1000 Ways To Die

Date: February 7, 2012
Location: Ponyville, Outside Ponyville Hospital

Poor pony covered in bandages. You'd probably look at this pony and feel bad for him. Well get that out of your brain. This pony doesn't deserve any sympathy. He is, however, lucky to be alive. Say hello to Quick Bit. He was found with third degree burns over ninety percent of his body. The reason he was burnt was that he fucked with the wrong ponies. If you wind the clock back a couple months earlier, he looked completely normal.

*Months Earlier*

"I got anything you need as long as you got the bits for it." Quick Bit said to a pony that looked like he was out of his mind.

"Here now gimmie the stuff!!" The pony shouted, shoving a bag of bits in Quick Bits face.

Quick Bit gave him a bag full of cocaine and was ready to wait for the next customers. Life was good and today was going to get better. He was going to make a deal with a pony that was going to give him a whole lot of bits for a block of cocaine. Quick Bit went to the ponies house. As he enters, he made the deal with the pony. However, the pony told him to stay put.

"Wait on sec while I check something." The pony said. He inspected the block of cocaine. He cracked it a bit and saw that only one third was cocaine. While the rest was dry wall. "Fellas!! Take care of him!!" The pony shouted, leaving the house.

Quick Bit heard that and tried to leave. Too bad the two big ponies tied him up to a chair and took out some gasoline. They gagged him with tape. They covered him with gasoline, lit up a match, smiled at him, and then he was lit up. The ponies left them there for dead. After a couple of hours police came after a pony next door complained of the smell of smoke coming from the next house. They found Quick Bit alive. Completely burnt, but alive.

*Months Later*

Quick Bit was now covered in bandages and looked like a mummy. He made a deal with one of his friends who had him in a wheelchair taking him outside to the back of the hospital near a ramp. Once they were outside his friend began to take something out of his saddle bag

"You’re lucky we still got me as a friend. Oh, and I brought you what you wanted." His friend said taking out a cigarette and a lighter from his saddle bag. "We got five minutes then you got to go back inside."

Quick Bit was happy. His friend put the cigarette in his mouth. Yes, Quick Bit was a drug dealer, but he also loved drugs. Especially Nicotine. His friend lit the cigarette, and Quick Bit began smoking away. His friend went to go take a leak. He would be back. Quick Bit kept on smoking. His cigarette began to get smaller. Then suddenly the butt of the cigarette landed on the bandages wrapped all over him.

*Fwosh!!*

In a matter of seconds Quick Bit bandages that were soaked with a highly flammable ointment lit up. "AHHHHHH!!!! HELP!!!!" Quick Bit tried to shout for help. Sadly, nopony was at the back of the hospital. Helpless and nopony to help. Things got even worse. The wheelchair he was one shifted out of gear, and he went down. As soon as the wheelchair made it to the bottom. His oxygen tank on his wheelchair exploded.

*Boom!!!*

He's friend came back and saw Quick Bit's body still burning on the wheelchair. "Ahhh!! Fuck this I'm outta here!!" He said running off.

Hey, Snowheart, you found Quick Bit's body later. What happened to his poor body?

"This ponies body that had third degree burns turned into fourth degree burns. Fourth-degree burns destroy the skin and damage underlying tissues, muscles, tendons, and bones. He was being burnt pretty much down to the bone and is very painful. Teeth may be recognizable if lucky to identify a corpse. However, we already knew who this pony was so that didn't matter. Fourth-degree burns can cause permanent motor damage, disfigurement, disability, and just like this pony death."

Quick Bit was a pony that sold drugs and did anything for a quick bit. Sadly, his life went up in flames. Hey Quick Bit...Got a light.

Way To Die #155: Butt Fucked