The Best Troller In ALL Of Equestria

"We're no longer really able to give a meaningful definition of reality, are we?"

The sounds of sloshing water, and the whistling of a cold breeze continuously ringed in Celestia's ears. She trotted closely next to her sister, her vision slowly adjusting to the darkness. There was a calm in the air despite the sounds, and the disturbing smell. She felt as if this could possibly be the last normal trot she'd ever really have.

"Luna?" she asked, her voice echoing in a way that hardly seemed real. "I just wanted you to know... whatever happens, you're always going to be my beloved sister, and that even though we've been through a lot, and even though we're still not done... Won't be for a long time, the way things have been going... Just wanted you to know, I'm going to make this right. I'm going to find a way to fix everything. Even if it kills me."

Luna simple nodded, and looked at Celestia through a hazy fog. "How could you fix this, though? We won't ever truthfully know just how many worlds Trollestia has corrupted. Even if she tells us that we've cleansed them all, we can't believe her, can we?"

Celestia gulped, and pointed out, "How could we ever trust somepony such as her?" She then asked a question that would repeat itself every so often in her life. "How did she even get that way?"

Luna offered, "It couldn't have been natural. Another good question is, what do we do with her once this is over?"

Celestia gulped, and even though she wished to skip that conversation, she knew it was something she'd have to take care of eventually. She stopped before a ladder at the end of the sewer, and revealed, "If I have to, I'll sentence her to death myself."

They both then ascended only to arrive in the most divine, and elegant throne room they'd ever seen. The trap door was located right behind the throne itself, and the two rounded the seat to get a better look at everything. In the middle of such eastern greatness, Celestia and Luna both relished at the architecture all around them. Luna commented to her sister, "We're no longer really able to give a meaningful definition of reality, are we?"

Celestia shook her head, and said, "After all of this, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised to find out that none of this is real." They both peered down each of the halls, and Celestia commented, "If it's anything like the original Canterlot, then my room would be this way. We can only guess that whatever Trollestia has brought here, searching my quarters first would probably be the most logical thing to do."

Princess Celestia took off, and despite this palace being much more decorated than her own, she also noticed very few ponies guarding it. "This makes for an easy investigation, but why the lack of able steeds?" Celestia asked in her thoughts.

Luna followed along, but her sister seemed hurried. She kept her pace at a quick, steady beat. "Wait for me," Luna finally said.

"Very well," Celestia chimed even though she barely slowed down her speed at all. They went by what would've been Twilight's secondary room, but saw it was instead in use as extra space for simple storage. They also would be tempted to see what the library looked like, but neither allowed themselves to be distracted. They eventually reached the end, and entering Celestia's other worldly room, they both could see very little difference. In fact, Celestia's room was probably one of the most familiar sights in this whole universe.

There were only a few things that were off, such as all the golden tapestries hanging on practically all of the walls, and there were small statues of elephants placed about here and there. Celestia searched the left side, and then the right side, but she didn't find much of anything herself. However, Luna had already spotted something, and had been staring at it from the moment she entered. it seemed even more out of the ordinary than the tapestries, and the elephant statues. Before Celestia's bed, sitting with a blanket covering it was a basket big enough for a grown colt.

Luna came up to it right after Celestia had finished her turn. "Sister?"

"Yes, Luna? You found something? Because I didn't find anything."

As the mare's blue hoof unveiled the blanket, the two of them gasped. In the basked was a fast asleep baby dragon. Spike lifted his head, and looked at the two with raised eyebrows. "Y-you couldn't be... Could you?" he asked, pointing a finger.

"Spike? You're who we're here to save?" Celestia asked.

"What?" Spike asked, getting out of his basket. "I've been missing for about two months now, and nopony's wondered where I've been? Not even Twilight?"

Celestia said, "On the contrary, Twilight's working hard as well to restore everything to normal, too. We knew you were gone, but what we didn't know was how to go about searching for you."

Luna came up to Spike. "We're actually here because we were told where to find you. Trollestia teleported you here as a prank, and-"

"No she didn't!" Spike spoke up suddenly. "Nopony could've even see me! She did manage to snag something important looking, though."

"Wait," Luna commanded. "If we're not here to retrieve you, then just who are we supposed to be saving?''

Spike blinked with a confused expression, and said, "What do you mean, who? Like I said, there's no way Trollestia saw me when I jumped into her portal while she was delivering whatever she had picked up."

Celestia's ears perked at this, and she then asked, "What did she deliver, Spike?" She then held her chin, realizing, "Trollestia didn't say somepony... she said something, didn't she?"

Spike scratched the back of his head, and said, "I can't describe it to you, because I don't really know what it was. Y'see, I was delivering some books about old world fashion that Rarity wanted to read up on. That's when the sun was rising in the form of a... Well, you know. I was busy taking care of the library while Twilight was away at Canterlot, if you recall, and during that travel, Trollestia showed up. She..."

"Yes?" Celestia asked eagerly.

"She began chasing this old, little pony from south eastern Equestria around town, and eventually made him fall. He dropped some red, and black rock."

"Rock?" Celestia asked. "That's the best way you can describe it?"

"It looked... like a carving of an alicorn."

Celestia gasped, and Luna asked her, "You don't think it could be...?"

Celestia nodded. "It's the alicorn amulet. So, that's what we're actually after. I'll have to deal with Trollestia from deceiving me later on when we all get back home." That's when they all heard hoof steps coming from beyond the door that Celestia and Luna had entered from. In less than a second, Luna turned herself and Celestia invisible, leaving Spike to deal with his master while they watched with great attention aimed towards this world's true leader.

Empress Celestia came in wearing a full torso suit of gold armor, and extended her wings while wearing the kindest of smiles. However, this did not make Spike relax one bit. If anything, he appeared to be more shaken by her greeting him. "Hello there, Spike. How might you be today?"

He just bawled up his fists, and clenched them to his sides, and tried not to break under pressure. "Uhh... just fine! Thanks for... asking... H-how're you doing, your Highness?"

This world's Celestia appeared angered by this, and it showed in her tone of voice. "I'd be doing better... if you'd learn how to call me by my actual title! It's not your Highness. It's your Majesty! Get it right. I'm greater than a regular alicorn! Or, have you forgotten why that is?"

Spike scratched the back of his head, and said, "Because... you defeated Nightmare Moon, and saved the world from disaster."

Celestia walked by her pet, and said, "That's right, my dragon... You're lucky I found it entertaining to have something such you be my slave. Tell me, Spike, do you know how I did it?"

Spike shook his head, and said, "You never tell me whenever I ask. That's why I've stopped asking."

Celestia nodded, and replied sweetly, "I appreciate that, which is why I'll entrust you with that information now. You see, another universe version of myself came to me while I wandered the far off wastes. I was in need of help at the time, and when I saw her, it was astounding. Her coat was a brilliant color that I rarely see these days. It was pink! She gave me a present, and told me that I was destined to stop Luna."

"What was the present?" Spike pressed onwards.

"It was this!"

Empress Celestia yanked the alicorn amulet from behind her suit of armor that hid it from everypony's sight, and dangled the thing from its neckless. Spike gasped, and asked, "What's that?"

"The alicorn amulet, stupid! I've been wearing it for years now, and it's made me the strongest mare in existence. I've even conquered that sandstorm that everypony made a big deal about. Look at my realm!" Her smile wasn't at all sweet, and kind anymore. Instead, she now looked utterly crazy. "Slavery has returned things to normal, and Canterba will soon be a city that thrives again. I've saved everypony!"

The real Celestia gagged in silence. She wasn't sure which Celestia she hated more. Trollestia, or Emress Celestia? Spike then asked her, "But, your Majesty, sources of actual food has become scarce, right? In fact, rumor on the street is that the unicorn market branch has started selling fake fish! More and more corpses show up everyday in the streets, and usually, the cause of death is determined to be either starvation, or dehydration. How can you possibly think this world is doing better and better, when it's been doomed ever since those storms hit us?!"

The Empress just stood there, and bit mortified at his words. That was mostly because she knew that her slave was right. "I'd advise you to hold your tongue," Celestia said, red aura seeping from her eyelids. They stopped after a second or two, and Celestia put her amulet away. "I won't tolerate such an outburst... You know, Spike?"

"What's that?" Spike asked, instinctively raising his arms in defense.

"Your usefulness has come to an end."

In the blink of an eye, a sharp, golden knife that had been sitting behind the Empress on one of her dressers magically came lunging by her, and was headed straight for Spike's heart. Were it not for Princess Celestia's magic shielding Spike's entire being, stopping the attack, the dragon would've been killed instantly. Empress Celestia backed away, and looked around the room in confusion. Spike stayed protected, and the Princesses still remained hidden, but they wouldn't be for long. Using a lot of her might, her Majesty created a wide-spread burst of magic that overpowered Luna's invisibility spell.

They were visible once again, and both of them came forth from the shadows to stand next to the well guarded dragon. Luna spoke first. "Fiend! You have no idea what that relic is doing to you!"

The Empress rolled her eyes, and asked, "What's it doing to me? Besides that, who are you? I thought I left my sister dead for good, and you!" She pointed to herself. "How dare you impersonate me! I'll have you know, I'll murder you for this!"

Princess Celestia just rolled her eyes, unamused by the empty threats thrown at her by Empress Celestia. "I'll have you know, your Majesty... I'm more powerful than you could ever imagine. And, my sister's right. You don't know what you're dealing with, because I hadn't heard much about the alicorn amulet myself until after that storm came to pass. You see, I'm from another universe where I've stopped the storm from threatening Equestria. You, however, did not. Your world's alicorn amulet was lost in the sands of time. Empress Celestia," Princess Celestia announced. "You've been tricked."

"Tricked how?"

"Another universe version of myself delivered unto you that amulet, but what she didn't tell you is this... The longer you wear it, the more corrupt, and evil you become. You simply must stop wearing it at once!"

Empress Celestia backed away from her approaching self, and said, "I d-don't want to. I believe you, but I've done so many bad things... You don't understand why I continue to wear it even when I know that now. I'm scared that if I take it off, I won't be able to cope with my surroundings anymore."

Princess Celestia at the time figured the Empress was just being stubborn, and began reaching for the amulet while explaining, "You're an Empress. This land needs you! Although, what they don't need is a tyrant, so we need you to give us the amulet."

She grabbed hold of it, and so did its owner. Emress Celestia looked at herself with sweat forming on her forehead, and said, "Don't! If you do..."

"You'll go back to being good, and then, the world will see true harmony once more. Just... give the alicorn amulet over to me." Her Majesty reluctantly did so, and the second such a thing left her side, Empress Celestia's eyes released a quick, but strong, red aura. She then looked all around, and gulped with a heavy conscience. "There," her other self said with a warm smirk. "You'll first want to atone for allowing slavery to be legal, and then-"

"I can't do it..."

"What?" Celestia asked, puzzled by the Empress's statement.

"I can't believe... I allowed myself to kill my very own sister. Oh, Luna... She asked for forgiveness before she died, and I didn't give it to her." She then began to cry. "This is why I didn't want to take it off. I c-can't... I just can't live like this! Canterba... Equestria... It's all ruined! Wh-what's the point of living if my world will forever be in pieces?!"

Celestia slowly began placing the alicorn amulet down on the bed. "Empress Celestia, please... Calm down, because now, you can start making this world better."

The fellow alicorn just glanced away, and down at the floor below her, and said, "You know what? You're right. I think I'll start by removing myself from this picture."

What happened next could only be described as a tragedy. Luna was fortunate, because all she did was see herself already dead. To see one's self from another universe actually die, however, was ten times worse. Celestia would never feel the same way after witnessing herself take a thin string of cosmic might, and sending it straight through her very own neck. Empress Celestia had justly committed suicide, and soon, Princess Celestia would notice herself feeling rather bizarre. Her vision became blurry, and her body became numb, but not as much as her other self. Empress Celestia slowly fell to the floor. Everything for Princess Celestia, however, still hurt beyond description. Mostly, it was her mind that was sent into a new world of torture.

She screamed, and shouted in a terrible manner. "That... Can't... BE!!!"

Luna and Spike backed away from her as static overtook Celestia's body. "S-sister," Luna stuttered. "Oh, no! This must be what happened to me when I saw myself dead!"

Celestia came trotting up to her dead corpse, confused, and bantered, "Did that... just happen? No! It couldn't have! I'm right here, but then, I'm not. It did happen! I'm dead!"

She turned around, and blood began leaking freely from not only her nose, but her ears as well. Celestia questioned Luna while not really looking at either of them, "Yet, I'm not dead, am I?"

Luna gulped, and attempted to shake her sister out of the trance. "You must calm yourself. Please, sister, snap out of it."

"But... I'm dead!" Celestia cried, still jumping in and out of static every so often. She turned around long enough to allow Luna the chance to grab hold of an elephant with her magic. "How can I possibly be-"

Clank!

Luna made her strike clean and quick, knocking Celestia to the floor. Luna checked to make sure her sister was just passed out, which she was. In Celestia's dreams, she would remember asking herself over and over again, "What's going on?"

Both Luna and Spike would tend to her while she fell in and out of momentary insanity. All throughout the night, she appeared to blink in and out of existence entirely. Static surrounded her constantly, and it wouldn't leave Celestia's body until sunrise. Luna took charge of Empress Celestia's single most important task of the day. Luckily, thanks to all the teleporting they had been doing from one universe to another, Luna was able to carry out this chore rather easily. The next time Celestia would awaken, she'd have the most uncomfortable of headaches, but at the very least, the terrible experience would be over for her. However, it would have lasting side effects.