You are anon or as everyone in the grand city of ponyvile calls you 'uncle '. No no, you are not blood related to any of them its just that you've been around so long every pony has taken to thinking of you as family. And it only took around 50 years.

Oh yeah did I forget that you're immortal.

And plausibly a sociopath. Oh don't worry you're not the only one, behind the scenes even sun butts been up to some twisted shit for her own amusement.

Maybe insanity just came with immortality?.

Either way long story short you're locked in a game of four dimensional chess with a mad mare who's played the game a million times. One slip up and you can kiss your dreams of conquering it all goodbye.

No pressure