Chapters My Little Pony: Fantasy is Reality
[Initialising: Creating New Save File]
I cracked my fingers one by one, getting ready to begin typing. Before me, a torrent was running on my computer screen, the game's download fifty-five percent complete.
Not that it would take long now. The download might have been three terabytes, but my bandwidth could make short work of that. I'd been excited to take a look at the new My Little Pony based RPG for a while now, itching with anticipation at the prospect of getting on there and causing some havoc for the corporate gods.
They'd been selling this game by the million for weeks now, marketing it as a fully interactive experience set in the middle of Equestria with the characters any fan of MLP would know and love. Due to how wildly popular the show was now, having graduated from a cult following to mainstream appreciation about nine years ago, there was no shortage of fans around the globe.
And their combined pockets were deep . Hasbro and their affiliates knew that. The toy giant collaborated with BrandMax Online to bring the game to fruition, using revolutionary gaming technology that allowed AI to function with the same level of flexibility and intelligence as actual humans—or in this case ponies—might, all while emulating their original show voices and staying in keeping with their personalities.
In simple terms, being in the game was meant to be the equivalent of making the entire world of Equestria one hundred percent real. I took a sip of my coffee, barely warm, watching as my download bar shot past eighty percent. My software was already open, my tor browser booted up and ready, every failsafe in place and VPN active to ensure that I wouldn't be detected when forcing my way into the game's main computer.
The plan was pretty simple, almost routine for me by now after so many similar jobs in the past. Put myself into the game as a virtual entity, much like a player does, bypass all game related restrictions and firewalls and locate the data caches for player information and account names. But stealing directly from the player didn't feel right, I never did that.
As such, the next step was going to be accessing the data banks and payment processes for all cosmetics and downloadable items and attaching a bug. That bug would undetectably feed a portion of any money spent into a virtual account while still giving the players whatever they paid for. The bug would only be taking a tiny amount of profits, around a third of a percent, and it was programmed to empty itself into a crypto converter every twenty-five minutes, relocating elsewhere and repeating the process.
The fun part was when it was detected. That's when it would shoot into overdrive, taking arbitrary amounts of money directly from the game servers and transferring them to random accounts as the developers feebly chased it. I called it my Locust, but with it, I felt like Robin Hood.
A single beep, and I saw that the download was finally finished. I downed the rest of my cup, swallowing the last dregs as I set it down and equipped my headset. Next came the VR glasses, which cosmetically looked just like reading glasses now. The beginning was simple: open the game's menu with my program running in the foreground, begin to fuck with the main console as I enter.
The title screen flashed, and it looked just like the show from before, the graphics of the game almost identical to the cartoon with the exception of a little added sheen. That said, there was certainly detail where the cartoon hadn't offered it before, extra dots of scenery and larger variance between characters, the little things that made the setting look truly vibrant.
I'd seen My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic before, even enjoyed it. I never had the chance to watch the show in its entirety, but I'd admit that a smile tugged at my lips as I clicked the start button and a very distinctive Rainbow Dash flew past my eyes, offering me a wink as she disappeared into the clouds. She looked so real that I already felt as if I could reach out and touch her, or even fly after her, and I hadn't even begun playing yet.
Next was a screen full of options, an image of Twilight Sparkle sitting in a chair reading the backdrop.
[Story Mode]
I raised my eyebrow at the 'Cheats' option, I hadn't expected that. That one and the 'Mission Select' were both greyed out, so I had to assume that they weren't available until I'd progressed so far in the story. 'Downloadable Content' was what I was here for, but I needed to put myself in the game before I could initiate step one, so I went to click story mode...
And hesitated. I just couldn't start a game before making sure the settings were optimised first, even if I was only there to steal and cause chaos. Well, and maybe enjoy the game a little bit too.
Ten minutes later, I was satisfied that each slider and bar had been set to the most optimal setting for my rig, and I was finally ready to progress. Casting the thought out with my consciousness, I felt myself pressing the story button without moving an inch. This took me to a character creation screen, and I couldn't help but grin at how intricate some of the details were.
Choose Your Race
[Alicorn: The most powerful pony tribe, the alicorn boasts a natural magic resistance and high intelligence, as well as high strength and charisma, but suffers from low willpower and terrible luck. Characters of this race are blessed with longevity and are hard to kill, but may have a more somber experience throughout gameplay due to them outliving other characters. Requires Gods & Immortals DLC pack.]
[Changeling: A cunning creature with the ability to transform, boasting high charisma and dexterity but low strength and endurance. The changeling can assume any form, but finds it hard to make friends outside of its race while being itself. Feeds on love, and uses it as a temporary stat-booster.]
[Diamond Dog: A race of miners and skirmishers, slavers and traders. High endurance and strength, but terrible intelligence and willpower. Diamond dogs receive a natural barter boost, and have reasonably high health, but are often short lived. Play if looking for a challenge.]
[Draconequus: A user of choatic magic. Mental instability is common in this race, and can lead to them performing actions without player control, but this is offset by their natural intelligence and magic scores being the highest of any race, as well as a decent score on charisma. Requires Gods & Immortals DLC pack.]
[Dragon: Dragons are incredibly powerful, the strongest race of all, but are seldom seen outside of their own tribes. Natural elemental resistances and high wisdom are other benefits of being a dragon, but expect to suffer everywhere else. New Game+ only.]
[Earth Pony: The strongest pony tribe, physically. Some are able to rival even an alicorn in brute physical strength. The longest lived pony tribe, their innate magic bolsters natural healing and allows them to recover from wounds faster. An earth pony is often able to draw on support from others in a large group, as they are the most numerous tribe. Apart from strength boosts, they are about average in everything else. A good first play.]
[Griffon: Unarmed attacks are naturally bolstered by griffons, but they're not the best kissers with those beaks. Charisma penalties apply when speaking to ponies, but dexterity and flight speeds are both high to counter that.]
[Human: Does this one need an explanation? New game+ only.]
[Pegasus: Fast and charismatic, this tribe of outgoing ponies are extroverted and exciting. Their flight abilities are rivaled by only the most talented griffons and dragons, and their charisma boost is the highest of any race. Low strength and intelligence are an issue, but at least you won't have trouble getting laid!]
[Unicorn: The most intelligent of the pony tribes, able to use their horns to produce magic and have a high willpower. Low strength, and endurance are all too familiar to the unicorn that spends their time reading, performing magic, and doing little of anything else.]
It wasn't hard for me to pick the pegasus option.
...what? Flying sounds like a lot of fun. It's nothing to do with the mention of sex, of course. As I pressed it, it brought me to another screen that asked me to pick a gender, and after a good deal of hesitation, I settled on male. (Interestingly, Futanari was also a DLC option.)
I began to blast through the aesthetic side of character creation, having fun with it as I changed every aspect of my character until I felt as if I had an accurate representation of myself, then fiddling with it a little more just for fun. What I ended up with was a pegasus stallion, a little taller than average with a large wingspan, a light grey coat, and auburn hair, along with striking brown eyes that I couldn't help but consider captivating. They weren't like the orange lenses I wore, but they were remarkable all the same.
No scars, no marks, I kept my stallion's hair short-ish and scruffy, no extra facial hair to speak of besides his fur. I made him twenty-two in age, and named him Space after my online alias. All of that done, it was time to finally look at the stats sheet. When I was finished messing around with it, it read like this:
[Space: Pegasus Stallion, Level 1]
[HP: 38/40]
It feels funny for me of all people to be playing a low intelligence character, but I suppose that's the fantasy element of an RPG for you. Satisfied, I was about to move on, but then I noticed there was an additional dropdown box labelled 'Extra Stats'. Curious, I clicked it.
[Endowment: 8.5"]
Jesus, that stuff was all catalogued? Hell, they had a fuckin' stat for the size of my cock, I never would have guessed that. Wait, was that small or big for a horse? Guess it was hard to even look at this as a kid's TV show or its derivative anymore, considering how largely adult the audience was now. If there was one thing that was a fact, this game certainly wasn't being marketed with children in mind.
And I was starting to feel increasingly eager to play it. Some juvenile, excited part of me, a hint of perversion there too, was beginning to forget the purpose of this download, the plan I'd been thinking over for days, even weeks now as I prepared the necessary material to break in and attack the system. All of that felt barely relevant at this moment when all I could think about was diving in. I was growing impatient for the beginning, wondering where it might put me and what it might feel like, whether it was as immersive as I had imagined, or whether I was just getting my hopes up for nothing.
One last screen, and it was time to pick a trait.
[Don't go yet! Before you head out there, let's give you something special to make life a little more interesting, okay?]
[Mare Killer: Plus 20% chance of positive interactions with ponies of the opposite sex (doesn't apply to alicorns).]
Was it just me, or did a majority of these involve sex or dating in some way? Was it really that major a component of the game? Not that I was complaining, I just hadn't expected so many stats to be completely driven towards it.
Considering the fact that I was a pegasus and had terrible strength, I decided to go with 'Been Working Out?', hoping it would come in handy later on. But hey, was I really going to be picking mares up during sex? Was I even going to be fucking mares?
Either way, it didn't hurt to come prepared. No loading screens to speak of after I hit confirm, and with a nervous heartbeat I fired my program into action just as I felt myself being thrust into the game.
I could feel an ache all around me, there was sunlight glaring through my closed lids.
It really felt as if I was waking up in a pony's body, it was so surreal... I opened my eyes to find that I looked exactly like I had on the character creation screen. I could see my body, feel it, but what I couldn't explain was why I was laying in the middle of a grassy bank with the sun baking me.
Or why a certain Rainbow Dash was hovering over me, looking particularly concerned. "Dude! Are you alright?!" She fluttered her wings as she drew closer to me, inspecting me all over. "I saw you hit the ground hard just now, looked like you were going at a million miles a second! What were you thinking, are you hurt?"
She looked completely and utterly real. It was amazing, as if I was really there. I couldn't even feel a connection to my outside body, but somewhere in my head I could detect the program of my own creation running in the background as it searched out the information of other players. Time to play along, I guess.
"Nah, I'm fine... Think I just took a bit of a tumble." I tried to stand, to stretch out my body, but the first thing I felt was pain shooting up my hooves. It wasn't excruciating by any means, but if I hadn't known already, I wouldn't have been able to say it was virtual.
"Whoa whoa, hang on there. You can't just get up like that!" Rainbow scooted closer to me, prodding at my hoof and jumping back with a flap of her wings when I winced from the contact. "I think you've hurt yourself pretty bad, dude. Let me give you a ride into town."
I looked down at my hoof for any obvious signs of fracture or breakage, but this just looked like a bruise. This must have been how the game tried to foster a relationship from the get-go, giving the player a potentially intimate moment with Rainbow Dash that was seemingly unavoidable. But from what I understood, she wasn't programmed to do anything at all. In fact, her and every other character in this game were completely fluid and autonomous, and it was up to me to work them out.
So I decided to do something a little different, forcing myself to stand on three legs and giving my wings an experimental flap. "No, I think I'll be alright... But could you show me the way back? I think I'm a little lost."
Rainbow looked a little relieved to see me standing straight, but it wouldn't shock me if she jumped out and tried to pick me up the moment I so much as stumbled. "Sure, dude, no problem. It's the least I can do to help you out."
She offered me her wither to wrap my hurt leg around, and grumbling a tad, I accepted. I regretted my reservations the moment I made contact with her soft, warm fur. It was like nothing I'd ever felt before, so snug and receptive to my touch. I was almost tempted to reach forwards and embrace her, like it was an instinct that had suddenly taken hold of me and snuffed out any semblance of rational thought.
Buttt that'd probably get me a punch in the gut. This was Rainbow Dash, after all. She didn't seem like the cuddly type. Keeping the touch to only a foreleg draped over her, we began to walk, and I marvelled at the lifelike aspects of the countryside the entire way. There was a sway to her body that made her feel that bit more real, and up close, she really was quite attractive.
"I'm Rainbow Dash, by the way. You're lucky I was around, you might have had a tough time getting back otherwise."
"Oh, yeah, I know who you are," I said by instinct.
"You do?" She paused in her steps, forcing me to do the same, and all of a sudden I realised how stupid what I just said was. What was I meant to follow it up with? 'Yeah, you're a character in a fictional TV show'?
Suddenly, a grin and a slight blush on her part. "Heh, you must be a Wonderbolts fan? That's pretty rad, dude. I'm still kinda shocked when ponies have heard of me, makes me feel all embarrassed 'n' stuff."
Jesus, what a save. Okay, I got one free fuck up, don't let it happen again. Nodding and smiling, I played along with her perceived explanation. "Yeah, I like to catch a show when I can, you've always been pretty noticeable, too. You've got some really cool stunts, y'know."
"Heh, seriously?!" Suddenly, Rainbow Dash looked away, clearing her throat. "I-I mean yeah, I know. I'm pretty great, and stuff."
Her cool air was so fucking fake and I knew it. Did I already have her on the backhoof? Come to think of it, I did have a really fucking high charisma stat as far as I could tell, and maybe it was influencing the gravity of the things I said? No, it felt like more than that, almost as if I was more confident here, better with my words than I'd ever been before. Everything felt so much more natural and had more character to it. Would I really feel all of my stats influencing how I acted and thought?
Suddenly, it dawned on me that I really needed to buff my intelligence if that was the case.
"Oh, by the way, dude, you dropped these." Rainbow held out a pair of lensless glasses, like the ones I used to send myself into the game, and instantly I recognised what they were. This was the game's counterpart, an accessory that allowed me to bring up my menu, stats screens and more.
Donning the glasses, I channeled my intentions and looked through them only to see hints of a heads up display that I could fully summon at will, as well as a menu that I could access at any point. "Menu," I said aloud, and while it did appear, Rainbow Dash looked at me like I'd gone mad.
"Uhh, we're not at a restaurant, dude. You're not blacking out on me, are you?"
"Huh, no, I..." Fuck, man, how was I supposed to explain blurting 'menu' for no reason? "I was just thinking about getting something to eat, that's all."
Rainbow still looked a little perturbed, but she gave me a slow nod. "I know a few places, if you want some pointers?" A few seconds hesitation, and she added: "I'm pretty hungry too, maybe we could go together?"
I looked away from the translucent screen I'd conjured to her, and she hesitated. "N-not like that, or anything, I just thought we could grab a bite, y'know? Besides, I've gotta make sure you're not faking being okay and aren't gonna fall apart the moment I let go of you."
I was about to nod and say that I thought that sounded like an excellent idea, even if half of the reason was that I needed to sit and think about what I was doing, but my attention was robbed by something very specific I saw in my options menu, a subsection labelled 'Achievements'. I couldn't help but give it a quick glance. I mentally pressed it, and what I saw made it almost impossible for me to keep a straight face.
[The Casanova: Bed each of the mane six.]
What's more, there was an arrow pointing downwards and multiple more pages of achievements that I didn't even have time to look through yet. One thing I could say with confidence was that I was never getting the Total Prick one if I could help it, I liked Derpy.
Seriously though, each of the mane six? Every princess? This was like a dream, right here, and as much as I wished I could focus on the task at hand, the whole reason I was here, I could feel my brain telling me that it wouldn't hurt to simply spend a little time with Rainbow Dash first, my plan would still be there afterwards, surely.
Besides, how could I not want to when she looked like that, felt like that?
My Little Pony: Fantasy is Reality
[Affection Quest: Romancing Rainbow]
I couldn't help but feel enraptured by the sights all around as me and Rainbow Dash continued our stroll through Ponyville. How the artificial and technological had coalesced to form something so close to reality, it was breathtaking, stunning, the kind of advancement I never would've imagined when I was a kid, but found myself in awe of now.
And to think that I was so integrated in this world that I already felt as if I was a part of it.
I'd taken my foreleg off of Rainbow eventually, opting to walk on it. She protested with her eyes, but managed to keep her concerns silent, thankfully. I didn't particularly like to be doted on in the real world, and that didn't change here. I could deal with the small measure of pain as we walked, but part of me wanted to spread these new wings of mine and test them out. Only, I imagined I'd get my head chewed off for even suggesting it, considering my recent crash.
"So..." Rainbow swivelled a hoof in midair as I walked and she hovered. "You from around here? I'm pretty sure I've never seen you before, and you look kinda distinctive, if you know what I mean."
I couldn't help but smile. "That a compliment?"
"Pfft!" Rainbow shook her head, almost too vivaciously. "You wish! I'm just saying... you don't usually see pegasi with a colour scheme like yours, they're usually brighter and don't contrast so much. You?" she looked over my reddish bangs and grey coat... "You look like a squirrel with wings."
The thing I hated about her assessment was that the puffing of my reddening cheeks probably made me look even more like a fucking squirrel. "Gee, thanks. You this nice to everyone?"
Rainbow flapped her wings harder, flipping around to face me. "Hey! I never said it was a bad thing!"
I could feel a snicker leaving my lips by force. "What, so you like squirrels, or something?"
"Hey, when your best friend constantly surrounds you with animals, you get a little fond of 'em, okay?!" I almost felt as if she was going to follow that up with a statement about how I thought I was better than her or a command for her to stop judging me, but she chose to keep with just the defensive stare and the adorable voice crack.
"Mmh, better a squirrel than a rat, at least."
"Y-yeah, you could've done worse." My eyes were drawn by that, and Rainbow Dash was already rubbing at the back of her neck. It felt as if she was into me in some way—this level of awkwardness seemed orthogonal to her usual behaviour patterns, but I couldn't be sure just yet.
I shouldn't push it, I still need to get my bearings. I had to admit, there was some allure in the idea of forgetting the whole reason I was here, the siphoning and the earning, and simply indulging myself in this impossible, fleeting moment while I still had a chance. "Well, if I'm a squirrel, just what are you?"
"I'm..." Rainbow rubbed her chin, her tail swishing back and forth. She mulled the question over with an elongated hum, and I found myself distracted by its faint, musical lilt. "I don't really know what I am. I'm just me, I guess."
It came to me right then, such a simple thing to say that I never would've usually had the balls to try, but it fit the moment perfectly. Can't hurt to embrace my character a little, huh? "You're not just you," I started, and already I could feel my words being bolstered by some kind of intangible presence. Rainbow reacted to my tone, turning to look right at me. "You're unique, I think. I've never seen another pony with all those colours before, it fits your loud personality. Only one Rainbow Dash, right?"
A small, hesitant smile appeared on her face, her body still, and she managed a slow nod. "I guess you're right. I mean, in a totally mushy way, but still. Gosh, you're uncool." She giggled then, and I felt the laughter infecting me, begging for an accompaniment.
We laughed together as we walked, her tail occasionally flicking against my side, though she never drew any attention to it, as if she didn't even realise what she was doing. Of course she realised .
So I flicked my tail back, and it brushed against hers, becoming slightly entangled. We both stopped, looked at one another with a shallow breath, looked away simultaneously, and exuded anxious laughter. I wasn't putting it on either, this was genuinely getting me just as worked up as it must have been her. My head felt fuzzy, still coming to terms with all that had happened since I arrived, and my companion seemed lost in her own little world, deeper in contemplation than you'd ever imagine Rainbow Dash to be.
So much so that when we finally arrived at Sugarcube Corner, both of us almost walked past it. We weren't even talking, it was a comfortable silence that was filled by the surrounding townsfolk's activities and the sounds of birds, the light brush of tail against tail, the occasional deep breath. Rainbow turned at the last moment, nudging my barrel and pointing towards the building. "You in the mood for something sweet?"
I honestly couldn't stop myself. "I've already got something sweet."
Rainbow gave me a smirk. "Huh, really? You sure it's still alright after the crash, though? You should check your saddlebags."
...wait. Hold on. What just happened? I looked to Rainbow, a calm, passive expression on her face, then back to my saddlebags, then back to Rainbow, then back to my saddlebags. It dawned on me then that my compliment had gone completely over her head. "N-no, I... Never mind. Shall we just go to a cafe instead? I'm in the mood for an egg and cress."
"Oh, sure! It's just that I usually come here for lunch."
I raised an eyebrow, slightly surprised. "To a bakery, every day? Aren't you an athlete?"
Well, a slightly-more-than-light punch in the shoulder wasn't exactly what I was expecting as a response. "Hey! I burn it off twice over! Just because I'm a sports flier doesn't mean I can't eat!" Rainbow puffed out her chest, fluffing her wings and pouting hard.
I felt as if I might have somehow pushed a button. Just style it out, it'll be fine. "Hey, I was only asking. I think it's pretty cool, honestly, that you manage to keep your figure so great and have a few treats regardless."
"Yeah, sure , and I bet you think you think I've got a bit of chub on me too, don't you?!" She was right in my face now, exhaling out of her nose like a bull seeing red, and I couldn't help but take a step back.
"No, don't be silly. You're really good looking, alright? Totally fit, no doubt."
"Hmph." She made a point of looking away from me, her tail pulled tight over her backside and rolling down until it nearly touched the floor. "You really mean that?"
God, she sounded petulant, like a kid in the middle of a sulk, and there was something inordinately cute about the vulnerability she was so clearly displaying. "Yes, of course I do. You're gorgeous." I thought about putting a hoof on her and giving her a light pat, but decided against it at the last moment. "Now, did you want to go to the bakery?"
Was she—was she biting her lip? "Hmm?" Rainbow snapped out of whatever that was, shaking her head. "Nah, let's go get sandwiches." A playful grin. "Your treat."
I nodded, only to realise that I was completely unsure whether I had any money on me. Fuck. Fortunately, I'd figured out a way to find out. "Great, it'll be nice to go somewhere with a good menu." At my mention of the keyword, my menu popped up in front of me, and this time, Rainbow didn't seem freaked out by it.
"I thought you already decided you wanted egg and cress?"
I shook my head, preparing a line of bullshit. "Hmm, I'm undecided. I'll see what I feel like when I get in there." That taken care of, I mentally pressed the 'Inventory' option, hoping to see that I at least had enough to pay for some lunch.
[Space, Level 1 Pegasus: Inventory]
[Bits: 1480]
Needless to say, I was quite glad to see that I had so much cash on me. I was also rather shocked to find the other items, especially the tenancy agreement. Highlighting it took me to another screen which detailed the address and location of a house my character had apparently rented in Ponyville, a second floor apartment in the eastern side of town.
Looked like getting lunch for two wasn't going to be so much of a problem after all.
Turning to Rainbow, I gave her my best winning smile, bleeding confidence. "I'll tell you what, get anything you want on me when we get there, absolutely anything. You helped me out with my hoof, after all, so you more than deserve it."
"We're hardly going to the Canterlot Heights, dude, I'm probably just gonna get a sandwich," she teased, a chuckle in the back of her throat. "But I appreciate it. You're a really nice stallion, honestly. I'm glad I bumped into you—well, more glad you didn't crash into me, but... ehh, I probably would've settled for that too."
The words warmed my chest, they felt genuine and lifelike, and once more I was shocked that this facsimile of a living creature was just that. She wasn't in that moment, that's all I knew.
Just as I was willing to substitute my own knowledge of the world for this idealistic paradise, pretend it all wasn't a dreamworld for a while longer, Rainbow pointed over to a nearby cafe, and a box of text appeared on my screen, dragging me back to the realm of lucidity.
[Rainbow wants to go on a kinda/sorta date with you! She swears it's just a simple lunch between saviour and damsel (you're the damsel!), but maybe, with a little luck, it could be a whole lot more.]
[Completing this quest will alter your affection score with Rainbow Dash as she comes to like or dislike you more! If you get your affection with her high enough, you might be able to take your relationship to the next level! Also, you'll get a little exp for your trouble.]
[But beware of upsetting her! Actions that lower her affection score definitely aren't going to get you that second, real date, never mind a chance to jump into bed with her! Think about your actions, and pay attention to the things she and other ponies say. Learning more about the world and pursuing further avenues of conversation will unlock new quests and lead to you meeting new characters, so go ahead and get involved!]
It was a lot of information to take in, and it flashed by my eyes so fast that I barely managed to retain half of it. That had to have been a text speed bug, no one could read that fast.
All I knew was that me and Rainbow were headed to a pretty intimate looking place, and it looked as if one of the game's functions was coming out to play here. It said something about how I acted affecting how Rainbow saw me, meaning that I'd have to try not to screw this up. It sounded as if the thing was geared to be exactly like a real life occurrence, only with the addition of points that dictated how positive or negative my results were. Instantly, I started to wish something like that existed for real life dates, it'd save me some wondering.
When I looked back to Rainbow, there was a translucent little 'affection meter' floating over her head, seemingly unbeknownst to her, and the current number was sitting at forty.
No freaking way. Well, if there wasn't pressure on me before, there definitely was now. Time to make this fluffy blue pegasus very happy, or watch my first in-game mission go down as a total failure.
Author's Note
Next chapter should see us getting further into the meat of the story. Also, I've been considering making this story somewhat interactive in future chapters, maybe leaving vague indications of character choices in future Author's Notes? Let me know if that's something you'd like to see, and thanks to everyone who read/upvoted/commented on the first chapter!
My Little Pony: Fantasy is Reality
[First Impressions: Treat Her Right]
It was hard for me to get used to that little affection meter floating by Rainbow. So far, it had been the only real reminder that I was actually in a game.
It still didn't deter me. Thoughts on my task were pushed to the side in favour of the moment, my only real interest at this second a want to succeed in my affection quest. Rainbow Dash had led me over to a table, taking point as you'd expect her to, and we were sitting together in silence as I mulled over the best way to go about this whole thing.
And that affection meter was... dipping. Really slowly, but it still was. Was she getting bored of me being sat there doing nothing? Lack of a pause feature was starting to become a little grating, but it made sense, in a way. Even though there weren't meant to be tons of player characters in a single world, the lack of any pause ability led to a more immersive gameplay experience. It didn't really feel as if you were there if you could just turn characters off at any given moment.
And right now, I needed to be working out how to turn Rainbow on . Or at least get her to like me more. She had a little hum to her as she began to tap her hooves on the table, and my eyes were travelling over her features as she did so. "Sorry," I coughed, grabbing a menu and beginning to flick through it, passing one to her as well. "I got a little distracted, you're easy to stare at."
Rainbow's cheeks reddened a little, and instantly that little meter pulsed green as it began to trickle upwards once again. I tried not to focus on it, wondering if I could even toggle it off. While it was helpful to see when I was going wrong, it also made me feel twice as nervous to do anything, considering I'd instantly know how damning the results were afterwards. "You're so terrible," she laughed, hitting my menu with her own. "Honestly, did you think that was a good line?"
I smirked at her honest response. She was right, it was totally shit, but I wasn't going to let onto that so easily. "Fine, think you could do better?"
Rainbow tilted her head, brushing her bangs out of her face as she 'hmm'd for a moment. Finally, she leaned forwards and flashed a confident grin. "I'd close my wings for you, 'cause I know you'd catch me."
The moment I raised an eyebrow, the kind of eyebrow raise that said 'what the fuck that's so corny', her surefire grin faded into something a lot more embarrassed, and she shied back into her seat. "That was..." I'd half expected dialogue options to come up, one saying 'terrible', another saying 'great' with 'lie' in brackets, but that would have been too little controlled, and the game made it pretty clear that the player decided everything. As I stalled, Rainbow waited, hinged on my coming words. "...interesting." I managed, finally, knowing it was a total cop-out. Fuck it, I could add a little more. "Has that ever worked before?"
Ooh , the affection meter just went red. Bad call. "I-I mean, a stallion said it to me one time and I thought it was pretty sweet..." Rainbow shrugged her withers, looking around the cafe with an awkward half-smile. "N-nah, you're right. It was pretty lame."
Fuck. A couple of sentences in and I've already managed to upset her, even if it was a tiny bit. Good thing I'd built up a bit of a rapport with her first, I probably had plenty of affection to burn. "Hey, don't worry, mine was bad too. Hard to think of suave one-liners when you've got a beautiful mare sitting across the table from you."
Green again! Hell, I was ping-ponging responses like crazy here. Poor Rainbow probably didn't know what the heck to think. Not that I was faring much better. "Heh, stop it!" She went to bat at me with the menu again, this time tapping my hoof. "Now come on, are we gonna order, or are we just gonna sit here and starve all day long?"
I rubbed one hoof with the other, trying not to marvel at how realistic the sensation seemed. "I mean, if you're gonna keep abusing me like that, I think we just might."
No red this time. She actually doesn't mind a bit of sarcasm. Knowing that at least helped me to worry a little less about walking on eggshells. "Well, if you want to starve as a sign of protest, go right ahead. I'm getting a... basil, tomato, and cauliflower cheese sandwich. You?"
"Mmh..." I tried to open the menu with hooves and found that once again I was more dexterous with them than I expected. I didn't really have to worry about adjusting to this body at all. "Egg and cress for me. Want me to flag down a waiter?"
"Like there's any need," Rainbow scoffed, before cupping a pair of hooves over her muzzle and shouting at a nearby stallion in a less than dignified manner. "Yo! Waiter! Over here!"
The poor colt almost dropped the half-empty plates he had balanced on his back as he turned to the source of raspy noise. "J-just one moment, miss!" The way he scurried and rushed was almost painful to watch, but Rainbow scarcely seemed to notice. Probably because she was spending most of her time looking straight at me.
...had I done something right?
The colt was back before I could ponder it, jotting down our orders as we made them and apologising more than once for taking even seconds to serve us. I couldn't help but wonder if it was something to do with Rainbow's emerging celebrity status, but I didn't push asking.
Lunch was a quick affair, by which I mean that Rainbow has no manners and totally scoffed hers. She didn't even try to put on a show of being ladylike as she ate. I kinda liked that. But to me, the most interesting thing about the whole affair—well, apart from the pony sat in front of me—was the taste of the food. It was honestly as good as any restaurant quality lunch I'd had at home, maybe better in some respects. Furthermore, it was really filling me up! I was somewhat shocked by how realistic all of this felt, the technology behind this game was surely a step beyond anything I'd experienced up until now.
And to think that I was only here to line my pockets...
It could wait. I was having too good of a time right now, and maybe I deserved a vacation.
Rainbow was rubbing at her belly with a hoof, looking as if she was attempting to fight off a belch. Honestly, with how she ate, it was a wonder she was so slim, but I supposed that's what such a heavy exercise regime did to a pony. Not only that, but splayed out in the chair opposite me like that, wings drooped... she looked so damn cute. Like something out of a lewd comic, but more lifelike. Not that I could see anything 'm-rated', that is to say... she had her tail covering her best assets, resting over her thigh.
I tried to stop myself from staring, but I noticed that the more that I did, the more she noticed I did... and it was still pulling that affection bar up. Rainbow really enjoyed being checked out, huh?
I essentially forced my eyes away when I started to feel my wings stiffening. I had no clue if that was a precursor to pegasus arousal or not, but I wasn't exactly looking for Rainbow to clock on and me to find out the hard way. Not yet, at least. "So... how was your food?"
"Eh, wasn't bad," Rainbow lied. She was almost definitely playing it cool right now, and I'd decided it was about time I cranked the tension up.
So I did what any crazy fuck looking for a swift rejection would do and scooted my chair over a little closer to her. She definitely noticed, even flinched a little, but quickly relaxed under my proximity. Even seemed glad for it. "You know, it's been a while since I've been able to just enjoy the silence with someone else," I said, gesturing towards her. "I usually feel like I have to talk and talk when I'm out doing something like this, but around you I'm a lot more chilled out. Thanks for that."
A blush. She fucking blushed! Ding ding ding, that green meter got brighter . "Heh... I know what you mean. Usually I'm spending all of my time trying to be impressive and... It's been nice being around you today. I'm glad I found you all bent out of shape 'n' stuff. Would've been a lot less fun if I hadn't had you to carry round."
"Well, maybe I can return the favour somehow? I'm already starting to feel better." Fucking suave . I was never this confident, ever. "Let me carry you home? Wouldn't mind giving my wings a stretch."
She was hanging on my words, practically begging for me to keep talking, and for a moment, I thought she'd take me up on my proposition, with the way her tail flicked and her eyes began to narrow, speaking a silent invitation... but at the last moment, she faltered, and made a show of shaking her head. "Nuh-uh, don't strain yourself, dude. I don't wanna see you put yourself out again, alright?"
I was actually shocked it hadn't worked. With my charisma buff making me sound so charming, with the rapidly developing chemistry between us and the way this 'totally not a date' was going... I think the most shocking thing was how disappointed I felt. "O-oh, yeah. I was only kidding, heheh."
Rainbow blinked. "You were? Because hey, maybe you can't carry me, but I'm totally down for you going back to my place with me after this. Could show you around, chill together for a while?" The way she phrased it like a question seemed so off-kilter to everything else she'd been saying. The confident, headstrong Rainbow Dash, sounding uncertain? Was she worried I was going to say no?
It was around here that it occurred to me that it was make or break time. Either I took her up on her proposition, prolonging the quest, or got out now. I'd probably passed already. I'd probably get the experience and reward, and going back with her might risk me screwing things up somehow.
But.
"You know, that actually sounds great. You got anything in mind for when we get back there?"
I mean, let's be honest, there was no way I was refusing an invitation like that. Come back to Rainbow's place to 'chill'? That wasn't an offer you passed up if you were in your right mind!
Rainbow bit her lip softly, raising her eyebrows a little as she began to run her tongue around her lips. Her voice came out in a nervous little squeak. "Oh, y'know... a little bit of this, a little bit of that... it'll be fun!"
I nodded pretty damn ecstatically at that. No doubt this was going to be a first afternoon to remember.
"And this is Tank!" said an overly enthusiastic Rainbow Dash as she invited me into the living room. "I thought we could play with him for an hour or two, if you're up for it!" Turning straight away from me as if I was no longer there, she began to gently stroke her tortoises' shell. "Oh, hey there, buddy! You've missed momma, haven't you?!" She had such an adorable glow about her as she doted on her pet, but...
This really wasn't what I had in mind when I heard 'chill at Rainbow's' for the first time. I turned to her with a slight grimace on my face, trying to hide my reluctance at the prospect of something as boring as playing with a damned tortoise. "Uhh, Rainbow?"
She looked up from her prized companion and apparently best friend in the whole wide world to look at me, blinking innocently once or twice. "Yeah? What is it? He's awesome , isn't he?"
"Y-yeah! Totally awesome..." I thought about how to phrase it as best I could. Didn't wanna upset her in any way. "It's just... I was kinda hoping we could spend some me and you time back here... and as completely and utterly cool as Tank is, do you think it's be like, in any way okay if we kinda... skipped out on the whole 'walking an animal slower than my disabled grandmother around the house for an hour straight' routine?"
The first thing I noticed was the fact that Rainbow Dash's affection meter turned redder than Mount Fucking Doom. The second thing was the snarl. The third was the smoke coming from her ears. "D-did you just compare Tank to a geriatric patient?"
Shit. Damage control, now . "Now, Rainbow—"
"I'll have you know that he's only forty-five, and he moves like he's still in his twenties!" She slipped from aggressive bark into soothing whisper in an instant, doting over her pet. "Don't listen to him, buddy. He's just jealous of your good looks!"
Right. Screw this. Fucking abort before it gets any worse. "I was just kidding!" I said in what I thought would be the most fake damned voice imaginable, but apparently that convenient charisma buff let me play off as an almost seamless lie. I chuckled. I patted her on the shoulder. I prayed to whatever developers might have been listening. "Of course I don't think your Tank is boring—"
"You said slow," Rainbow responded instantly, unimpressed.
"I meant slow! Slow or boring!" I insisted, patting Rainbow on the withers as I spoke, more and more, putting every ounce of bullshit I had into this, clinging to dear quest life. "Tortoises are honestly my favourite animals in the whole world, but I didn't wanna admit it to you because I thought it'd sound lame and... I was worried I would fan out too hard." I put on my most brooding face. "Like, I just got to meet one of my idols and find out they were an amazing mare today, and on top of that they've got an awesome pet? This is like a dream come true for me, honestly. Sorry if I dealt with that badly and it all came out wrong."
For a long time, Rainbow was silent. Just when I thought I might have irrevocably fucked things up... "You consider me to be an idol?"
"What pegasus doesn't at this point?"
Green. Solid fucking green like a glowstick made of happy Rainbow Dash. She made a god-damn squeeing sound. It was ridiculously cute, I wish I could've recorded it. She did a little dance, I could swear, and fumbled out all sorts of half apologies for almost overreacting. Somehow... somehow , I'd gotten away with that.
Here was hoping that an hour of playing with Tank helped me manage to crack Rainbow's shell in the end. I felt as if I was owed some pretty fucking good sex by the time this ordeal was all over.
And honestly? I was starting to wonder if I was in it for more than just the sex . Funny how your priorities can shift when you've got this much adorable pegasus in your face.
