Recap.

The last couple of weeks since the Ponyville days celebration and the unfortunate business with Trenderhoof was pretty funny.

The first incident was when Big Mac lost his voice in a turkey call contest, preventing him from singing in the Pony Tones, a small town barbershop quartet. So, instead of asking someone else to perform for Fluttershy's pet adoption, thing, whatever, they make Fluttershy sound like a dude using poison joke to fill the position. When the reveal happened, I busted a gut laughing my ass off. This caused Shy to shut herself away for a bit, but after a day, she joined the Pony Tones as their fifth, but only for small events.

The second incident was when Scootaloo, Applebloom, and Sweetie Belle tried to use their lessons with Twilight as a way of getting more attention from their classmates. It didn't help that the boys were showing off their skills without thinking about how it would affect their sister, aunt, and friend. It got so out of hand, that a whole mob of school ponies ruined Twilight and Swaggers lunch date at the local diner. Luckily, Swagger came up with a solution, by having everyone who wanted time with Twilight to fill out a form and run an obstacle course. Luckily they disbanded so none of the parents would sue. I was just glad it was over, those kids were spoiling those three rotten and weren't learning a thing. On the bright side, Twilight still let the girls learn from her and Spike made nachos!

Anyway, with all that done, we waited for an event involving the fairy folk known as the breezies. Yippie.

End of Recap.

I stood by my family in the town square with the rest of the town to wait for the Breezies to come by. " Damn ceremonies, this is time I could be working." It's not that I don't like doing things with my family and friends, it's just that almost every week we seem to be doing something as a group.

" Now dear, I know you want to make sure the castle is properly fortified and the army properly prepared. But you can at least appreciate the small get-togethers." Luna was ridding my case before fixing me with a smirk. " Besides, all work and no play makes Joey a dull boy."

" One more remark or pop-culture reference out of you, and I'll delete all you're saved games." Luna bumped me with her flank, knowing that I would never do that to her. " Though, I suppose you do have a point. I guess I should let loose when I get the chance. Speaking of, where's my giant foam cowboy hat and air horn?" Pinkie popped up to my right and handed them to me. " Thanks, Pinks."

" No problem." She put on her own foam hat with a fake arrow through it. Now that I think about it, I think I saw her wear that hat during the Goof-off against Cheese.

While I pondered on her headwear, Twilight took the podium and drew our attention, though in a very hushed tone. " Welcome everyone, to witness the migration of the breezies." The entire square gave a low cheer. What is this? Act like Fluttershy day?

When the cheers died down, a small mass of creatures floated over to us on the breeze Dash and the weather team created. When they were close enough, I could see that they closely resembled ponies with antenna and huge wings, at least compared to their bodies. They had on tiny bags that carried pollen to be distributed in their homeland. While they floated above the crowd, the ponies would ooh and awe at the sight of the small fairy folk.

Not one to be left out of a celebration, I started cheering the redneck way. " Wooo! Go Breezies!" I cheered over everyone while letting my airhorn blast. The sound made the audience recoil from the noise and an even worse fate befell the Breezies. The horn sent a wave of air over to the last few members of the Breezie group, causing them to separate from the others and spin out of control. " Uh oh." The three pegasi were doing their best to keep the breeze going for the rest of the group while some ponies tried to get under the flailing ones, with me joining. " I got 'em, I got 'em." I used my oversized novelty hat as a net and started catching them one by one. " There we go, safe and sound." Unfortunately, one of the Breezies was not very happy to be rescued.

A Breezie with a black outfit and pink hair got right in my face and started screaming at me in its own language, it'd be intimidating if it didn't sound like a child sucking on helium. " Uh, Mimir, any idea what it's saying?"

" Sorry brother, my fairy is a bit rusty. But I can tell you now, it does not sound pleasant."

" Yeah, I could've told you that."

" If you want me to insult you in your tongue, I can certainly do that." I looked down to the Breezie that was insulting me earlier. " You fuckin' idiot! You made us lose ground with the others with your damn horn! If ya weren't such a big giant fuck, I'd kick the shit out of ya right here and now!" I tried my hardest not to laugh, but it's very difficult when you're being threatened by something so small and feminine looking. At least I know he's a dude now.

" All right, calm down you Irish sounding prick. We'll get you and the others back in a jiffy. Now, where are you heading? I'd like to know where I'll be tossing you guys."

I made to toss the hat with the cursing little sprite and his friends, but Fluttershy took my hat before I could. " How about I make sure that they're alright before we send them on their way? After all, they did just get blasted with an air horn." She directed that comment right at me with an accusing frown. Guess I deserve that. " Come on little friends, let's get you comfortable." She took my hat and headed back to her cottage.

While she took the Breezies and my hat to her cottage, Jackie and Lulu fixed me with a not so amused look. " Don't you two be fixin' me with a look, especially you Moonbutt. You're the one who told me to loosen up."

" I told you to enjoy the time spent with us, not to act like a fool." I pondered what she said and realized I couldn't win.

" Damn. You got a point there darling. Maybe I should offer my assistance for their journey home, even the one with Tourettes."

" I'm sure Fluttershy would appreciate it, but you might want to give it a couple of hours to let that one Breezie cool off."

" Yeah, he did sound pissed off, funny as hell, but still pretty pissed. Alright, I'll give it a few hours, but in the meantime, what should we do?" At that very moment, Dash flew down behind my head and blew the air horn next to my ear. " Aaaargh!" While she laughed in mid-air, I took the opportunity to wheel around and strangle her. " I'll teach you to prank me while I'm talking about making amends for my consequences!"

Three hours later.

I headed down the path towards Fluttershy's cottage to see if I could offer some assistance to make amends for my earlier discretion against the Breezies. Floating alongside me was the embodiment of chaos itself, Discord. " So, why'd you decide to come along? You have nothing to do with the incident involving the Breezies, and your Tuesday tea was two days ago."

" What? I just feel that we haven't spent enough time together. Plus, it's been a long time since I've seen the Breezies." He explained to me while plucking various leaves from trees and rolling them into already lit cigars.

" Yes, and the fact that they're all at Fluttershy's place has nothing to do with it." My accusation made him swallow one of the cigars, causing him to have a coughing fit and belch fire.

" That is an odious lie and I should part ways with you this instant!" He turned a one-eighty and headed the other way, only for him to pop out of a tree's hollow. " On the other hand, my assistance could prove invaluable to the Breezies return home, and that could mean praise from an entire race of creatures." He ended his rant by snapping a hero's backdrop and a cape for himself.

With the pull of the rope to the right of his backdrop, it all fell away as we neared Fluttershys door. " Quit goofing off and let's get this over with." I went to knock on the door, but before I could do that, the peephole to the door opened, I didn't even think that was possible. Out from the little hole, the little foul-mouthed sprite made it's way out. Before he could get very far, he flew smack dab into me. " Where the hell do you think you're going?"

The little fucker shook the stars from his eyes before settling them on me. When he saw who he smacked into, he turned into a raging ball of furry on helium. " You again? How is it that whenever I try to get home, you are always in my fuckin' way!"

" I can see a few hours with Fluttershy hasn't improved your mood. But tell me, why do you go alone, while leaving your companions behind?"

" Those idiots! They'd rather stay here and make asses of themselves, while the portal to our home is closing the longer we stay. I have to get home to my wife before I can't for at least a whole nother year!" Now it started to click. This angry little shit has a need to go back, and damned be anything that stands in his way.

" Well, that explains why you need to go, but what about the others, do they not also have loved ones waiting for them?"

" No. The group that is with me, is too young to have felt a female's warmth and just want to party all the time. I kept trying to get them to come, but those fucks won't listen to me!" Can't imagine why.

Discord decided to enter the conversation. " Have you perhaps spoken to your comrades they way you've been speaking to him?" He pointed at me while asking.

" I talk to everyone like this, you son of a thousand bastard fathers!" Discord made to grab him and strangle him.

I stopped his attempt and put him to the side. " Do you mind?" Discord let out a huff before I continued with the Breezie. " How about this, we go back in, and we talk to the other Breezie's about going home, not shouting or cursing, but talk. Sound good to you?" The little pissant rolled his eyes before nodding his head. " Alright, that settles it then." I put the foul-mouthed sprite on my shoulder and went inside.

When we went inside, the whole cottage was a mess with Breezies partying and lazing about. Fluttershy was walking around tending to the needs of her tiny guests when she saw us come in. " Oh, Joe, Discord, what're you doing here?" She then saw the Breezie on my shoulder. " Sea Breeze! What were you doing out there by yourself?

" We caught this one trying to leave without the others." The sprite stuck his tongue at me before rejoining the others. " Though he was brash, his purpose was valid, he and the others need to go before it's too late."

Fluttershy looked like she was about to agree with me, but then all the Breezies huddled around her and what I presumed, plead with her not to let them leave. " Oh, I suppose another snack wouldn't hurt." Sea Breeze and I both groaned at Fluttershy's doormat nature come about.

I was about to scoop them up in the foam hat in the corner and toss them out the door, but Discord decided to be the voice of reason for once in his life. " Fluttershy, please listen." He brought her in with his eagle claw and gestured to the Breezies. " I know from experience that you're a kind host and would never do anything to make your guests feel unwanted." Shy's cheeks became red with Discords every word. " But, even the best host knows when their guests need to leave. And these Breezies," He gestured to the fairy folk surrounding her hooves. " whether they know it or not, need to leave so they can see their home again."

Fluttershy looked into Discord's eyes and saw the sincerity in his words. With those words, Shy took in a deep inhale before focusing on the Breezies with a stern look. " That's right!" The Breezies made a confused sound. " You all need to leave so you can go home and be with your loved ones!" They all gave her a sad look and some even faked a cough to change her mind. It looked like she was about to cave, but then Discord put a reassuring paw on her shoulder. With even more conviction, she pointed out the door with a stern voice. " Out! Now!"

With some reluctance, the fairy folk floated out the front door with heads hung low. When Sea Breeze left with them, Shy closed the door and looked like she was on the verge of tearing up. Before she could shed a single tear, Discord wrapped himself around her in a warm embrace. " No tears my dear Fluttershy. You did the right thing."

" I know I did, but it was just so hard." She whimpered into his chest.

" Doing the right thing is often hard, but well worth it in the end." I went over to the table with my foam hat and placed it on my head. " Now, let's get Dash and the other pegasi to make that breeze." And with that, I went out the door with those two following me out.

An hour later.

" What do you mean the group isn't large enough!?" I asked Shy as we tried to send the Breezies home.

" The breeze that's being made is too strong for them to take and the weather team can't flap any slower or else they'll stall. Oh, what are we going to do?"

" Well, I still got this hat." I brought out the foam hat before Luna snatched it away with her magic.

" Enough with the hat!" She burned the hat and sent the ashes to the four winds. " Now then, I think I might have a solution to our problem here." She looked over to Twilight. " Do you remember that spell I taught you, the one to change one being into another?" I don't know if I like where this is going.

" Yes, I do. Everybody ready?" All the girls nodded while I tried to sneak away. Before I could get very far, Twilight brought me over with her magic. " Where do you think you're going?"

" Anywhere but here. There is no way in all the realms you're turning me into a Breezie!" I did all in my power to flee from Twilight and I almost escaped, but then Luna added her magic. " No fair!"

" Think of this as your punishment for causing the Breezies to fall behind." Luna nodded to Twilight, signaling to start the spell. She nodded back and started up the spell.

She fired the spell toward the Breezies and it surrounded them. It then shot toward us, beginning a transformation in all of us. Within moments, the ladies started to shrink and gain insect-like antenna and huge transparent wings. They all looked so cute.

They all admired their new look but recoiled when they saw me. Luna was the one to ask for everyone in her new tiny voice. " Honey. What happened to you?"

" What do you mean?" My voice had also changed when I shrunk, though it sounded raspier than the others. I saw a puddle nearby and went to look at what they were gawking at. When I looked upon the reflection of my transformed state, I now know why the girls were afraid.

I could hardly believe that the beast in the puddle staring at me, was really me. Somehow, the spell must have backfired or mixed with the wolf and turned me into this thing for the time being. Having had enough of the image in the puddle, I turned toward the others, more specifically, Twilight. " For the sake of my family and your health, this had better be reversible." Wanting to get this over with and return to normal size, I took to the air and pointed to where the breeze was heading. " Now let's get these pixies home!" The Breezies and the girls put aside my odd transformation and focused on the task at hand.

For the last few hours, we traveled on the breeze through forests, deserts, and hills, at least, that was what they seemed like when you're the size of a bug. While we ventured to the Breezies homeland, a few predators saw our group as an easy meal. Many birds, snakes, and other small animals saw to making us their next meal. Unfortunately for them, when I shrunk, so to did Frostbite. I did not kill them, for they were only hungry and following their instincts, but I made sure they knew we were not on the menu.

After scaring a flock of birds and two fox kits, we arrived at a waterfall and entered a hole that let the breeze flow in. After entering the hole we soon came across another hole that was slowly but surely closing, and beyond that, we were a witness to a whole new world, a tiny mushroom laden world. " Wow, it's just like the Smurfs but without all the different uses for the word smurf."

The Breezies ignored me while they reunited with their friends and family. Off to the side, I saw Sea Breeze float over to another Breezie with a small bundle in her arms. I went over to him and saw the Breezie give the bundle to him, which just so happens to be a baby Breezie. Sea Breeze had tears in his eyes as he held the child in his arms. As I leaned over to look at the baby, I whispered over to Sea Breeze. " I take it that this came as a surprise to you?"

" He is. But, he's not an unhappy surprise," He then turned to me. " and I have you and that yellow one to thank for helping us get home, even if you are butt-ugly." I laughed with him 'cause even I had to agree that my appearance could shatter a mirror. When our laughing ceased, Sea Breeze pointed out that the portal was closing fast. " I believe it's time for you and your friends to head home before it's too late." I made to go with the others before Sea Breeze handed me a flower. " Give this to Fluttershy. A gift for her hospitality and my apology for being short with all of you."

I took the flower from him and patted him on the shoulder. " I will miss you and I hope to see you again. Farewell, my friend." After saying goodbye to my new friend, I headed back through the portal with the others, remembering to give Fluttershy Sea Breeze's gift once we made it out safely. When the gift was given and we were safely back on the ground, Twilight used her magic to change us back. " Did it work? Am I back to what I was?"

I made my way to the water's edge to look at my face, but I was stopped by Rainbow Dash. " I wouldn't do that if I were you. Your face didn't quite change back and it still looks pretty bad." At hearing that my face was still deformed I pushed past her and made it to the water, to see what had happened to my face. When I looked into the water, I saw my face staring back at me with a dumb look. While observing my face, I heard Dash laughing like an idiot over by the others. " What'd I tell ya, butt ugly. Hahaha ugh." For the second time that day, I had my hands around Dash's throat. " Totaly...worth....it."

Author's Note

If anyone notices the difference in my writing style, it's because I've recently been watching Vikings while I type these words. That's all I got.

The next chapter involves the kids and being trusted with an important job involving pies.

Clip.

And since it's so close to Christmas.