Paul McGann's Horse Friends

Frobisher stared at the crushed corpse in front him still puzzled on how this happened. "So" he sated looking into the cross eyes of the incidents witness "Who was guy?"

"The Doctor" The Grey mare said proudly.

"Doctor... Who?" Frobisher questioned... "Shit!" Frobisher had realized what the time trading two had done.

After a few minutes of conversation between Frobisher and the mare he would now know as "Derpy"  The Doctor stumbled out of the the TARDIS hair wet with blood and Play Boy down pants. "Arr Shit There's dead horse all over my hands!" The Doctor shouted.

"Well done!" Frobisher screamed "You fucking killed your self!"

"Frobisher... If I where to kill myself It would be a mass suicide with my cult that would end in me regenerating." The Doctor pointed out.

"I don't mean it like that!" Frobisher moaned, "This 'tard' just told me you crushed a guy called The Doctor who has a blue box which is bigger on the inside!"

"Yeah but there's one key fact your missing out..." The Doctor said.

"WHAT?!" Frobisher screamed.

"That bitch is a horse."

"Where in a fucking parallel dimension you cunt! Everyone's a fucking horse! For all I know I'm that cross-eyed cunt over there!" Frobisher yelled. "Now come on this Derpy bitch said something was up with the horse doctors TARDIS and that could be what's keeping us locked in this dimension."

"It's not nice to call people derpy Frobisher." The Doctor expressed his hatred of that word.

"That's her name you bitch brain." Frobisher explained.

The trio headed towards the location of the "horse Doctors" TARDIS lead by Derpy. Once the three entered the scaled down TARDIS exterior Derpy recalled the conversation her and the "horse Doctor" had about the broken state of the TARDIS.

"The Doc said it must've been Nigerian hacked," She remembered. "He said after he caused all poverty in Africa all African nations were after him... He assumed he was under an African attack anyway his main reason being his twitch account was recently hacked by notorious Nigerian activist 'RobloxGamer2007'

  "Seems a pretty legit theory" the doctor said nodding "in our universe 'roblox gamer' has purposely converted North Korea's party pillars into weapons of mass destruction."

It was then spooky voice came out of the TARDIS speakers "N'yes it was me The Master all along!"

"Arr shit" The Doctor and Frobisher said in unison.

"What the fuck do you want?" Frobisher questioned

"I just wanted to say what's up my dudes?! N'yes!" The Master said in a sincere yet sinister tone.

"We all know you've done something CUNT!" The Doctor responded angrily.

"Well... N'yes. I need... A favor n'yes." The master continued in his sincere tone "Since the the time lords banished me to some random basement n'yes I have been unable to indulge in my fetishes so I payed a Nigerian prince to bring desert your TARDIS on this horse world  where  if you want to escape you will have to indulge in sex that involves all my fetishes each with a different horse n'yes.

"Fuck no you creepy bitch brain!" The Doctor responded with disgust and discomfort.

"Then you will never return from horse world n'yes." The master responded with sympathy.

Derpy screeched like a social person about to be next in line to order a meal from the chipo man before screaming "FUCKING HELL MASTER JUST GIVING HIM THE FUNKING LIST YOU RETARDED PIECE OF SHIT CUNT!"

The Doctor and Frobisher were frozen in disbelief at they're companions outburst.

The master responded to Derpys attack by simply saying "n'yes here it is n'yes the instructions are on the back n'yes." The master left the conversation and with that a tablet engraved with Galifryan markings came out of the TARDIS.

Neglecting to comment on Derpys outburst The Doctor took the device examining it, the device read...

Diapers.

WaterSports.

Pregnancy.

FoalCon. (Sex with a underage horse.)

Incest.

Rape.

Scat.

After reading each fetish The Doctor became more, and more, disturbed shown in his wincing expression

"What's up Doc?" Frobisher asked.

"Don't send me things about incest! I don't like incest! Cunt!" The Doctor stated to seemingly no one."

"Wait how in the name of the Blue Meanie are you going to do incest?" Derpy asked.

"I have no fucking clue." The Doctor responded. "All I know are the instructions on the reverse side have told me...

Once you The Doctor have completed a sexual act involving one of the seven fetishes of sin it will be removed from the list. Once the list is blank the TARDIS will be able to travel.

"Where do we start?!" Frobisher asked in annoyance of the task the partnership were set.

"Well... Diapers, piss and so called FoalCon I may know a certain pantie pissing, underage, orange horse who can help us out!" The Doctor said with confidence and a smile on his face.

"Where do you have diapers Doc'?" Derpy asked tilting her head to Side as her eyes began to cross further.

"Do you have horse 7/11's?" The Doctor responded with another question.

"Yeah?" Derpy responded unsure of why The Doctor asked.

"Well let's get some 'slushies' and training panties boys!" The Doctor shouted with glee attempting to boost morale on his tedious task.

"Wait Depy..." Frobisher asked "Why are you doing this with us?"

"It's either this or the special center..." Depy responded "Plus you guys are pretty awesome!"

"Well come on then!" The Doctors said with the taste of adventure all be it a wired one in his tone. "We gotta fuck horse while its pissing it's pants! It sounds wired... But you never know til you try."

And with the that the squad headed towards 7/11.