The Chronicle of Curse Word

“Helllllllloooooooo! I’m here! I have it! I’ve got that last soul you wanted!”

“Ah, yes, it looks like you finally completed your task.”

“I’ve waited so long for this! I know it was… wrong, but… I’d do anything to be with my Cursey.... So, here. The last soul you asked for. Now, how does this work exactly? Do I just… appear next to her in the real world or does time sort of undo itself? Does this mean her appearance and stuff will change too? I never really asked for details… I guess as long as I get out of here, it’ll be okay—”

“You’re not going anywhere.”

“Wait, but I thought I would get to be with her, does this mean she’s coming here?! But you said—”

“I only promised that I would help you be reunited with your beloved.”

“Yeah, and she’s still out ther—”

“No, no… She’s actually been here the whole time. Right beside you, watching, waiting, longing… I finally have you, my little bird.”

“I-Ink! I-I, wait! No, no… no, no, no, NO, NO, NO—”

“Come now Magpie! Haven’t you missed me?! I’VE waited so long for this moment, to finally be able to reveal myself to you… Do you know just how torturous it was to watch you… fawning over HER all these years?!”

“But how?! What’s going on?! Where is he? Where’s the one I made the deal with!”

“Oh, that voice? Did you like that voice? Imagine if you will, hearing that voice while he performed all those… experiments. No thanks to you and that… mare, I was left to rot in that prison—”

“Please! Don’t come any close—”

“Do not interrupt me! If you hadn’t disobeyed me and run off all those years ago, none of this would have occurred! Prison and magical experimentation tend to have... interesting effects on the mind and body. All that matters now is that I can finally talk to you, my little, little bird… I’ve missed you so much…”

“No, Please! I have to—”

“Have to what? Stay with me forever?”

“But, Curse—”

“DO NOT EVEN UTTER THAT MARE’S NAME! She was the one who caused all of this, to the both of us! She brainwashed you and kept you away from me! It was her words that made me kill my own child! All of these terrible, atrocious acts are because of her! Do you not remember?! It’s been that long, hasn’t it! It’s alright though. We can still be together… I can still fix this!”

“I... “

“Magpie, I love you. I have always loved you… Why can’t you seem to understand this? I sacrificed my whole world to find you. When… Curse Word damned you the same way she damned me, who was here to give you hope? Who was the one to save you? You would have disappeared into nothingness if it wasn’t for me! This infused magic has been a blessing and a curse. I may have lost my physical form, but I was able to create and control this limbo for you. To keep you safe, away from her… Even without my physical form, I am still capable of taking care of you better than she ever could. And now, as nothing more than ink, I was still able to find a way… a way to bring us back together. You see, one soul is capable of solidifying my state for a few seconds, and so I had a brilliant thought: what would happen if I gathered an absurd amount of them? She was already murdering and maiming all those poor ponies, so why not put them to good use? And, here we are. You’ve gathered enough of them because of Curse Word’s horrendous deeds, and I can finally become whole again!”

“What… have I done?”

“I can feel it working... bones and skin and fur… FINALLY! I can be a pony again, fully restored! And you and I can be togeth— Wait… what’s happening? Why isn’t it-UGH! NO! AHHH, NO, MAKE IT STOP!”

“I-I… no.”

“ARGGGHHHH! WHY DIDN’T IT WORK?! I’ve scrutinized over this for years, ensured that every detail was perfect! So many countless years of crunching those numbers! THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO WORK!”

“NO! PLEASE! DON’T—”

“Oh stop it! It’s not like I can even strike you! I’m ink, nothing but ink now! That’s all I am! All I can do is… spread…”

“What are you doing?!”

“Hmm… Interesting… How does it feel, my little bird? To have me seeping into your coat, underneath your hooves, all over you? How does it feel to be one with your Beloved?”

“No! Stop it! Please!”

“Let yourself go Magpie! Don’t fight it; don’t fight me! We can truly be together forever because our love is stronger than—”

“C-Curse…”

“... Really? Still?! Even after everything I’ve done for you, for us, you still reject me? This is fine. You never did know what to do without me anyway, but it’s ok, I’m here now.”

----------------------------------------------------------------

How long has it been now… decades? Centuries? It doesn’t feel like all that long ago, but goddamn, it’s really been a very, very long time.

The years have been hard and the changes… severe, but nothing I haven’t earned I suppose. This old horn, rotted through and punctured with holes; my cold, monotonous heart, pounding through putrid flesh and mangy patches of hide; and only these jaundice yellow eyes to stare back from my reflection, the crimson irises aglow like fire. This immortality seems to be my own personal curse... for killing her all those years ago.

It’s not like any of this even matters anymore. She’s dead. There’s no point in lying to myself. It was so much easier in the beginning, believing that all I had to do was look hard enough and I would be reunited with her. Even as the decades passed that hope never waned… not until that last time I returned home.

How was I supposed to know that it had been 70 years? I didn’t fucking age, and that stupid bitch librarian… She was still there, running the library. I didn’t believe it at first. That old, wizened mare behind the counter… It wasn’t until she showed me her cutie mark that it hit me. The last remnants of hope withered and died with the realization that day.

Pony mortality isn’t as long compared to other creatures, and the body decomposes pretty fast if in the right setting. Ashes to ashes... dust to dust, you know?

Technically, I should be dust at this point, but no; here I am, standing in this amber drenched forest, looking down at this worn piece of leather, lifeless in my hooves. This… mask; the one damn thing that was supposed to shield everypony from my words. I mean, why else would I sew the mouth slit shut? I honestly didn’t want to tell anypony my stories, but what else was I expected to do to pass the goddamn time? It’s not like ponies would sit and even have a “normal” conversation with me, especially when… I look like this. They run screaming from me the second they catch a glimpse of The Lost Narrator… this monster.

At the end of the day, that’s what I am, right? This immortal, monstrous creature that ruins lives with her stories. So, why be something that you’re not? Isn’t that what my super, special talent really is? The real reasons as to why I became this thing don’t matter, because it’s Fate. That’s what all of this really is. I fucked up... and I was the one who killed her.

Do you know what’s funny though? This mask isn’t supposed to come off. This fucker fused to my rotten, pus-oozing flesh, and suddenly, the bitch peels off like nothing and ta-da: brand new fucking fur and flesh.

I keep unconsciously running my hooves over my renewed face, and bitterly pull away when I realize what I’m doing. It’s not supposed to be like this, considering the rest of my body is a still decomposing mess. I clench my teeth as a ball of anger wells up within my chest. None of this makes sense, and for this to finally fucking happen now…

Fate is just really screwing with me at this point, huh? Feels like she’s just bend me over and plowing me hard.

The moon begins to shine overhead and bleed through the leaves and branches around me. How did it get dark so soon? I should probably set up camp for the night. With a flick of my magic, flames erupts from the logs in the center of the grove. I settle down and stare at the wisps of flame, flickering in the air. My eyes begin to unfocus and I just let my mind wander over all the details of this new… development. Even if by some divine intervention I was restored to my former self, it’s not like I deserve something like this. There hasn’t been any form of atonement for my actions, and even if there was, that wouldn’t fix any of this. What’s done is done. Murder is and always will be the greatest mortal sin, so for this to be happening… well, we all know that monsters don’t get second chances.

No, no… after the hero conquers the villain and saves the day, the monster usually gets obliterated into nothing. What I wouldn’t give to just be that… nothing. For everything to just go black and my existence to cease. You would think that I would want to just die, because then maybe I could see her again… but I don't even want that. Fate wouldn’t allow that. I don’t deserve to see her again, especially after everything I’ve done. I mean, what would I even say to her if I actually got that chance?

No, to just dissipate into nothingness is all I crave at this point.

I blink and my eyes re-adjust as my hoof slowly reaches out to the flames before me. I watch the flesh sear and crisp as it blackens within the fire The stench of rotten, cooked meat fills my nostrils. I feel no pain as I continue to watch the tissue cauterize, chunks of fat beginning to fall of the limb and soon all I am left with is a charred, hollowed bone and hoof. I pull the hoof away from the inferno and stare. Warm blue energy appears around the ruined limb, coalescing over it and quenching the remaining flames as muscle, skin, and fur are reformed beneath its glow, but instead of looking healthy and lively, it’s still putrid and revolting.

Like I said, this fucked up version of Fate is railing me super hard.

Snap!

My ears swivel towards the sound as my eyes remain locked on the fire. It would seem that some poor, unfortunate traveler may have stumbled upon my campsite.

“If you’re looking for a place to rest from your travels, you’re more than welcomed to share my fire…” I shout from over my shoulder. “Just gotta listen to a story is all.” It’s seriously too easy to lure tired souls with stories and a warm campfire, especially now that I don’t look like a goddamn scarecrow. I mean, who in their right mind would turn that down?

There is no response, but the hoof steps continue their slow, steady, deliberate crunches, drawing closer.

“Ah, the silent type, huh? Guess that’s a good thing for listening to stories. Hurry up and come over by the warmth of the fire. It's always chilly during this season, and you don’t want to catch a cold.” Geez, this pony is taking for-fucking-ever. Seriously, I could have been half way through my story by now if this cunt wasn’t taking their sweet time. Maybe this pony is actually being cautious, unless they are trying to get the one up on me. That happens from time to time; idiots seeing a lone pony, thinking she would be an easy buck. Little do they know, Fate’s already beat them to it.

The hoof steps come to a crawl as they get closer. What the hell is this pony’s problem?

“Ok, seriously. What the fuck is going on over—” My impatience gets the best of me. I whirl around, only to be met with the empty clearing. I scan left to right, expecting for a figure to appear, but all I hear is the crackling of the campfire.

I sigh to myself, annoyed that I’m obviously hearing shit again, and turn back to the fire.

“Look at what you’ve become…” A pony’s voice echoes out from the trees before me. At least, I think it’s a pony. I can’t see anypony in the darkness of the forest. “You sit here, waiting for vulnerable ponies who only want a place to rest, preying on their trusting nature…”

“Yeah, and what of it?” This wouldn't be the first time, another overzealous pony trying to play the hero. Considering how many ponies I’ve damned with my stories, it’s no surprise when somepony who loves them comes after me.

“But preying on them isn’t good enough, is it? You weave cursed words, forever trapping their souls in a perpetual, spiraling hell from which they can never escape. You kill them, body and soul.” This voice… voices… their voices echo and bounce all around me. How is this even possible? I don’t see or hear anypony using their magic.

“You can’t kill ponies with just words. If that was the case, I could just tell you to fuck off and die. Considering we’re still having this conversation, your dumbass theory is fucking moot.” I laugh to myself. And here I thought my night was going to be boring.

“But isn’t that what you did to me?” A single voice whispers into my ear.

That voice. I could never forget that voice.

“Mag?” I whip my head around to the right, my heart leaping into my throat, and I am met with nothing… again.

I grit my teeth as I feel my patience snap. “Whoever the fuck you are, show yourself!”

“You have ruined so many lives and yet, here you are, lingering on without hope or salvation. What is keeping your tired corpse animated, Curse Word?” I hear hoofsteps again, except this time from every direction.

“I said show yourself!”I shout again as magic begins to coalesce and pulse around my broken husk of a horn. In my right periphery, a shadowy figure emerges from the bushes. I don't give the fucker a chance. Before it can take another step, a bolt of power erupts from my horn. Faster than thought, a black void appears from the ground and expands into a gaping maw of deepest ebony, engulfing the flaming bolt into its depths. I freeze and my mind goes numb as the magic winks out of existence. My magic, the same that has incinerated ponies whole and cleaved open flesh, even through armored plate… how can it be? How can that blackness just consume it…

The inky void slouches and writhes upwards from the ground, slowly revealing pink hooves… legs… until a complete form stands before me. I find myself face to face with a mare I thought I would never see again. A lump forms in my throat. I swallow hard, trying to force it back down.

Her eyes remain shut, a small smile playing on her lips. “You ruined me, Curse Word. You ruined me with your own words.” Her eyes slide open, and it is then that I realize something is off. As she moves closer into the light of the campfire, glistening yellow eyes glare back at me from within her dark violet mane. In the light of the embers, black splotches cover her once perfect pink coat. Wisps of ebony tendrils rise from the stains and lash out towards me violently, trying to strike. Without reason they freeze, slowly constricting back around her frame. As she strides forward, a trail of inky blackness remains behind, a river of nightmare ink left in her wake. Her haunting stare pins me in place… I can’t seem to break from it as my breath catches in my chest.

“This… T-this can’t be real…” I gasp. “You can’t be real.” I take a step back. No, there is no fucking way this is actually her. No, NO Fate! I know I deserve punishment, but not fucking this! How did she get here, and like this? What the fuck is wrong with her… Did… did I do this?!

“You found me, Curse Word..." Those eyes… they have me clamped in place. I can’t move, I can’t breathe! My words, my strength; it’s all gone! All I can hear is panicked screaming from inside my own skull, reminding me of my failures.

I didn’t find you! I couldn’t find you! You’re gone because of me! I will NEVER—

A sharp pain explodes between my shoulders forcing me down, pinning me in place. My head slamming into the ground snaps me out of my trance. I try to rise, but I can’t move. Glancing over my shoulder, I see a dripping ebony hoof shoving me into the forest floor. I struggle against it, but only slip and fall to the ground harder than before. The ink is spreading, beneath me, around me, consuming my body in its depths. It’s then that I feel them: wispy, inky tendrils beginning to wriggle all over my body.

“Mag! I’m mph—” Wet, cold, what is this? My mouth is forced open and pure darkness pours into my mouth and down my throat, silencing my cry. It’s joined by more, slithering and constricting around my limbs and through my coat as I writhe. Wait… They aren’t writhing on me… They are in me! I can feel my body distend and I try to retch; my insides slithering like a bag of snakes….full of those things! I can’t breathe, choking on them as my throat begins to tighten. My hooves begin to sink into the ground, into the dark depths of the murky, obscure, black mess.

I can’t fight it. There’s no point. Maybe Death is erasing me from this existence, and I can fade away into this void. Please, release me from this fucking Hell and just let me drown in this emptiness! Sweet Celestia, please let this end! Just fucking end me!

Just before the inky void consumes me, I catch one more glimpse of her: the image of my Beloved imprinted into my mind. At least I can say I finally saw her one last time.

But… her expression though… Did I see pain?

----------------------------------------------------------------

The faint, sweet scent of lavender washes over me. I take in a deep breath and it fills my lungs, spreading a warmth inside my chest. It’s her scent. She’s always smelled of sweet lavender. I remember times when I would be working on a story and she would try to sneak up from behind to hug or tickle me. Her scent would give her away though, before she got the chance to get close. Hell, sometimes it was so strong, the smell would engulf the room the moment she walked in.

It’s a bit odd though. The fragrance is so intense right now, like she’s next to me here in this darkness. Dear Luna, how I missed this. My lips curl into a faint smile as the distant sounds of… birds?

Wait. Birds. Why are there fucking birds here?

I try to open my eyes, but a gentle pressure keeps them closed. The world shifts and turns around me in a dizzying confusion, one where I can't find my bearings. Gravity suddenly reasserts itself as I flop down roughly into something soft… warm. I realize I’m laying on what feels like a bed.

The pressure on my eyes fades to nothing and I can finally open them; the light is blinding. I wince and reach a hoof up to rub them softly. I push myself up and glance around. Wait… Am I? I slam my eyes shut and shake my head. No… there is no way that's possible. I was just in that forest… Gradually, I open them again; nope, my eyes are working. To my utter disbelief, I’m sitting in my old bed, in the middle of my bedroom. It’s morning. The sun is out, pouring in through the window and the birds are chirping, like they couldn’t have a fucking care in the world. I glance down at my body and my heart nearly lunges out of my chest. My body… the skin is taut and fur soft to the touch. I catch my breath and try to process what is really going on. It’s then that I realize I don’t smell lavender.

“How in the Hell…” I fling the blankets off and leap out of bed, inspecting the room. It’s just the way I remember it. The bed, the dresser, the nightstand… My mind races. How is this logically possible? I gallop down the stairs to inspect the rest of the house. The living room, the kitchen, everything is just as I left it all those years ago. Nothing appears to be out of place… that is until I catch a glimpse of a picture frame resting on the coffee table in the living room. A lump forms in my throat as I pick it up with my magic, hoping and praying it’s how I remember it.

This picture… I know she and I are supposed to be in this, together. It was taken right after she moved in with me. She was so jittery and nervous, almost like she was terrified of overstaying her welcome. She kept second guessing herself so much around me. I could never understand why she was that. Hell, I was the one who insisted on her moving in. I mean, she was homeless at the time. How could I not offer? I remember that far off glazed look in her eyes, after she and I had finished moving what little she had into the house. Something was wrong, but I couldn’t nail it down, no matter how hard I tried. She just didn’t want to talk about it; she wasn’t ready to let me in. In a last ditch attempt to cheer her up, I pulled out the camera and told her we should snap a photo together; a little way of always remembering her moving in. She finally seemed to relax and came out of her daze when I pecked her on the cheek and snapped the photo.

I close my eyes and swallow hard. Things were so much simpler… back then… before I…

I lift the frame up to eye level and open them; the photo tauntingly reflects back at me from under the glass. I instantly feel the lump fall into the pit of my stomach. Of course she’s not in the fucking photo. Hell, there’s not even a spot for her anymore; I’m dead fucking center, just smiling back with a dumbass expression on my face. It’s been years since she’s been in this photo, or any photo for that matter. All of them in the house changed that fucking day I... Fuck, and to think I honestly thought things would be different for once. I shake my head as I place the frame down on the coffee table. Of fucking course it would be like this. I’m going to relive this reality over and over again, aren’t I? The one where I never find her. Where I… I made her stop existing. It’s been so fucking long that even I sometimes wonder if she was real at all. Maybe my mind is fucking fractured… maybe she’s just a mental fabrication. Am I fucking insane? Is this just my way of coping with everything? This immortality that I’m cursed with, the way Fate keeps fucking me over, I seriously feel like any fucking reality is possible now.

I take a deep, shuddering breath. This is fine. This is all fine. It’s not like I had any control anyways. Maybe I should just go back to sleep. At least Fate gave me a bed to rest in between getting fucked. I glance down at the picture one last time; it’s then that something catches my eye, something I missed at first glance. I ignite my horn and levitate it closer, when I notice a little black smudge on the lower edge of the photo. My eyes narrow as I stare at it for a little longer. Who spilled ink on this?

Knock, knock!

I lift my head and glare at the door. Really? I glance over at the clock. Who the fuck shows up this early? I have no clue what day it is, or the year for that matter, but whoever is behind that door can just sit and spin. I’m not answering the do—

Knock, knock, KNOCK!

Oh, it’s fucking on now. If this persistent ass clown isn’t going to leave until I answer the door, then I'll answer the motherfucking door. Trotting over, I feel a slight headache coming on. I fling it open.

“Look, I’m not...”

“Well, hello to you too, stranger.” My eyes widened as I realized who’s standing in the entryway. She… She’s here… right here. Her bright smile, her soft lilac eyes beaming up at mine; I can't take my eyes off of her. No fear or looming danger lingers in the air like before… It’s just her.

She’s real. She really is real.

Her head tilts slightly; her expression melting into confusion. “...of course I’m real.” She chuckles to herself.

I shake my head, not realizing I said it out loud. “Sorry, I -I mean, hello—”

Wait, did she just call me “stranger?”

My heart twinges with pain. I look away from her, trying to wrap my brain around what is really going on. Stranger… that’s not the right word. It’s a horrible expression that shouldn’t be coming from her lips. She’s supposed to be here, in this house, with—

“Is everything… ok? I can come back at another time—” She starts, but I abruptly interrupt.

“No!” I shout. God, I’m fucking this up left and right. I rub the bridge of my eyes with a hoof and take a quick breath, trying to soothe my nerves. “No, no. You’re fine. I’m sorry. I just woke up.”

“Had a rough night?”

“You… could say that.” I respond, feeling the edge of my nerves dull slightly.

“Well, I wanted to come over and meet my new neighbor. My marefriend and I just moved in across the street.” She points behind her to a quaint little house, across the way, with a white picket fence. I sure as hell don’t remember that house being across the street, but before I can think twice about it, the blood drains from my face. I try to grasp hold of the anxiety rising to the surface.

“Your… marefriend?”

Like a candle whose flame is carelessly blown out, her demeanor changes. Her eyes avert down to the ground, as if she’s ashamed and scared of my reaction. Her bubbly exterior just deflates, retreating back into her mane, as if trying to hide from me.

Wait, her mane is down? She never wore her mane down. She would constantly bitch about how it got in the way of her doing things—

“I’m so sorry. Ink said that I wasn’t supposed to go around talking about us, but since it’s a new town and I thought ponies wouldn’t care about two mares being together and—” She’s practically word-vomiting.

“Hey, hey! Slow down. It’s ok.” I cut her off, realizing she’s starting to back away from me and off the edge of the porch. “I… I could care less about that. I’m into mares too.” This conversation… what the hell is this?

“You… are?” She stops and slowly comes back to the doorway, revealing her face from behind her mane again.

“Yeah… It’s not that big of a deal. Besides, if anypony really does have a problem with it, they can go fuck themselves.”

She gasps and covers her mouth, shocked and taken back. “Hah… sorry, I just um… I’m not really used to hearing someone say...”

I cock my eyebrow. “Fuck? I’ve said it before in front of you, and you never cared then—”

“Before…?” Her eyes narrow in confusion.

“Celestia damn it,” I sigh and try to regain my patience again. “Nevermind, forget I said that.”

“No, please. What did you mean by ‘before’? Have we met?” She asks curiously.

I chew the inside of my bottom lip as I try to find the words. I don’t know what the fuck is going on. This has to be some kind of new reality… a new timeline maybe? Is that what happened? Did shit just reset? A timeline where she’s with some other mare and I’m just… here, alone and miserable.

Though, she is only with another mare here. She’s not missing. She’s not potentially gone forever. She’s just standing here, at least I think it’s her. It has to be. I’ve waited too long. Things are different and maybe this is a second chance, and the fact that she doesn’t even know me…

“Mag, I have to tell you something, and I know this is going to sound fucking insane.”

“Mag? No one’s ever called me that before. It’s… Magpie.” She corrects me timidly. “But how did you know my name… I don’t think I—”

“No, you didn’t. You didn’t tell me your name. I know you. We’ve met before, at the library, remember? You were working there because you had just arrived here.”

Her eyes begin to shrink into pin pricks as she begins to back away from me. “I don’t know what you’re talking… about.”

“Yes, you do Mag!” I shout, as I begin to walk after her. “I came up to you after I was done reading to the foals, and I asked you out. You were shy and unsure like now, but you weren’t always like this! You were fun and outgoing and you—”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Mag shouts back, making her way to the middle of the road. She fumbles onto the ground, tripping over her mane.

“And you never wore your mane down, for reasons just like that. Here, let me help you up.” I reach her and offer a hoof.

“No! Don’t touch me!” The words pierce the air as she shoves my hoof away violently. Everything freezes. Nearby ponies stop in their tracks and look over at us. Her panic-stricken eyes fill with tears as she stares up at me. Her hooves raise over her head defensively, as if to protect herself… from me. She trembles in fear on the ground as I watch her mane fall to one side, revealing what looks like a… bruise on her neck.

“Mag… What’s happened… to you? I’ve been looking for you for so long—”

“Step away from her, at once.” I hear a shrill, haughty voice sounds from behind me.

I whip around to see another pony, one I thought I’d never see again. Memories flood my mind as a small white and black mare stands before me. Her forelegs are planted firmly on the ground, like a viper coiled to strike. Her intense yellow irises stare back at me, scrutinizing the scene before her. They seem to glow from behind her jet-black mane. Not much has changed from the last time I saw her. A pang of guilt strikes as I wonder where her colt is.

She makes her way over, placing herself between Mag and I, separating us.

As I try to step around her to reach out to Mag, her voice comes out like ice. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

“Look, I don’t know your fucking name, but you—”

“I am Ink Dye, and I don’t appreciate you terrifying my marefriend.”

My mind reels as the name hits me like a brick wall. “You’re Ink Dye…? You?”

“Yes, you heard me. Now if I were you—”

“Mag!” I shout from over Ink’s shoulder, catching a glimpse of her jumping at my voice. I feel a laugh begin to creep up my throat. “This little scrawny bitch is Ink Dye?!”

Mag’s eyes are locked on mine, as Ink Dye begins to help her up.

I feel cold pinpricks spread across my coat as the pieces finally click into place. “I knew it. I fucking knew it! She hurt you, didn’t she?!” I shove a hoof in… that bitch’s face. “Why the fuck didn’t you just tell me?! So many sleepless nights, staying up with you, comforting you after those fucking nightmares… all because of this little cunt? I could have handled her myself! All you had to do was tell me… to trust me. I knew I should have pried more!”

“I… don’t know you…” Mag quietly says, retracting back into her mane.

I clench my teeth. Enough is enough. I channel power into my horn and shove Ink Dye away from Mag. Ink flails through the air, and I take a step closer. She cowers back as I come face to face to her.

“Mag, please... You need to listen to me. I have to tell you a story... about us… and how were supposed to be together...” I beg as I reach a hoof up to her face. Her shaking form remains rooted to the spot as tears flow freely from her eyes.

Just as I am about to start, I clear my throat and take a deep breath. It’s then that I realize… she doesn’t smell of lavender.

“I think you’ve told enough stories.” Ink’s voice crawls into my ear. Without warning, obsidian tears rip through world around us, melting everything into puddles. Mag’s form begins to dissolve and fade into the void as I scream out. No! I just found her! You can’t fucking take her, Fate! Not now! I know what I was supposed to do! I feel the inky coils wrapping around me again, dragging me down. They rend and shred at my new flesh, searing pain floods my senses.

Pain. Mind ripping, bone jarring pain. It’s been so long since I’ve felt pain, but this is beyond anything I’ve encountered before. The fur on my chest peels off in large swathes, rotting muscle and sinew burst from underneath as the illusion shatters around me. My muzzle and face burn, as if drenched in acid as coarse leather forces its way up from beneath my fur. A silent scream wracks my form as the agony of lifetimes washes over me in waves; the pristine fur of my former body raining to the floor in tatters. My shrieking quickly devolves into shrill howls as I inhale, feeling the frigid air impale my wretched innards. I wriggle and flail, trying to fight back, but the dark coils hold me in place like stone. The smell of rot and decay overwhelms my senses.

Soft moans and whimpers escape my muzzle as I hang broken in the dark tendrils’ grasp. Tortured moans and the sickly sounds of fleshy matter reach my ears. With effort I lift my head, only for my eyes shoot open in terror. My field of vision is a disgusting amalgamation of guts and gore, an endless nightmare mass of twisted pony bodies. Limbs twist and contort at odd angle, eyes bulge from sockets… or empty sockets are all that remain as they turn in unison towards me. Merciless unyielding eyes glower and pierce me as they cry out my damnation.

“Do you remember them?” Ink’s voice purrs as it reverberates inside of my skull. I clench my jaw and try to glance around me. “There’s no use, Curse Word. I'm the one in control here.”

“Wanna fucking bet?!” I ignite my horn, but soon realize something feels… wrong. The light emanating from it isn’t spreading as it should. The magic is just out of reach, like somepony is muffling it with a pillow. My magic wavers and fades before shifting into jet black darkness.

“Look before you, Curse Word… look at the pure devastation you’ve left in your wake!” A crimson glow spreads from beneath me, enveloping the piles of corpses in its light, spreading like a wave of blood. The rotten husks of ponies begin to stir, decayed limbs twitching in the blood-soaked brilliance. A unicorn with his own horn impaled in his right eye shambles past the torso of a gutted pegasus as one by one they rise, coming ever closer. They are deliberate and move as one, a cacophony of snapping limbs, splattering blood and broken bodies. Entrails fan out like small tails as the gory sea rolls towards me.

“All of these souls have been blessed by your super special talent, Curse Word! Did you enjoy reading them their final stories?!”

“No, I didn’t! I was just—”

“Oh, yes you did!” Ink’s voice echoes louder and louder with each word. “You had a choice and this is what it brought you. It wasn't enough to damn your silly, little ‘beloved’, you had to damn everypony else along the way as well. One has to think… If Beloved saw you now, would she even have the compassion and patience to love a murderer like you?”

“Shut up!”

“A killer who dismembers, a psychopath who deceives, a beast who rampages, a sinful degenerate like you who finds gratification in the slaughter of innocent lives!”

“Do you think I got off on killing all these fucking ponies?! I never wanted this!” I scream back, the sound of gnashing teeth and fetid corpses coming nearer.

“Your actions speak otherwise!”

“But this was Fate! Why else would—”

“Fate?” She giggles shrilly in my mind. “Fate is something for foals and fillies hiding under their blankets! It does not exist! Fate is just a sad excuse for the weak minded. Only ponies and their decisions exist. Their damnation, their pain is because of you! It’s your fault that she’s gone. It is your fault that all of these ponies are dead, and you will never find peace, because you will never find Magpie. Simple as that.”

“I didn’t fucking chose my own cutie mark, you stupid bitch!”

There really is no fate. This really is all my fault…

“I didn’t ask for any of this!”

No, but I didn’t do anything to stop it either…

“They were the ones who chose to listen to my fucking stories!”

But I didn’t have to kill all those ponies…

“None of this is my fault because I’m a victim of fate!”

This is my curse. I will bear it alone…

“No matter what lies you scream Curse Word, I can hear the truth within your rotten heart...” Ink’s voice echoes off into the distance as the corpses’ excruciating wailing drowns her out.

A faint blue light shimmers in the murkiness. It drifts in the air, moving closer to me. I watch it carefully, not sure what to make of it. It reaches my snout and lands gently a top it. The aura intensifies as it spreads across my snoot and over the rest of my body. I slam my eyes shut against the brightness as the glow engulfs me.

I feel a sharp tug behind my navel, and my hind quarters are yanked skyward as my limbs are ripped free of the ebony tendrils. The world fades into a soft blue; exhaustion overtakes me. Up, down… nothing makes sense in this void as I spiral along in the light’s warm embrace, surrounded by the sweet scent of lavender.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Sweet Luna, do I feel like shit. How long have I been out? My eyes slowly flutter open. I feel the cold slimy surface of the floor beneath me as I focus the rest of my senses. A murky void of indistinct grays surround me, fading to blackness towards the horizon. Picking myself up off the floor, I rub my head with a forehoof, wondering where the fuck I am now.

“It should be obvious at this point, Curse Word.” I don’t recognize this voice, I tense and slowly turn my head, glancing back over my shoulder. Of course there’s no one fucking there, there’s never anypony there when I fucking look.

“So, what's your story, cockwaffle?” I call back, annoyed. I brush off the murky residue from my cloak.

“Well, that was quite rude. You should be more cautious when addressing your betters...” There’s a smug tone underlining this voice and it’s irritating me to no end.

“You know what? I’m getting really tired of these games. Can we just speed up the process and get on with it?” A pair of humongous golden eyes wink into existence before me, ominous and looking slightly annoyed. I quirk an eyebrow as I stare up into the looming visage. “So where's the rest of you? Don't tell me they fucked you over as well? What's it like to need to shit, but have no asshole?”

“Please, do not bring me to your level. I thought the only victim here was you; that you were merely at the whim of the forces around you.”

“Oh, shut the fuck up. You don’t know shit about me. And who the fuck are you to tell me what I think?”

“My name is not worth mentioning to pathetic wretches such as yourself. All that matters is that I have a deal to offer you…” The voice calmly states.

“A deal? One second you’re talking back to me, and now we’re bargaining at the Tartarus flea market? Where the fuck do you come off?” I retorted.

“Oh, how amusing. You mask your fear with arrogance, but still wonder if it’s the devil himself you’re mouthing off to. No, no, I’m just someone who has lurked and watched the world play out from a distance, biding my time. Watching and waiting patiently because of my own… complications.” A hint of bitterness drips off that last word.

“Complications? Well I guess it would be hard to get laid without the right equipment, huh?”

The eyes narrow and I can feel hate radiating from them. A moment passes and a small sigh escapes from the floating orbs.

“I am here to offer you a chance… Something I’ve only offered to that other mare who was trapped in this void for so long.”

“Other mare? What other—”

“As I said, this is a chance I don’t grant to many. I don’t hand out offers every day. Only in very special cases do I ever offer this…”

“Alright, alright. Get on with it, tell me what fucked up door prize your offering me for attending this nightmare party?” I gloat.

“What if I told you I could finally make it all go away, the pain, the loss, the regret… Everything?”

My body stiffens. “The Hell you can—”

“I said don’t bring me to your level Curse Word. I do not tell lies. In this world, I'm in control and can erase anything I chose.”

“What do you mean by ‘erase’?”

“Do I have to explain everything to you? Remove, eradicate, to wipe away. It's no feat for me to remove garbage like you if I so choose.” My eyes narrow, unsure of what to make of this as the voice continues. “That is what you want, right? For it to end... To become nothing? Wasn’t that what you were blubbering about by the fire, before you were pulled into this place?”

“What’s the catch?”

“No catch. None at all.” The voice states nonchalantly.

I swallow hard, extremely skeptical of what’s being presented. “... It’s not that fucking easy.”

“Oh, but it is! You would finally be released from this existence, from the endless search for her. We both know you can never find her, no matter how many centuries pass. And wasn’t it you who stated that ‘Nothing compares to the loss of a Beloved?’ It’s what you truly want and you can finally have it: relief from this world and all of its fallacies of ‘true love’. Just accept my offer, and I can take it all away.”

My heart thuds in my ears as I watch those gigantic yellow eyes narrow at me, willing me to accept, to give in. Could I really be free of this pain? No more sleepless nights plagued with guilt; remorse and sorrow consuming my waking hours. I can’t be rid of it on my own. I can’t blank those feelings. They linger and burn through me, festering like rot until all that’s left is a hollow cavity of nothingness and I only have myself to blame. This is what I've wanted, craved for so long… This release... Having it thrown on a silver platter like this though… something doesn’t feel right. It wasn’t wrong about Mag though, it’s not like I could find her now. It's not like I have anything else to lose.

She’s dead. She has to be dead… My stomach churns and a fluttering sensation rises in my rotten heart. She has to be dead, right?

When the fuck did I start doubting that she’s dead? I mean, she’s supposed to be dead, but this… feeling. The scent of lavender, her lilac eyes… my heart quivers and twinges at those memories. A sensation swells inside of my chest, one that I haven’t felt in so long: hope. How could I forget this, what it really meant to love her? When did I forget what she meant to me? Doesn’t matter now, there’s no way I’m gonna let it go again. I love her, there's no denying it. The real question here is why the fuck does that thing want me gone so fucking bad?

I glare up at the golden eyes, cogs turning in my head as I try to make sense of all of this. Even if she was dead and I’m damned to remain like this for all eternity, I will never give up my search for her. I’m so fucking tired of this shit, of being fucked with and played. They can tear me apart, pull me down and drag out this pain but I will never stop. It’s my fault she’s gone, and by Celestia's burning mare heat, I will figure out a way to right this wrong, so fucking help me.

I shake my head, a rictus smile stitching across my face. “Hey, Piss-eyes! You can take your offer and shove it up your non-existent ass!”

A low rumble shakes the world around me, as the yellow eyes bulge and warp, exuding anger and resentment. A deep growl emanates from the direction of the eyes, warping and distorting into the shrill shriek of a high pitched, obnoxious voice.

This time, instead of the previous lower register voice addressing me, I am greeted by the spiteful tone of Ink Dye’s cunt voice. “You really are a persistent pain in my hindquarters, Curse Word. I will squish you under my hoof like the cockroach you are.”

“The only cockroach around here is you. Of all the ponies I cursed, why is it a cunt like you, who actually deserves to get her shit kicked in, that’s the one endlessly bitching me out?” I grit my teeth and watch as the eyes begin to rise. It's not until I see the dripping tendrils opening from within the darkness that a cold chill runs down my spine. The cavernous, gaping mouth grows wider, lunging towards me. Inky coils lash out as I turn to run, grasping my cloak and back hooves and yanking me to the ground. I scream and claw at the slippery earth as they drag me mercilessly into the gooey, gaping orifice poised to consume me.

“Luna damn it! I'm so fucking tired of these tentacles!” I grouse before they drag me in, submerging me in the onyx sludge.

A last thought occurs before my mind fades into darkness. … At least I never gave up, huh?

----------------------------------------------------------------

I slowly drag my hooves down the walkways of this town. I have been so mentally exhausted as of late; it’s a miracle that I’m still finding the strength to make it to work. It’s the same old thing, each and every day: get up, go to work, come home to her, rinse and repeat. It seems like all I ever do now is work. The long, unending hours… so I can provide for the both of us. She gets to stay home, fritter away her time on her stories.

Coming back to a nice home cooked meal should not be too much to expect. What could she possibly be doing all day that it would be too difficult for her to ensure something is prepared by the time I get home? The lack of understanding on her part drives me up a wall. It’s happened too many times this week alone. She doesn’t appreciate the amount of time and effort I put into this life for us.

A sigh escapes my lips as I approach the front of our home. Living in this city, especially at the station I occupy, a good number of luxuries are to be expected. It's a shame that noble ponies of such standing cannot recognize my place among them.

Noble ponies? I read to fucking colts and—

I reach the door and open it with my hoof, stepping inside. The familiar sights of our lush interior greet my eyes. They peruse the lavish furnishing and finally come to rest upon my little bird. She looks as gorgeous as ever, her long luscious mane down. She seems startled by my presence, turning around suddenly, wide eyed and… frightened.

“Oh! You’re home early! I-I didn’t think you would be home this soon. I still had a lot to finish up. Like cooking up—”

“Cooking? No, this does not look like my dinner… What is that you are hiding?” I sneer as I hang up my scarf on the nearby coat rack.

“That’s your Hearts and Hooves day present. I-I wanted to get you something… nice.” I trot over, watching her carefully. The silly notion of this holiday had slipped my mind, especially with all the hours I have been working. She turns her gaze to the ground as I examine the wooden box resting on the table behind her. It is a simple wooden box, crudely worked. It appears to have a black drop shaped inlay in the center, as sad imitation of the prestigious mark upon my flanks. She continues, “I had some extra funds stored away, and I wanted to surprise you with—”

“You’re hiding funds?”

“No, I wasn’t hiding it from you. I just had it stored for—”

“For what Magpie? How did you even get the funds for this? You’re working some side common job under my nose again, aren’t you? Did you forget that I provide everything you need? It’s not enough that I work my hooves to the bone for us. No, you have to spit on that, working like a common mare.”

She shrinks under my words. “I just wanted to get you a new quill and scroll set. You’ve used that other one for so long. It looked worn down, and I just thought—”

“That's always the problem, Magpie. You tend to think when it isn't your strongest feature. You are still the same, pathetic naive mare I found. Just look at this garbage! Did you really think I would enjoy having this trash, cluttering up our home? That money could have been used for something else, something of worth! Do you even know how much this beautiful house costs? To live in this city?! Of course you don't! Just like you can't fathom what it would mean if you were seen purchasing this! Did you tell anypony who you were getting this for? The last thing we need is for any of the ponies in my circle finding out that we’re…” My brow knits into a frown as I catch my breath from the exertion. “You weren’t thinking, per usual. You never do.”

She hangs her head; her eyes glued to the ground. “No… I wasn’t thinking. I should have told you about the money. I’m sorry. ░░░░, I didn’t mean to upset you, I just… I wanted to do something special for you.”

“Something ‘special?’ Do you even understand how stupid that sounds? I’ve already told you what I expect of you, and trash like this is not anywhere on the list! You are supposed to stay at home and enjoy all of this! You literally have everything you could ever want. Why do you continuously disregard my wishes!?”

“░░░░, please, I didn’t mean to make you mad. It was just a gift!”

“Just a gift?! This stupid little box could have cost us our future! I have worked too hard to let some old, bigoted aristocrats take away everything I have labored over because of your incompetence.”

Why am I so angr—

My fur bristles, but I take in a calming breath, refusing to let her stupidity ruin all of this. My little bird just needs to be put in her proper place. What pony would not want the riches, the glory… even if we were only ever seen as ‘best friends?’

Best friends?

I grip the box in my hoof, offended by the touch of such rough hewn filth beneath my fur. Her eyes fill with a panic and a jolt of excitement runs down my spine and between my flanks, my heart beginning to pound in my chest. I need more, so much more of her, of my little bird. I hurl the box at her chest, anticipating the impact, the delicious scream to follow. Instead, my ears are greeted with the sound of it, the box shatters against the hazy blue field as my vision shifts to red. How… DARE she… How dare she use IT… here… in my home! She will regret breaking my rule!

My rule? What the fuck is going on? I’m better than this! Stop—

“I’m sorry! I-I didn’t mean to use my magic here. I know you said to never use it, I just—”

I silence her with a quick strike across the muzzle, dazing her. Her front legs buckle and she strikes the floor with a meaty thump. Her legs curl in defensively as she whimpers and my body responds at once. She has a lesson to learn though. Soon...

Stop it! Mag! You need to run now! Get away from me! No! Stop it!

“I’m sorry ░░░░… I just wanted to make it a special holiday. I promise I’ll never do it again.” She sobs, trying to back away from me.

“Oh, but I know you’re going to do this again! You never see the whole picture, and it’s time I finally made you realize it!” I loom over her crumpled form as she cowers in fear from my very presence.

My hooves pin her firmly to the floor and the blood rushes to my head—

No! What the fuck am I doing!? I would never—

... she continues to cry out in pain, it excites—

No, this isn’t how it’s supposed to feel! Mag! It's not me! I wouldn’t—

The sweet satisfaction of hearing her scream like that. I’m so close—

I can’t control it! Stop! Please fucking stop! I don't want this! I'm going to be sick!

… Cursey…

Mag?! Is that you?! I’m sorry! I'm so sorry! It wasn't me! I wouldn't...!

I know… All you ever did was love me...

I can’t stop it! I can’t control my body! I don't want to hurt you, ever!

Cursey... This isn’t you…

What?

Time stills and blue light engulfs my consciousness. Numbness washes over my limbs. A fuzziness creeps over and blurs my senses as the weightlessness sinks in. Pained wails fade away as a cold, solid surface rises to meet my sweat-drenched body, cradling me in its cool embrace. I lay there, unmoving, trying to catch my breath. All I want right now is bury my head in my hooves; I don't want to feel anything.

I’m done. I’m done with this fucking bullshit. What the fuck was I doing in there? Just… why? This doesn’t make sense! I… I laid my hoof on her. I hurt her… and I—

Nausea overpowers me, and I retch. Bile burns my throat and covers my muzzle. My insides knot at the thought of my hooves on her like that. Those panic-stricken, tortured cries… and my body… why did I feel like that? I… I-I liked that…

My stomach churns and seizes, and a wave of bile explodes from my mouth again.

I… I really am a monster.

“No, you’re not!” A voice calls from behind.

That voice… her voice. Why has it come to haunt me now? I don’t respond, curling deeper into myself, burying my face in my hooves.

Hoofsteps approach, frantic and quick. “Cursey! Please, get up!”

No, please… Just stay away from me. I can’t do this anymore! I—

“Cursey!” A pair of pink hooves yank me out of my thoughts, turning me around. A tingling, warm sensation encircles my form and tenderly washes away the grim and bile and soothes my nerves. The sensation fades and dissipates as she pulls me close. I breath in the sweet scent of lavender as I bury my face in her chest. She softly strokes my mane, rocking back and forth as she grasps me tight against her chest floof, refusing to let me go. I rest in her embrace, trying to comprehend what’s happening…

Is this really her…?

My eyes find her and my heart catches in my chest. Her lilac eyes are warm and smile down at me. This is how I remember her: her mane up in that silly little bun, locks of hair falling gently behind her; her smile so bright and calming, joy radiating from it. Her eyes brim with tears as she brushes a hoof softly across my cheek.

“I’m… sorry.” I mutter as I watch the tears fall, landing pitter patter on my snout. The droplets dampen my fur. “I hurt you… and I fucked up so much… I don’t even know if you’re real right now... because of this place, but—” I’m cut off as her lips meet mine. My body stiffens and relaxes. My barrier drops; I feelthis... I feel her. It is her. It really is Mag. Her sweet taste on my lips, her hooves pulling me close… I almost forgot what this felt like. I’ve been without her for so long, but I could never forget the way her lips feel on mine. Tears sting my eyes as I hold on to her, grasping her for all I’m worth.

The pain, the doubt… fear and regret… It’s been so much. Everything I’ve had to endure… but it led me to her... to this moment.

I found her.

She pulls away slowly and laughs breathlessly. “I should have magicked you a breath mint.” She chuckles, wiping away a few tears. I relax my grip and lean back, so I can sit up and face her. Mag’s expression drops. “Cursey, look at me, I don’t have much time. She’s trying to break you. I fucked up, Curse, and I can’t stop her, but you can still get out of here. I can help you get out of here.”

“There’s no fucking way I’m leaving you.” I grip her tight, my eyes locked on hers as I try to understand what’s going on. “What do you mean you fucked up? I don’t understand…”

Mag swallows hard and looks away. She rushes to her hooves and begins to pull me along. “We don’t have time to talk about—”

“YOU UNFAITHFUL SLUT!” An inky coil slashes out from the darkness twisting itself around Mag’s head, muffling her screams. She’s ripped from my grasp, her pin-pricked irises the last thing I see before she disappears into the darkness.

“MAG!” I wail, dashing after her.

Give her back you fucking—

“Where do you think you’re going?!” A single slimy tendril whips out from my left faster than I can dodge. It blooms and forks into a web of tendrils before enveloping my left flank and side; pain shooting down my nerves in jolts . The tendrils burrow and scythe into my flesh, yanking and pulling viciously as chunks of hide and meat rain to the floor. The black web spreads like a cancer, tearing and peeling as it consumes me. The fiery agony engulfs my other senses becoming my entire world as I scream out in pain. My body collapses in a spasming heap as the tendrils finish encircling me; squirming and writhing over my fur and flesh and creating festering wounds. Over my frantic screams, I hear her.

“Ink! Stop it! Leave Curse alone!” I rally my resolve and what little strength I can muster to turn towards her voice. I see Mag… shouting and... screaming... and... I think… she’s reaching out? The waves of pain distort my vision, vertigo encases my brain and my hearing fades in and out… I could've sworn she said—

“Oh, she did say that name, Curse Word.” The pain lessens from a raging inferno to lines of burning embers as the writhing mass of inky blades cease carving me apart. I hang limp as they lift me into the air, the ones around my neck flexing and contorting until I'm face to face with… it. Yellow orbs practically drip with disdain as they peer into my soul. My eyes flutter as I struggle to keep them open. Two inky tendrils slide beneath them and over my eyes, prying them open. I stare at the nightmare before me: a swirling sea of ink writhes and undulates around its form with inky tentacles rising rhythmically from the surface. Wings… I think they’re wings… jut out from just behind where its shoulder should be. They look like… dark pinions akin to feathers….quills maybe?

I choke down the rising terror in my gut and force out, “W-who the fuck are you?”

The rippling inky void nears mine and a smile slowly emerges below those yellow portals from hell; pure darkness is all that greets me within that gaping maw. The breath that emanates from within smells sterile, almost chemical, but also familiar. Cold and sharp, it stings the open wounds on my face.

“I am Ink Dye, Curse Word.” It speaks with chilling mirth, as an inky hoof slashes across my chest. It contorts into a mass of slicing inky blades, before thrusting into my chest cavity. “And you created me.”