An Archaeologist In Equestria

"Aw crap..." I said, feeling around my satchel.

"What is it, buddy?" Rainbow asked.

"Where in the name of hell is my wallet?!" I say, frantically feeling around my satchel.

"You mean this wallet!" Pinkie says, scaring the hell out of me while also holding my wallet.

"Pinkie! Thank God, where'd you find that?" I say, taking my wallet, thanking Pinkie and putting it back in my pocket.

"I found it in the Everfree Forest while you were talking with Princess Celestia." Pinkie says randomly. Seriously, this pony is a hazard to my sanity.

"Girls, if you don't mind, I'd like to take Chase back to the Friendship Castle and interview him about his species and their history." Twilight says, and my friends all nod in agreement, as they all probably had things to do.

A few hours later, I sat down in a library with Twilight. The castle itself was made of crystal, crystal that was unlike anything I've ever seen. And it was amazing.

"So, where do we begin?" I asked.

Twilight sat down and pondered for a moment, the environment around us shrouded in perpetual silence. Then she spoke. "Why don't we start with you?"

"I have no problems with that." I say.

"My name is Chase Andrew Vander Dussen. My middle name, also my dad's name. I was born November 15th, 1997 at Hoag Hospital in Tustin, and I am now twenty years old. I live in Anaheim, California of the United States of America. The southern part to be exact."

"I think I heard you talk under your breath about your parents. What do they do for a living?" Twilight asked me.

"My Dad works for a company started by Thomas Edison, inventor of the lightbulb, called General Electric. He works for the Healthcare branch. He's an engineer, and he does repair jobs for MRI scanners."

"MRI? What's that?" Twilight asks me.

"Oh, it stands for Magnetic Resonance Imaging. I won't go to much into detail, but I will say this much: are you familiar with X-ray scanners?"

"Yes," Twilight says. "our hospitals use them to find broken bones."

"It's like that, but much slower and scans your brain. I had one done on me when I was younger. I kept getting headaches and my parents had no idea what was wrong, and when the scan was done, they found nothing wrong."

"As for my mother, she is a professor of psychology and a part-time play therapist." I conclude.

"Now as for my species, before you ask, we still debate how we came to be."

An hour had passed and I told Twilight literally everything. I covered the history of the existence and extinction of the dinosaurs. I told her about both World Wars, every movie ever made, and a little bit of my family history, and I even told her about the moon landings, and our technological advances and whatnot. I also told her of my adventures. We were about to wrap it up when an official looking envelope hit me in the eye, which really hurt by the way, and landed on the table.

I stood over Twilight and looked at the letter, which read:

Dearest Twilight,

I have heard from mine sister of this, "visitor" of which thou speakest. He does sound like pleasant company, if what mine sister hath said is indeed true. I shalt very much like to meet him. Bring him to us at thine earliest convenience. We look forward to awaiting thy response.

Signed, Princess Luna; Princess of the Night.