Serious Sam - My Little Encounter

The castle was not empty. As expected, there were many monsters patrolling it. There was an adult arachnoid standing in front of the main gate, two pumpkin heads in front of the stairs and a couple timberwolves walking around. But most of all, there was a rocket launcher. That’s what Sam was the most interested in. The only thing between him and Twilight, and that rocket launcher was the rope bridge leading to it. Sam stepped onto it without much thought, but then he stopped.

“Uh, Twilight,” he said, “could you get me that rocket launcher over there, while I get rid of these fuckers?”

Twilight took a look at the bridge. “What do you mean? There’s nobody on it.”

“Oh just watch.” He then took a few more steps. And surely enough a kamikaze appeared in front of him and kleer skeleton behind him. “See? Now go!”

“Are you sure you don’t need any help?”

“What I need,” Sam shouted as he shot down the kamikaze and had the skeleton in a headlock, while new ones have spawned in their places, “is a goddamn rocket launcher!”

“Alright, alright!”

Twilight then flew above the castle entrance. The arachnoid let out a blood curling scream, as it spotted her and began shooting with its chain gun. Twilight blocked all of the bullets with a magical shield. When the arachnoid stopped shooting for a second, Twilight flew down to the rocket launcher. The arachnoid fired once more, which Twilight blocked with a shield again. The pumpkin heads ran up to her and slashed with their chainsaws. Thankfully, they were too stupid to get around the shield, so instead their saws just pressed against the shield, which made a loud metallic screaming noise. The timberwolves however, were intelligent enough to get around the shield and soon Twilight was about to get bitten.

As the wolves leapt towards her, she released the shield with a perfect timing and the two chainsaws got lodged inside two timberwolves’ heads. The arachnoid had a clear shot on her, which it planned on taking advantage of. But Twilight put a small shield around its gun, rendering it useless. She took the opportunity and grabbed the rocket launcher and flew away. Sam has already finished with the bridge.

“Here it comes, Sam!” Twilight shouted as she dropped the gun at him.

He grabbed it and with three rockets, blew up the wolves and the pumpkin heads running towards him. Only the arachnoid was left, but not for long. It had no chance to avoid the four rockets heading its way. After four explosions, it laid down in a pool of blood.

The entrance was finally clear. A yelp from Discord could be heard from inside the castle. Sam took his time, but Twilight ran right up to the entrance and opened the doors. That was a mistake. Four unusually large gnaars were waiting inside. They all ran up to the door and punched Twilight, which sent her flying down the stairs. Sam looked at Twilight flying past him and roll on the ground, then at the four enraged gnaars bursting through the open door. He launched a rocket towards them, but that wasn’t enough. With another punch, he was sent downstairs too.

Twilight then got up and fired a continuous laser towards one of the gnaars. It shielded its face with its arm and walked slowly towards Twilight. Meanwhile, another one lunged at her and put its massive hand around her head. She charged up her horn and blew the gnaar’s hand into pieces.

At the same time Sam was also dealing with his own two gnaars. He grabbed his chainsaw and shredded one of the fists flying towards him. The other one prepared to attack, but Sam ducked under its swinging hand and punched it through the eye, with the knife in his hand.

Twilight finished off one of the gnaar with the blown up hand, by grabbing it with her magic and smashing it into the other one-handed gnaar on Sam’s side and sent both down the ravine next to the castle. She noticed the other one running at her, but Sam stepped in and shoved his chainsaw into the top of the gnaar’s mouth, which came out through the top of its head. Sam then pulled the chainsaw out, tearing the gnaar's face into two.

“Lay off the steroids asshole!” He yelled at the mutilated corpse, then looked at Twilight, who was shaking blood off her face. “You okay there?”

“Yes, now let’s get Discord.”

They went through the main entrance. The hallway was brightly illuminated by the bright blue sphere on top of the stairs. It was Discord, who was surrounded by the ball of electricity, which was fed by two tall pylons by the side.

“Discord!” Twilight cried out and ran towards him.

“He’s ours!” An old woman’s voice could be heard from the side.

“Can’t escape from Mental’s embrace!” Said another one.

Soon, hunched over old witches emerged from the shadows, carrying large bubbling cauldrons as they levitated in the air. They looked as comical as they were grotesque. They settled down, then thrown magical skulls at Twilight. Sam gunned them down, but more broke through the windows, using old brooms to fly. They were cackling maniacally as they flew erratically, bouncing off walls and pillars and were throwing magical projectiles.

“I’ll take care of them,” said Sam to Twilight, “you get Discord!”

Twilight flew up to Discord and attempted to get close to him.

“Discord, we’re here!” She said.

“You’re too late!” Discord replied. “They already... got me!” He said while writhing in pain.

“I’m sure we can do something!” Twilight said, then looked around and saw the pylons. “I know, the pylons.”

She tried to destroy one of them with a laser beam, but the pylon didn’t even shake. She tried to cast a spell on Discord’s magical chains, but it just shocked her through the horn. Sam saw what Twilight was attempting to do, so when there was a moment of nothing flying towards him, he shot two rockets at the pylon. But it just wouldn’t budge.

“It’s... no use!” Said Discord. “Just... kill me... so they can’t get to me!”

“No!” Twilight objected. “After all you’ve gone through, I can’t just let you die here!”

“But I... can’t take it anymore!”

“You’ve got to try, Discord!”

“I can’t!”

“Equestria needs you!”

“I can’t!”

Meanwhile, more buffed up gnaars came in through the door.

“You wanna hurry up a bit?!” Sam yelled out. “I can’t hold them up for much longer!”

“Do this for all the friends you’ve made.” Twilight continued. ”If not for me, if not for Equestria, then do it for Fluttershy!”

Discord grabbed onto the ground.

“We can’t let Mental take over, imagine what would happen to me, to Celestia, to everyone!”

Discord got on all fours.

“Imagine what would happen to Fluttershy!”

“I can’t...” Discord’s eyes opened wide, “...let that happen!”

He bursted out from his electric cage. Lightnings shot out in all directions, annihilating all witches and gnaars and magical pylons in the vicinity, in a bright flash of light. Discord laid on the ground, small blue sparks of electricity still bouncing off his fur.

“I knew you could do it, Discord!” Said Twilight as she walked up to him.

Discord rubbed his head and groaned as he got up.

“Ugh, what a miserable situation I’ve got myself into. Next time I’ll think twice before jumping in front of a magical beam.” He then noticed Sam walking up the stairs. “Who’s our new friend, by the way?”

“That’s Sam,” Twilight introduced him to Discord, “we wouldn’t be here without him.”

“Discord, I presume.” Said Sam.

“You presumed correctly, good sir! Say, have we met before?”

“You have?” Twilight asked in surprise.

“I uh...” Sam replied “I’m pretty sure I’d remember someone like you.”

Discord just laughed, then snapped his fingers and they were back in Ponyville. “Who missed me?!” He exclaimed loudly.

“You’re okay!” Fluttershy ran up to him and hugged him.

“Oh, we thought you were gone!” Said Rarity to Twilight.

“Pff, it was nothing,” said Sam, “you should have seen her destroy those gnaars!”

“I’m guessing the princess of friendship did fight on the battlefield, after all.” Said Starlight with a grin.

“No time for celebration,” Rainbow flew in very anxiously, “the next wave has almost arrived. And it’s way bigger than any of the ones before!”

“They know I’m here,” said Sam, “they’re kicking it up.”

Upon hearing all that, Twilight got filled with determination. “Ponies!” She ordered. “Prepare for battle! We can’t back down now!”

“Absolutely!” Said Starlight enthusiastically. “Now that we have Sam and Discord with us, we’re sure to kick their butts!”

“Kick their asses, you mean.” Sam interjected, after picking up a tommygun.

“Pinkie,” said Twilight, “how powerful is your party cannon?”

“It’s pretty powerful!” She said proudly.

“Good, because we’re going to need it.” She turned to Applejack. “Applejack, gather up the family and everything you can use as a weapon.”

“Sure thing, Twilight!” Applejack answered.

“Fluttershy, gather up any help the animals can give us.”

“Way ahead of you, Twilight!” Fluttershy responded with enthusiasm.

“Discord, inconvenience the enemy as much as you can. Don’t let them put a single claw on anyone.”

“Oh, you know me well.” Discord joked.

“Rarity, turn anything you can into a weapon.”

“Hmm, I do have a couple ideas.” Rarity pondered.

“Rainbow, don’t let anything in the air touch the ground.”

“Alright!” Rainbow shouted and punched the air.

“Spike, unleash the dragon you are and prepare your lungs.”

“I’ll incinerate them!” Spike puffed up his chest.

“Starlight, utilize every offensive and defensive spell you can.”

“You’re really getting the hang of this, aren’t you?” Said Starlight with an impressed grin.

“The future of Equestria is at stake here, I have to.”

The earth began to tremble, the sound of the approaching army filled the air.

“Citizens of Ponyville,” Twilight shouted, “grab your armour, grab your weapons! Don't let these monstrosities take away your homes!”

Everyone got into position. Newfound courage appeared on everyone’s faces. The citizens held their spears steadily, the defence gathered, everypony grabbed whatever they could and prepared for battle. Sam prepared his weapons, Spike readied his breath, Discord rolled up his non-existent sleeves. Fighting spirit filled the air.

“Everypony ready?”

The town cheered.

“Alright ponies, it’s time to get serious!”