panting, Rarity growled and ran forward, leaping into the air with razor sharp claws bared, ready to slice the two young women to ribbons!

And then she had balls in her face.

"Keep swinging!" called Dash, her, Applejack and Pinkie Pie armed with field hockey sticks as they kept slapping more balls up into the air to pelt the white canine with.

Rarity landed and raised her arms to shield herself "Ow! OW! Stop that-! OUCH! You're ruining my fur!" she whined before she heard a click and something pressing to the back of her head, causing Rarity to freeze. "... um, truce?"

"Yeah no. You've been a bad bitch. NOW REPENT MOTHER FUCKER!" said Sunset, pulling the trigger and causing the other young woman to explode, the bell ringing as Rarity was turned to normal, eyes rolling into the back of her head as she fainted right then and there, caught by Twilight's arm while Sunset caught the Heavenly Bits "Only ten? What is it with these cheap ass ho's lately?"

"Hey! We found my friends! They were locked up in the sports equipment shed!" called Pinkie Pie, herding out a small group of confused nerds onto the field to join the confused jocks, muscle guys, cheerleaders and hot chicks.

"Mmm, hello smorgasm board." said Sunset, eying a few potential candidates.

"I guess you earned it. I'll clean up here." sighed Twilight, watching as Sunset went off, picking quite a few lucky guys and gals to take to the equipment shed before looking at Rarity.

"So, she normal now?" asked Dash, having watched wantingly as Sunset waltzed off with some new friends before looking to Rarity.

"She should be. I guess all that negative energy of the pressure and cut throat tactics to be popular chose her to be a host. But everything is in balance now." said Twilight, letting Applejack pick the unconscious fashionista up in her arms.

"Ah'll take 'er home then. Hopefully we cin' go back ta' being friends. Speaking o' which, yer friend ain't really-"

"YES! Oh god YES!" came a cry from the shed, making Rainbow Dash and Applejack blush while Twilight simply rolled her eyes as more touchdowns were scored.

Author's Note

I'm sorry but it's so fun writing for a pervy Celestia.

I don't think I could ever go as crude as in the show. Cause if you watched this episode then you know I left out some golden lines. However I dunno if it's necessary (I meant outside of when they can totally work and I can use them because why wouldn't I?) But this is also MLP, they're not quite Panty and Stocking so it's not gonna be the same.

Still, I hope my level of raunchy crudeness can satisfy you lovelies and I hope you enjoyed the chapter!