Chapters My Little Convicts - Crime is Magic
Prologue - Heist of the Millennium
6 Months Before the return of Nightmare Moon
It was a cold December night in Canterlot that day. It was that time of the year again when they celebrated one of the most beloved holiday of the year, Heaths Warming eve. Foals were dashing through the snow, carols were sung and plans that were weeks in the making began to unfold. But beneath the castle dungeon, an entirely different plan was unfolding.
“Twilight are you sure this will work?” Came a voice in the dark hallways of the Canterlot Castle Dungeon.
“It will work Twinkleshine, learn to have a little more faith, it might get you somewhere.” Another voice answered.
The two trotted quietly until they stopped in front of a large oaken door. They checked their gear and put on their masks as they waited for their que.
“But… this is Celestia’s castle, it has th-”
“I know that this is her castle.” Twilight answered with a hint of anger at her tone. “I also know that their security measures are obsolete. Hell, I bet an army of bugs will be able to tear this place down if it had the chance.”
“But still-”
“Why did you take on this job?” Twilight asked.
“Because I want to earn some bits.” The doubtful mare answered.
“Do you know the risks?”
“Yes?”
“Then why did you come with us.”
“…”
“Answer me.”
“All right, fine I’m a bit tense okay, you win and I’m gonna shut u-.”
“I can’t blame you, I am a bit as well.” Twilight answered. She looked up at the ceiling and began to think about the ‘job’ she was about to do. If they pull this off, they’re going to be rich but they will never be able to go back to Equestria ever again. The stakes are high and so is the price.
The silence was broken when all of the sudden two quick sharp knocks and one hard knock came from the other side of the wall. Twilight stood up and gave three hard knocks. After a while the ponies on the other side opened the door which was the entrance to the dungeon.
“Everything’s ready Twi.” said a blue mare disguised as one of the palace maid. Celestia’s Hearths Warming party is at full swing and the good princess is already too drunk to speak straight.
“The cannisters are set, Bolt and her crew are ‘gliding’ by in the sky, and we have about thirty minutes before our train arrives.” Said another mare who was wearing the same disguise, she had a yellow coat and a light blue mane. She handed a detonator to Twilight and the two mares began took off their disguises and wore their gear. “Oh, and Comet Tail has taken the security room.”
“Moondancer are we set?” Twilight asked through her earpiece as she took the detonator with her magic.
“Yes, just give the signal and this entire city will go blind.” Moondancer answered as she took a sip from her coffee. She was outside the castle in a van filled with electronic equipment and is now waiting for the team leader to give the green light. “Fillies the heist of the millennium is a go; I repeat the heist is a go.”
“Twinkleshine, Lemon Hearts, Minuette and Moondancer.” Twilight called out.
“Yes Twilight?” her crew replied as they wore their heavy duty saddlebags and gas masks.
“Happy Hearths Warming.” She answered as she wore her own gas mask and pushed the big red button of the detonator.
Popping sounds that can be perceived as gunfire erupted along the halls of the castle. Green colored gas began to crawl through the hallways. The guests who were mostly nobility began to shriek and scream as the guards scrambled to get the situation under control, but within two minutes everyone was silent.
Meanwhile outside the city outside the castles gates fell into similar panic as the entire electric grid was shut down. Few of the ponies outside were aware of the attack that was currently underway in the castle, so they went ignored the lack of electricity, lighted up some candles and took to the streets to sing songs.
“Twilight the city’s power grid is shut down and the castles security cameras now under our control.” Moondancer talked through her earpiece as she took another sip of her coffee. “From what I see, we have about ten minutes before the authorities outside the castle get a hint at what we’re doing here.”
“Alright we’re in the server room.” Twilight shouted as they reached their destination.
They have the motherload standing before them. This heist was not about Gold or Bits, it was about data and the Canterlot server room had it all. It was a large archive that stored, state secrets, military documents, top secret weapon programs, lists of undercover agents overseas and other pieces of information that would catch them a pretty penny if sold to the right… organizations. All of these are stored in fifty advance hard drives that store a huge amount of data.
“Grab everything now!” Twilight commanded as she began to rip off the hard drives. “The gas may have silenced the hornets’ nest but we have wolves prowling about the forest. Moondancer how the rest of the team?”
“The gas is harmless right?” Twinkleshine asked.
“Of course it is.” Lemon Hearts answered.
“Hold on.” Moondancer replied as she switched on all three radio channels. “Report in team.”
“Security room clear. The boys here are tied up and have no chance of slipping away.” Comet Tail their inside pony in the security room answered. “Taking this room would’ve been easier if we carried guns though.” He added as he wiped of the blood from his cheek.
“We’ve broken into Celestia’s quarters and have found several important documents and objects of interest.” Lightning Bolt the leader of the four-mare pegasi team answered. “I even got the hard drive of Celestia’s computer.”
“Copy that.” Moondancer replied. “Sorry Comet but you know Twilight’s opinion with carrying guns on heists.”
“It’s highly ineffective.” They both said in a mocking tone causing a giggle to come from both of them. “Everything’s going to plan.”
“All right we’re heading towards the garage.” Twilight said as she and her three associates ran through A hallway littered with unconscious ponies both civilian and guard.
“Hold on we have a car entering the main gate.” Comet tail said as he took a closer look. “It looks suspicious, Moondancer I su-”
Moondancer heard several gunshots interrupt Comet Tail. “Comet, Comet come in do you read me…. Comet speak to me.” Moondancer shouted frantically and that was she heard it.
“Security Room secure, hostile is down.” A voice said. “We have four unarmed unicorns with gas masks in the east wing hallway headed towards the guard armory. RBI reinforcements and SWAT will be here ETA five minutes.”
Moondancer was shattered. The security room has been retaken, their inside pony and the driver of the escape vehicle is gone and to make matters worse the Royal Bureau of Investigation is on to them.
“Twilight, Bolt, you need to get out of there Comet Tail is down.”
“What!” Twilight replied in surprise. “Fuck, alright looks like I’ll be driving then.”
“This is Bolt we’re flying out of the city and we have visual on the train.” Bolt Answered “We’re going to the port and I’d say you have fifteen before it arrives in Canterlot.”
“Well done Agent Sentry, I’ll be taking over from here.” A voice came from outside Moondancers van causing her to sit still. A few meters away from her vehicle in the parking lot was a stallion wearing a suit and tie walking towards the castle holding a gun and a gas mask. “I want you to keep me updated on their position.”
“Twilight.” Moondancer whispered. “You need to go… now! ” She continued. “We have an RBI agent heading towards the armory. He knows you’re there.”
“Hold on we’re at the armory.” Twilight replied. “The SUV should be at the garage.”
Moondancer looked towards where the agent was. He was gone. “Twilight I’ll meet you at the station.” Moon dancer said as she turned on her van and drove away.
“Roger that.” Twilight answered.
“So when’s Comet going to show up Twilight?” Minuette asked as she took entered the back seat.
Twilight entered the driver seat and sat silently gripping the steering wheel. “Lemon Hearts you ride shotgun.”
“Oh…” Minuette replied. “Damn it.” She mumbled.
Moondancer on the other hand was driving through the packed streets of Canterlot occasionally honking her horn at foals standing in the middle of the street. She felt heavy in her chest knowing that one of their longtime crew member and friend is now gone.
“You fucked up hard little mare.” A familiar voice came from her earpiece; it was the same voice that belonged to the agent in the security room.
“SHIT! ” Moondancer shouted. “Bolt you better be ready with that blizzard.”
“I’m working on it!” Bolt replied.
“Sir their lookout is headed towards the station and a team of pegasi working with them have already flown away.” RBI Agent Flash Sentry said through his radio as he smashed the earpiece he was holding. “The main group should be exiting the garage any moment now sir.”
“Roger that, we’ll take care of the lookout later I want you to get in the sky and keep an eye on the train. I’ll handle these fillies.” The senior agent replied as he revved up his car outside the guard armory garage door. It was an old Model 968 Dodge Charger with a large turbo charger mounted on its hood. “These fillies won’t know what hit him.”
“Yeah you have fun old man.” The young agent jokingly said as he inspected the body of the stallion he shot. “Good luck Sir Night Light.”
“I make my own luck.”
Just then the doors of the garage opened and the SUV went rolling out. Night Light stomped his hind hoof at the gas and soon he was chasing them through the busy streets. Ponies were jumping and running away from the streets. Twilight’s driving skills were no match against the seasoned veteran that was chasing them and the howling beast he was riding.
“Twilight he’s gaining on us!” Shouted Twinkleshine as the SUV entered the town square.
“Hold on I got an idea.” Twilight said as she opened her car window and fired a blast of magic towards one of the large decorated fir tree at the center of the square.
Night Light saw a little filly trip while running away from the falling tree. The sight of a poor defenseless filly about to get crushed made the old man’s paternal instinct kick in. He drove towards the filly at full speed opened the door of the car and at the very last moment, snatched the little filly before she was crushed. He then stepped out of the car and returned the little filly to her mother. He knows that the heartless bitch is far away and mocking him for his foolishness, but he’s going to catch up to them.He entered his car and turned it on and gripped the steering wheel hard.
“You just made this personal kid.” Night Light said as he looked at a picture of him and his daughter, a daughter he loved and lost.
------[T]/------
“Wow, what a dumbass.” Lemon Hearts said as she leaned back on her seat.
“You could’ve killed someone Twilight!” Twinkleshine shouted.
“We’re alive, WERE ALIVE !” Minuette shouted with joy.
Twilight on the other hand was silent. She knew what she did was wrong but she isn’t the type of pony who would throw away everything for a little morality. But her action still weighed heavily on her chest.
“There’s the train!” Lemon Hearts pointed at the train that was already affair distance away from them. “Shit we’re screwed.”
“Don’t worry I know a shortcut.” Twilight said as she drove to the side of the mountain.
“Twilight NO !” Minuette shouted in despair from the backseat.
“Twilight YES !” Lemon Hearts shouted knowing that they’re fucked either way.
Twinkleshine on the other hand just screamed as Twilight drove down the mountain side in order to catch up to the train. They made it down to the base of the mountain in one piece but their car is now a piece of rolling scrap.
“We made it!” Shouted Minuette as he hugged Twinkleshine.
“Holy shit how is this car still running?!” Lemon Hearts asked in surprise as she rubbed her bruised head.
“Supperior Germane engineering.” Answered Twilight. “Hey I see our train.” Twilight pointed to the train that was only a short drive from where they are. She saw Moondancer waving frantically at one of the open cargo caboose
They drove towards and soon Twilight was driving beside the open cargo caboose of the train. Twilight’s passenger jumped on board one by one along with their take from the heist until only Twilight was lest on the car.
“Come on Twilight, you can do it!” Moondancer shouted as she reached a hoof out to Twilight.
Twilight opened the door and was about to jump when a bullet hit one of the front tires of the car causing it to drive away from the train and it made Twilight loose balance and tumble in the snow.
“Twilight!” Moondancer shouted as she was about to jump from the train but was held back by her three companions.
“She’s gone Moondancer.” Said Lemon Hearts as she held her friend back.
“I just lost Comet, I’m not gonna loose her as well.” Moondancer shouted but to no avail. Eventually she stopped and collapsed in the floor crying and grieving at the loss of her close friends.
------[T]/------
“Bullseye!” Agent Sentry shouted from one of the clouds as he pulled back the bolt of his sniper rifle. “Wait! Damn I missed.” As he pointed his scope to Twilight’s unconscious body. He turned his scope s little further to his left and saw Night Lights car roaring through the snow only to stop about 10 meters away from Twilight. “This is going to be interesting.”
“Uhh, my head.” Twilight mumbled as she slowly stood up.
“It’s been eight whole years Twilight.”
Twilight stopped. She knew that voice. “D-dad?” Twilight mumbled as she opened her eyes.
“I always thought the day you ran away was the worst day of my life. But this day… this reunion… this is the worst for me as a father.” Night Light threw a pair of hoofcuffs in the snow in front of Twilight. “Now put those on… before I decide to do it myself.”
Twilight didn’t reply. Instead she drew her combat knife and assumed an aggressive stance. “I never once thought in my career that it would come down to this.”
“The same goes for me.” Night Light said as he took his shock baton. “What am I going to say to your mother?” Night Light asked as a single tear flowed down his cheek.
“Tell her I’m sorry for how I left, and that I was never sorry for the path I took.” Twilight said as he pointed the tip of her knife to her father as they moved in a circle.
“I have failed you Twilight, I never knew where I went wrong.” Night Light apologized as he lowered his weapon. “Please just stop, come back to us. I’m sure we can fix this; we can fix you.”
“It was never your fault dad.” Twilight replied. “This entire shit-show was rigged from the very start.” Twilight said as she charged towards her father.
Night Light dodged the aggressive charge by dashing to his right. And when he was facing Twilight’s undefended side he swung his baton. And with that single decisive hit the fight was over.
Twilight laid unconscious on the ground as Night Light cuffed her. He then carried her gently towards his car. It took him a lot of effort to hold back his tears but in the end he wasn’t able to stop it. He sat on the driver seat as he sobbed like a little foal for two whole minutes. He spent the past eight years frantically searching for her, hoping that he will find his beloved daughter only to curse the day he was reunited with her.
“I gotta say…” Night Light said as he looked up to the heavens. “This is one hell of a fucking holiday.” He wiped his tears and cleared his throat.
After a while, a voice from the radio on the cars dashboard called out. “Sir this is Agent Tracker we have lost visual of the train. We lost them in a blizzard.”
“Keep searching, they shouldn’t be far.” Night Light answered.
“Yes sir!”
He sighed as he took a cigar from his chest pocked and put it in his mouth only to realize that he didn’t have any matches. “Fuck me.” He muttered.
“Need a light sir?” Agent Sentry asked as he held out a box of matches in his hoof from the window of the car.
“Yeah… thanks.” Night Light answered as he took a match and lit it.
“Do you know her sir?” The young agent asked as he looked at the mare peacefully sleeping in the seat beside Night Light.
“She is my daughter.” Night Light answered.
“Must’ve been one hell of a reunion then?” Agent Sentry asked.
“I don’t want to talk about it.” Night Light replied with a sigh. “Anyway you did one hell of a job Sentry, I’ll be sure to commend you when this is all wrapped up. Hell, I might even get you a promotion.”
“Will you turn her in sir.” The yellow Pegasus stallion asked. Night Light can clearly see that his right wing was resting over his saddles holster.
“I will.” Night Light answered.
“A wise choice sir.” Agent Sentry replied with a sincere smile. “You do know what’s going to happen to her right?”
“I do.” Night Light replied as he inserted his car key. “And I’ll be sure to interrogate her myself.”
“See you at Canterlot then.” Flash said as he flew towards the city in the mountain.
Night Light began driving but his mind was still trying to wrap itself over what happened. Why did her daughter turn to a life of crime? Was it her destiny, a twist of fate perhaps, or was it something else entirely. Whatever it was Night Light will never know, what he did know is that he will turn Twilight in even if it pains him to do so.
Author's Note
This is my first story so I hope you guys go easy on me.
My Little Convicts - Crime is Magic
Chapter 1 - A New “Dawn”
Twilight woke up in her cell and rubbed her eyes as she looked at the alarm clock. “Uhhh.” She groaned as she realized it was still 5 am in the morning. “More sleep for me.” She said as she laid down on her bed. “After one book.” She stood up from her seat and walked over to the shelf to pick up a book. It would have been a lot easier if she had magic, but her horn collar prevented such an action.
After she was captured, Twilight was placed in solitary confinement in Canterlot’s Castles dungeon. security prison. She had a rather clean and decent cell with its own toilet, study desk with a lamp and a bookshelf filled with whatever books her mother sent her. And the best part was she had it all to herself.
Under normal circumstances she would have been executed without trial for high treason and acts of terror. But since her mother is a noble and a very close friend of Celestia, she was instead kept prisoner and was regularly interrogated on the whereabouts of her fellow thieves by her own dad. She refused to speak and kept her mouth shut every session.
Her mother was overjoyed to see her given the circumstances that led to her capture. They had a heartfelt conversation and she told Twilight that she managed to convince the princess to spare her. Eventually the guard had to pry her away from Twilight because she refused to leave. Twilight on the other hand was relieved that she was saved from the Gallows.
Her brother on the other hand was an entirely different story. He was the Celestia’s finest guard as well as the captain of the canterlot garrison. And let’s just say he wasn’t as enthusiastic meeting the pony who made him look like a total fool. There was a heated argument and he walked away disgusted at what his little sister has become.
Twilight looked up to the calendar from her study. “Summer Sun Celebration huh.” She said as she opened her book. “I guess sunbutt’s busy being a sunbutt.” She said as she remembered how her old teacher expressed how disappointed she was. Twilight replied to her by making whale sounds much to the monarch’s annoyance. Celestia really hates it when you don’t take her seriously.
Several loud knows came from her door as she turned towards it. “Face the wall of the cell and put your hooves where I can see them.”
She obliged but was surprised. Normally when she was interrogated, her dad will just walk into the cell and casually ask questions. But she was never ordered to face the wall and never was she interrogated this early in the morning. She trotted towards the wall and did as she was told.
Two armored RBI agents in SWAT gear stormed in the room. The blindfolded and cuffed her as they dragged her out. Twilight’s heart was racing. This was the first time she was taken out of her cell ever since she was imprisoned. What were they gonna do to her. Did they prepare a special interrogation room, are they going to torture her or has Celestia had enough of her silence and decided keeping her alive is no longer worth it?
“What the hay is going on!” Twilight asked. The guards didn’t respond as they continued to drag her. “Hey I’m talking to you. Answe-mphh ” she mumbled as she was gagged by a third guard.
Twilight heard an elevator door open and began to fight back and resist much to the annoyance of the agents. She felt the butt of a rifle slam into her back causing her to groan in pain and cease her struggle. After thirty awkward seconds riding the elevator the doors opened and she was dragged into a room and was sat down in a sofa.
One of the three agents ungagged Twilight and removed her blindfold while the two other stood guard at the doorway. Twilight inspected the room she was in. It was a large personal office with a bugbear rug on the floor. There were bookshelves and picture frames as well as an ancient set of unicorn armor holding a longsword by the fireplace. Behind the desk in front of her was a tall white unicorn pony with a blonde mane looking over Canterlot throught the window.
“Who are you and what the fuck is going on here?” Twilight asked as she rubbed her aching back. The mysterious pony commanded the agents. “Leave us.” The guards immediately left without questioning his command.
“A beautiful night sky isn’t it Twilight?” The pony asked as he used his magic to take a bottle of wine and two wine glasses from one of the many shelves in the room.
“Yeah, it is a nice sky.” Twilight answered. “But Sunbutt’s going to raise her fat ass any minute now. So back to my earlier question, why the fuck am I here?”
“I’m afraid Aunt Celestia will no longer raise the sun anymore.” He said he uncorked the bottle of wine and poured its contents in the two glasses in the desk behind him as he continued to look on. “She’s gone.” He added without a hint of emotion in his voice.
Before the stallion can take one of the glasses, Twilight lunged forward and drank both of them before raising her hooves in the air and shouting. “Finally! About time that bitch took a well-deserved nap.” The mysterious pony only sighed at Twilight’s reaction. “Wait a minute. Did you just call Celestia, Aunt Celestia?.... Blueblood?”
The mysterious pony turned around and looked at Twilight with a stoic expression in his face. “Yes. It’s me.” He said plainly.
“So how’d she die?” Twilight asked as she took the entire bottle and began gulping its contents. “Was it diabetes?”
“Thankfully, no. She did not di-”
“Fuck!” Twilight interrupted as she slumped on the sofa. “Guess I owe someone fifty bits.”
“She’s not dead.” Blueblood explained as he sat on his chair. “She’s been foalnapped.”
“Well, that’s one crook I wouldn’t want to meet in a dark alley in the middle of the night.” Twilight said as she drank some more of the wine.
“I couldn’t agree with you more.” The prince replied as he snatched the bottle of wine from Twilight’s hooves and poured himself a drink.
“Hey!”
“She’s been foalnapped by Nightmare Moon.” Blueblood said as he took a sip from his glass. “She took her during the opening ceremony in Ponyville. As we speak the town burns.”
“Was she assisted by cultists?”
“Yes.”
“Were they same ones from high school?”
“…yes.”
“Well what’d you know, guess I wasn’t so delusional at high school wasn’t I?” Twilight said.
“Twilight, proving one’s point by providing concrete evidence is not delusional. Assaulting suspected “Nightmare Moon” worshippers on the other hand… it’s a bit over the top.”
“In my defense they are indeed cultists.” Twilight replied.
“You see Twilight; this is the reason everyone avoided you during high school.” Blueblood explained. “You’re a psychopath”
“But why didn’t you avoid me in high school?” Twilight asked.
“Because you looked like someone who would start a school shooting.” Blueblood said plainly. “I simple want to be in you ‘good’ side. You know just in case you finally snap.”
“Really Blueblood?” Twilight cocked an eyebrow at Blueblood.
“Just kidding, I hung out with you because our families are allies.” Blueblood explained. “And allies look after each other Twilight, they don’t ditch each other because of some moody teenage problem.”
“Yeah, yeah spare me the mumbo jumbo Blue, but… what does this foalnapping have to do with me?” Twilight asked.
“We’ll get to that later.” Blueblood answered as he leaned back on his chair. “But you have some explaining to do first.” He said as he pulled several files from a drawer. “It seems that you have quite a record. High treason, armed robbery, acts of terror, possession of illegal weapons, and theft.” He continued as he reviewed her file.
“And how have you been doing ‘your majesty’?” Twilight asked sarcastically. Blueblood answered by pointing his cane to his painting on the wall. It reads
Prince Blueblood XXV – Director General of the Royal Bureau of Investigation
“Big deal! I bet it’s just nepotism at work.” Twilight grumbled. Blueblood used his cane to turn a picture frame on his desk for Twilight to see. It was a picture of Blueblood wearing the typical RBI field agent uniform standing on top of a captured ten wheeler truck filled to the brim while RBI agents unloading sacks of cocaine and other contraband.
“I’ve been busy these past eight years.” Blueblood said as he threw the file back to its drawer. “Now where were we? Ah yes, you may have been wondering why I had you escorted here.”
“Escorted! I think dragged would be a better term for that.” Twilight said.
“Whatever, I’ll just get to the point.” Blueblood said as he stood up. “I’m making you the leader of a six mare team composed of convicts whose goal is to rescue Celestia.”
Twilight laughed. “Rescue her! Seriously, after she ruined my life.” She laughed harder this time. “Oh Blue you were always the comedian aren’t you.”
“I’m serious.” Blueblood replied. “And for the record she didn’t ruin your life, you did.”
Twilight’s expression turned sour at Bluebloods last statement “It was rigged Blue!” Twilight shouted angrily. “The fucking egg test was rigged and she didn’t tell me even years after it was finished.” She began to tremble with hate.
“You succeeded the test Twilight.” Blueblood explained. “You really aren’t supposed to hatch it; she just wants to see how your magic will react to it.”
“I spent seven fucking years loathing in self-pity thinking I was only able to enter because of my mother’s influence.” Twilight shouted as she stood up from the sofa and went face to face with Blueblood who looked down to her. “She means nothing to me Blue.”
“You were the top student in the school.” Blueblood reasoned once more. “You even placed all her personal apprentices to shame.”
“And did you remember what I told her when she offered to take me as an apprentice?” Twilight as she put on a fake smile.
“You told her to e-”
“EAT SHIT! ” Twilight interrupted him with a roar of pure anger. “And I told her to take that stupid egg she uses in her rigged test and shove it waaayyyy up her butthole. That was seven fucking years of pure hate released in a single conversation Blue.”
“Twilight, you’re over reacting.” Blueblood reasoned.
“I’ve had with your shit Blue.” Twilight roared as she pointed a hoof at Blueblood. “Just take me back to my cell.” She commanded.
“It’s not like you have a choice here.” Blueblood explained. “And besides, I’ll be sure you’re compensated appropriately for your work.”
“Suck my purple unicorn pussy Blue!”
“You know, unlike you, I keep my promises.” Blueblood replied.
“I’m hearing talking, but not sucking.”
“Remember this is just my promise, Celestia might just throw something else into the pot.”
Twilight stood still for a moment and thought deeply about her next course of action. ‘a faver from Celestia huh.’ She thought. ‘Oh, I have just the thing.’. “Fine, I’ll do it.” Twilight said as she sat down.
“Your gonna do it?” He asked.
“Yes.”
“Why?” He asked. “Was is it that you want from Celestia?”
“I’m gonna keep it a secret for now.” She replied. “But want a fucking bathtub and a shower heater in my cell.”
Blueblood nodded. “I’ll be sure to have it installed.”
“And a fridge filled with the best cider.” Twilight added.
“I can do that as well.” Blueblood said. “But that’s as far as the deal goes.”
“We have a deal then?” Twilight asked.
“Of course.” Blueblood said as he extended his hoof towards Twilight. The two shook hooves in agreement. Twilight was about to pull her hoof away when Blueblood pulled her closer and whispered into her ear. “Don’t fuck around Twilight. Come back alive, I don’t want you dying on my account.”
Twilight pushed him away. “Alright. Jeez man, do you know the term personal-space.”
“My apologies.” Blueblood replied. “But seriously, if you die on my account our families will start killing each other.”
“Yea whatever! Will I get to pick my crew?”
“No.”
“Oh come on.” Twilight complained.
A knock came from the door and a white unicorn mare with a black mane wearing large square glasses holding a clipboard entered the room. “They’re ready for you your majesty.” The secretary bowed.
“Thank you Miss Raven.” Blueblood replied as he gestured for Twilight to follow him. While they were walking Twilight suddenly remembered the critical error in her last heist. The driver.
“What happened to Comet, Blue?” Twilight asked. “What happened? Did he make it out? Is he being held here as well?”
“I’m sorry Twilight, but no one can really survive a .357 to the head.” He answered
------[T]/------
They took the elevator and arrived to a room with five ponies. There was a cyan mare with a rainbow colored mane, a white unicorn, a friendly looking pink mare in a strapjacket, an earth pony mare wearing a Stetson and a pink maned Pegasus mare who looked high as a kite.
Blueblood cleared his throat. “Before I start are all of you aware why you’re here.” Four of the mare’s didn’t say a word as they nodded, the fifth one however was too high to speak. “Good, then I guess you’re already well acquainted.”
“Sort off.” The mare wearing a Stetson answered. “I still don’t get why you want us to do it, but if it gets us released from prison then I’m all in.”
“Oh my!” Giggled the white unicorn as she inspected the hunk of horseflesh standing before her. “Baby, what do they call you?” She flirted.
‘I’m fucked am I.’ Twilight thought to herself as she inspected her crew. A bunch ragtag convict that looked like they were picked randomly from the fray. ‘Well I never thought I would die a kissless virgin.’ She continued her line of thought. ‘I could fix that though.’ She thought as she looked at Bluebloods ass. She smacked herself. ‘Stop thinking like that Twilight, you are not going to die. You’re going to live.’
“Are you okay Twilight?” Blueblood asked.
“What!” She replied as she looked at the prince. “Uh… Yeah. I’m uh… fine… I guess.”
“Moving on I would like to introduce you to your team leader.” Blueblood said as she pointed her hoof at Twilight. “This is Twilight Sparkle; she will be the pony you will be taking orders from.”
“Yo Sparky!” The Rainbow maned mare greeted. “So what got you turned in.”
“Terrorism and High Treason.” Twilight answered with a stern face. “And it’s Sparkle by the way. What got you in.”
“Carjacking.” The rainbow mare answered.
“Really Blue!” Twilight said.
“Don’t be fooled Twilight.” Blueblood said reassuringly. “This mare has done every kind of petty crime in the book.” He said. “Wait! I worry what you just heard was “This mare did a lot of petty crime.” What I said was This mare. Has done every kind of petty crime. On the book.”
“You got that right Blueballs.” The rainbow mare teased.
Twilight giggled at the rainbow mares reply. “I have a feeling we’re goiong to be great friends.”
“Maybe… maybe, we’ll see.” She replied. “The names Rainbow Dash”
“What about the rest of you?” Twilight asked as she turned to the rest of the mares. “What are you all turned in for.”
“Smuggling.” The Stetson mare answered. “The boys in Manehatten call me Applejack..”
“My online scam was busted.” The white unicorn said dramatically. “Oh, and I’m Rarity”
“This mare has cooked, sold and taken every kind of illegal drug,” Blueblood said as he pointed a hoof to the mare that was staring at the ceiling fan following that one blade while rotating her head like a retard. “And I do mean every kind of illegal drug. Fluttershy’s what they call her.”
“What about you.” Twilight asked as she approached the mare with a strap jacket. “What did you do.”
“I had the world at my hooves.” The pink mare said. “But this agent, he took it away from me. All of it.”
“And who is this agent?” Twilight asked.
“He says his name is Mane, Con Mane.” The pink mare answered.
“Dr. Pinkie Pie over here was the head of a secret underground organization bent on world domination.” Blueblood explained as he trotted towards Twilight’s side. “She was about to succeed, and if it weren’t for the efforts of Agent Con Mane codename 007, she would have taken over on two separate occasions. And that being said, she failed twice.”
“Just wait until I get these straps of Prince.” Pinkie Pie said. “I’ll have you and that damned Agent Con Mane suspended in a rope as I slowly lower you in a tank full of sharks.”
“Great, so we a have a professional street thug, a drug addict/dealer/cook, a smuggler, an online scammer and a spy movie villain.” Twilight said. “I guess this will all work out fine.” She said sarcastically.
“I’ll leave be leaving you here for a while, I have business to attend to.” Blueblood said as he walked out. Before he closed the door however he looked back and said. “You are to wait here until I return. If any of you attempt to run away, you will be shot on sight.”
“Sure thing boss.” Twilight replied. “Me and the girls will just have a friendly chat as while Nightmare Moon does faust knows what to her sister Celestia.” She sarcastically continued.
Blueblood chuckled at Twilight’s reply much to her surprise. “It’s good to have you back Twilight. I won’t be long.” He said as he closed the door and left.
“You two should totally bang.” Pinke Pie whispered.
My Little Convicts - Crime is Magic
Chapter 2 - The Dead Six
“So…” Applejack broke the silence. “What exactly did you do to get imprisoned?” She asked Twilight.
“I did a heist at Canterlot Castle.” Twilight answered.
“Fearless and ready to take on the biggest prize against all odds.” Dr. Pie commented. “I like your guts.”
“What were you trying to steal by the way?” Rarity asked. “Gold, Jewels, Artifacts?”
“Information.” Twilight answered. “Information that could fetch you a lot of money if sold to the right pony or… organization.”
“How’d you get past security?” Rainbow asked. “You can’t just waltz in that place right?”
“We planned the heist for a month.” Twilight explained. “We decided to use some sort of knockout gas to give us a thirty-minute window for the robbery. We also shut down the city’s power grid to confuse the authorities.”
“Did the rest of your crew made it out?”
“I guess they did.” Twilight answered. “It’s quite sad actually. Planning the perfect heist, the heist of the millennium, only to get yourself caught and imprisoned.” Twilight looked at them and said. “Wait! Why are you only asking me, do you all know each other?”
“Sort off…” Dr. Pie said. “Let me explain. Dash over here was a henchmare of mine. I used to buy my weapons from Miss Applejack who was caught in multiple pyramid schemes orchestrated by Rarity, who buys her drugs from Fluttershy.”
“Wait! How did you know I get my weed from Fluttershy?” Asked Rarity.
“You all know you bought drugs from me at least once right?” Fluttershy said as she snapped back into reality. Her bloodshot eyes wide open with a forced smile on her face.
“Fluttershy you’re back.” Rainbow dash greeted.
“I guess I am.” She replied.
“You were in prison right?” Twilight asked. “How did you get high while behind bars?”
“I know how to make drugs from urine, shit and scraped paint from the walls.” Fluttershy answered.
“Eww.” Twilight said as she backed away from her slightly.
“I know something we could do.” Fluttershy said as her nose began to bleed. “We could talk about our cutie marks.”
“Uh… I think it’ll be more appropriate to call a doctor instead.” Twilight suggested
“Oh Twilight, ‘cough’ ‘cough’ I feel just fine.” Fluttershy replied as she coughed out some blood. “I’ll go first.”
Fluttershy showed them her cutie mark which was a chemistry set. She explained that she got it when she ‘accidentally’ cooked meth while trying to create a superior cough syrup for her little brother. From there she began her career as a drug cook and made it her goal to spread love and peace among ponies through her drugs.
“That was an interesting story.” Twilight commented as she backed away slightly from the yellow mare. “Guess I’ll tell you all my story then.”
They all looked at her cutiemark, it was a checklist with 3 boxes that had tick marks in the form of a six sided purple star. She explains that her talent is detailed planning. She got it when she conspired with several students to burn down the faculty building because their essays got low scores. After a month of planning the arson was carried out and no pony ever knew it was them.
“You should consider working for me if we ever get out of prison.” Dr. Pie proposed. “I have use for ponies with talents like you.”
“Thanks, but I prefer to be the one in charge of my life, so…. No.” Twilight replied.
“Alright moving on, I guess it’s my turn then.” Rainbow Dash said as she lifter her ass. “Check out this bad boy.”
The cutie mark was a red circle with a capitalized ‘A’ on it, the symbol of anarchy, with a red lightning bolt at the back. She explained that she got her cutie mark after she rode a scooter without a helmet. She became a teen rebel breaking every rule she can. She decided to run away from home and do all sorts of petty crime. She worked for multiple gangs before ending up with Dr. Pie’s organization.
“So what’d you think?” Dash asked
“Wow… that was uh... Interesting… I guess.” Twilight answered earning her an annoyed look from Dash.
“Mah turn.” Said Applejack.
She showed them her cutie mark which was a crate with an apple painted on it. She explained that at a young age, she was good at hiding contraband in various forms of storage and convinced everyone that it was just apples. She got her mark after she sold pot which was stored in an aluminum pot to some of her fellow classmates in Manehattan.
“I’ve been living in Manehattan since I was eight and I’ve built my smuggling enterprise there.” Applejack proudly proclaimed. “Sadly, the RBI noticed what I was doing and suddenly out of nowhere this blue unicorn with yellow eyes burst through my warehouses window and took as down.”
“Did he have a crescent moon and a star for a cutie mark?” Twilight asked.
“Yeah.”
“That’s my dad.”
“Bastard’s a one pony army.”
“Ahem.” Rarity coughed. “I believe it’s my turn.”
They looked at her cutie mark, it was a blue rose with thorns at its stem. She was good at convincing other ponies with her charm and she often abused it for personal gain. She got it when she convinced a depressed classmate to hang himself for her amusement.
“I was the best scammer in equestrian.” Rarity said dramatically. “And then the RBI showed up at my house and I knew I was fucked.”
“Wait, I think I’ve met you before.” Twilight said. “Yes. I attempted to hire you once remember.”
“Ah, so that’s why you seem familiar.” Rarity replied. “And I’ll ask you the same question again Miss Sparkle. Do I look like a seven percent to you?”
“You know each other?” Rainbow Dahs asked.
“Hold on a second.” Applejack said. “Can ya’ll explain all this hiring and seven percent stuff.”
“I attempted to hire her once to be our inside mare in the Equestrian Diamond Center.” Twilight explained. “I offered her a seven percent cut from the take but she was offended.”
“And I refused.” Rarity continued. “Seven percent is simply outrageous.”
“It’s quite reasonable when you realize the take was seventy million.” Twilight replied. The room fell silent at the revelation. Everypony including Dr. Pie and Rarity had their mouth’s wide open. The only sound that came from the room was the snoring of Fluttershy who dozed off a while ago. “And beside’s you’re untested.”
“What!” rarity shouted. “Why didn’t you tell me the heist was going to yield that much?”
“It was the fucking Equestrian Diamond Center Rarity. The largest in collection of genstomes, gold and diamonds in all of equestria, even larger than Celestia’s obese rump.” Twilight answered. “What, do you think we were going to get a fucking pocket change from that. Fuck no! We got fucking rich bitch, but we did not stop.”
“How many robberies have you made?” dash asked.
“Seventeen banks, five jewelry stores, a cargo ship filled with ‘goods’, the Equestrian Diamond Center and Canterlot Castle.” Twilight said as she thought deeply. “About twenty-six.”
“Sweet Celestia.” Rarity said. “Well… that’s another thing to add to my list of regrets.”
“Are you all done?” Dr. Pinkie asked. “Good. Now gather round children cause Aunt Pinkies going to tell you a story of a villain, the greatest villain that ever lived.”
“Oh boy here we go again.” Rainbow Dash mumbled as she rolled her eyed.
Pinkie Pie raised her ass with pride and showed of her cutie mark. It was a golden eagle, the symbol of a new world order. She claimed that she got it when she was visited by the ghost of her grandfather. The ghost told her that it was her destiny to lead the ponies of her nation into a bright tomorrow, to unite all city states into one empire and to establish a new world order. So she worked hard and earned a doctorate at V. Illain University and founded her underground organization.
“Within five years I have almost complete control over the entire Equestrian underground.” Dr. Pinkie explained dramatically. “And if it weren’t for that damned Con Mane I would’ve succeeded!”
Pinkie looked around only to see that her five companions were huddled together sleeping peacefully. Pinkie Pie sighed in disappointment as she woke them up one by one. Just as they got up a knock came from a door followed by Blueblood entering followed by six RBI agents wearing SWAT combat armor. The six agent went over to the gathered convicts and took off their shackles and magic restraints.
“Finally.” Twilight said as she touched her bare horn. “Now I can use my magic again.” She then proceeds to scratch her back telekinetically.
“So, what happens now?” The apple mare asked as she stretched her hooves
Blueblood ordered the six agents to leave and just as they left another agent walked in. This stallion was wearing the standard field agent outfit which was a simple black suit with neck tie and shades. He had an average build, yellow coat, blue mane and wings.
“I’d like to introduce you to your handler.” Blueblood gestured to the agent. “This is Agent Flash Sentry, one of our youngest and finest agents.”
“Handler?” Twilight said as he cocked a brow. “Blue, what is the meaning of this?”
“I can’t just set you free in the Everfree forest without anyone to handle all of you.” Blueblood explained. “He’s here to make sure none of you would run off.”
“Really Blueballs.” Dash complained. “It’s not like we’ll stab you in the back or anything.”
Without warning, Flash pointed his revolver at Rainbow Dash.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, chill out dude.” Dash said as she raised her hooves.
“Drop the shiv ma’am.” Flask ordered.
“What do you mean?”
“Drop it!”
Rainbow Dash raised her wings and a single rusty shiv dropped on the floor. “Now, kick it away.” Flash ordered. Rainbow Dash did as she was told and kicked, sending it sliding across the floor towards Flash who picked it up and holstered his gun.
“As I said, one of our finest agents.” Blueblood bragged.
“Is there any other alternative to having a handler.” Twilight asked.
“We do have explosive collars, perhaps you want to try s-”
“Alright… alright.” Twilight interrupted. “We’ll bring the handler with us. ”
“For the record, I’m fine with the handler.” Rarity declared. “He’s one hot stud.” She said seductively as she licked her lips.
“I’ll be leaving you to him and he will brief you on your mission and get you suited up.” Blueblood said as he began to walk away. “Oh and he’s authorized to put any of you down if you prove to be a threat to the mission.” He added before he closed the door.
“Follow me please.” He commanded.
He leads all of them, including Fluttershy who was still tripping balls, across the hallway towards the armory room. While they were walking Flash briefed them on their mission. “The mission is simple, Nightmare Moons hiding in an ancient castle in the Everfree forest. A helicopter will drop us on top of Nightmare Moons hideout and we’ll do the rest.”
“That’s the plan?” Twilight said as she cocked a brow. “Will we get any additional support?”
“Yeah that’s about it.” Flash answered. “But I hear the director’s getting something that might help us from the royal archives.” He slowed his pace and when he was beside Twilight he asked her a question. “Were you the one who orchestrated the ‘Heist of the Millennium’?”
“So they call it that huh.” she replied. “Yeah it was me.”
“Then I guess it’s just right that you should have this.” He said as he handed out a bloodstained photo.
“What’s that?” Pinkie asked as she peeked from Twilight’s side.
“Where did you get this?” Twilight asked with a surprised tone. The bloodstained picture showed Twilight and her colleague Moon Dancer holding bags filled with jewelry. It was from taken after her first heist with her original crew of three. This photo was taken by their third crew member, a common drag racer that Twilight molded into the ultimate getaway driver, Comet Tail.
“I was there Twilight.” Flash replied. “And he was there as well.. in the security room. I did what I had to do.”
“Casualties happen.” Twilight said plainly. She didn’t really have a care in the world for her crew, and it was her personal rule to have no attachments with any of them. To her they were just numbers in her schemes. But she still reflected on all the heists that ended in success because of her getaway driver. “Nothing can bring him back anyway.”
“Yes… Nothing.” Flash said grimly.
Soon they arrived at a large armory filled with guns and body armor sealed in glass cases. The quartermaster emerged from the counter and greeted them. “How’re you doing Sentry.”
“I’m fine Hoof Crank.” He replied. “I’m here to get these mares’ suited up.” He explained
“Ahh, I see you brought the Dead Six with you.” Hoof Crank said as he reached for something under the counter.
“Dead Six?” Rarity asked.
“This is a suicidal mission, even for a field agent like me.” Flash explained.
“Aye, that’s why the higher ups call you mares the Dead Six.” Crank added as he placed a dox in the counter. “Standard field agent armor, finest protection you can get in the agency.” He said as he opened the box.
“What the fuck!” Rainbow Dash shouted as she pushed Rarity aside and took one of the black suits and neck tie. “You call this ‘armor’, seriously! This is a fucking suit!” She complained as she wore it and styled her mane to look like Flash’s. “Oh look at me I’m Flash Sentry. I’m the finest agent in the RBI. pew pew pew ” she mocked as she made wing guns and fired them at Flash.
Without warning Flash pulled his revolver causing everyone to duck except Hoof Crank who quickly out on his ear plugs. Flash fired a single shot at Rainbow Dash’s chest. She screamed in pain, until she realized she isn’t in any form of physical pain.
“W-w-what th-the f-f-f-fuck!” She stammered as she reached for where the bullet supposedly hit. She found a single flattened slug. “H-h-how?”
“What sorcery is this?” Dr. Pinkie asked. “I demand answers.”
“MK IV elite agency armor.” Flash answered as he took one of the suits. “Lightweight, scratch resistant, fire resistant, water proof, fashionable and bulletproof thanks to a thin layer of synthetic dragon leather lining inside the suit’s coat.” He explained as he threw one to Dr. Pinkie who immediately wore it.
“It feels like a regular suit.” Dr. Pinkie said as he adjusted her clothes.
“What kind of synthetic dragon leather lining are we talking about here?” Twilight asked as she handed the suits towards the rest of her crew.
“Well you see, our scientists were able to grow a specific type of dragon skin that was light and tough from a ‘special’ type of leather found in a dragons…” He trailed of as he thought twice about what he was going to say next.
“In a dragon’s what?” Asked Twilight as she arranged her neck tie.
“The leather was grown from the bits of a dragon’s scrotum.” Flash continued as he sighed.
“Aw, what the fuck!” Pinkie and Twilight shouted as they took of the suit’s coat and threw it away.
“What’s wrong?” Rarity asked. “I think the suit is absolutely fabulous darling.”
“Rarity you are wearing a fucking ball sack.” Twilight explained.
“Eww, eww, eww, eww, eww.” Rarity said as she clawed the garment off.
“Meh, beats getting blown up.” Applejack said plainly. “Right Rainbow Dash?”
“Damn right AJ.” Dash answered. “I mean, you get to say you wearing a dragons ball sack, that’s a whole new level of bad ass. Right Fluttershy.”
“I smoked a Dragon’s Balls once.” Fluttershy said as she stared of into the distance. “It was some fine ass shit.”
Everypony in the room was silent for a while with their mouths wide open in shock.
“Is she serious?” Hoof Crank asked Rainbow Dash.
“Well, since this is Fluttershy… I guess she’s really serious.”
“Anyway, the dragon leather is really synthetic and lab grown, so it’s completely clean.”
Twilight and Pinkie agreed that wearing the ball sack suit was for the best and after a while of convincing, they were able to make Rarity wear it again
“Okay… Crank, do you have the guns?” Flash asked.
“I have em r-”
“No guns!”Twilight shouted.
“What do you mean, no guns?” Flash asked.
“You may be our handler, but I’m still in charge of the team.” Twilight explained. “And I say, no guns.”
“But, but, how are we going to defeat Nightmare Moon!” Flash attempted to reason.
“Yeah Twilight, we really need those guns.” Applejack added.
“Actually you don’t.” Came a voice from the doorway.
“Your majesty!” Crank and Flash greeted as they stood in attention.
“Blue, where the fuck’ve you been.” Twilight said in surprise.
“We got word that Nightmare Moon is hiding in the ruins of the Castle of the Two Sister.” He said before he handed a large file to Twilight. “Have you ever heard of the Elements of Harmony.” He asked.
“I read about it.” Twilight answered. “The six legendary stones that banished Nightmare Moon to the moon.” Twilight continued as she opened the file. It had a picture of the six stones being held in some sort of display. “I hear it has been lost since she was banished.”
“What is I told you it still in the ruined castle.” Blueblood said with a sly smile.
“I like your plan Blue.” Twilight replied. “Flash we won’t be needing the guns.”
“Fine!” He said as he crossed his front hooves and sat down.
“We don’t need any guns.” Twilight said as she pointed a hoof at Flash’s holster.
“I still need something to protect myself in case the six of you gang up on me.” Flash replied with a smug look on his face.
“He has a point.” Blueblood argued.
“Alright, you can keep your gun.” Twilight grumbled. “But it’ll be only used on us and you won’t bring extra ammo. So keep that thing fully loaded.”
“We’ll do… ma’am.” He replied in a mocking tone.
“Your chopper is ready.” Blueblood said. “Follow me Please”
Blueblood lead them to the roof of the agency building which had a helipad with a helicopter waiting for them. They boarded the helicopter and strapped themselves in.
“Good Luck!” Blueblood shouted. “And remember, you’re our last hope.”
“What do you mean last h-” Twilight was cut off as Blueblood closed the door of the helicopter. “Wait, Blueblood. What the fuck did you mean?”
But it was no use. He just stood there, watching silently as the helicopter flew across the night sky. He turns around with his head hung low and starts the long walk back to his office. He looked forward and stopped when he spotted a familiar pink pony waiting by the doorway. “You know for a pony who has a cynical view on the world, you sure put a lot of trust on a pony who ditched you, her family and everypony who cared about her eight years ago.”
‘’Yeah, and that reminds me, whose idea was it to bring back the elements of harmony?” Blueblood asked sarcastically.
“Alright I get it.” The mare replied. “But I’m a little curious on how you made her agree so quickly even if you’re in a desperate position.”
“Because she knows that I may know someone else who’ll be more willing to take the job. A certain someone from the ‘other side of the mirror’ who I can ‘fish out’ and do the job she was supposed to do.” Blueblood explained.
“But that would mean the-“
“Team I assembled won’t work out and the elements won’t be ‘restored’ because she’s going to do it alone unlike Twilight who relies on her team leading skills to get the job done.” Blueblood interrupted. “Thankfully Twilight took the bait when she had the chance.”
“But why Twilight and convicts? Why not other ponies who’re more capable and trustworthy?” She asked.
“She deserves a chance; they deserve a chance.” He answered. “Everypony does.”
“You’re just doing it for Twilight aren’t you?” Cadance asked.
“Maybe.” Blueblood shrugged.
“And what if she fails?” She asked as she began to walk away. “And what if she ditches you again?”
“She won’t.” He answered plainly. “And I know you bear a grudge against her. But please Cadence, learn to have a little more faith, it might get you somewhere.”
“Fine… fine.” Cadence said as she stopped and turned around to face the prince. “But if something bad happens. It’s on you Blueblood and your bureau, not me.” B
My Little Convicts - Crime is Magic
Chapter 3 - The Red Carpet
Chapter 3 - The Red Carpet
“All right everypony, I want to thank you again for choosing RBI touring services,” The pilot jokingly announced to her passengers as she flew her helicopter across the night sky. “Please remember to fasten your seatbelts and please refrain from overreacting to any slight turbulence that might occur, like this,” She said as she made a sharp left turn.
“AHHHHHHHHHH! ” Rarity screamed as she grabbed Applejack, the smuggler winced as she felt the tightness of her grip.
“Cut that shit out, Lightning Dust!” Flash ordered as he checked the buckle of his seatbelt.
“Just giving them a taste of what’s about to come Flashy,” Lightning Dust chuckled. “I wouldn’t really expect Nightmare Moon to roll the red carpet on us.”
“Just keep us flying and we’re good,” Flash replied. “Also, stop calling me Flashy, its fucking annoying.”
“Will do Captain Flashy!”
Rainbow Dash giggled. “Flashy huh, that’s a cute nickname.”
“Quit it!” Flash shouted causing both Dash and Dust to giggle harder. “Uhhh, this is gonna be long ride.”
“Oh yeah!” Dust remembered something. “Hey Flash,” Lightning Dust said as she turned her head around.
“What is it?” Flash grumbled.
“Are you uhhh…” Dust paused. “…free this weekend?”
“Eyes front Dust, this isn’t exactly the time for that.”
“Alright!” Dust replied as she went back to piloting. “But if you are, feel free to see me. I got two tickets to Countess Coloratura’s concert in Canterlot this weekend. I think you’re the kind of pony who could use a break.”
“I’ll think about it,” The field agent replied as he looked at Twilight who was busy reading the file that Blueblood gave her. ‘What’s the deal between the director and her anyway, ’ He wondered “Hey Twilight! Hey!” He called her attention.
The purple unicorn didn’t respond and continued reading. Flash called again but he got the same reaction. ‘Well looks like I have to resort to name calling ,’ He thought to himself. “Hey Grapeface!” Flash shouted at the purple unicorn.
“What the fuck did you just call me?” Twilight asked as her eyes twitched.
“Great! Now that I have your attention, I want to ask you something,” Flash said as he leaned closer. “Is there anything between you and Director Blueblood.”
“If your implying a romantic relation between us, you’re terribly mistaken,” Twilight answered him. “Though we were friends when we were in Celestia’s school for gifted unicorns,” Twilight began to chuckle as memories of her time in Celestia’s school began to flood her mind.
“Seems like you two had a lot of fun back then,” Flash said as he tried to recall his own school days in Cloudsdale.
“I just remembered how he used to turn down some of our gold-digging classmates,” She sighed as she went on a trip to memory lane. “He used to play it nice at first, then he puts on his trademark pompous façade and he begins to make said gold-digger’s life a living hell,” She smiled as she leaned on her seat.
“Hey Dust, remember that time when we stole the principal’s wig?” Flash asked the pilot.
“Yeah, the look on his face makes the one-week detention worth it,” Dust sighed. “Thing were a lot simpler back then.”
Flash turned to inspect the rest of the team. Most of them were dozing off with the exception of Twilight and Applejack. ‘Can we really do this?’ He thought to himself. ‘What chance do we have against a God?’ He looked at Twilight and asked her a question. “Are you sure the uh… Elements of Harmony can defeat Nightmare Moon?”
“It sent her to the moon once, it could probably do so again. All we have to do is to get there grab the elements and blast that bitch to smithereens,” Twilight answered. “If we make it there before our idiot of a pilot crashes us.”
“What the fuck did you just say about me…” Dust turned her head to face Twilight and looked her in the eyes. “… you motherfucking pinhe-”
“Enough!” Flash silenced Dust. “I know where this is going Dust, we talked about this.”
“She started it,” Dust reasoned.
“I know,” Flash replied. “But there’s no need to make an ass of yourself because of it.”
“Fine!” Dust said as she turned her focus on piloting the helicopter.
“Twilight was criticizing Dust’s piloting skills necessary?” Flash asked.
“Not really,” Twilight answered. “But she doesn’t really look like RBI material.” Dust can be heard grumbling from her cockpit.
“Don’t worry Twilight, Dust over here’s the best helicopter pilot a PJ can ask for,” Flash proudly proclaimed.
“Aww shucks Flash!” Dust said. “Stop it, you’re making me blush.”
“Hey, it’s true you know,” Flash replied.
“PJ?” Twilight asked.
“Equestrian Air Force Pararescue. I used to be one of em, Dust here was my heli pilot,” Flash explained. “I jump in the shithole known as the combat zone and pull someponies unlucky ass out of it. Saved a lot of lives back in the middle east before we decided to join the RBI.”
“You’re a soldier?” Twilight asked.
“Was a soldier,” Flash answered. He reflected on what happened during his time as a PJ. All the missions he took, the lives he saved, the friends he lost. He began to shake the troubling memories from his head. He looked around the chopper for a distraction and saw Applejack sitting quietly staring at the window. “Yo Applejack!” He called. “Why the long face.”
“I’m just thinking about stuff,” The city mare answered.
“Wanna talk about it?”Twilight asked.
“Yeah,” Applejack answered as he faced Flash. “It’s just… you see I grew up in Ponyville but I moved to Manehattan when I was eight. And well… I didn’t really expect I’d return at a time like this. When… when Ponyville burns.”
“Do you have a family there?” Flash asked.
“Yeah… I got a brother, a little sister and I’m not sure if granny’s still alive,” Applejack answered. “I just hope they’re sa-”
“Holy shit! ” Dust shouted. “It really is on fire. Look at this shit guys wake up,” Dust woke the others she began to fly closer to the smoldering ruins of Ponyville.”
“Sweet Celestia,” Twilight said as she gazed on the town.
“Those bastards!” Applejack shouted.
“Why Ponyville?” Rarity asked as tears began to fall from her eyes. “The ponies here didn’t do anything wrong.”
“That’s life Rarity,” Dr. Pinkie said as she placed a comforting hoof at the mare’s shoulder. “Sometimes the fucker decides to squeeze the lemon instead of handing it out.”
“Why does my chest feel heavy?” Rainbow Dash asked as she gripped her aching chest.
“Ohhhh, prettyyyy!” The drug induced Fluttershy said as her eyes dilated at the sight of the burning town.
Flash felt raw untainted anger at what he saw. This wasn’t the first time he saw something like this but it always felt the same every time he did. He can still hear their screams. “That bastards will pay… I’ll make her pay,” He muttered under his breath.
“She has an army of delusional cultists Flash,” Twilight said. “You sure you can take them all on by yourself?”
“…”
“Listen everypony!” Twilight addressed her crew. “To some of you this job’s personal and while the rest consider this a ticket to freedom. But remember we’re in this together and so stick to the plan and don’t be a hero, do we have that clear?”
“Yes ma’am!” They all shouted.
“RPG!” Dust shouted as she made a hard right turn and narrowly avoided the projectile.
“We’re gonna die! ” Rarity screamed.
“Oh fuck, OH FUCK, OH FUCK! ” Applejack shouted as she closed her eyes.
“Aw fuck they have stingers!” Dust said as she looked at the flashing dials. “Hold on everypony!” She said as she waited for the right time before- “Releasing flares!” She shouted as she released the choppers countermeasure making the stinger’s missile miss.
“RPG salvo at 9 o-clock!” Flash shouted.
“I’m on it,” She said as she leaned the chopper backward evading the RPG’s which were inched away from the cockpits windshield.
“Hold on, we got another stinger!” Dust once again released another salvo of flares to ward off the stingers. “Where the fuck are they coming from?”
“They’re coming from the forest below Twilight said as she leaned towards the window.”
“We got another stinger,” Dust released the flares once more but this time none was released. “Oh fuck.” She looked back to the passenger’s cabin. “I’m out of flares. Brace yourselves, she’s gonna hit.”
The missile slammed into the helicopters side near the cockpit, tearing a hole and most of the sending glass and metal shard flying towards the pilot. Twilight’s seatbelt broke and she was about to be sucked out when Flash grabbed her hoof. “I got you!” He shouted.
‘You can do this Dust,’ Dust thought while she wiped blood away from the windshield as blood began to trickle from her forehead. She scanned the area for a site to land the chopper. They were currently above the Everfree so there wasn’t much room for a landing and her vision has begun to blur. ‘There…’ She thought as she spotted a small clearing nearby. ‘Just a little more… need to make… it safely…’ She was able to land the chopper down gently in the forest clearing despite the damage it had taken.
“We made it!” Twilight shouted as she stood up. “I can’t believe it! We’re alive,” She gleefully shouted as she slithered out of the hole on the choppers side and hugged the ground. The others passengers hastily exited the damaged aircraft and while most of them were in a state of shock they were all miraculously unharmed.
“See! I told you Dust could get us-” Flash sentry paused when he saw blood splattered at the windshield of the cockpit. “Dust!” He rushed towards the cockpit’s door and opened him. He saw Lighting Dust’s limp body covered in blood and slumped on the controls. She had injuries all over her neck, temple and side as well as a nasty cut on her left front hoof, but despite the damage she had taken she was still breathing.
“No, no, no, no, NO! ” Flash dragged her out of the cockpit and laid her on the ground as he removed her shattered helmet used his wings to place pressure on the cut in her leg. “What are you all standing there for!? Do something!” He shouted at the rest of the ponies. Applejack rushed to the chopper to search for a first aid kit.
Rarity was about to do the same until Twilight stopped her with a hoof. “We need to go.”
“I’m not going anywhere. Not without her,” Flash said as he checked Dust’s pulse. “I need bandages,” That was when flash got an idea from an earlier conversation. “Twilight, you went to magic school right? Do you now any healing spells?”
“Flash we need to go, the cultists know we’re here and they’re probably on their way,” Twilight argued.
“I’m siding with Twilight on this one.” Dr. Pie said as she walked over to Flash. “We need to go.”
“I found it.” Applejack shouted as she came running back with a med kit on her hooves.
“She just saved your asses,” Flash said as he pointed a free hoof at the wrecked chopper. “Do you know any pilot that could fly a chopper in that condition while badly injured and still land it safely,” Flash faced Twilight and looked her straight in the eye. “If so, then I’ll gladly leave her here to die.”
Twilight was about to turn around in annoyance when Rainbow Dash’s hoof stopped her. “He has a point Twilight.”
Twilight looked at the chopper and then at Dust’s unconscious body. ‘Yeah I guess I do owe her one, ’ He trotted towards Flash and looked at him straight in the eye with a blank expression on her face. “Fine, I know a set of spells that can help.”
Flash’s expression of anger and worry was replaced by a childlike face of joy as he jumped and hugged Twilight. “Thank you!”
“All right,” Twilight grunted as she pushed Flash away. “Step aside I’ll handle this,” She immediately set to work on removing the shard buried inside the poor mare. The others watched in awe as she skillfully took out the pieces using her telekinesis while she keept the blood from flowing out with a blood vessel sealing spell. She then took out a needle and thread from the kit and began swiftly stitching the cut’s. After it was done she applied the antiseptics and ordered Rarity and Applejack to bandage up Dust. “She’s gonna make it. I just hope w-”
“SHhh,” Flash shushed Twilight and everypony stopped except for AJ and Rarity. “Someone’s coming.”
Hoofsteps can be heard from the bushes in the side of the clearing. Flash drew his revolver and pointed it at the bush. “RBI step out of the bush with your hooves in the air!”
“Hold it right there partner,” A big red stallion roughly twice as big as any of them stepped out of the Bush. “I didn’t mean you no harm.”
Applejack looked at the stallion and thought to herself. ‘Could it be? No it can’t be. ’
“Identify yourself,” Flash ordered.
“Big Macintosh, Ponyville Town Watch,” The stallion replied with a deep western accent. “I say your chopper get shot down, thought I’d find some survivors to bring back to the farm.”
“Big Mac!” Applejack shouted as she stood up. “It is you!”
“Applejack?” Big Mac said as he looked in shock. “Applejack!” He shouted as they rushed and hugged each other.
“Is Granny and Apple Bloom safe?” Applejack asked as she pulled away.
“They’re safe Applejack. They’re in the farm with the rest of survivors from the attack,” He answered. “And what happened to your voice, you sound like a city slicker.”
“Probably because I am one,” Applejack answered.
“Ahem!” Twilight coughed. “Care to explain?”
“This fella right over here is my older brother, he runs the family farm, Sweet Apple Acres,” Applejack explained.
“Eeyup!” Big Mac said.
“There! All done,” Rarity said as she finished bandaging Dust. “Like I actually needed your help Applejack!” She said sarcastically.
“Did you say survivors?” Flash asked.
“Eeyup!” Big Mac answered. “Those who weren’t killed when Nightmare Moon and her gang attacked. They’re taking shelter in our farm.”
“Oh thank God,” Flash sighed with relief ‘At least it didn’t end like last time, ’ He thought to himself. “Can you bring our pilot to the farm, she’s badly hurt,” Flash said as he pointed a bloodstained wing at Dust’s unconscious body.
“Eeyup!” Big Mac said as he walked over to the mare and settled her in his back. “Let’s get going then,” He was about to trot back to the farm when he turned around and asked them. “You coming?” He asked.
“We’ll pass,” Flash said as he checked the cylinder of his revolver. “We got business to take care of.”
“Good luck then,” Big Mac said as he trotted away. “Oh and by the way,” He said as he tossed a rolled up lasso to Applejack. “I think you’ll be needing this.”
“Fuck yeah!” She shouted as she caught the lasso. “Say hi to Apple Bloom and Granny for me?” Applejack shouted as his brother disappeared in the treeline.
Flash walked back into the chopper and went inside the cockpit.
“What are you doing?” Twilight asked.
“Searching for stuff that could help us,” Flash answered as he found a lever and used it to open a compartment below the pilot seat. “Dust likes to hide stuff in her… holy shit!” he said as he smiled pulled out an M14 rifle from the hidden compartment.
“Whoa!” Dash said as she looked at the gun. “Cool gun.”
“Flash… no,” Twilight said. “We talked about guns an-” She stopped when she saw Flash pull out a hand gun from the compartment ‘Great! ’ She thought. ‘Just great, more guns! ’
“We’re gonna need all the firepower we can get,” He said as he pocketed several other items from the stash. “And I got an M14 with and extra mag as well as this Five-Seven pistol.”
“Don’t forget your revolver,” Twilight grunted.
“We should get going,” He said as he exited the cockpit and cocked his rifle. “It won’t be long before they find us.”
“But first.” Twilight said. “Where the buck are we.”
“Hold on a sec,” Dash said as she began to search the chopper for something. “Found it!” She said as she walked out holding a bundle of maps, a compass, markers and a notebook. She set took the map of the Everfree and tossed out the rest as she began using the instruments to search for their exact location. She began to measure stuff and noted other things in her notebook. “I got it!” Dash shouted gleefully.
“Where are we then?” Twilight asked.
“We’re lost.” Dash answered as she threw away her stuff.
“You don’t know what you were doing don’t you?”
“Yeah.”
“Actually…” Flash said. “We’re not lost, there’s a trail that heads straight to the ruins not far from here.”
“How’d you know?” Applejack asked.
“GPS.” Flash answered as he showed them his GPS.
“Why didn’t you say you had one?” Dash asked.
“You interrupted me before I did.”
“Wait!” Dr. Pie interrupted. “Has anypony seen Fluttershy?”
“Uhhh…. No.” Twilight answered.
“I have no idea.” Rarity answered.
“Hey guys!” Fluttershy greeted them gleefully as she approached them riding a manticore that had a frizzled mane and bloodshot eyes. The mares screamed as they ran and hid behind Flash’s back as he pointed his gun at the beast.
“Back off beast!” Flash shouted as he pointed his rifle as the creature.
“Chill out guys, Henry’s not gonna hurt you isn’t that right Henry,” She said as she rubbed the manticore’s back.
“Henry?” They all asked as the same time.
“I sensed that some creature was having a nasty case of withdrawal when we landed so I followed the trail, found Henry and eased his pain with some ‘sugar’,” Fluttershy explained.
“Wait, what withdrawal?” Twilight asked. “Did you give that Manticore drugs.”
“Of course!” Fluttershy answered. “I gave him Meth because he was suffering from its withdrawal effects.”
“Now that I remember it,” Flash said as he looked at Twilight. “I heard from a fellow agent that they lost a lot of good ponies fighting off Miss Fluttershy’s drug crazed animals when they set out to arrest her.”
“Oh dear!” Applejack commented.
“Anyway, Henry said we can take a ride on his back,” Fluttershy smiled
“He won’t bite us right?” Dash asked as she approached the manticore slowly.
“Don’t worry he knows you’re friends,” Fluttershy said as the manticore let out a groan that clearly showed how much it was suffering from its addiction. The creature sniffed and roared at Flash who whimpered in fear like a little colt.
“Bad Henry!” Fluttershy slapped the manticore’s head. “Flash is a friend,” Shee turned to flash and apologized. “Sorry, he really dislikes the RBI.”
“OK….” Flash replied.
“Beats walking,” Twilight said as she hopped in the creature’s back.
“This is going to be a ‘very’ long walk,” Flash said.
My Little Convicts - Crime is Magic
Chapter Five - Carpe Diem
The quiet darkness of the catacombs of The Castle of the Two Sisters was broken by two unicorns that ran along it’s halls. One of them a purple unicorn was holding a map that showed the outline of the catacombs while the other was a white unicorn that was shivering in freight as she maintained a light spell.
“Turn right!” Twilight shouted as the pair made a sharp right turn.
“Twilight are you sure this plan will work?” Rarity asked.
“It will!” Twilight confidently answered as she stopped in front of a crossroads. She took a quick look at the map before making up her mind. “Left,” She commanded. “Now hurry up!”
“How will we get out of this place anyway?” Rarity asked.
“The same way we entered it,” Twilight answered. “But this time we’re gonna teleport to the castles interior.”
“Are you sure they’re alright?” Rarity asked as she struggled to keep up with Twilight.
“What, Fluttershy and the others?” Twilight responded. “I’m pretty sure a buttload of drug crazed animals is enough to match up to whatever those cultists have.”
------[T]/------
Meanwhile above ground on the castles courtyard a large battle was underway. On one side were the grossly underprepared cultists of Nightmare Moon, on the other was a hoard of rampaging animals led by Fluttershy who was standing atop an elephant head while spearing any cultist foolish enough to approach.
“Behind you!” Flash shouted as he shot a pegasus cultist that was behind Fluttershy. Flash was sitting on the back of a Giraffe that was violently flailing its head to incoming cultist bearing lances and swords.
The attack was going as planned. The fifty plus drug crazed animal that Fluttershy rallied has taken the cultists defenses completely by surprise. They didn’t even had time to react to an assault of such scale. And soon they realized that their firearms, which consisted mostly of SMG’s, were ineffective against the large animals.
“Yee-Haw!” The rhino riding Applejack shouted as she tossed her lasso at a cultist before pulling it sending the poor mare flying straight to the horns of her ride impaling her. “If we keep this up they’ll all be dead before Twilight even gets the elements.”
“Pinkie! You’re up,” Flash signaled as he spotted a Humvee with a fifty caliber gun mounted on its roof rushing towards them.
“I’m on it! Let’s go Mr. Peaches” Dr. Pie shouted as she led a troop of five angry silverback gorillas on a charge. The largest of the troop made a head on collision with the vehicle while three of them ripped open the doors and pulled out the passengers. The fifth gorilla Mr. Peaches, who was carrying Dr. Pie climbed on top of the Humvee and decapitated the gunner before he could fire a shot. “Brutal!” Pinkie commented as she watched the headless body spray blood everywhere like a red fountain.
Flash scanned the tree line and saw two trucks carrying cultists that were holding RPG’s ‘It’s them! ’ He thought to himself. “Rainbow Dash now!”
Rainbow Dash immediately flew out of the trees carrying two large bags filled with angry meth crazed squirrels. She dropped each bag on the two truck and watch the squirrels attack the surprised passengers and drivers. “That’s what you get for shooting our chopper down!” She shouted as she watched one of the trucks crash onto one another causing a violent explosion. “WOOOHOO! Just like in the movies.”
“Do you think Rarity and Twilight are okay?” Applejack asked Flash.
“I don’t know!” Flash shouted as he shot another cultist with his rifle. “We just have to trust Twilight’s plan and we’ll get through this.”
------[T]/------
“We’re here!” Twilight huffed as she struggled to catch her breath.
“What now?” Rarity asked as she wiped the sweat from her forehead.
“Well, if the plans are correct, we should be several floors directly below the main hall,” She said as she looked at the map before folding and tucking it back into the file. “I hope this works.”
“What are we going to do exactly?” Rarity asked.
“Just watch,” Twilight said as she began drawing a large sigil on the crypts ceiling with her magic. “Stand back!” She shouted as she ‘ignited’ the sigil causing it to glow violently red.
“What is that?!” Rarity asked as she stepped back a few paces.
“That is a Shaped-Charge Sigil,” Twilight said. “And if my calculations are correct the stand of the elements should be directly ab-”
The sigil exploded upwards before Twilight could finish her sentence. The explosion went up several floors crossing the dungeon, the guard quarters and the armory before tearing a hole on the main halls floor causing the elements to fall down to the crypt.
Twilight watched as five black stone balls crashed into the floor in front of them. “There it is!” She said as she rushed to one of the stones. “Oh no, he was right,” Twilight said as she opened the file Blueblood gave him. “Rarity we’re fucked.”
“What do you mean?” Rarity asked as she looked at the stones. “Are… are those the elements?”
“They’re at a dormant state,” Twilight said as she picked up all five with her magic. “And the sixth one is still missing.”
“Well then how the fuck are we going to defeat Nightmare Moon now?!” Rarity asked.
“I was kinda hoping the file Blueblood gave me was wrong when it said that the elements were dormant.” Twilight said as she placed the stones on the ground. “We have them now though. Let’s see here, generosity, kindness, laughter, loyalty and honesty. It’s mentioned in the files that there was a sixth one, but that’s as far as the information goes.”
“Maybe if we can bring all six together the elements will awaken from its dormant state,” Rarity said. “But where is the sixth element?”
“I know where we can find answers,” Twilight replied as she picked up the stones once more. “There’s a large archive here that may give us a clue on where to find it,” Twilight said as she began running. “Come on, there’s an exit that leads straight to it not far from here.”
“Whatever!” Rarity replied. “The sooner we’re out of this crypt the better,” She said as she followed Twilight.
They ran across the dark halls once more. Twilight stopped and looked at her map before she looked at Rarity and said. “All right Rarity, follow my lead and make the jump on three.” She said as she charged her horn. “Three… two… one!” She said as a bright flash of light surrounded both of them and then they were gone.
“Where are we?” Asked Rarity who casted a light spell to illuminate her surroundings. They were at what seems to be the readers lounge of the castle’s library.
“We’re at the castle library Rarity,” Twilight said as she browsed on the books stacked in the shelves. “Now quit standing there and help me out will you.”
Rarity walked towards the shelf Twilight was browsing when she heard clapping coming from one of the sofa’s in the lounge behind them. “I wish to complement you on such an outstanding plan! ” A diabolical voice said.“I never thought anypony would ever use the castle’s underground catacombs to breech the castle’s defenses in order steal the elements. ”
“Twilight!” Rarity whimpered.
“I know,” Twilight replied. “We’re not alone aren’t we.”
“Precisely! ” A voice answered from the darkened corner of the room.
“Well I’ll be dammed!” Twilight chuckled. “If it isn’t the manifestation of darkness itself. What brings you to our… quiet nation, Nightmare Moon!” Twilight said as she turned around to face the dark alicorn who was sitting quietly on a couch.
“Nightmare Moon!” Rarity gasped as she intensified the light of her spell in order to get a better look at their target.
“That… pitiful display won’t be necessary my little pony, ” Nightmare Moon said as she looked at rarity’s poor excuse for a spell. “Allow me! ” She said as she lighted all torch scones in the library simultaneously.
“Shall we get to business?” Twilight said as she charged her horn causing it to glow violently purple.
“Let’s not rush this conversation my dear unicorn, ” She said calmly as she stood up to her full height towering over them like an oaken tree. “First, allow me to formally introduce myself. I am Nightmare Moon, Queen of the night and the rightful ruler of Equestria. ”
“I’m Twilight Sparkle, master thief, criminal mastermind and only daughter of Duchess Twilight Velvet Sparkle,” Twilight introduced herself. “And I am here to send you back from where you came, mongrel!”
“Oh and I’m uhh… Rarity!” Rarity whimpered as she slowly backed away. “And I think I’m not supposed to be here.”
“Run off then little pony, ” Nightmare Moon said as she looked at the shivering mare. “Run off while I still offer you my mercy, ” Without a word, Rarity stormed out of the library tripping several times but never looking back.
“Rarity! Come back here,” Twilight shouted at her friend but to no avail, she was already gone. “Motherfucker!” She grumbled as she settled at an aggressive stance. “So, are we gonna do this or what.”
“Fighting can wait, I wish to speak further with you, ” Nightmare Moon said as her horn glowed. “But not here, I know a better place for such a conversation. ” She said as a dark blue light covered Twilight and the five elements.
“Wait where are you taking me?” She said as she, the five elements and Nightmare Moon began to float as her horn glowed even brighter.
“To the… ‘ negotiating’ room. ” Nightmare Moon answered as they disappeard.
------[T]/------
“So… from what I remember Twilight told us to ‘distract’ the cultists,” Flash said as he looked at a cultist’s corpse. “And I’m pretty sure ‘distract’ doesn’t mean slaughter them all mercilessly.”
“Yeah… I think we might have overdone it.” Rainbow Dash said as she gazed over the castles courtyard. It was littered with dead bodies of both beast and cultist.
The battle ended as quickly as it started. In the end the cultist’s who were taken by surprise were defeated even when they were numerically superior. Those that didn’t either ran away or retreated into the castle.
But the battle came with a cost for the attackers, for only twelve animals survived the fighting. And only seven out of the twelve survivors will make it. The ponies of Twilight’s crew were unharmed though, thanks to the ‘armor’ the RBI supplied them with. They only managed to get a few bruises from the fight.
“Your sacrifice will never be forgotten,” Fluttershy said as she cradled the head of a dying gorilla. “You won’t die for nothing Mr. Peaches, I promise it.”
“I pinkie promise it Mr. Peaches!” Pinkie said as she held back her tears. “Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!” She shouted as she jabbed a cupcake in her eye.
“We should go and meet Twilight at the rally point,” Applejack said as she placed a comforting hoof at Fluttershy’s shoulder. “This fight’s far from over.”
“Yeah, it’s time to end this,” Flash said as he checked his M14’s magazine. “Empty! Hey AJ, how much ammo do you have left?”
“I’m all out as well,” Applejack answered.
“Great!” Flash said as he dropped his rifle and checked his revolver’s cylinder. “And all I have left is three bullets.”
“Hey guys, I dunno if it’s because I’m high, but is that Rarity I see?” Fluttershy asked as she pointed at a white mare running towards them.
“Rarity what are you doing here?” Flash asked. “Wait, where’s Twilight?”
“Nightmare Moon!” Rarity shouted. “Nightmare Moon has her!”
“Well fuck,” Flash said. “Do you at least have the elements?”
“…”
“Rarity,” Applejack said. “Do you have the elements?”
“No… I kind of chickened out when Nightmare Moon appeared.” Rarity said.
“We are so fucked,” Flash said. “But the castles courtyard is cleared and the cultists are on the run. So I guess it’s time we call backup,” Flash said as he took out his phone.
“What are doing?” Dr. Pie asked.
“I’m calling the RBI.” Flash said. “They’re the only ones who can handle this now.”
“You do realize there’s no cellphone signal because we’re in the middle of a forest right!” Dr. Pie said. “Right?”
“…” Flash was silent for a moment. “FUCK! ” He shouted as he threw his phone over the horizon. “That’s it we’re busting her out. Where is she Rarity?”
“I left Twilight in the castle library,” Rarity said. “She might still be there.”
“Then that’s where we’ll look,” Flash replied as he began walking towards the castle with the rest of the group.
“She might still be there, but I’m certain she isn’t.” Dr. Pie said causing the group to stop and turn around to face her.
“Where is she then?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“If Nightmare Moon is the mare I think she is,” Dr. Pie said as she strolled casually. “Then she probably took Twilight to the heart of her evil lair in order to persuade Twilight to join her.”
“How’d you come up with that kind of assumption?” Dash asked.
“It’s what I would’ve done if I was in her shoes.” Dr. Pie answered plainly. “And believe me Dashie, I’ve been in her shoes a couple of times already.”
“Ohhhh right!” Dash said as she remembered. “The New World Order thing you had a while back.”
“So where is this ‘heart of her evil lair’ thing you’re talking about?” Flash asked.
“It could be anywhere actually,” Dr. Pie said. “But since she’s royalty. I bet that would be her throne room.”
------[T]/------
“Welcome to my throne room Twilight Sparkle! ” Nightmare Moon said as she lit all the torch scones of the room. The fire was color blue and gave off an intimidating aura. “So, what do you think? ”
“It’s too dark,” Twilight complained. “The entire room is too fucking dark, the carpet is venta black for fucks sake, the stained windows are tinted black, the fucking throne is black and you’re black!” Twilight ranted. “What the hell Nightmare Moon, where’s your creativity?”
“Silence! ” Nightmare Moon shouted. “Black is a beautiful color. It’s plain, it doesn’t sting the eyes for being too bright, it symbolizes my hatred for everybody and my love of the night. I like black. ”
“Uh-huh!” Twilight replied. ‘Celestia had to deal with this edgy thing. God, I almost feel sorry for her, ’ She thought to herself “So, where’s Celestia?”
“She’s inside me. ” Nightmare Moon said. She looked at Twilight only to see a mixed expression of confusion and disgust. “I absorbed her! Is something wrong about that? ”
“Nothing really it’s just…” Twilight trailed off. “…the way you said it kinda made it sound… a bit off.”
“Whatever! ” Nightmare Moon rolled her eyes. “About the thing I wanted to talk to you about. Will you join me? ”
“I’m sorry, what!” Twilight said in disbelief.
“Join me and together will shall unite Equestria under one banner. ” Nightmare Moon replied. “We sall unite it under the banner of the moon. ”
“All right! First of all, it’s already under one banner. Secondly, I am her to kill you,” Twilight said plainly. “And finally, why me out of all ponies?”
“Because I’ve seen what you’ve done Twilight, ” Nightmare Moon answered. “And I am impressed. All those schemes carried out under the cover of my darkness were among the best things I’ve seen in my thousand-year exile. And I have need of your skills right now. So I will say it again, will you join me. ”
“No!” Twilight answered plainly.
“What do you want then? ” Nightmare Moon ask. “I can give you anything, money, power and riches beyond your wildest imagination. ”
“My material needs are somewhat satisfied actually,” Twilight said. “If I ever get pardoned, I’ll still have enough money to spend the rest of my life living in comfort.”
“Hmm. If anything won’t satisfy you, perhaps somepony would. ” Nightmare Moon said as she grinned. “I know you want him Twilight. ”
“W-what do you mean.” Twilight said as she began to sweat. “I-uhh don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh come no Twilight, I’m not a fool, ” Nightmare Moon replied. “We both know you want him even though you’ll never get him because he only sees you as a friend. But I can fix that. ”
“There is nothing between us okay!” Twilight shouted as she blushed profusely. “And besides, what made you think I like him anyway.”
“I see what you do at night Twilight. In fact, I see everything during the night as well as the dreams of those who sleep. ” Nightmare Moon explained. “That means I’ve seen all your perverted dreams about your dear prince charming. ”
“What!” Twilight said as her face grew redder than a tomato.
“And don’t even get me started at what you do in alone in bed at night. ” Nightmare Moon said as she made a wicked smile. “Ah yes. All those lonely nights under the sheets with nothing but your perverse thoughts of him as run your hoof along your- ”
“Enough!” Twilight snapped. “I’ve heard enough!”
“Don’t you want your fantasies to be real? ” Nightmare Moon asked. “I can make him like you, you know all I need is a bit of my dark magic and he’s yours. ”
“You know what I’d really like.” Twilight said as she lifted the five dormant elements. “I’d like your cold dead body scattered all over the floor bitch.”
Nightmare Moon didn’t reply. Instead, she blasted the five stone balls with a single blast of her magic. “It’s a shame really. You would’ve made a great lieutenant. ”
“The elements!” Twilight said as she looked at the shattered bits of stone scattered across the marble floor. “No…” she whimpered.
“Well, my little pony. I guess it’s time to die. ” Nightmare Moon said as her horn began to glow. “Goodbye! ” Just then the throne room’s door burst open as Twilight’s crew scrambled in.
“Twilight!” Flash shouted as he saw Twilight about to be blown up. He charged in like a flash of light out of pure instinct and pushed Twilight out of the Dark Queen’s line of fire. The ensuing blast blew off the agent’s right front leg and sent him flying across the room hitting the wall with a force that it crippled his right hind leg.
“Flash!” Twilight shouted as she and the rest of her crew rushed to their fallen comrade as Nightmare Moon let out a diabolical laugh.
Twilight checked Flash’s injuries, it was serious. The pegasus struggled to stay conscious and was breathing heavily. His entire right front leg has been completely blown off but wasn’t bleeding because of the burns that sealed his wound. He also had a compound fracture in his hind leg and he has sustained cuts and bruises all over his body.
“Why?!” Twilight asked.
“Because…” He coughed out blood. “you… won’t get… out of the… fucking way.” He said before losing consciousness.
“What now Twilight?” Applejack asked. Twilight didn’t answer she stared at the ceiling.
“Where are the elements?” Dr. Pie asked. “Twilight answered me!” Pinkie shouted as she shook Twilight.
“They’re gone,” Twilight answered as tears rolled across her cheeks. “I failed, all is lost.”
“No!” Rarity shouted. “All is not lost.”
“Yeah you still have us.” Rainbow Dash said. “Who cares about the elements. As long as we have each other, we’ll make it through.”
It was at that moment when Twilight realized something. Rainbow Dash was right; they didn’t need the elements. They were the elements. “Rainbow Dash you are a genius!” She shouted.
“I am?” Dash asked.
“Foolish ponies! ” Nightmare Moon said as she charged her horn once more. “At least you’ll die together! ”
“No! We have the elements bitch,” Twilight said. “We are the elements!”
“I’m sorry, what? ” Nightmare Moon asked as she cocked a brow.
“Fluttershy who showed a lonely beast compassion even in his final moments represents the spirit of kindness.” She said as a pink light enveloped Fluttershy.
“Applejack who reassured me in doubt when I was in danger represents the spirit of honesty.” She said as an orange light enveloped the city mare.
“Dr. Pinkie Pie who banished her worries by laughing in the face of danger represents the spirit of laughter.” She said as a blue light enveloped the pink pony.
“Rarity who showed generosity through uhh… manipulation represents the spirit of generosity.” Just ten a purple light enveloped the mare who screamed in fright.
“Rainbow Dash who showed complete devotion to his crew and cause represents the spirit of loyalty.” She said as a red light enveloped the former minion.
“Flash Sentry who never gave a second thought about risking his life for other ponies… is dead.” She said as the injured stallion groaned. “Dying,” Twilight corrected.
After Twilight finished her speech, the light which covered her friends faded away revealing them wearing necklaces which beard the elements that took form in the shape of their cutie marks.
“You’re still missing a sixth element Sparkle! ” Nightmare Moon shouted as she prepared to attack.
“No we are not!” Twilight replied. “I represent the final element. The element of magic!” She said as a golden crown that beard a six sided magenta star appeared on her head. ‘Isn’t that the tick mark on my cutie mark. ’ Twilight thought to herself as she recalled her cutie mark which was a check list that had tick marks similar to the gem on her crown.
“All right then. Give me your best shot! ” Nightmare Moon challenged.
A rainbow colored light covered the six before blasting Nightmare Moon. The resulting hit caused a blinding white flash that temporarily blinded the six.
“It’s over,” Twilight said as the light faded. “It’s done!”
The six cheered at their victory before they heard a familiar laugh. “Do you really think I don’t have a counter for that. ”
“Oh no,” Twilight said as she looked at Nightmare Moon who was covered in a black tinted bubble shield.
“One thousand years on the moon, ” Nightmare Moon said. “One thousand fucking years spent to creat a spell that could block Equestria’s most powerful artifacts. ”
“Again!” Twilight ordered as they sent another rainbow blast that was as ineffective as the first one.
“Oh, I can do this all day long. ” The wicked mare laughed. “Can you? ”
“We can’t do it Twilight!” Applejack said.
“We have to try again,” Twilight replied. “I won’t stop until we win.”
“Feel free to try then. ” Nightmare Moon taunted.
The sound of a gunshot ran across the room as Nightmare Moon stopped a .357 bullet mid-air with her telekinesis. Flash Sentry was sitting on the floor with his back rested on the wall as he fired another shot at the mare, it missed. ‘Last one! ’ He thought to himself before he felt his gun slip away from his left hoof. It was pulled inside the wicked mares bubble shield.
“A finely crafted weapon! ” Nightmare Moon said as she inspected the revolver. “I’m surprised you survived that pegasus. Too bad you’ll die by your own gun, ” She said as she pointed the revolver at Flash.
What happened next became the sixth and final time Lucky Lenny saved Flash’s life. Just as Nightmare Moon pulled the trigger, the gun exploded sending metal shrapnel straight into Nightmare Moons face and eyes. “AHHHH! ” The mare shouted as she lowered her shield and fired random blasts across the room.
“NOW!” Flash shouted as he looked straight into Twilight’s eyes.
Twilight and her crew charged and sent a rainbow colored flying straight towards the undefended mare. She screamed in agony as the light tore her apart piece by piece. “NOOOO! ” She screamed as a flash of light blinded everpony in the room.
When the light cleared there was a single white alicorn standing. “I am proud of you Twilight, you managed to do the one thing I could never achieve.” The alicorn said.
“Yeah I killed your sister for you,” Twilight said. “But I don’t do shit like that for free.”
“Killed! No Twilight, you saved her.” The alicorn mare said as she walked towards the pile of Nightmare Moons broken pieces. “Luna!” She called
A small blue alicorn dug herself out of the shattered remains. “Celestia?” The mare said as she looked at the white alicorn. “Celestia!” She said as she jumped and hugged her sister.
“I’m sorry Luna!” Celestia said as stears rolled down her eyes. “I couldn’t save you, I was too weak.”
“No sister, it was my fault,” Luna replied as she began to cry as well. “I was unable to fight the darkness, it took me and I couldn’t fight back.”
“It okay now Luna, the darkness will never take you again.” Celestia said as she looked at her sister’s eyes. “I promise.”
Twilight looked at the heartwarming reunion and remembered her own brother. Tears began to roll down her cheeks as she remembered how close they were.
“Twilight are you okay?” Dr. Pie asked.
“I’m fine.” Twilight said as she wiped the tears and pretended that she wasn’t crying.
“It’s okay to cry Twilight!” Pinkie reassured her. “It’s what keeps us equine.”
“Mission accomplished Twilight!” Said a lone stallion that was standing in the throne room’s doorway.
They all turned to see who it was and were surprised to see Prince Blueblood. Luna looked at Twilight who gave her a death glare causing her to whimper. ‘Don’t even think about it bitch! ’ Twilight told to Luna telepathically.
“Hey its Blueballs!” Rainbow Dash said as she pointed a hoof at the prince
“Blueblood!” Twilight greeted. “Was this another one of your grand schemes you majestic bastard?” She asked sarcastically.
“It wasn’t my idea actually; it was Cadence’s idea to restore the elements. But it was my plan that restored the elements and brought back the princess of the night.” Blueblood replied. “Me and Cadence have been pushing for Celestia to restore the elements for a while now. But auntie insisted that she could handle any threat the world can throw at her.”
“I can handle any threat,” Celestia said. “I just couldn’t bear having to hurt or kill Luna.”
“That was your weakness auntie,” Blueblood said. “That’s why you failed. And that is also why we need the elements. But thankfully, your old ‘student’ has brought it to us.”
“So this was all just a scheme to restore the elements and find new bearers for them?” Twilight asked.
“Exactly!” Blueblood answered.
“And you chose a bunch of criminals?” Celestia asked. “What are you trying to prove here Blueblood?”
“That I can make any plan work no matter how stupid the plan may sound.” Blueblood answered as he smiled.
“Are we free to go now?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“Yeah Blue, are they free to go?” Twilight asked as well. “And can I go back to my cell, since I know you’re not gonna let me go easily after what I did to Canterlot.”
“Blueblood, after all they have been through I believe you should release them,” Celestia said. “All of them, even Twilight.”
“I’m releasing all of you under a condition.” Blueblood said surprising everyone including Twilight and Celestia. “But first I want to ask all six of you? How would you like to serve the greater good?”
“Just get to the point Blue,” Twilight replied.
“I have six new identities for you.” The prince said as he handed out a folder to each of the six. “These are your new identities. As you may notice your names are the same but your backgrounds have been changed. I want you all to stay in Ponyville after it is rebuilt and reintegrate to society.”
“You want to reform us?” Twilight asked.
“You will also be asked from time to time, to take up the elements and use it to save the homeland.” Blueblood replied. “Think of this as a rehab and community service in one package. So what will it be?”
“Beats prison!” Dash said.
“I get to go back to my family’s farm! Fuck yeah,” Applejack smiled.
“Oh! I always wanted to be a party pony,” Pinkie said as she browsed her file.
“I’m in as well,” Rarity said.
“Animals! Yay,” Fluttershy said.
“What about you Twilight?” Blueblood asked.
“Hey, I wanna know something first,” Twilight said. “Why me?”
“Oh Twilight!” Blueblood said. “There’s nothing in this world that I wouldn’t do for my best friend. And besides your dad convinced me you could be more than just a common theif.”
‘Just as he was when he was younger, ’ Celestia thought to herself.
“Yeah… Best friend,” Twilight replied. She sighed internally. ‘Best friend’, the one word that stung her harder than any bullet.
“By the way,” Blueblood said as he scanned the room. “Where’s your handler.”
“He’s over there,” Fluttershy pointed to the wall where the injured Flash sat silently.
“He’s alive,” Blueblood said as he checked his pulse and inspected his wounds. “He’s barely alive. But he’ll make it.” He said as he injected him a syringe with a blue colored liquid.
“What’s gonna happen to him?” Twilight asked. “Will he still have a job when he wakes up.”
“Yes, I have the perfect job for him.” Blueblood said.
“And about that other favor Blue!” Twilight reminded the prince.
“Auntie, Twilight has a favor to ask you,” Blueblood said as he turned to Celestia.
“What is it little pony?” Celestia asked. “You did good by me and I shall do the same for you.”
“I want the egg,” Twilight said. “I’m gonna make sure that blasted thing doesn’t tick off another filly.”
“I’ll give it under the condition that you will make sure no harm comes to it,” Celestia replied. “Are these terms agreeable.”
“They are,” Twilight said as she extended a hoof and smiled. “Do we have a deal then?”
“We have!” Celestia replied as she shook Twilights hoof.
My Little Convicts - Crime is Magic
Epilogue - An Uncertain Future
Epilogue - An Uncertain Future
Two weeks after the Summer Sun Celebration
It was a cold and quiet night in Canterlot. It was at times like these when the downtown taverns and pubs were at full swing. A young pegasus stallion was sitting on one such pub. He took his tankard with his left hoof and downed it all in one sitting. “Another!” The stallion told the barkeep.
A middle aged unicorn stallion walked into the bar. He sat on the stool chair beside the young pegasus and asked for a beer of his own. “How’s your new leg doing Flash?”
“It’s uh… great.” Flash said as he took a sip from his tankard. “But it’ll never be as good as my old one. Can’t even aim properly with this damn thing,” He said as he lifted his prosthetic leg and placed it on the counter.
“I see,” The older stallion said as he drank his beer. “At least you still have a job though. I heard another SWAT pony was forced to retire after he lost both hind legs.”
“I guess you’re right Night Light,” Flash replied. “But my career’s at a dead end sir.”
“What do you mean?” Night Light asked the young stallion.
“Surveillance duty, that’s gonna be my new job,” Flash answered. “But in truth, I’m gonna be more of an over glorified baby sitter.”
“You’re the one assigned to watch over ‘them’?” Night Light asked.
“Yup!” Flash answered as he downed another mug. “I’m being posted in as a mailman while working undercover. I’m gonna move with the rest of them to Ponyville tomorrow.”
“How’s Twilight doing?” Night Light asked.
“She’s doing fine,” Flash answered. “She’s got friends now sir. And I have to say, she’s one hell of a mare.”
“That she is!” Night Light said as he smiled.
“Yeah!” Flash smiled back. “Cheers!” He said as they raised their tankards. “I’m gonna miss my days as a field agent.”
“You’re still a field agent Flash,” Night Light said. “Just not the ‘fun’ kind of field agent.”
Just then another pony entered the pub. “Hello there!” Twilight Sparkle greeted as she sat down beside Flash.
“Miss Sparkle,” Flash greeted. “What brings you to this… fine establishment?”
“Oh cut it out Flash,” Twilight chuckled. “I may be an aristocrat but I’m still a commoner at heart just like-.”
“Your mom!” Night Light interrupted.
“D-dad!” Twilight said as she realized she’s been sitting two seats away from her father.
“Hey sweetie!” Night Light greeted. “How’s life”
“Hi, and its uhh… going good… I guess” Twilight greeted. “Vodka please!” Twilight told the barkeep who was about to get a bottle before he was stopped by Night Light.
“No alcohol for the little filly,” Night Light said. “Just give her some milk.” He told the barkeep who placed a bottle of milk in front of Twilight. The other ponies in the bar began to laugh and chuckle at Twilight.
“Dad! I’m twenty-three years old!” Twilight complained. “You’re embarrassing me!”
“Hi twenty-three years old, I’m dad.” Night Light replied making Flash and other ponies giggle and laugh.
“Dad!” Twilight groaned. ‘He hasn’t changed one bit! ’ She thought to herself.
“No alcohol for you, young lady!” Night Light said as he took another sip from his tankard. “I don’t’ want you waking up in some stallions bed in the morning. But then again I don’t really expect you to still be pure.”
“Actually…” Twilight trailed off.
“Seriously?!” Night Light asked. “I don’t know what to say.”
“I never really had time for had time to search for a special somepony dad,” Twilight explained.
“What about your crush?” Night Light asked as he smiled mischievously. “I heard you two are friends again.”
“Dad!” Twilight shouted as she blushed.
“What crush?” Flash asked.
“Well you see, she used to have an infatuation with this one colt in school. His name is-”
“Don’t’ you fucking dare dad!” Twilight interrupted.
“Language!” Night Light scolded Twilight.
“Dad you promised!” Twilight huffed.
“Don’t worry sweetie I plan to keep that promise; I was just teasing you.” Night Light said. “But judging from how she used to talk dreamily about him, I say she had and might still have a massive crush on him,” He told Flash who tried to hold back his laughter but failed.
“Aww, Twilight that’s so cute.” Flash said.
“Dad stop!” Twilight said as she gritted her teeth.
“Nope!” Night Light replied with a smug smile as he drank his beer.
“I hate you!” She said. “That’s it I’m out,” She huffed as she stood up from her stool and walked out before walking back in to take the bottle of milk. “And I’m taking this!” And without another word, she was gone.
“Wow!” Flash said. “I never thought that side of her existed.”
“Yeah!” Night Light replied as he paid the barkeep for the milk. “That young mare is full of surprises.”
“Well its getting pretty late!” Flash said as he looked at his watch. “I have to go now sir; I have a big day tomorrow.” He said as he stood up from his stool chair and paid his bill. He walked out of the pub and began to walk home.
“Hey Flash!” Night Light called the young stallion. “I heard Luck Lenny saved you for the last time.”
“Yeah about that,” Flash said. “It kinda exploded when I was about to get shot with it.”
“Here take mine,” He said as he handed Night Light his gun. “I want you to have her.”
Flash inspected the gun. It was a chrome plated M911 pistol with the words ‘I make my own luck’ engraved on the barrel. “Thank you sir! I’ll keep it safe and I won’t let you down.”
“Keep her safe Flash, keep all of them safe!” Night Light said as he waved him goodbye while walking away. “And have a good night!”
“You too sir!” He said as he holstered his gun and began his long walk home.
Author's Note
That concludes my first story! I want to thank everyone who supported me while making this fic. I plan to create a series out of this that will follow the events of the cannon series that will have a 'criminal twist'. But there are other projects I want to work on so it might take a while before I do it.
My Little Convicts - Crime is Magic
Chapter 4 - A Long Walk
“Well, who would’ve thought that giving an entire kilogram of meth would kill a manticore,” Twilight sarcastically told Fluttershy as her crew stood before the grave of the manticore Henry, who died from cardiac arrest due to meth overdose. “And now are ride’s gone and we have to spend ten whole minutes burying said ride because yellow autism over hear wants to give him a decent farewell.”
“Geez Twilight!” Rainbow Dash said. “That’s a little too… much don’t you think.”
“Hey show him a little respect!” Fluttershy shouted surprising everyone. “Henry was a good manticore and was kind soul even when everypony wanted him dead. He never had anyone to call a family so I promised him I’ll be there for him until the end.”
“All right… alright!” Flash broke the fight. “I think we should get going.”
“Yeah, I bet the ponies that shot us down aren’t far,” Applejack agreed.
They then continued their journey on hoof this time and soon they were crossing what seemed to be small mountain’s Cliffside. While they were trotting Flash asked Twilight. “Weird isn’t it?”
“What do you mean?” Twilight whispered.
“Where are they?” He replied. “The cultists. We spent a good ten minutes at the heli’s crash site and another ten burying the manticore but we haven’t encountered a single one of them.”
“Then there’s a good chance we’re being followed,” Twilight said as her eyes scanned the tree line above the Cliffside. “Keep your eyes peeled.”
“Ohhhh pretty!” said Fluttershy as she gazed over to the forest overlooking the Cliffside.
“I know right!” Rarity replied. “You don’t get to see beautiful things like this in Manehattan.”
“Pretty Lights!” The drug induced mare pointed at a faint light heading towards them.
“Wait!” Rarity said. “What lights?”
“Lights?” Flash Sentry asked as he rushed to the edge of the cliff. “RPG!” He shouted as the projectile zipped past his head and slammed into the mountain side. The blast cause chunks of rock and a cloud of dust to fall down on Twilight’s crew. A large rock slammed on the ground beside Twilight causing the ground below her hooves to collapse. She was about to fall down with it until a hoof caught her.
“I got you!” Applejack said as she held on to Twilights hoof as she hanged over the cliff.
“Don’t let go!” Twilight shouted.
“Then don’t look down,” Applejack replied. She attempted to pull Twilight up, but to no avail. “Listen, Twilight. This may sound crazy, but I need you to let go!” She said as she looked at Twilight’s freighted eyes.
“What! ” Twilight shouted. “Why would I want to let go and die. No! No, no, no, no!”
“Trust me!” Applejack said. “Or we’re both going to die.” She continued as her hind hooves began to slide forward.
“Why?” Twilight asked as she tightened her grip on to Applejack’s hoof.
“Are you a pussy Twilight?” Applejack asked. “Because you look like you’re about to piss yourself.” Applejack chuckled.
“What! I’m no coward,” Twilight replied.
“Then why’re you too afraid to take a leap of faith?” Applejack asked.
“Fuck YOOOOUUUUU! ” Twilight shouted as she let go of Applejacks hoof and fell. She closed her eyes and screamed as she waited for the inevitable. But then she felt something catch her.
“Fuck you’re heavy!” A voice said.
Twilight opened her eyes and looked up to see Rainbow Dash carrying her. “What the?”
“You seriously thought we were gonna let you die,” Rainbow Dash grunted as she held on to Twilight.
“I… I don’t understand!” Twilight said still surprised that she’s alive.
“I know right!” Dash replied. “She’s a smuggler yet she told you the truth, this group is full of surprises!” Dash carried her until she finally dropped her when they were back on top. Twilight inspected the condition of her crew, they were all relatively fine except for Flash who had his left wing busted.
“You okay?” Twilight asked the agent.
“Yeah!” Flash replied. “Don’t worry, I’ve had worse,” He said as he looked at his wing.
“Hey Applejack!” Twilight called out.
“What?” Applejack asked.
“Thanks,” Twilight said. “For telling the truth.”
“No problem sugarcube,” She replied.
“Also, Fluttershy. Sorry for being a dick earlier, I hope you can forgive me,” Twilight said as she looked at the yellow mare.
“Oh it’s fine,” Fluttershy said. “There’s really no point in dwelling in the past. I forgive you.”
“Thank you,” Twilight said. ‘Twilight what are you doing!’ A voice in her head told her. ‘Do you remember why you decided to never have personal attachments to your crew! Do you really want to go over this again? ’ The voice continued.
“Are you okay Twilight,” Dr. Pie asked as she waved a hoof at Twilight’s face.
“What!” Twilight shouted. “Oh! I’m fine. Really! There’s nothing to worry about,” She said nervously.
“It’s the voices isn’t it?” Dr. Pie asked.
“Huh?” Twilight cocked a brow.
“Don’t worry I have them too,” She said. “Just remember. You don’t always have to do what they say.”
“Okay,” Twilight replied. “I’ll uh… keep it in mind.”
“All right ladies, I think it’s time to move,” Flash said. “We wouldn’t want to get hit like that again don’t we.”
“Okie-dokie-lokie!” Pinkie replied as she hopped along.
------[T]/------
While they were walking Flash trotted to Twilight’s side and handed her his Five-Seven pistol. “Here, I want you to take this.”
“What, no. You know how I feel about guns.” Twilight replied.
“I know about that.” Flash said. “It’s just… I feel like something bad is gonna happen to me. So I want you to have this just in case I fall.”
“Just give it to someone else,” Twilight said. “And Flash, you are not going to die, we’re going to make it through this, all of us are going to. I promise!”
“Okay,” Flash nodded. “But still I need another gunmare in this team just in case. Who would you trust with a firearm?” He asked.
“Give it to Applejack,” Twilight said.
“Huh!” Applejack said as she heard someone call her name. “Somepony calling me?”
“Here, take this,” Flash said as he handed Applejack the gun. “Twilight says she trusts you to carry a gun.”
“Thanks boss, I won’t let you down,” She said as she holstered her gun inside her suit.
“Hey Flash!” Dash called Flash. “Since you’re now giving out guns, can I have your .357?”
“What!” Flash said. “What makes you think I’ll just hand out Lucky Lenny.”
“Lucky Lenny?” Fluttershy asked.
“This is Lucky Lenny,” Flash said as he showed them his .357 revolver. “This is the luckiest gun in Equestria. I would’ve died on five separate occasions if weren’t for this gun.”
‘Oh God, he names his guns now! ’ Twilight thought to herself. ‘What’s next? I he gonna tuck them in bed and tell them a bedtime story. ’ She continued her line of thought.
Applejack was about to say something when she tripped. Her face fell flat on the ground that had some strange colored liquid in it. “It’s blood, sweet Celestia it’s blood!” She shouted when she looked at the hoof she wiped her face with.
Twilight casted a light spell to see what Applejack tripped on. To their horror it was a severed pony head that was wearing a royal guard helmet.
“AHhhHHHHhh!” Applejack screamed in horror while Rarity vomited on the floor.
Flash Sentry settled on an aggressive stance with his rifle. “Twilight I need some light.”
“I’m on it!” Twilight said as her horn glowed violently white. Twilight looked back at Flash who had a horrified look on his face as he starred upwards. “What’s the matter?” She asked before she looked up and gasped in horror. Hanging silently on the trees were about nineteen stallions in royal guard armor. They were motionless with eyes wide and tongues lolling out.
“My God,” Flash muttered. “It’s Celestia’s house guard, t-they’re all d-d-dead.”
“I guess you could say that these guys were… hanging out!” Fluttershy said. “Okay I’m going to shut up now.”
“I w-wanna go home!” Applejack cried. “I don’t wanna die!”
“Listen to me you’re not gonna die,” Twilight said. “We’re gonna make it out of this together.”
“Shh. Did you hear that?” Flash asked as he settled back into an aggressive stance. “We’re not alone.” He muttered as faint sounds of demonic laughter came from the forest around them. Soon after pairs of glowing eyes and a smile that could make your heart stop began appearing on the trees around them.
“We’re going to die!” Rarity screamed causing panic.
“Mommy!” Rainbow Dash cried as she curled into a ball.
Flash Sentry fires a three round burst at one of the trees before realizing that his attack was no use. He looked over at Twilight who was still in shock. “Twilight! What do we do.?” He asked receiving no reply. “Twilight what are we going to do?”
“I… I…” Twilight mumbled.
“Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!” Came a laugh from the darkness. “I say, what a marvelous display you have Nightmare Moon! I am appalled.” The voice said as she began to clap her hooves.
“Pinkie Pie!” Shouted Everyone in confusion.
“You guys seriously fell for this shit!” Dr. Pie said as she approached one of the trees while giggling creepily.
“Pinkie Pie stay away from that thing!” Twilight shouted as she attempted to rush towards pinkie before being stopped by Flash. She looked at Flash in confusion.
“Wait Twilight, look.” He pointed at Pinkie who was wiping the face off the tree with a handkerchief.
“Seriously guys!” Pinkie laughed. “It’s just paint see.” She said as she threw her hankie away.
“But-but-but- “
“You should learn to laugh at challenges before crying to them Dashie.” Pinkie interrupted Dash who was stuttering.
“So its fake right!” Applejack said. “Whew, I thought the bodies were real for a second there.” She laughed nervously.
Pinkie didn’t say a word, she walked over to the severed head and licked the blood red liquid. She smacked her lips and rolled her tongue before talking. “Nope! This is a real head alright.”
“W-what!” Applejack stuttered.
“And judging by the shit piles below those bodies, those are real corpses as well.” Pinkie said as she pointed at the piles of excrement below the corpses of Celestia’s house guard.
“I think I’m going to HRRGGGHH! ” Rarity vomited once more.
“Why does that corpse have three hind legs?” Dash nervously asked as she pointed at one of the hanging bodies.
“I think we should move.” Dr. Pie said as she began to push her friends away from the hanging bodies. “Before we discover things that… shouldn’t be discovered.”
------[T]/------
They continued their journey before they eventually stopped in front of a wide river. They couldn’t cross it because of the thundering rapids that could easily drown them.
“I can fly to the other side,” Dash said as she inspected the river. “But what about you guys?”
“Well shit!” Flash said. “Guess you’ll have to carry us one by one.”
“There has to be another way to get to the other side,” Twilight said as she scanned the river. She spotted a large silhouette in the distance. “Wait a minute, is that a sea serpent I see? Dash can you go check?”
“On it boss!” Dash saluted before she flew off.
“Are you sure she won’t run away?” Flash asked Twilight. “You know, none of us can chase after her right?”
“She wants her freedom Flash,” Twilight answered. “And she has a golden opportunity. I can assure you, she won’t run away.”
“You trust her?” He asked.
“Maybe,” Twilight shrugged as she watched Dash make a sharp U-turn and land in front of them.
“Yup, it’s a sea serpent. A gay sea serpent,” Dash said. “But maybe he’s just flamboyant or something. Anyway he seems pissed about his… her… its mustache.”
“Okay,” Twilight replied. “Let’s see if we can get us a ride to the other side.”
They walked down the riverbank until they reach the sea serpent. He was crying dramatically as he stroked his ruined mustache.
“Hey, what the matter?” Flash asked in a friendly manner.
“Oh it’s simply horrible!” The serpent said. “A band of hooded ponies came and tore the left side of my mustache. Oh the equinity!”
“Cultist!” Twilight muttered. “Can you get us to the other side? We have a score to settle with those ponies who tore your mustache.” But the serpent didn’t hear her over the sound of his weeping much to Twilight’s annoyance.
“Excuse me mister serpent, can you spare us a moment?” Rarity asked politely.
“Yes?” The serpent responded.
“I see that your mustache is ruined, but it isn’t,” Rarity said.
“What do you mean?” The serpent asked. “I’m hideous!” He said hysterically.
“Not if I have anything to say about it,” Rarity said. “With a quick makeover I’ll make you look divine. I’ll even do it free of charge! What do you say?”
“Hmm,” The serpent rubbed his chin.“Alright, might as well give it a shot.”
The serpent lowered his head so that rarity can reach it and she began to think about what she’s going to do. After she made up her mind she immediately set to work and began cutting and styling what was left of the serpents mustache.
“All done! Tell me what you think,” She said as she handed a mirror to the serpent.
The serpent inspected his new toothbrush mustache. “I. Look. Absolutely. FABULOUS! ” The sea serpent squealed. “I feel inspired all of the sudden,” He gasped as an idea ran through his mind. “I should probably go back home and finish art school, I’m sure I’ll make it through this time.”
“That’s a wonderful idea dear!” Rarity agreed. “You should always follow your dreams. And even if you don’t succeed I’m sure life will push you to a better path.”
“Thank you dear,” The sea serpent said. “Now allow me to carry you and your friends to the other side. It’s the least I could do to repay your generosity.”
“Why thank you!” Rarity replied as she hopped to the serpents back. Twilight’s crew immediately followed her. The serpent swam towards the other side and dropped them off before saying goodbye.
“How’d you do it Rarity?” Twilight asked.
“Oh Twilight, showing a little bit of generosity through free service always comes with a favor in return,” Rarity explained. “I may be a scammer, but I don’t always lie to get out of my problems.”
“Uh-huh,” Twilight replied.
------[T]/------
After another round of walking they finally saw their destination. The ruins of The Castle of the Two Sisters were now in sight. There was just one tiny problem.
“That is one deep chasm!” Flash said as he whistled at the sight of the deep and wide fracture on the ground. “And looks like those assholes wrecked the only bridge,” He said as he pointed to the remains of the rope bridge that was rolled neatly on the other side.
“Dash you’re the only one who can fly that has a straight head, no offence Fluttershy,” Twilight said. “I need you to fly on the other side, unfurl the rolled up rope bridge and bring the other end back here.”
“You got it boss!” Dash said before she prepared to take off.
“Wait! Dash I have something for you,” Flash said as she approached the mare. “I want you to take Lucky Lenny. Just in case you encounter somepony on the other side.”
“I’m honored.” Dash said sarcastically as she took the revolver.
“Just give it back after you’re done okay,” He replied.
“You bet cha!” Dash said as she flew to the other side. Immediately after she landed on the other side a heavy fog rolled up.
“Dash are you still there?” Twilight shouted from the other side.
“Yeah.” She said as she began to unfurl the rolled up bridge.
There was a long period of silence on the other side of the chasm. “What’s taking her so long?” Applejack asked.
Just then three continuous gunshots could be heard coming from the other side. “Rainbow Dash!” Twilight shouted.
They saw a figure flying through the fog. Flash aimed at it with a rifle before he realized it was just Rainbow Dash carrying the other end of the rope bridge. “What the hell happened over there?” He asked the Pegasus as she tied up the bridge.
“I think it’ll be easier to explain if you see it for yourselves,” Rainbow Dash answered as she gave back Flash’s gun.
Twilights crew immediately crossed the bridge, eager to find out what happened on the other side. When they reached it, they found three dead bodies. They were wearing what seems to be a dark mock-up of the Wonderbolt’s uniform.
“You shot them?” Applejack asked.
“Yes,” Rainbow Dash answered.
“Why?” Twilight asked.
“They told me they were with Nightmare Moon,” Dash answered. “Before they could say anything else, my henchmare reflexes kicked in and I opened fire without warning.”
“Did you say your clichéd one-liner?” Dr. Pie asked.
“Yes ma’am,” Dash answered.
“That’s a good henchmare!” She replied as she patted Dash’s head.
“So Twilight, we’re almost at the castle,” Flash said as he inspected his rifle “Do you have a plan?”
“Actually, I do!” She answered as she took the file Blueblood gave him. “I made it on the way her so don’t expect it to be elaborate. But first I need to check on something!” She said as she closed her eyes and began to concentrate.
“Hey what are you- “
“Shh, I think she’s meditating,” Dr. Pie shushed.
Twilight began scanning the area for a specific form of magic energy. One of the many abilities of unicorns included a sixth sense that could be used to detect the flow of magic in the air if you concentrate hard enough. She waited until she found what she was looking for, a faint signal of magic underground that could only belong to a ghost.
“There are ghosts below us,” Twilight said.
“Ghosts!” Rarity gasped.
“Hold on,” Applejack said. “What do ghosts have to do with your plan?”
“Wait, if there are ghosts underground. Then that that means…” Flash Sentry said.
“There’s a crypt or a dungeon below us,” Twilight said as she showed Flash a detailed blueprint and a map of the castle from the file Blueblood gave her. It showed a complex system of tunnels that extended far out from the castle.
“Still what does it have to do with your plan?” Applejack asked.
“Oh right, the plan,” Twilight said as she placed a map of the castle and its surrounding forests in the ground. After doing it, she stopped and stared silently at Flash.
“What?” Flash asked.
“We might not make it out of this alive Flash, and you’re the only one who’s not required to risk his life here,” Twilight said. “I won’t think any less of you if you were to go.”
“What!” He shouted. “No, I won’t leave you guys. I’m all in as well.”
“Are your sure about that?” Twilight asked.
“Like a friend of mine once said,” Flash said. “You can stand me up on the gates of hell, but I won’t back down.”
Twilight smiled. “Hell huh! We might as well call ourselves the Suicide Seven now!” Twilight took a stick and pointed it somewhere on the map. “First things first, Rarity you’re on me since you can teleport and do magic. The rest of you will serve as the distraction. Here’s what I want you all to do…”
------[T]/------
A unicorn cultist sitting on her guard post was snoring peacefully while her partner was sharpening his lance. It they have just greeted the three pony ‘Shadowbolts’ squadron that was supposed to strike a deal with one of the ponies sent to kill or capture their lady, Nightmare Moon.
“Hey… hey wake up,” The cultist guard said as he poked his partner with the bottom of his lance.
“What?” The cultist grumbled as she rubbed her eyes. “Have they returned?” She said as she looked down the road blocked by their checkpoint.
“No, they’ve been out for quite a while,” Her partner answered. “I think we better ch-arrggh! ” The cultist shouted as an angry squirrel jumped on his face and began scratching it. His partner was quick to react and shot a magic bolt at the squirrel killing it instantly.
“What the hell was that?” The mare asked.
“Shit if I know,” The cultist said as he inspected the dead animal. Its eyes were wide open and there were bubbles coming from its mouth. “Wait… Did you hear that?” He said as he heard a rumbling sound from a distance.
“Where’s it coming from?” The unicorn cultist asked as she heard the sound.
“Over there!” The cultist pointed his lance at a large dust cloud down the road. “Oh lord!”
There were about fifty wild beasts of different kind thundering down towards them. Their eyes were bloodshot red and their mouths were frothing as they let out a drug induced roar of anger. Standing on top of the elephant leading the charge was an equally drug crazed Fluttershy who was holding a spear. “Charge my pretties!” She shouted. “Leave none alive!”
