The Principles of Safety

by Kalashnikitty

Chapter 2

Previous ChapterNext Chapter

Sunlight streamed into the bedroom, the rays reaching out and caressing Rick's face, the heat and light threatening to wake him from his slumber. Scrunching his face, he attempted to roll away from the invasive beams, only to be made aware of a weight on his chest preventing his movement. Groggily opening his eyes, he was greeted with a large lump under the covers on his chest. Carefully moving a hand and pulling them back, he was greeted with an adorable sight.

"D'aww..."

The Princess of the night, in all her glory, was curled up on his chest like a housecat, snoozing away. Her light snores reached his ears and his smile grew. He chuckled at the sight, reaching out and stroking her cheek. She snorted once, then shifted slightly, resuming her sleep. Letting out a content sigh, Rick went over the events of the previous day in his mind. Remembering last night, his eyes widened and he looked down at Luna again.

Holy shit... Luna slept with me..

He lay his head back on his pillow, a content and happy smile on his face. Back on Earth, he had been single for 5 years, and spent many a sleepless night yearning for a warm body to snuggle up to. And now here he was, in magical pony land, with one of the Monarchs snoozing on top of him. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't enjoying every second of it.

But all good things must come to an end, and eventually the light from the window tracked it's way up onto Luna's face. Her snoring petered off, and she shifted again, laying her head between her forelegs. Letting out an annoyed groan, she rubbed her eyes with a hoof before opening them, the blue orbs focusing on Rick.

"G'mornin' Rick.." she slurred, her sleep addled mind barely functional.

"Good Morning, housecat." he said, snickering.

"We're no housecat, we are the princess of the night." she said sleepily.

"You're certainly acting like one."

"Quiet, you, or we'll banish you to places long forgotten to Ponykind!" she proclaimed, raising a hoof triumphantly.

"Uh-huh, sure. Care to tell me why you're up there instead of next to me? Pretty sure you wanted to be little spoon."

"Well, after waking up to lower the moon earlier this morning, around 6 am, we came back to you laying on your back as such. So, we decided that a new resting place would be required, and chose your breast to lay upon. We assumed you wouldn't mind."

"Well, you got that one right, missus." He said, reaching up and wrapping his arms around her. She smiled, leaning down and planting a kiss directly on his lips. His eyes widened, surprised, but slowly his eyes fluttered closed and he returned the kiss with passion. Her soft lips were perfect in his eye, and she was an excellent kisser. She broke the kiss after a few seconds, leaving Rick to lie there contentedly, eyes still closed.

"That was the first time you kissed me..." he dreamily said, smiling a dopey smile. Luna giggled, bringing a hoof up to stifle her laughter. For a few minutes, the two just lay there, enjoying each other's presence.

Checking his watch, the time read 10:23. Sighing, he put an arm over his eyes, groaning.

"Luna, it's 10 am. We should get up."

She sighed. "That would be in best interests, yes. What was on the agenda for today?"

"Well, we have the day free, but later tonight we're going to the party at Twilight's castle. Apparently it's a 'super duper amazing speech' party."

Her eyes brightened, and her smile grew. "Excellent! We look forward to this night!"

Rick chuckled, and he booped her on the nose. "Either way, we should get up. I'm starving."

Luna hopped off of Rick, alighting on the floor next to the bed, before trotting into his bathroom and closing the door. Rick sat up, yawning and stretching, then swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. He stood, yawning once more as he walked over to the kitchen in their room to begin breakfast. The stove and counters were very low, only reaching up to his knees. Sighing, he pulled a carton of eggs from the icebox, turned on the stove and set a pan on it. While he was waiting for the pan to heat up, he heard the sound of running water.

Hm. Luna's taking a shower.

5 minutes later, the bathroom door opened and Luna, still wet from her shower, trotted into the kitchen area. Smelling the cooking eggs, her mouth watered. Rick flipped an egg, and motioned to a plate already on the small table.

"Two eggs, over medium, just like you like 'em, and a glass of water." He said, smiling.

"Thank you, love." She replied, sitting at the table and taking a fork in her magic. Using the side of the fork to cut the eggs into pieces, she popped a section into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully.

"Mmm, delicious."

Sitting down across from her, Rick applied a liberal amount of salt and pepper to his eggs, before beginning to eat as well.

"You ponies and your unseasoned eggs. Weird." He said, looking at Luna's remaining food and the lack of salt or pepper. Preposterous!

"You're the weird one, seasoning eggs." Luna giggled. Rolling his eyes, Rick went back to his food, finishing it and his water in one fell swoop. Taking his plate to the sink, he rinsed and washed it, returning it to the cabinet where it belongs.

"You do realize we could have had a servant bring us breakfast, yes?" Luna asked, bringing her own plate to the sink.

"Yes, but I enjoy cooking, and you enjoy my food, so I thought this'd be better."

"But now we have to cleannnnn!" Luna complained, in mock annoyance.

"Oh, quit your whining."

She stuck out her tongue at him, placing the plate in the sink with her magic.

"Careful, stick that tongue out any further and I'll bite it." Rick coyly smiled.

"Don't you threaten us with a good time." She returned his smile coquettishly.

Rick laughed. "Ah, I love you, Luna."

"We-I, love you as well, Rick." Luna nuzzled his arm playfully.

"Anyways, How about a walk on the town? Get some fresh air, it's nice out today!"

Luna sighed, rolling her eyes.

"This blasted schedule is making our head throb. We are the Princess of the Night! And yet here we are, awake and refreshed at 10 o'clock AM. We can not wait for this tour to be over, and to return to being a night owl once again!"

"I feel you. Back on Earth I worked midnight shift at the office. Got more action that way, and got to see the beautiful night, even if it wasn't yours." Rick said, reminiscing on the memories. He leaned down and kissed Luna's forehead, before walking back to his room. Luna smiled after him, then went into her own room. Her bed was still made, as a result of sleeping with Rick, but she still had her luggage. Although most of the time she didn't wear clothes, today was rather brisk, so she decided to wear a jacket. Perusing her few clothes, a nefarious idea formed in her head.

She was going to steal one of Rick's.

Cackling quietly, she walked back through the kitchen to the entrance of Ricks room. Peering around the corner, she saw that he was in the bathroom. Quickly trotting to his luggage, she found a Black hoodie that read EPSO S.W.A.T on the back. Giggling, she took it and ran back to her own room. It took her a minute to figure out how to put it on, and when she finally manged to get it on it was rather large. Not that it mattered, she was content nonetheless. Her horn lit up and she levitated one of the books she was reading over in front of her, laying down facing the kitchen entrance way. She giggled once more, then opened her book and began reading.

Finishing his shower, Rick stepped out of the bathroom with a towel for modesty, and walked over to his luggage. Seeing as today would be more laid back, he selected a comfortable black t-shirt with an American flag embroidered on the left arm, and Luna's cutie mark on the other. This particular shirt was from Rarity, as she had been ecstatic to make clothes for a new species. Pulling on a new pair of boxers, he perused his pants for a minute before selecting a pair of jeans. Lastly, he decided on a hoodie, but his favorite was missing.

"What the fuck? Where's my SWAT hoodie?"

After frantically searching for a minute, he gave up and walked into Luna's room.

"Hey, have you seen my S-" He froze, jaw slightly open at the sight of her. She looked up at him, an innocent expression on her face.

"Yes, love? Something you need?" She asked playfully.

"That's my.. that's my hoodie!" He indignantly said, pointing.

She looked down, a look of mock surprise on her face.

"So it is." She stated simply.

Rick just stared.

She looked back up at him, retaining the innocent expression before slowly grinning. Unable to contain herself any longer, she burst out laughing, rolling onto her back and kicking her legs into the air.

Rick just stared.

Her laughing fit over, Luna stood up and walked over to him, nuzzling his hand and extending a wing to boop him on the nose. Snapping out of his haze, his look softened.

"Geez, here you are, acting like a girlfriend. Stealing my clothes." He chuckled, stroking between her ears. She giggled.

"This is rather comfortable, perhaps we should have Miss Rarity make one of our own... Or we could just keep this one" She said, admiring the black fabric.

"I think 'Mallow should make one for you," Rick said, "Because that one's special to me."

"Oh? How so?" She asked, curious.

Rick sat down on her bed.

"Well, it represents my time in my office's SWAT Team. It's the elite branch of law enforcement, for when the bad guys are really bad," He explained, "Though I do have some great stories from some operations we did."

She hopped up next to him, wrapping a wing around him and pulling him close.

"Do tell, we would love to hear one." She said, looking at him expectantly.

"Alright, alright," He said, smirking, "So no shit, there I was..."


Light Step awoke to find herself dangling off the bed, wings fully extended. Groaning, she shakily rolled off, carefully standing and giving a few experimental flaps.

"Great, another wet dream." she grumbled, her wings aching. Yawning, she checked the time. 10:54. Sighing to herself, she trotted to the kitchenette, opening a cabinet. Looking around, she found what she was looking for. A solitary apple. Taking it in hoof, she munched thoughtfully, thinking through the day.

The Princess wasn't going to have any meetings or appearances today, so trying to knock her off then would have to wait. She could wait for her to leave, if they left, then follow her and do it then, but she would likely have the damned human with her, and Step didn't want to get caught. Groaning again, she rolled her eyes. There had to be a better way to do this! Thinking it over several more times, a plan slowly made its way to the surface of her thoughts.

The Princess would be vulnerable during the raising and lowering of the moon.

Step had heard about Pinkie Pie throwing a 'super duper amazing speech' party.

The entire town was invited, and The Princess would likely be there. And she would likely raise the moon during the party. All she had to do was wait for the right moment, take her shot, and in the ensuing chaos she would make her escape! It was a foolproof plan! Smiling, she solidified it in her head.

All she had to do now was be patient.

After all, what did she have to worry about?


Twilight's Castle(Or the Castle of Friendship) Loomed above Luna and Rick, as they made their way up the steps to the door. Earlier in the day, Luna had been to Rarity's to take measurements for a hoodie of her own. Rarity was beyond excited, and had never made one before, much less for a princess. The throng of ponies entering the party parted for them, bowing respectfully. At the door, Pinkie Pie greeted them.

"Ohmygosh you made it! I hope you guys will like this super duper awesome speech party!" She squealed, bouncing in place.

Rick chuckled and Luna giggled.

"It looks great so far, Pinkie," Said Rick. "I cant wait to see what else you've come up with. I'm sure Luna will love it."

Pinkie smiled so wide that he was sure that her face was going to split open.

"I hope so! I hope it'll be so much fun for the two of you!" She said, giving a not-so-subtle wink to them.

Luna blushed, looking away, and Rick booped Pinkie. Her eyes crossing, she fell onto her back, and while she was distracted, Luna and Rick slipped into the party.

The main hall was littered with decorations, streamers and just about everything in between. The color scheme was dark blue and purple, to correlate with Luna, and there was a large banner above the entranceway that read "super duper awesome job, Princess Luna!"

The party had been going for about an hour when they got there, and as such there were many ponies standing around and talking, or sitting and eating some of the delicious snacks that Pinkie and Applejack had brought. When the pair walked in, the conversation stopped and all eyes turned to them. The ponies then bowed to the Princess respectfully, bringing a smile to her face.

"Please, no need for formalities, our subjects. Tonight we are but another partygoer, looking to enjoy the festivities. We hope that you all shall do the same." She said, giving the crowd a genuine smile. The crowd clapped and hooted, rising to their hooves and carrying on with their conversations. Luna glanced at the clock, taking note of the time she had until she was to raise the moon. 6:23. She would raise it in about 40 minutes, as she and Celestia had agreed. Until then, she fully intended to enjoy the party with Rick.

Rick, on the other hand, was slightly more nervous than he appeared. The party had hundreds of ponies, filling the halls. Trying to keep an eye on all of them would be impossible, but he was comforted by the fact that Luna planned on staying with him the entire time. Bumping him with her flank, she made her way through the throng of partygoers, stopping and chatting with them, and picking up numerous refreshments along the way. Pausing at a break in the crowd, Luna munched on a slice of cake floating in her magic.

"Careful, hon. Too many of those and you'll end up looking like your sister." Rick said, motioning to the cake.

"Oh shut up," Luna said around a mouthful of the treat. "You like my flank anyway."

She bumped him with her flank again, flashing a sultry smile.

"Maybe later tonight you can show me how much" She said, playfully flicking him with her tail.

Rick blushed, grinning sheepishly. "Maybe."

Luna giggled, and the two continued on.


Trying to follow the Princess and her guard had been nothing short of a nightmare for Light Step. Her saddle bags were bulky and cumbersome, and trying to move through the ongoing party was difficult. Growling in frustration, she sulked through the crowd, ignoring conversation. Along the way, she picked up a muffin. Eating it, she heard a voice through the crowd.

"I bet you I could make it out and around this castle in ten seconds flat!"

"Oh really?" said a second, southern voice. "Ah'm gonna have ta see this ta believe it!"

"Watch me!"

Without warning, a rainbow blur slammed into Light Step, sending her and her bags sprawling across the floor. Once she had stopped tumbling, she sat up and coughed, looking around for her assailant.

"Oh, snap, are you alright there?"

Looking at the source, a cyan pegasus with a rainbow mane looked at her, magenta eyes full of concern.

"Yeah, I'm alright. Just... please look where you're going." Light Step said, surprising herself with her calmness.

"Yeah, sorry about that. I, uh, didn't see you there." The rainbow mare said, rubbing the back of her head with a hoof and a sheepish smile.

"Don't worry about it." Step grumbled, looking around for her bags. Finding them, she walked over and was glad to see that the buttons held fast, keeping her crossbow and bolts from spilling out over the floor and getting her caught.

"What's in your bags, anyway?" The rainbow pegasus followed her.

"Nothing of your concern, just some personal effects of mine." Step growled, making the mare take a step back.

"Sorry, I've had a long day." She apologized, donning her bags.

"It's no problem, we all have bad days, eh?" The rainbow pegasus said.

"I guess."

"Anyways, I'd love to chat, but I've got some flank kicking to do. Later!" The pegasus flew off, leaving a rainbow streak in her wake.

Sighing, Step continued through the party, looking for a good vantage point.

Hmm. No, not there. Not there either. That could work... No, to many ponies. Dammit, is there any place here that isn't full of ponies?

While she was busy in thought, she failed to notice the large blue Alicorn directly in front of her.

"Oomph!"

Light Step stopped in her tracks as she ran face first into Princess Luna, stumbling back and falling onto her haunches. The princess giggled, and the towering form next to her let out a chuckle, before she spoke.

"Are you alright there, little one?" The Princess's voice was soothing, surprisingly so. Light Step was in shock for a moment at who she just ran into.

"Y-yes, I'm fine. I'm sorry, I didn't see you there." She eventually stammered, looking at Luna's bemused expression.

"No need to worry, we all make mistakes sometimes, don't we Rick?"

"Indeed we do, Luna." The human spoke in a deep voice, causing Step to look up, way up, at him. "Did you find the bathroom?" He asked.

It took her a second to realize that he was talking to her, about yesterday, and she stammered, "O-oh! Yes, thank you for showing me."

"My pleasure," He said. "Luna, we should get going, You raise the moon in less than 10 minutes."

"Ah, thank you for reminding us," She said. "It was nice to talk with you, miss...?"

"Um, Light Step." Step said, nervously.

"Miss Light Step. Until next time." The princess said, smiling and waving a hoof before walking off with the human.

Shaking her head for a moment, Step cursed her luck

I stop looking for one bucking second and run into motherbucking Princess Luna! How could I be so stupid!

Sighing explosively, she turned around and attempted to blend in with the crowd, making her way to a vantage point she saw earlier.

Hopefully she could pull this off without a hitch.

Hopefully...


Author's Note

And the plot thickens!(snicker:rainbowlaugh:)
Don't expect chapters to be out this fast, I got into a mood the past couple days and kinda just couldn't stop...

Next Chapter