Twilight awakened from a strange dream and rolled over in her bed to look at her clock. Since it was Saturday, she’d allowed herself to sleep in by an hour. But considering she hadn’t fallen asleep until 3 AM, she wasn’t as well-rested as she should’ve been, and thus lacked her normal (albeit temporary) morning perkiness. She got up and made her own coffee, with lots of cream.

“It’s just a dream,” She said to herself.

“Twilight!” Alcatraz said, apparently waiting for her sitting on a beanbag.

“No!”

Alcatraz laughed as if there were an additional part to the joke that only he understood, awakening Spike, who came to see what the fuss was while still wearing his blanket.

“It’s not funny! I dreamt you showed me your- Never mind!" Twilight reproached, still shaken from her dream. Spike snickered at her discomfort.

Alcatraz removed his helmet to reveal his now shaven features and gave her a look that silently implied an “Oh really?” on his part.

She continued her horrified look, giving him his answer.

“Oh wait, you’re serious. Let me laugh even harder!” And laugh harder he did. He was literally clutching his sides and laying on the floor, his mirth infecting Spike, who broke into open laughter alongside him.

“C’mon, Twilight, lighten up!” Spike added with a smile. “I mean, there are way worse dreams to have.”

“I guess,” She sighed. “What are you doing here anyway?”

“Well, I thought I’d ask for your help planning the day. Considering I’m meeting your Princesses tonight, I might as well get ready.”

“Sure, let me read the paper first.” She agreed. “Spike?”

“On it,” Spike yawned. He walked out the door, and came back a few seconds later with a roll of newspaper in his hand. He tossed it to Twilight, who grabbed it with her magic and opened it. She sat down and scanned the front page.

“Let’s see here,” She yawned. “A few dozen dead in Ambleppo; nothing new. We’re way ahead of Chineigh in the Olympics; good to hear. Glenn Buck decries Luna’s ‘Socialist-Nazi-Muslim agenda’; what the buck does that even mean?”

“If he’s anything like Glenn Beck, it just means he’s being a race-baiting cocksucker as usual.”

“Sounds about right. Uh, what else? Pony State scandal stuff. Let’s see what we’ve got in local news.” Her expression changed to one of anger. “'Newcomer tells tall tales and beats bar owner Berry in booze binge!?' Alcatraz, you promised me you weren’t going to drink last night!”

“I didn’t say who I promised to!” Alcatraz replied defensively.

“What do you mean? It was implied you promised to me!”

“I was, uh, getting back at myself for all the times I nodded off in Spanish class in high school! I deprived myself of an important second language, and I needed to get revenge for it! So I drank three-and-a-half bottles of Wild Pegasus Apple Whiskey to not just betray my own trust, but beat my faith in people who are me to a pulp!”

“That doesn’t make any sense!”

“It does to me, and that’s what matters.”

“Ugh.” Twilight facehoofed. “Okay, will I have to worry about your behavior tonight?”

“Nope.”

Maybe. Depends how douche-y the princesses and their entourage are.

“Then we’ll just need to get you something to wear over your suit. Hopefully Rarity can make something on such short notice.”

Alcatraz stood up, and Spike jumped to attention at the sound of his crush’s name.

“Where’s Rarity live?” Alcatraz asked.

“I’ll take you there,” Spike offered.

“Thanks dude, just let me drop off a few things in my APC.”

“I’ll pick up my dress later,” Twilight added.

The dragon and soldier departed, walking silently for several minutes. Alcatraz found the silence odd in that it was only between them. The inhabitants of Ponyville all seemed to go about their business with only the occasional glance at him, showing an apparent lack of xenophobia.

“So uh, Alcatraz?” Spike started.

“Yeah?”

“What is it you do? I mean, I wasn’t at that town assembly yesterday, so could you fill me in?”

How do I break it to a kid that I kill people for a living?

“Uhhhh…” Suddenly, music started to play out of nowhere. “What the fuck?”

Pinkie appeared, swinging by on what appeared to be an organic, white substance. She hopped in front of the two and began performing acrobatics to the music’s rhythym.

“Alcatraz, Alcatraz,
To stop him you’ll need more than just a SPAS
Fights bad guys, anytime, swats them down, just like flies
Look out, here comes the Alcatraz!
‘Is he strong?’ Listen bud
He’s got nano-stuff in his blood
‘Can he jump, from ledge to ledge?
Take a look overhead
Hey there, here comes the Alcatraz!
In the chill of night, at the scene of the fight
Like a beam of light, he arrives to turn the tide
Alcatraz , Alcatraz, friendly neighborhood Alcatraz
Can’t say that, he’s ignored
But action is, his reward
To him, life is a great big game-a
Wherever there’s a gang-up
You’ll find the Alcatraaaaaaaaaaz!”

Pinkie ceased her cavorting and singing and smiled. “So whaddaya think?”

“Pretty damn good! But, I haven’t even done any fighting in Ponyville, so how did you know the stuff I do?” Some of it anyway.

“Lucky guess,” she shrugged. Pinkie bounced away joyously, humming something to herself.

“How-” Alcatraz began.

“Don’t ask. You just get used to it,” Spike cut him off. “So, you’re a superhero?”

“Hmm… I guess you could put it that way.”

The pair resumed their journey, which lasted a few more minutes. Upon reaching the building, Alcatraz opened the door and held it for Spike. After that he removed his helmet, stowing it under his arm.

“Thanks.”

“No problem, dude.”

Closing the door behind him, Alcatraz surveyed the room. Around him was an array of fancy attire, all perfectly arranged in a way that pleased the eye, even if the mind didn’t fully grasp the level of organization. Spike walked up to a counter and rang a bell.

“One minute please,” Rarity responded. Exactly a minute later, she pranced down the stairs. “Hello, Spike; Alcatraz, good to see you. You look different, did you do something with your mane?”

“Yes, I did actually. I’m here to ask if you could make something for me to wear, like a tuxedo. Bear in mind I’ll have to wear it over my Nanosuit, so making it fit may be an issue. Can you whip something up on such short notice?”

“I took the liberty of estimating your size the other day, and used the time you saved me with your idea to modify our old Gala wear to make you a tuxedo.” Rarity levitated a crisp black suit out from a rack containing several dresses, and over to Alcatraz, who grabbed it and carried it to a changing room, slipping his helmet back on to maintain situational awareness.

“Is there anything I can do to help, Rarity?” Spike asked longingly.

“Yes, as a matter of fact there is. I need your help sorting my gems by quality using your innate dragon abilities. I’ll let you have a few when we’re done,” She replied with a genuine smile.

Spike nodded eagerly, licking his scaly lips at the thought of the delicious treats awaiting him.

Meanwhile, in the surprisingly roomy changing room, Alcatraz was slipping into the black pants, which seemed to be made of the same durable silk as the rest of the ensemble from what a quick scan with his suit’s visor told him.

They fit quite well, just a little loose around the waist. Luckily, a belt had been provided for him, with a belt buckle featuring an eagle made of Argentium sterling silver; an alloy of silver containing a small percentage of copper and germanium to decrease tarnishing and add other useful properties. He looped the belt through the loops but left it unbuckled for the moment.

Next he donned the white button-down shirt provided for him, which fit quite well when he finished buttoning it. He tucked it into his pants and buckled his belt. Lastly, he put on his black coat and did his black bowtie. Looking in the mirror, he straightened out anything that was out of place and exited the changing room.

Why do they even need a changing room? It’s not like they wear anything they can take off. Maybe they’re all really hairless? Nah, probably just so the occupants of the room can have some space to try on clothes instead of awkwardly fumbling in front of other ponies.

Alcatraz removed his helmet once again, and Rarity turned from her gem sorting to see him in his new formal attire.

“Alcatraz, you look magnificent! I was hoping that the ensemble wouldn’t be ruined by your suit, and thankfully it isn’t. Just um, try to keep it tidy, would you?”

“Yes ma’am. I’ll take it off and carry it to my APC next to Twilight’s house. I’ll put it back on around 6 PM.”

He left and did exactly as he said he would, and stored his SCAR and Marshall too. He sat inside the library and read what he could about Equestria’s military. Strangely, he couldn’t find anything about the modern Equestrian armed forces.

At 6 PM, he put his formal wear back on, adjusting it in front of a mirror in the library. At 7, night fell and his transportation arrived outside. He found the others all dressed and ready to leave.

“We’re riding in a carriage?” Alcatraz queried, confused by the odd method of transportation.

“Of course we are, Alky! Just hop in,” Pinkie replied.

He stepped into the enclosed vehicle, shut the door and sat down. He felt the distinct sensation of taking off shortly after.

“What the hell?” He blurted. He looked out the window, and saw them traveling hundreds of feet above the ground. “Are we flying?”

“Uh, duh! We couldn’t have gotten there any other way this late at night. ‘Sides, it’ll only take an hour to get to the castle this way; if we took the trains it’d take longer, and you’d probably scare a lot of ponies,” Rainbow Dash told him.

“True enough. I was expecting a helicopter, but whatever.”

“What’s a helicopter?” Pinkie asked.

“I’ll tell you some other time. I’m gonna read.”
“How? You don’t have any books on you as far as I can tell.” Twilight this time.

Alcatraz put his helmet back on, and opened The Hunt for Red October to continue where he left off that morning. “I can store an entire library of books with this suit, and read them with the visor; I don’t need physical copies anymore as long as I have this suit.”

“Pfft. Egghead,” Dash muttered.

An hour passed, the ponies chatting and Alcatraz reading. They all quieted down when they felt the soft bump of landing on the grass. For the umpteenth time, Alcatraz removed his helmet.

A set of guards escorted them to the dining room, where a large table sat. The ponies and Alcatraz (who was provided a rather comfortable chair) took their seats around the table, and the princesses entered. Alcatraz watched as they sat beside each other at the head of the table. Three other ponies entered, one a white unicorn wearing a military dress uniform that reminded him of the guards outside Buckingham Palace, another white unicorn with a golden mane and bowtie, the other a pink “alicorn” wearing royal regalia.

Princess Celestia cleared her throat. “Thank you all for coming. We are here to welcome Lieutenant Theodore Alcatraz to our world and country, in hopes of showing goodwill toward his people, who as I understand will begin their arrival in eleven days. Lieutenant, you’ve met most of us, but the three you haven’t seen before are Prince Blueblood, Shining Armor, who is the captain of the Royal Guard, and his wife Princess mi Amore Cadenza.”

Alcatraz had no trouble deducting who was who, and understood the meaning of the Princess’ name.

Italian, interesting.

“Please, just call me Cadence,” Princess Cadence added, without a hint of the Italian accent Alcatraz expected.

A guard walked up to Celestia and whispered something into her ear. “I’m terribly sorry Lieutenant, but Princess Luna and I are needed elsewhere at the moment.”

“It’s no trouble, Your Majesty. Running a country is a full-time job,” He replied graciously.

The princesses left the room in a hurry, but the waiters arrived with menus almost as quickly. Alcatraz eyed what was available, and noticed a diverse selection of meat.

“Excuse me, but I’m under the impression that ponies are herbivores, yet there is a rather wide variety of meat available. Why?”

“We’re sorry if you’re offended, it’s just that not all our guests are herbivorous,” Princess Cadence explained.

“Actually, I’m not offended at all; humans are omnivorous.” Alcatraz looked at the menu, and up at the waiter. “I’ll have the 20 ounce strip steak. Medium rare, and leave the fat on. I’ll also take the rosemary olive oil bread, the whole loaf, and leave the butter on the side.”

The waiter nodded and left for the kitchen with his order. The others were making their orders, and one by one each of their waiters left for the kitchen.

“I have to say, I’m impressed with the luxury of this castle,” Alcatraz commented with a smile.

“I’m sure you are. Only the finest servants work in this castle.”

“I wouldn’t mind living here, though I doubt that even if I did I’d be here much anyway. In fact the ponies back in Ponyville seemed fairly friendly, despite their initial near-hysteria at the idea of an alien among them. I think I’d like moving from Scottsdale to somewhere in Equestria, just keep me up to date on my favorite video games and give me some tequila and I’ll be happy.”

“Wha’ in tarnation is ‘tequila’?” AJ asked.

“A distilled beverage made from the blue agave plant.”

“Never heard of it.”

“Me neither. Heck, I’m familiar with every plant outside of the Everfree, and I’ve never heard of it!” Twilight added.

I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.

“So, Lieutenant,” Shining Armor began.

“Yes?”

“What’s your country’s royal guard like?”

“If you mean the Secret Service, who protect the President of the United States of America, I wouldn’t be able to tell you much about that.”

“Then, what does your rank mean?” Shining was beginning to show visible confusion.

“It’s a military rank. I’m a Lieutenant in the United States Marine Corps’ Force Reconnaissance. Do you actually lack a military?”

“Well, yes. We haven’t had overt war in over a thousand years, since Princess Celestia came to power.”

“Hmm. And from what information I’ve gathered, you have the technology to make firearms, and I’ve personally seen models that mimic those from less than twenty years ago on my world. Tanks, helicopters and jets exist in other pony nations according to your version of the internet. Despite this, you possess nothing more than guards armed with spears, low velocity fight and ‘magic’.”

Once again, Rainbow Dash muttered the word “egghead”.

“With Princess Celestia’s power, we don’t need a modern military.”

Bullshit.

Princesses Celestia and Luna returned to the room and sat down just in time for dinner to be served. The meal itself was filled with generic and largely uninteresting chatter for the most part.

After the meal, the princesses brought Alcatraz and Shining Armor into a room with a large map as a centerpiece. The walls were lined with veteran guards, and a few ponies in civilian dress, whom Alcatraz suspected to be OGAs.

“I brought you here in part for diplomacy, but more so because you’re an expert on these aliens that have been antagonizing us recently,” Celestia stated.

“Correct. I’m familiar with their tactics and the different units they utilize, as well as their weaknesses. I can tell you that you won’t be able to simply incapacitate them, which would seem to fit your pacifistic nature.”

“Are you suggesting we kill sentient beings?” Celestia demanded.

“Yes.”

“Unacceptable.”

“Ma’am, you don’t have a choice if you want to eliminate this threat. The Ceph do not negotiate. They do not take prisoners. They unleash biological weapons on civilian populations without provocation.” Alcatraz began entering a command onto a display on his left palm. His helmet lit up and projected images of victims of the Manhattan Virus onto the wall, where they appeared in all their disgusting detail for the awestruck ponies to see.

“The Manhattan Virus was spread via airborne spores, and only in this form. The virus ate up tissue, causing cellular decomposition.” A short video of a victim’s face being eaten up using time-lapse photography looped. “The virus also turned certain cells into a fungus that grew using the degraded biomass as nutrients and covered affected areas of the victim’s body. Victims were given a conscious tendency to wander towards Ceph controlled areas to aid in their extermination.”

The ponies began to look sick as the fungus was shown on a body.

“Eventually their airways would become completely obstructed, and the victim would suffocate. After that, the virus died, and fungus finished melting down the corpse into this.” A pile of bones covered in a mass of solid colored pink-orange slime appeared on the wall. “They kill us, break us down, and reduce the environmental impact almost to zero. I don’t have any way currently to tell where or when the Ceph will attack. But if you help me, I can narrow it down.”

The ponies in the room considered their options. On one hoof they had their moral code, but the other seemed to contain their survival.

“Will your people fight alongside ours?”

“Yes. I can assure you of that. But we took heavy casualties when we fought them in Manhattan, and even if our numbers exceed ten thousand we will need more than just logistical support. Do you have a military infrastructure in place?”

“Our allies do. With their assistance, we can raise an army.”

“Not just an Army; you need a Navy, an Air Force, a Marine Corps. You need special forces to undertake dangerous missions. And most of all, you need to start now. Inform your country and your allies.”

Luna looked skeptical. “What prevents them from merely thinking us mad?”

“I have to agree with Princess Luna,” Shining Armor agreed. “What could we possibly provide them with to get their help?”

Alcatraz smiled. “Evidence.”

***

Three days later, Alcatraz was driving his VL-90 APC in the Ponyville area with Shining Armor and three other Royal Guards in the passenger compartment. He’d left a significant portion of his collected firearms and ammunition at Twilight’s house, just in case the APC got trashed.

He’d provided weapons and they guards had acquired their own uniforms and armor. To Alcatraz’ pleasant surprise, their uniforms were the same Woodland MARPAT that the Marines used, and their ballistic vests likewise a parallel in color and form. They’d painted their faces and bodies with matching colors at his behest, in order to subdue the bright colors of their coats.

He’d repainted the weapons to match their uniforms and trained them in the use and maintenance of firearms. To their credit, they were quick learners and showed a knack for military operations, at least in the rigorous practice sessions. Of course, there was only so much training one could go through; at a certain point training had to transition to reality, which would be the real decider of whether they were ready.

They could hear the sloshing of the water in Froggy Bottom Bog through the vehicle’s hull, which took in some water to power the hydrogen engine. Alcatraz liked the idea that this vehicle could literally be fed water to power it, just like the Warthog in Halo.

I wonder if they got the idea from Halo? Maybe Halo’s having an effect on technological development like Star Trek did.

“Seismic activity detected in close proximity. Possible Ceph presence.”

A waypoint appeared on Alcatraz’ HUD, indicating an area four hundred meters northwest. The route was obstructed by thick trees, precluding any further use of the APC. Alcatraz moved from the driver’s seat into the passenger compartment.

“Alright, here’s our stop boys! We’re hiking a bit less than half a klick northwest of here. Stay behind me and keep your eyes peeled; fucking squids could pop out at any time.” Alcatraz opened a side door, and the team piled out.

For this mission, Alcatraz had left his lighter previous loadout at Twilight’s house with much of his other weapons. This time he was carrying his Marshall shotgun, a Mk 60 Mod 0 with a reflex sight and laser sight, and a Majestic revolver. He pulled out his Mk 60 and flicked it from safe to automatic. He didn’t want to be caught off guard if he could help it.

They waded through the bog, met a steep hill obstructing their passage, and entered a small tunnel. Inside the tunnel, the unicorns lit their horns up to illuminate the area, revealing ancient inscriptions on the walls.

“What do they say?” Alcatraz asked. “Any linguists here?”

A blue unicorn wielding a Feline submachinegun raised his hoof, and Alcatraz nodded acknowledgement. “‘Turn back now. Beyond this point there are influences which baffle and frighten. The birds do not sing, the trees sway without wind, the grass is brittle and grey. A town built on this land was stricken by madness in the third year of its existence. The land ahead is cursed by forces so ancient that no pony can comprehend them. Leave.’ That’s all it says, the word after ‘leave’ stops halfway through.”

“Thank you Sergeant,” Shining Armor said to him. “Sounds messed up. You sure we should go on?”

“Positive. I can explain these phenomena somewhat. Before the Ceph revealed themselves on Earth, there were countless places that exhibited similar traits to where we’re about to go through. Animals avoided the areas completely, and humans claimed to feel uneasy in these places. Some of them were radioactive, some of them linked to ancient mythologies that seemed almost real to brave explorers. Unlike how most aliens were expected to invade from space, the Ceph waited underground for millions of years after having traveled from another galaxy. That’s why seismic activity telegraphs their presence; they come from below.”

“How will we know if the area is radioactive?” Shining asked, visibly concerned.

“My suit has a Geiger counter that’ll tell me. If it starts ticking, I’ll have you fall back here. Until that happens, make sure your gun and shoulder cameras are on, alright? We’re here for solid evidence that Ceph exist, so that we can get Equestria help from its allies. We bring back videos of them, tissue samples, and maybe some technology too.”

They proceeded through the tunnel, stepping over skeletons of ponies, and occasionally on them. The walls seemed to bulge inwards as they proceeded, and the tunnel wound in such a way that the trip took twice as long as it should’ve.

When they reached the end, Alcatraz motioned for them to stop. One of the ponies continued anyway, prompting Alcatraz to pull the pony back by his mane.

“Sorry.”

“It’s fine, but don’t let it happen again. Stay here, I’ll take a quick peek outside.” The ponies gaped, impressed that a being without magic became completely invisible in front of them. “I’ll only be a minute or two, and I’ll stay on your radios. Contact me if you need anything,” He said over their radios.

Alcatraz exited the cave, and heard the welcome sound of his Nanosuit’s advice

“Recommend tactical assessment.”

He moved to a ledge, staying low, and peeked over it. On the other side, twenty-five meters in front of and five below him, was a group of eleven Ceph grunts and a Ceph grunt commander. They were standing in a small but fortified CELL camp that was littered with the bodies of its former tenants, with a destroyed HMLTV in the center. There was plenty of cover for the Ceph to use, but like always, they seemed to wander near explosive barrels, oblivious to their hazardous nature.

Alcatraz tagged the dozen of them and returned to the alcove where his team was waiting. He decloaked and began to speak.

“Alright, just outside of this little cave is a ledge overlooking an enemy camp. A dozen of them down there; eleven grunts and one commander. There’s plenty of cover for them, but there’s also some red barrels filled with fuel we can shoot to put the hurt on ‘em. Follow me, stay low, and hold your fire until I say so. Are your cameras still on?” The ponies all nodded.

The five of them crawled out of the cave, and moved to the ledge overlooking the camp. Alcatraz switched to his Mk 60. At his sides, the ponies all aimed down their sights and flicked their safeties off. For several minutes they watched the aliens go about patrolling the camp.

“Aim,” Alcatraz whispered. “Open fire.”

The five of them began shooting. One of the ponies fired a grenade at the grunt standing by a fuel tank, injuring it and exploding the barrel, which practically obliterated the alien and left its exoskeleton completely empty save for a few small puddles of pink gore.

Alcatraz began firing bursts at the commander, wearing down its shields bit by bit. The Ceph returned fire, focusing on Alcatraz but killing the pony who’d translated the inscriptions earlier. Shining Armor’s face was splashed with his comrade’s blood, stunning him. The other ponies ceased fire as well, having never seen a pony killed in their entire lives.

Alcatraz continued firing at the now more aggressive Ceph, now trying to suppress them on his own. “What the fuck are you doing!? Keep firing or we’re all dead!” He threw a frag grenade at an advancing lance of grunts, killing three. Then he continued firing on where he thought the commander was. He hit nothing but dirt.

The commander was right behind him. The ponies opened fire on it and Alcatraz activated his suit's maximum armor; his suit muscles increased in density and absorbed the crushing melee of the commander, glowing faintly blue as they did so.

“Watch your fire!” He shouted. Alcatraz smacked the alien with the butt of his machinegun, stunning it long enough for him to unload a prolonged burst into its chest. He fired until chunks of guts flew out of the Ceph’s back. Then he kicked the body off of the ledge and got up to a crouch. The ponies had regained their composure somewhat, and resumed firing on the seven remaining defenders.

Alcatraz reloaded his now empty machinegun, which took precious seconds to do. After that he leapt down into the camp and engaged the remaining Ceph in close combat. He grabbed one by the “throat” and used it as a living shield against its teammates weapons. Pink ooze splattered all over him, some of it getting on his visor. He returned fire with the Mk 60 in his other hand, mowing down three more grunts.

A Ceph equivalent of a squad must’ve returned from patrol, because three stalkers and a stalker commander joined the fray, bringing the enemies' number back up to seven. Alcatraz dropped the body he’d been shielding himself with and sprayed the three stalkers with a lethal amount of fire, killing them and splattering their innards over the ground.

He did likewise with the three grunts, and looked around for the stalker commander he’d seen earlier. He was pounced by it, and it drove its blades into the weapon, rendering it useless.

It was my last mag anyway.

Alcatraz pushed it off and swung the weapon downwards with enormous force, aiming to kill the alien. Instead, he broke the now-useless weapon in half. He drew his Majestic and kicked the creature in the torso, sending it flying backwards. It had an excellent sense of balance, or perhaps gyroscopes, because it turned its flailing flight into a backflip and charged at him, firing its wrist-mounted weapons.

Alcatraz activated armor mode once again, and walked towards the stampeding alien. Time seemed to slow down as he began firing .50 caliber rounds into his foe. The first shot tore off its robotic left arm, the next removing its mechanical right leg below the knee. Alcatraz blew its other arm and leg off, leaving it helpless. He reloaded, holstered his weapon, grabbed the alien and carried it up to where his team was.

The ponies were deeply shaken at the violence they’d experienced, and the death of a friend. They carried his body back to the APC in silence, resting him inside it and closing his eyes. The ponies stared in contempt at their captive as they rode back to Ponyville.

***

Four days later, in Canterlot, Alcatraz walked into the meeting between Equestria and her allies and sat down. He wore no formal wear like the last time he’d been there; merely his Nanosuit. He opted to remove his helmet and show these leaders his face. He drew scant attention compared to the recordings from the ponies’ gun cameras, which depicted the violence the aliens fought with.

“How are we supposed to counter such vicious creatures? Even together, we have little ability to do this unless Equestria raises its own military! You have enormous wealth, resources and population, and extremely loyal and patriotic citizens.” A griffin delegate said. He turned his gaze to the captive Ceph, which floated in a transparent aquarium, and returned his hostile gaze before sucking a small fish into its normally imperceptible mouth.

“That is exactly our plan,” Princess Celestia replied. “I’m sure you’re all aware of the three coup attempts the Elements of Harmony have stopped. Lieutenant Alcatraz pointed out that their effectiveness requires all six of them, meaning if one were incapacitated, the other five would be useless. Additionally, we cannot risk their lives every time a crisis arises, especially ones they can scarcely resolve themseves. Although I loathe admitting it, it seems that force may sometimes be the best answer, and this is one such time.”

The room’s occupants were visibly astonished by her admission. Alcatraz took this to imply that she had an international reputation for pacifism and peace.

“Equestria needs your help to raise a full-fledged military, and quickly. Within four days, several thousand of Lieutenant Alcatraz’ fellow comrades will arrive.”

“What is this human’s tale?” A unicorn with a strong German accent inquired.

“I was sent in advance of a United States Marine Corps task force through a Ceph portal ten days ago to explore the area after a large contingent of the aliens fled through it, although I didn’t expect to find multiple sentient races here, and an existing satellite network. Many of these men and women have fought the Ceph before, making them especially suited to aid in your war.”

“So we can expect meager help from some puny nation composed of weak aliens to fight an extraterrestrial juggernaut?” The griffin asked, not satisfied.

“Wrong. The United States of America is the strongest, most prosperous, most technologically advanced nation on Earth, and a symbol of democracy and righteousness in the world, despite its many flaws. I am a patriot, and so are the rest of the people who make up our massive military, which is by far the best on our planet. The Marine Corps is an elite fighting force numbering two hundred thousand active and forty thousand reservists. A task force of several thousand Marines is nothing to scoff at.”

“Forgive me if I offended you.”

“It’s fine, I hear anti-Americanism on /b/ all the time. Now, even with all that said, the Corps won’t be able to fight this war on its own if the Ceph are half as numerous on this planet as I think they are. We can provide assistance, advice, and fight alongside you or independently as needed. This’ll have to be a team effort.”

“If you’re merely a lieutenant, how are you able to speak for your country in such negotiations as this?”

“I was semi-jokingly given authorization to try and form alliances with any potential allies by Colonel Sherman Barclay, who commands the coming task force. He said I could be the ‘Shepard to his Anderson’”

“Perhaps thou could tell us about thine experiences and thine history with the Ceph?” Princess Luna suggested.

“Well, a lot of my combat prowess is granted to me by this suit. Because of it, I survived wounds that should’ve killed me. Multiple lunge punctures, extensive pulmonary bruising, damage to the vertebrae and sternum, multiple broken ribs and a flail chest segment. When it was given to me by its previous wearer, who was dying, it saved my life by growing into the wounds. I can’t remove the suit because it’s part of me. All of those wounds were inflicted by a Ceph gunship that killed my squad…”

Alcatraz proceeded to recount his fight through Manhattan in depth for the delegates. As he did when he told Twilight Sparkle, he spared no gory details, to the revulsion of his audience.

In light of the revelations presented at the meeting, Equestria’s allies formally inducted it into NETO, and agreed to help it raise an army.

Author's Note

FUN FACTS
*In the official Crysis canon, K-Volts were reportedly used on mass protests in Syria.
*I used to lurk on /b/, and I still visit occasionally.
*If you get on my horse I'll take you to the universe, and all of the other places too.
*There is no truth to the rumor that Candlejack kidnaps people who s-