Sometimes, it's nice just to be alone. A good walk around this strange town by myself is just what the doctor ordered.

A realization I made recently: this town is nice. When very few ponies are outside, at least. Seems like everyone wants to talk or something. Where I'm from nobody would just randomly talk to you; you'd think they're crazy. That got me to thinking. Why did people in my world just stop talking? It's almost like randomly talking could get you arrested. This whole social media thing that everyone got caught up in destroyed the way we talk. It's all online messages, fake emotions, and notifications. I remember just going somewhere and talking to someone.

…

I miss that. I thought as I sat down on a park bench looking a bit mopey and depressed.

…

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Need some help, pal?"

"You need something?"

…

Okay, I do draw the line at constant, unnecessary kindness for no goddamn reason. I wasn't on the verge of suicide.

"I'm okay," I told a group of these random concerning ponies. I just needed some time to think! I can't think if everyone here wants to talk to me. And they barely know me for God's sake. "Thanks for the concern, but I just need to think alone for a while."

"You sure?" one pony asked in the front.

Do they target newcomers and shower them with undeserved kindness? Hell, if these ponies knew the real me, they'd run off just like that.

Hey, now that's an idea. Maybe I could… no, no. Let's not cast any more suspicion on me.

"Yes," I told him. My problems aren't for public discussion. "Go about your daily business."

As they walked off, each their separate ways, I contemplated my existence here. I kept asking questions, hoping Tormentor or something would enter my subconscious.

Let's think about this. Hmm, well I've only so far managed to stall Nightmare Moon, although it is possible I was unsuccessful. Regardless, that, and teach those ponies one lesson which honestly, I should have let Twilight deal with that. But they were being annoying to her to be fair. Quite annoying. But what about some other aspects of my life here? Well, from the fan standpoint, I'm in the show, become one of their kind, invaded the timeline, and am currently residing with my favorite one of them. Some would say that's living the dream.

But why do I hate it here? Why do I have such a negative attitude all the time?

Enough thought. There must be something more important than just contemplating my existence here. Try to dwell on some positive thoughts.

All right. Well, there's the fact that I helped save… I began but was distracted by the earth shaking below me. What the hell's going on? I see a few ponies start to run off, followed by what I believe was the entire town's worth galloping at full speed. Whatever it was, it probably sounded threatening. I finally look to the left and see the source.

Cows. A whole lot of them. Headed right for the town.

Oh, this will be good. I can only imagine that it would be like a bull in a china shop. Although, you know what? Bulls are rather graceful in china shops. So, it will either be along the lines of a cow riot or the greatest cow ballet this world will have ever seen.

And here they come in 3…2…1…

"YEEHAW!" I heard a familiar voice shout to my left. "Move aside, Winona. Put 'em up, girl!"

Honestly, I should have expected this. But also, I really don't give a damn what happens during my time here. Let's watch this play out.

Looks like a bit of teamwork is going on. Winona on the left and Applejack on the right, closing the gap. Now Applejack just lassoed the leader. Hmm, how does she do that with her mouth? Hell, I couldn't lasso if I tried. Forget that, how does this world function without opposable thumbs? Baking, farming, and pretty much everything here would be easier with…

"Look out!" I heard someone yell from the town.

What? Oh shit! Curse me and my inability to focus, during one of my many daydreaming sessions. Of course they run my direction. It's the only way away from the town. I'd better move.

Or, you know, just sit there.

Fuck me! Move, damn it! I jump over the side of the bench and quickly gallop towards the creek. It's going to be close…

[SPLASH!] Into the creek, just in the nick of time.

I have got to stop putting myself in danger.

"Hooie! Now what was all that about?" Applejack asked curiously about this strange matter to which the cow mooed in reply.

Well, what did you expect? I thought. Not all of the animals here can…

"Oh my! Begging your pardon, Applejack, but Mooriella here saw one of those nasty snakes," the lead cow said back to which the rest started clamoring in agreement. "And it just gave us the willies, don'tcha know?"

…talk.

Sometimes, I forget that I've been suddenly implanted into a city full of talking, colorful equines by an omnipotent being whose sole purpose is to torture me. Who am I to say who or what can and can't talk? Also, how could a snake here be frightening? I'd expect it to get your mail or do your yard work. How can anything be scary here? It's essentially a world full of candy canes, gumdrops, and smiles for God's sake!

"I completely understand." Applejack told her. Well, I don't. "Just next time, try and stay clear of Ponyville."

"We certainly will, Applejack. So long, Winona!" that same lead cow replied, as they all walked off back from whence they came.

Now to get myself out of this creek and cleaned up, but it's proving to be tougher than I thought. I believe I've got my hooves stuck in the mud. Well, the back ones at least… "Come…on!" I grunt, trying to push myself out of this sludge. I look back and see that they haven't budged, then look back because something caught my eye. An orange hoof offered some help.

"Sorry about all that," she told me. "The least I can do is getcha outta there."

I chuckled and took her offer. One strong pull and out come my back hooves. I shake off the excess mud. "The least I could have done was to move out of the way sooner."

"I reckon, but what's important is that nopony got hurt," she told me.

"True," I told her, shaking the water off my coat. "But my wish for a risk-free day has just gone down the drain."

"You always find yerself in danger," she poked at me.

…

"You got me there."

She smiled at me, to which one came to my muzzle too. The ponies in the background chant louder. "Ap-ple-jack! Ap-ple-jack! Ap-ple-jack!"

"Go on. You have a crowd to please," I told her.

"These ponies always find a reason to celebrate."

"Tell me about it…"

…

Why do I find myself just admiring the scenery here? I could be doing something productive.

…

No. Whenever I try to be productive, nothing ever goes right. So, I'm just going to sit down and enjoy the day. I think, as a cool breeze softly flows by. I hear some birds chirping in the distance, not too loud; they're just quiet enough to be pleasant. The leaves brush against each other, their sound similar to applause. And for good reason, because today was a beautiful day.

I guess living at Fluttershy's cottage does have its perks…

I heard the door open. "Oh, there you are. I thought you'd be in your room." She told me.

I'd thought so too, but this was too good to pass on. "If it wasn't such an amazing day, then I probably would be."

She smiled then looked up at the sky, then back at me. "It is a really nice day."

I pat my hoof on the ground beside me, "We still have some time before we have to head back to city hall. We can talk for a bit."

She walks over slowly and sits next to me.

I still had no idea why we were going somewhere. "So, the reason we're going back out to town is…?"

"…To thank Applejack for saving the town from that stampede."

"That happened a week ago. Couldn't they have done it sooner? Like right after she saved them?"

"I guess so…"

I stopped my original train of thought momentarily. Perhaps they wanted this to be a special event? Why didn't they just thank her and reward her somehow? Well, she's a humble pony, she'd probably have no need for any reward.

"I guess it doesn't matter in the long run," I said out loud.

…

Silence.

Whatever was going to be said, nature stuck in with a whoosh of wind or crinkle of some leaves gliding in the air. I didn't want it to end, but I have to keep talking.

"I'm not a burden, am I?" I asked.

"Huh?"

"Am I a burden?"

"Why do you say that?" she asked somewhat in shock.

"Sometimes I feel that my pessimism and laziness are too much to handle." Oh great, one of my depressing monologues… "I feel that someone as kind as you would despise a pony like me," I say as I swat at a pebble. "And yet you still let me live here. I'm surprised I haven't driven you insane yet."

"I'm sorry that you feel that way, but it just isn't true," she told me.

"How so? Ever since I've been here I've been in the line of destruction and had you worried." I say with my head down.

"You help me more often than you worry me."

I slowly raised my head up.

She raised her hooves, giving examples of my positivity. "You help around the cottage. You help feed the animals. You spend your days helping me. I think that's pretty kind of you." She finished and put her hooves down.

A soft tap of her hoof hit mine.

"I guess when you put it that way, then…" I started as I looked at her, but she turned away. I could see a slight tinge of pink on her cheeks.

Goddamn it, why does your shyness have to be so adorable? Well, to be fair, I would have done the same if I was back home under the same circumstances.

"Then what…?" she said looking towards me again, the redness now gone.

"I…uh…" I began, putting my hoof under my chin, but I couldn't remember, "I totally forgot what I was going to say."

"Oh."

…

I kick another pebble.

…

You know, I just realized how much I suck at talking to people. Or ponies in this case.

"Why don't we head into town? It's probably time now." I ask.

"All right."

I can't wait to see what unfolds there, something's about to go down…

I hate crowds.

Okay, maybe that's a strong word. Fine, I strongly dislike crowds. Even ones with super happy, and occasionally apologetic ponies.

When is this damn thing going to start? Where's the mayor during this?

Instead Twilight walks on the stage, note cards at the ready. She shuffles them slightly and then greets the crowd. "Welcome, everypony!" as the crowd noise dies down. "Today we are here to honor a pony we can always count on to help in matters great and small. A pony whose contributions to—"

Rainbow popped out of nowhere to interrupt the speech. "Did you see Applejack's slick moves out there? What an athlete!" she says. Oh ho, for once her ego is pushed aside. Bravo, Rainbow, bravo. She continued her ramblings. "This week she's gonna help me with a new flying trick, and I know it's gonna be so awesome!" she said, her voice getting higher every word, and a cheek squish on the final word.

Part of me wanted to heckle something from the crowd, but I'll just shut up.

"Exactly. And…" Twilight began once her rant was over, and pushed her out of the way, to which Pinkie popped up in front of her, interrupting her again.

I'm getting a sense of déjà vu…

"This week, I get to run Sugarcube Corner for the first time."

"What does that have to do with Applejack?" Twilight asked her. Took the words right out of my mouth…

She thought about it for a second. "Oh! Applejack, one of the best bakers ever, is gonna help me."

She does make some damn good treats. She sent me an apple pie as a thank you to me for helping her and her friends out with that whole ticket fiasco. I don't know what she does to it, but it's amazing.

"Applejack makes everything great, so free samples for everypony!" to which the crowd cheered in compliance.

I could see Twilight getting increasingly frustrated with each interruption. She shoved Pinkie Pie out of the way and finished her speech. "O-kay, that's great," she started. "Now if I could just make a point without being inter—"

"Twilight?" a voice called out quietly.

"—rupted," Twilight said irritably. I don't know, I was finding this whole thing hilarious. It's all funny until it happens to you.

"Twilight, I'm so sorry," she began in true, apologetic Fluttershy fashion, "but I just wanted to mention that Applejack is also helping me this week with the bunny census, where we count up all the new baby bunnies that were born this season."

…

"She's gonna help gather them using her wonderful herding skills," she added.

…

Wait, why didn't I know of this? Why didn't she ask me for help?

"Anyone else? Anyone? No? Well then, as I was trying to say…" she started, trying to finish her own speech, but the mayor decided she would do that herself. Twilight groaned in exasperation and threw her note cards in the air: "Never mind!"

Being interrupted is pretty damn annoying, isn't it?

The mayor cleared her throat and addressed the crowd. "And so, without further ado, it is my privilege to give the Pony of Ponyville Award, to our beloved guest of honor, a pony of the utmost trustworthiness, reliability, and integrity. Ponyville's most capable and dependable friend…"

I would cue a drum roll here if I could…

"Applejack!"

The crowd went wild. Maybe a bit too wild, considering nobody appeared from behind any curtains or walked onto the stage. Soon enough, these ponies realized something was up.

Where the hell is…?

"I'm here! I'm here!" she said from the back, barging her way through the crowd, bumping into many of the other ponies. She made her way closer to the front, then bumped into me and apologized.

"Whoops, sorry 'bout that," she told me.

"It's ok," I said. Something's clearly off...

She walked on the stage, over to the podium, and shoved the mayor aside. "Thank you kindly for this here… award thingy," she said, yawned, and walked over to it. "It's so bright and shiny and…" she started chuckling, "I sure do look funny." She finished, to which her and Pinkie Pie had fun with their warped reflections.

Albeit confused, Twilight finished up the ceremonies. "Okay, well, thank you Applejack for saving us from that scary stampede, and always being there for everypony."

Applejack yawned again, before giving her closing remarks. "Yeah. I like helping the ponyfolks and stuff," she said as she yawned again, and then started to snore. She snapped out of it and took off with the trophy, rattling off a quick thank you before dragging it slowly across the ground… for an awkwardly long time.

…

Smooth, Applejack, smooth.

Every pony started to leave and go about their daily business, of course not wondering what the hell had just happened in the slightest. Then, Twilight asked the burning question: "Was it just me, or did Applejack seem a little…?"

"Tired?" Rainbow Dash remarked. Bingo. Give this mare a cookie.

"Dizzy?" Fluttershy added. I guess… close enough.

"Messy?" Rarity added.

…

"Well, did you see her mane?"

That's what happens when you work outside, Rarity…

"She seemed fine to me," Pinkie Pie said.

Everything's normal to you…

While Twilight was wondering what to do, I already had a plan figured out. So I gathered everyone to tell them.

I cleared my throat and started. "All right. I need you five to gather around." To which obedient footsteps followed my command.

"From what I've heard, you, you, and you are getting help from Applejack, correct?" I said pointing at Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie, to which they all nodded in compliance. I took a deep breath and told them this simple plan. "All right, I'm going to be taking over for Applejack."

A look of confused faces encircled me.

"Now, wait a minute," Rainbow Dash called out, "I need the help from an athlete, not just some regular pony. That's why I said I needed Applejack's help."

I don't know if that was a jab at my physique or just being ungrateful at a request for help. I wasn't about to take that from her, but I kept my mouth shut anyway. I took another deep breath and asked her what she needed to do.

"Before I fill the sky with expletives, what is it that you need Applejack's help with?"

She retold her plan in more detail to me. "I need her to climb up this ladder and jump onto one side of the platform, launching me up into the air, and then I'll do my tricks after I've received this extra boost of speed."

What the hell does that have anything to do with being an athlete? "You don't need an athlete to do that," I told her. Why the hell does she seem to hate me so much? Surely, I cannot have pissed her off that much. Then, I realized something. What do I care? I can't stand her anyway. Her ego is goddamn annoying. "You need a similar mass to do that, like me, albeit slightly more than her." And to put this sort of ego of hers to rest, I chimed in with: "And by the way, I was one of the fastest runners in my, er-class, back in my school days."

She wasn't springing for this idea. Until Twilight chimed in. "Zenith's right," she said. "Just take the help. We can't let Applejack do everything when she's clearly overworking herself."

She gave in. "Ugh! Fine."

Thank God… one down. "All right. Pinkie, what do you need?"

"Well, she was gonna help me run Sugarcube Corner by helping me bake some treats with me."

I laughed. "Well, you're in luck. I happen to be a decent baker myself."

"Really?" a couple of them wondered.

For further validation, I gave another example. "Back in my younger days, to when I was a sixth, er-colt, I managed to cook, bake, and serve for some of the others for some time." A couple of ooh's and ah's came from these intrigued ponies. "I may not be as good as Applejack, but I'm good enough in the kitchen to bake my way around."

"Sounds good to me!" Pinkie said eagerly.

"And you, Fluttershy, need some help gathering rabbits?"

"Well, bunnies, but yes."

Same thing. "I can easily help you out with that."

She remained silent.

"All right! It is settled. I shall help you three," I told them, then added: "And Twilight?"

"Yes?"

"I need you to stall Applejack for as long as possible. Make sure to keep her away from everyone."

"Ok."

"Rarity?" I asked towards her.

"Yes, darling?"

"Are you at all busy today?"

"Well, I was going to get some more supplies for my new collection, but this is a far more pressing issue. I'll go with Twilight and help however I can."

"If you wouldn't mind…"

"Of course not, darling."

"Fantastic. Thank you. And thank you Twilight."

"No problem."

"Of course."

As Twilight and Rarity trotted off to follow my given commands. I addressed the three others.

"Rainbow Dash, you're first," I told her. "I'll help you both after I help her."

They both nodded as Rainbow Dash and I headed towards the contraption.

"You sure you got it?" She told me.

It doesn't a genius to jump off something. I must have really pissed her off, I thought. "Yeah. Seems easy enough. Just give me a signal when you're set up properly."

…

Sheesh, not even a response…

"Ready?" she told me.

I acknowledged with a nod. I have been acting like a jackass towards her…

"1…"

But her ego. Her goddamn ego is so painfully unpleasant.

"2…"

You know what? I can't change it. Or can I…?

"3!"

Fuck it. I jumped right after I made that realization: Stop caring so much about other people, er-ponies. They are who they are. The wind flew through my mane and tail, and after what felt like an eternity, a sudden impact of wood slowed down my fall, transferring my energy to the other side of the lever, propelling a light blue pegasus into the sky. Her speed was unbelievable, unlike anything I've seen before. Her accuracy, talent, moves, and agility were incredible.

Maybe she is Wonderbolts material…

After a solid minute of pure, nonstop movement, she came back, barely breaking a sweat. "Not bad," she told herself.

…

She did all of that and she thought that was OK?

"Rainbow Dash," I started, "That was the most incredible set of skills that I've ever witnessed."

"Huh?"

"I have never seen such dexterity and adept flying skills until now."

"You… really think I'm that good?"

"Absolutely." It's one thing to see this in a cartoon, but to see this in this alternate reality? It's absolutely astounding.

"Thanks… I guess…" she said sheepishly while kicking some dirt. Where was that self-confidence she thrives on?

"Are you saying you could do better?" I asked her.

"Oh totally! If you thought that was amazing, then climb back up there and let me show you something else!"

There's that ego I know and… can tolerate at this instance because it's totally deserved. "Show me what you got."

Test after test just kept getting better and better. Longer duration, more intense tricks and spins, and an expert sense on the landing would impress anyone. I especially liked the fourth test as I told her to do a front flip off a house and through a set of cloud rings I made her place, which further proved her swiftness.

After she landed back in her spot, both of us running out of breath, she asked me about her performances. "How's that?"

I paused for a moment before unleashing the ultimate confidence booster.

"The Wonderbolts would be privileged to have you."

"You think so?" she asked me.

"If they are as good as you make them out to be, and with the skills I just witnessed today, you'll be there in no time," I told her.

I could see her trying to contain the excitement, to which she surprisingly didn't just explode. Now, for a bit of depressing stuff. Hopefully, not too much of a downer.

"Look, Rainbow Dash," I started, to which her expression changed to make my solemn countenance. "I think we got off on the wrong foot, er-hoofhere," I told her. Maybe I was a bit harsh on her the first time around, with all of this undivided anger towards her. "First impressions aren't my strong suit." Hell, is there anything that I am good at?

"Yeah," she said. "I guess so."

I sighed. I'm bigger than this. "I'm sorry. I've just been having trouble for a couple of years." Did I really just say that? Why am I venting to her? "Back in my homeland, my life just went downhill. But I won't vent too much. Long story short, I only saw the worst parts of you and judged you based on that. Every time you displeased me or, earlier today, denied my request for help, it just kept digging inside me."

…

"Sorry for venting. Just something I needed to get off my chest." I looked to my left and noticed a clock. Looks like it's time for me to help Pinkie Pie. "I guess I'd better go help Pinkie now," I told her as I headed towards Sugarcube Corner. I expected her to butt in with some egocentric comment, but she said nothing. Understandable. I've been nothing but impatient and brash, the same she's been to me. I can let this sink in for some more time.

I guess I'm more like her than I thought I was…

"Now Pinkie Pie, are you sure you're up for baking the muffins and running this store this afternoon?" Mrs. Cake asked concerningly. I would be a bit worried too if she was about to be put in charge. Brace yourselves, everyone…

Pinkie, being her ever-positive and spastic self, responded, "Yes-siree-bob, Mrs. Cake!" all while bouncing around. "Plus, I have my friend here to help me out. He says that he's an excellent baker. Why don't you tell them all about it?"

Way to put me on the spot, Pinkie. "Yeeaah," I dragged out. "I've been cooking and baking ever since I was young," I told them, but that won't convince anyone. Now it's time to lie. "Also, some of my desserts have received some high praise and accolades."

"Really?" Mr. Cake asked. "Then, I guess I feel little more at ease now. Because honestly," he stopped and took me aside. "I was a little concerned having her run the store herself."

"With her attitude and behavior, it could be cause for alarm," I told them. But I've got to vouch for her. "But also, some of the greatest thinkers in history seemed insane to others, but look at them now."

They still looked a bit worried. "Trust me. Pinkie is going to become one famous and amazing pony."

They smiled. "Okay," Mrs. Cake told me. "We'll see you both in a week!"

Pinkie and I both waved. "Have a ton of fun!" she told them excitedly.

"Have a good time," I told them, much less excitedly.

I sighed. Don't lose your cool.

"So, Pinkie," I started. "What are we making today?"

"Some delicious chocolate chip muffins!" she told me.

Phew, something easy, and almost impossible to screw up. I thought, but before I could even look up, she already had a bowl and her ingredients at the ready.

"All right! I've got the sugar and the eggs. Can you get the chocolate chips?"

Damn, she's fast, I'll give that to her. "Anything else?"

"Baking soda, flour and wheat germ."

Although I knocked over some spices, I was still able to get said ingredients. I hate these hooves. How the hell can she do it?

"Now that's gonna be delicious!" she exclaimed.

"I concur."

…

You know what?

"Pinkie," I asked. "Could I try something real quick?"

"Sure thing!"

"I might need your help."

"Oki doki loki!" she said following me into the kitchen.

As soon as I got set up, she and I teamed up to tackle my recipe. "All right," I began. "I need some flour, butter, and eggs." I was going to make something I have long been wanting for a while now. Something I always make whenever I want something sweet and delicious. Something that I knew I could make. "Then, I need some sugar, salt, and cinnamon." She obeyed my directions and got said ingredients in a jiffy. "Lastly, I need brown sugar, water, and some kitchen magic."

"I found everything but the magic, maybe you should ask someone…" she started.

"Don't worry," I told her. "Let's see if I've still got some of that left in me," I told myself.

I took a deep breath and took off. The dust and powder were in the air as I mixed the dry together. The mixing bowl whirring softly, crushing clumps of each ingredient to a fine powder. "Pinkie, set up that oven," I warned her beforehand. This timing needs to be perfect. Then, I added some liquids to the mix. This dough is starting to take form. It's working. But let's not get ahead of myself, I still need to finish this one out. As I turned off the mixer, I quickly started a new concoction. Stirring that into a nice paste, I brought it over and quickly set up a layer of flour and threw the dough onto the table and rolled into submission. I added this previous paste to the mix, making an even coating. I then rolled this rectangle up trapping it all inside. Now comes the tricky part, cutting these up equally. I found a slicer nearby, no use inevitably stabbing myself with those knives. I aimed with precision on the first one. Then, the second. Third. Fourth. Fifth. And so on until I had twelve equally sliced circles in front of me. I moved these onto a cooking sheet and faced the oven.

Any second now…

The oven made a small beep and I gave my order to Pinkie. "Now!"

She opened the oven and I charged at it, placing my recipe inside. I was finished.

"Phew!" I sighed after that ordeal. I leaned against a wall. I may take baking way too seriously. I just turned what Pinkie had made The Food Network into Hell's Kitchen.

"Is that it?" she looked at me somewhat concerned.

"Yes," I said. But wait… "Well, no. We still need an icing."

"What does that need?" Pinkie asked, hoping it wouldn't be another crazy runaround.

"Not much. Just some butter, sugar, milk, and vanilla."

"Like this?" she said holding the mixture in front of me.

I stood up, confused. "How did you…" The oven beeped again. Done already? These ovens must have some special properties with them. "Never mind. Drizzle this icing all over these." I told her.

"Wow!" she yelled. "Those smell soooooo good!"

I guess my reputation as a baker precedes me. "They'll be even better once you put that on."

We both watched as this slowly left the bowl and hit the delicious bread recipe. It covered each of the twelve tasty treats, solidifying a nice coating around each one. And now I'm getting pretty hungry just thinking about it. "Why don't we give our recipes a little…*ahem* taste test?"

"I'm way ahead of you, Zeni!"

I let her go first.It's make or break time. She took a bite. I saw her face go from perplexed to pure amazement. "I have never tasted anything that delicious in my life!"

"Really? Let me try that." I took a bite. Hmm. Cooked pretty well, sweet, tasty. It's all around good, but not anything special. "It's pretty good," I said, not wanting to brag about some decent treat.

"Are you kidding?" She started. "This is the best thing I have ever eaten in my entire life! I didn't know you were such an amazing baker Zeni!"

"What can I say? I try to keep a good reputation around ponies."

I looked down at my recipe, thought about something, then looked up and uttered my thoughts to the mare next to me. "Wanna get crazy?"

"I like the way you think."

"Every pony walking about, do you crave a delicious treat to satisfy that sweet tooth?" I started. "Do you want something delicious right now, free of charge? That's right, I said free of charge. Come get 'em while their hot! Muffins, pies, brownies, cookies, and more! Something new or something tried and true, come one, come all to this bakery extravaganza!" I said out loud to walking ponies.

Ponies stopped from their daily route to come try our samples. Ooohs and aahs for every baked item. Everything was flying off the shelves, Luckily, I had baked more of the popular ones in advance. I knew cookies and brownies would be big-ticket items.

"This is going super-duper well!" Pinkie told me.

"Tell me about it," I replied, boxing up a cake for someone, "These ponies sure do love some bakery treats." I paused and looked at this pony getting this cake and thanked him personally. "Thank you, sir," I said as I gave him his cake and he went on his way. "Oh, she's gonna love this!" he said excitedly as he walked out the door.

"Zeni," Pinkie told me from across the room. "You're smiling!"

I may not smile a lot when I am here, but right now, I have the biggest grin on my face. This is probably the happiest I've ever been. Making ponies joyous in this land that I was forced into. I guess it has its perks sometimes.

As soon as the bakery event ran its course, we spoke as we cleaned up the main floor. Pinkie told me to go and help Fluttershy, while she stayed back and cleaned up the kitchen. I wasn't exactly on board with that plan, but I did make a promise to Fluttershy. And I can't break a promise to her after what she did for me.

"You sure you have this taken care of while I? It's still a bit of a mess…" I asked her.

"Zeni, you did more than enough by helping me bake for everypony in town! Cleaning the kitchen will be easy-peasy!"

"All right. If you want to, you can." I told her and started to walk away. "It was my pleasure to bake alongside you."

"Me too! Catch you later, Zeni! See you around!"

I waved and walked away, to my next objective, Fluttershy and the rabbits, pleased to an even better extent than my training session with Rainbow Dash. Dare I say I had the time of my life. Pinkie Pie may be a bit loud and obnoxious, but she's tolerable to bake with. She's the second one here to make me smile. The first being Fluttershy. Whatever shy thing she does always manages to crack a small smile from me.

I did stay a little later than I anticipated at the bakery, but I don't think she'll mind. I'd still better hurry up.

Ponyville sure is an interesting place to walk around, when there's not the danger of a stampede of cows coming. I already knew all of these big buildings. The town hall, Sugarcube corner, and more. But the stuff that goes unnoticed in a usual 22-minute timeframe I find myself looking at right now. Maybe that's just me and my weird mind. I see a market to my left.Maybe I'll go and grab something for Fluttershy. It's a small favor, but anything that helps her out will repay her.

I swing open the door and I allow myself in. Hmm, a cute little market. Oats, hay, produce of many varieties, and other pony related things of the sort. I'll get a decent supply of food and head out. Now, where's a cart that I can load all… oh, fuck me, this isn't a goddamn supermarket on earth. Guess I'm just getting some carrots.

I look around the store for a couple minutes but can't find them. I thought I just saw the produce around somewhere. Lettuce, apples, flowers, no, not it, maybe I passed them…

"Excuse me," a voice calls from behind me, "I need to grab something from behind you."

I turn around and move out of the way of a magenta colored pony who then got her things. "Sorry," I quickly rattled off.

"That's all right," she told me, "I just needed to grab this for tomorrow," she said, displaying an apple momentarily and then putting it in her bag.

She looks familiar. Not like I'm able to recognize anyone in this town, but something about her was ringing a bell. I notice the cutie mark for a second. Three flowers with smiles in them. She's the… uh…

"Those fillies and colts can be quite a handful," she mentioned.

Nope, still blanking.

"But the looks on their face when I teach them all about this magical land makes it all worthwhile."

Ah, the teacher. But what the hell was her name? The hell with it. "Ah, you teach? Interesting." I started. "I've thought about doing something like that."

"Really?" she asked, "What would you teach?"

"Mathematics, probably. It was one of the few subjects that I excelled at. What do you teach?"

"Everything. I'm a schoolteacher over at the Ponyville Schoolhouse," she told me. "My name is Cheerilee."

Cheerilee. Right, I totally knew that.

"Good afternoon, Miss Cheerilee." I start, "I'm Zenith."

"A pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise."

…

"Do you think you'll pursue a teaching career?"

Here? Hell no. I need to get compensated for that. I can only imagine my reward for teaching the children is that I've learned with them or the precious memories I make or some bullshit like that. I'll humor her though. "I'd consider it." I shrugged and added. "I doubt I could find anywhere that would want me though."

"Oh." She said. "Why do you say that?"

I don't know why these ponies just let me vent to them whenever I want. "I don't know. There's always a better pers-er, pony for the job."

"I suppose so…" she started, but then asked, "but how far did you come along in math?"

"Calculus," I answered honestly, "But Algebra and Geometry were among my strongest."

A pause rang through the air. "Well, with that much knowledge, you'll have plenty of ponies wanting your expertise."

"Why do you say that?"

"Not many ponies here have a deep understanding of math of that caliber," she said.

"I certainly haven't met anyone like that yet," I said. Twilight would probably have an extensive knowledge of subjects like that.

"I'm sure somepony will need your help, as long as you get your name out there," she told me.

Hmm, could be an interesting way to pass the time until I get a ticket home. Maybe I should just teach until the end of time.

"Maybe," I said humbly. I'm wasting too much time. I need to hurry up and head to Fluttershy's cottage. "Sorry if I took up too much of your time."

"Oh," she started, "I'm in no rush." She paused for a moment and then inquired about my whereabouts. "Do you need to be somewhere?"

Yes, but I need her help for a second. "Kind of," I said, "I need to pick up something for my friend first." I turned around and looked through the whole store one more time. "But I can't seem to find what I need."

She smiled. "I can help."

"If you don't mind…"

"Maybe you'll have to drop by and give some of these fillies and colts some tips on mental math."

"I suppose I could. Are you sure they're not ready for theorems and series?"

One look shot down my idea of mind-bogglingly intelligent students.

"How about derivatives and graphing?"

She sighed. "I don't think these students could grasp math of that magnitude just yet, Zenith."

"All in good fun though," I told her. "Thanks for helping me find those carrots."

"Don't mention it. I know my way around that market."

"I do appreciate your help. Have a good day, Miss Cheerilee."

"You can just call me Cheerilee if you don't mind."

"All right. I'll see you around."

She waved and then went on her way. That was a rather pleasant conversation. I really prefer the student-teacher interaction. Master and apprentice. The wise and the learning. I've always respected most teachers and professors; they're rather underpaid for the shit they deal with. Then again, this town is full of ponies, so the children here are probably nice to their elders, but who knows?

I'm very late. I wonder if it's worth showing up to help at this point. Regardless, not going is not an option. I've pulled that card too many times in on Earth. Plus, these ponies are rather forgiving.

I feel the ground start to rumble slightly. I look to my left and see a few ponies start to run this way. Must be in a rush to get home. Something else catches my eye, a light blue pegasus and she yells something: "STAMPEDE!"

Not again. This time I'm staying out of the way. No danger for me. That first time was WAY too close. Thank God I dodged that.

Here they come…

…

Are you kidding me?

…

Rabbits? That's the stampede? It's an adorable march of hungry bunnies. A stampede should imply danger or destruction of some sort. Of course, gathering them will be harder. Those are some pesky, agile motherfuckers.

Or…

I grab the carrots as best as I can with my mouth and cock my head back. I have one shot at this. Here goes. I thrust my head forward and release the bag. Trajectory looks good. Distance seems fine. Carrots are now falling onto the ground and right in the middle of the street. Perfect.

The leader swoops in and nabs the biggest carrot, soon followed by the others fighting for more.

I did it. I'd pat myself on the back, but I'm pretty sure I'd break something.

I stand by the group of rabbits and wait for a familiar face to appear. Actually, there's two. A worried yellow one and a displeased orange one.

"I think I have them under control, Fluttershy," I said to her as she walked to me. "Although, I might have spoiled their appetite."

"Oh. That's ok," she said, her face still troubled.

I sighed. "I'm sorry I couldn't make it." I started. "I got caught up."

She ignored my statement and told me something. "Applejack wants to talk to you."

"I assume to thank me?" I said.

…

"You wanted to speak to me? I believe to…"

"How could ya?!"

…

"What?" I asked, confused.

"How could ya go behind my back?"

"Are you serious?"

"I made plans to help everyone out, and you go ahead and ruin it all!"

Ruined? "Excuse me? You're overworking yourself!"

"I did that whole orchard by myself," she told. Really? I did not think she could do it. "What's a few favors for friends gonna do to me?"

"A lot, if you keep tiring yourself out!"

"It ain't!"

"Bull. Shit." I heavily enunciated.

I think that's the first time I've cursed at a pony. One of the main characters at least.

"I still managed to help out Fluttershy, too!"

"Help? Don't give me that. THAT was helping?"

"Sure, it coulda gone better…"

"Ya think?" I said exasperatedly.

"All right," she backed up and dragged her hoof on the ground. "I've had enough of ya…"

"Hey, hey, hey!" Twilight intervened. "What's going on here?" as Rainbow Dash held Applejack back.

"Zenith here went over my back to help you gals out!"

"It's like I told you, you're tiring yourself out!"

"I wouldn't be so mad if you had—"

"Why can't you accept some help, you—"

"Enough!" Twilight yelled. She stopped to think about what to say. "Applejack, you did have a lot to do today."

…

"And Zenith, you could have asked Applejack."

…

"I think that we can agree that this is all just miscommunication. If we ask before we help, friends will be more inclined to assist."

…

"No."

"What?"

"No. You cannot blame this on me."

"I wasn't finished—"

"You were in on this. All of you were." I'm taking you all down with me.

"All of y'all were helping him?" Applejack asked.

…

Applejack wriggled free and walked away.

"Applejack…"

"No, I just… need some time to think for a bit."

"Applejack, I'm sorry…" Twilight tried.

"Leave me alone for a while," Applejack ordered.

Twilight hung her head and she walked off, while everyone else went their respective ways. Silence fell over the town. I was the only one in the middle of town. Night falls. A blanket of darkness covers this land. I look to my right. Half a carrot. So much for a productive day. I walk to a tree, lay down, and sigh.

What the hell have I done?

Author's Note

What did you think? Let me know! Sorry for the hiatus and delay and such. :(