Behind the Bleeding Veil

Regina sat at her desk working on her reading assignment. Part of her Gen Ed classes was one on creative writing. For this assignment she had five poems to read on a related subject and write an essay on how each poet approached the subject and how they used style as substance. It was boring, overly complicated, and she hated it. She hated most things now. Maybe not hated, but was greatly displeased.

She was sent out into to the world to witness and bring souls to Christ yet she had completely failed. The actual work she needed to do for school ate up most of her time; leaving her next to none to engage in her mission. Then there was the push back. Frequently her evangelizing brought her in to conflict with the other students, administrators, even the other so-called Christian clubs (whom she dubbed the false apostles). Finally there was her, herself.

She took her right hand and moved some hair behind her right ear to get it away from her face. She wore her hair down now. She shaved now. She shaped her eyebrows now. She wore pants and shirts and sweaters. The only thing she didn't do was wear make-up. Each decision, each step, was a small one. Ok, maybe "a small one" is an understatement since each one involved intensive prayer; but once made, it didn't feel like a life changing decision. Now here she was; almost unrecognizable from who she was when she started. It would seem she didn't change the world, the world changed her.

She turned her head and looked out the window. It was night, the lights from the various buildings she could formed what she had come to call urban stars. The light from the real stars had been crowed out and the light from the windows and street lights had taken their place. There weren't that many though, not enough to completely chase away the darkness of night, so the window still took on a mirror like quality. She stared at her own ghostly image reflected in it. She felt the way it looked - ephemeral, incomplete, a distortion of who or what she was.

She turned back to her computer screen. It was an old laptop that Faustine had given her to use. She looked at it but didn't see it. She was still lost in her own thoughts. Why had she been chosen? Clearly she was no good at what she was doing. God didn't make mistakes though. He had sent her so she must be the right person for the job. Maybe all the changes she had made was what was keeping her from doing what she was meant to. Yet she was never told or shown a sign that she was wrong. Then again, maybe that was because God didn't feel he had to. She knew what was right and what was wrong. Maybe His silence was His way of saying, you know better. Maybe she should change back. Then again, that didn't really work out so well the first time.

Everything she had done seemed logical at the time. She had made moral compromises but all those were to accomplish the greater good. Maybe that was it though. Maybe because she was acting out of reason and not faith, that was why God had been so silent. Your ways are not our ways. Your thoughts are so far above ours, she thought to herself. Maybe that's all true but a little sign wouldn't hurt.

"Hey Reggie, what's going on?" Fluttershy asked as she walked into their dorm. She had been out at the library working on a research paper. She could tell that something was wrong with Regina by how still she sat.

"Oh, hey Faustine," Regina replied on autopilot. It was hard to tell if she had actually acknowledged Fluttershy was there or if the greeting was so ingrained that her conscious mind didn't actually know she was there.

Fluttershy walked over, sat on the edge of the desk, and lifted Regina's head up so that their eyes met. "What's up Reg? You ok?" she asked concerned.

Regina turned away, back to her screen, and shook her head. "Just thinking; trying to figure some things out," she replied despondently.

Fluttershy nodded. "Listen, we've both been really good with our diet and exercise; how `bout we go out for some PP - pizza and Pepsi? "

Regina smiled slightly at Faustine's crude joke. "Ok. That sounds good," she answered; still depressed and confused but with a slight bit of happiness.

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What Fluttershy said had been true. Both of them had watched what they were eating and exercised almost everyday. For Fluttershy, it was all about maintaining what she had; for Regina, it was just about hanging out with Fluttershy but the results were still amazing. She had lost ten pounds total put had drastically toned up to the point where she was just starting to get a six pack. She already had to replace all the new clothes she had bought as well as buying new underwear.

That had been an experience. She had never seen so many different (and often down right slutty) choices. Had not Faustine been there with her, she probably would have broke down and ran out of the store. Luckily Faustine was able to keep her cool and eventually she began to enjoy the experience. She picked some nice things, not all were white, she got some pink, light blue, and purple high leg panties and matching t-shirt bras. In the end, she had a lot of fun.

This is what Regina thought about as the two sat down at the booth in the pizzeria. It just made her wonder if she had completely lost track of what she was supposed to be doing again. Faustine whom she spent the most time with, talked the most to, was still as lost as she had ever been. There had to be something that she was missing, something she was doing wrong.

"Hey. Reg, I'm here to help even if that help is only listening. Something is obviously bothering you. If you don't want to talk now, that's fine, but my ears are open any time you need." Fluttershy reached out and took Regina's right hand.

Regina nodded; still looking away. She appreciated what Faustine was doing but doubted if she could really help.

"Well, Ryan wants to know if we want to come to a Halloween party with him this weekend. He invited me at the library today. It's not a frat thing so that's good." Fluttershy tried to sound upbeat to see if that would lighten Regina's mood.

"I can't be involved in anything that celebrates the Devil,: Regina said without much conviction. "What am I doing here Faustine? I was sent to win souls, change hearts and minds and the only thing I've changed is me. I feel like I'm failing God."

It was then Fluttershy understood the full depth of what Regina was going through.

"Honey, sweetie; the only thing you've changed is your appearance. You're still the same sweet girl I first met almost three months ago. You still read your Bible every night. You're not failing. You're living."

"Living for who though? Me? The fallen world? God? I just don't know anymore. I don't even know if I know who I am any more."

Fluttershy could hear the clear anguish in Regina's voice. She was breaking. "I'm not a Bible expert but if I remember correctly; isn't there a verse that says you shall know a tree by it's fruit? You feel your god is love right? Then show love. Show compassion. Help those who need it. If your actions shine, people will come to you."

"I tried that Faustine. And it's gotten me no where."

"You changed your appearance. That's all you've done. That's not exactly helping anyone. Also, handing out pamphlets out side of where the LGBTQIA support group meets saying they're all perverts going to Hell wasn't helping either."

"Yes it was. I was trying to warn them so they wouldn't go to Hell," Regina protested.

"Ok and what would you think if someone was handing out flyers as you were leaving church saying all Christians were dumb and stupid? Especially if you never saw them before."

"That's different!"

"Why? Because you're right and they would be wrong? Even if you don't consider that, you still wouldn't feel so good about that person would you? Maybe you wouldn't even want to talk to them. It wouldn't matter if they were a good person or how well they treated other people outside of that incident; you still wouldn't want to engage with them - am I right?"

"I see your point," Regina said reluctantly.

Fluttershy leaned in over the table. "Reggie, you're an amazing person. I love you to death. You have a real purpose to you and everyone is going to know it. Don't beat yourself up, don't second guess yourself. You're on the right path; trust me."

Regina squeezed Fluttershy's hand as she looked deep into her eyes. Being around Faustine always made her feel better, special, loved. The feelings she had, the ones she was having now, she couldn't explain them, she couldn't even fully comprehend them except to know that she enjoyed being around Faustine. More than that, she felt a peace, a deep peace whenever she was around her and that she felt a minor anger or resentment whenever she talked or went out with Ryan. This connection, this bond, made her feel at both warm and scared at the same time.

"I do trust you Faustine. I trust you completely."

"Then come with me Saturday night to the party. You don't have to dress up, you don't have to drink or anything. Just come, come there to be with me. Who knows, maybe you'll win a soul over or, even better, maybe you'll have some fun."

Regina reluctantly nodded but still had a smile on her face. "Ok, I will for you."

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The two returned to their dorm with Regina in much better spirits than when they had left. It wasn't so much as she had solved her issues but that rather Faustine had caused her to forget them. That was always her way. Faustine never really addressed, talked about, or discussed what Regina was actually feeling with respects to her religious calling, she just slowly (or sometimes quickly) changed the subject. Regina figured it out right away but went along because onw - Faustine always made her feel better; and two - because Regina knew that since Faustine was a nonbeliever; she was holding back her actual thoughts as to not upset Regina. It was something Regina admired and respected about her.

As soon as Regina had closed their door behind, Faustine, still giggling from the conversation that had been having on the way up, stopped, turned around, and said, "Hey, I wanna show you something; see what you think." Fluttershy went over to her bed and pulled a box out from underneath it. It was thin, rectangular in shape, and plain white.

"I got this a couple days," Fluttershy said as she went in to the bathroom and closed the door.

"Alright," called out Regina in a slightly confused voice. She figured it must be an outfit of some sort. Faustine would sometimes ask Regina's opinion on clothes she bought when they went out shopping together. It was nice, Regina enjoyed being asked, but Faustine had such impeccable taste in clothing, she really didn't need Regina's advice. She wondered if she should sit down but decided to just keep standing. After fifteen minutes, Regina began to rethink her decision when the bathroom door opened and Faustine walked out.

Fluttershy slowly, gracefully made her entrance. What she was wearing was no outfit, at least none you'd ever wear out somewhere. It was a light blue, sheer robe lined in fake white fur. It buttoned together at the breast with one button. The sleeves came to just bellow the elbow with the total length falling just bellow her hips. She had no bra on underneath with allowed full view of her breasts. She had a pair of pale blue thong panties on. they were a see through lace to just about where her slit began; there they were solid.

Fluttershy did a few sultry poses in the doorway before stepping out seductively and saying in a deep, sexy voice, "What do you think?"

Regina stumbled backward, unable to breathe. Her brain had completely fried. She was incapable of coherent thought. All she could do was stand there, mouth agape, shaking.

"Well, I take it that you think I either look really good or really bad," Fluttershy said with a laugh. "My ego suggests I take it as the former."

"You . . . you . . . you look . . . amazing," Regina struggled to get out.

"Thanks," Fluttershy responded with a giggle. She then did a quick turn to give a full 360 degree view. "I'm thinking about asking Ryan if I can spend the night with him next weekend and I wanted to get something with a little 'wow' factor behind it. I know you don't approve of that type of thing, and I'm sorry if this makes you feel uncomfortable; but you are my friend, one of my best really, and you're honest, so that's why I thought I'd ask."

Regina still struggled to think, let alone speak. Seeing Faustine, like this, it was doing something to her that she couldn't comprehend. She couldn't take her eyes off her, they just roamed up and down her body, trying to take in all that she could see and burn it permanently to her memory. A desire to reach and touch the fabric, run her hands over it, started to take over.

"It, uh, it looks, you look very nice," she stumbled to say.

Fluttershy picked up the bottom of the robe and pulled it forward a little. "Here, feel. It's super soft."

Regina walked over, in an almost trance like state, took the fabric in her and, and rubbed it between her fingers. It was extremely soft and silky to the touch, no doubt. Regina's gaze moved from the fabric she was holding to Faustine's breasts to her face. She felt a heavy pressure on her chest and found it difficult to breathe again.

"I, I might not approve, but he will be grateful," Regina said with all her strength. Then she dropped the robe in a feeling somewhere between anger and sadness. She assumed it was because Faustine was planning on engaging in sinful relations with a boy, yet there was something else there she couldn't quite put her finger on.

"Oh, thanks Reggie. That means a lot," Fluttershy responded happily and gave Regina a hug.

Regina's eyes bulged out of her head as her body turned ramrod stiff. Her brain once again shut itself down.

Fluttershy pulled back and smiled. "Well, I'm just going to go to bed now. Since I already have this on, I'm just going to wear it to bed. I hope you don't mind."

"No, not at all," Regina answered back awkwardly.

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Regina woke from a light, troubled sleep. She could hear soft, gentle, moaning coming from across the room. They didn't sound like moans of pain or even those cartoony moans ghosts make in movies and TV shows. These sounded almost joyful, happy. She slowly opened her eyes and looked to where the sounds were coming from.

Faustine, bathed in the pale. white light coming in from the window, sat on her bed, her legs spread. The robe she had on was opened and pulled to the side to fully expose her breasts. She gently slid her left hand over them, occasionally pinching or twisting a nipple. Her right hand softly moved up and down on the outside of her panties. Sometimes her hand would move the crotch of the panty over to reveal a little of her labia.

Regina watched, transfixed, as Faustine continued. She took her left hand and pulling the crotch of her panties fully away, exposing all of her pussy. the finger tips of her right hand glided up and down her slit; then she brought her fingers to her mouth, sucked on them, then went back to their previous work.

As she watched, Regina realized her own right hand had pulled up her nightgown, slid beneath her panties, and was rubbing herself in the same way as Faustine. She didn't try to fight (she doubted if she could have anyways). Her hand perfectly syncopated with Faustines, matching speed, rhythm, and motion perfectly. Little sparks of electricity began to flash and spark from her genitals. She also felt a wetness down there as if she had peed herself. Millions of little bubble seemed to form and pop all over her skin. Her conscious self disappeared, evaporated a little into her brain as instinct took over and she became awash in pleasure.

See could see Faustines hips start to gyrate and pulse as her hand moved quicker, concentrating on one area right above her vaginal opening, her left hand occasionally sticking a finger inside. Regina assumed it was the bump she now felt above her own. What was that called, the clitoris? It didn't matter. It commanded her full attention. A brief thought of sticking a finger inside her own self prang up but quickly vanished as to the fact her clitoris was providing such wonderful sensations.

Soon Regina's own hips began to buck and writhe on their own, still in time with Faustine's. A burning pressure began to build in her vagina as she felt it began to contract wildly. Every nerve cell in her body began to fire and became fire. Her muscles began to convulse in ways she had never imagined before and from the look on Faustine's face and the way her own body was twitching; she was feeling the same. Suddenly it felt like there was an explosion between her legs. She almost screamed out but had enough of herself left to stop herself. Her body stiffened, relaxed, stiffened, relaxed, in multiple cycles before falling limp. All Regina could do was stare at Faustine, as an ocean of pleasure she had never experienced came over her. Faustine sighed, licked and sucked her fingers one last time, got underneath her covers, and rolled over.

Regina laid in her bed, in a state of pure bliss until her thinking mind came back to her and she realized what she had done. She had improperly touched herself. More than that, she did it while watching another person, another GIRL do it as well. She began to quietly cry to herself as she slapped her legs. She felt sick and disgusting. She had betrayed God most of all. She repented with all her heart and just wanted to jump up and shower the sin off her but was afraid of Faustine seeing her and asking what she was doing. So she stayed put and cried herself to sleep.