John Sampson's Story

Twilight is unhappy. We are assigned to hold Court tomorrow morning. It is bad enough that she has to interrupt her studies but she has been instructed by Celestia to let me lead and only become involved if I ask. I’m trying to explain to her that this is Celestia testing me. Can I represent the Herd or will I go to pieces under public pressure? It’s the same kind of thing that her brother had to survive. Besides, if I can get good enough to solo, she gets more time for research. That penetrates.

Then I have an idea. What about Spike? Yes, it is perfectly acceptable for Spike to be there to answer protocol questions. So if a foreign ambassador shows up by surprise I can ask Spike how to greet them etc.

Swift and Spike role play with me to give me more of a feel for common Court matters. Twilight gets to go back to whatever is consuming her in the library. When we break for dinner Spike has only to threaten to summon me to get Twilight to the table. Afterwards we groom and talk until pile time.

Feathers. Soft, warm feathers. And that small voice, “Zero four hundred, John.” Slip carefully out from under the feathers and off the pad. It’s morning. Bounce off the wall and into the bathroom. Dodge Swift coming back out and head for the kitchen. Give me caffeine! Begin life.

Swift joins us and dives into her tea but Twilight doesn’t show. I stretch and get into my cammies. Still no Twilight.

“Spike, we’re going to breakfast and PT. I will be at the Throne Room before zero eight hundred. If Twilight isn’t there, I will come get her. Be sure you tell her that.

We walk into the cafeteria to sighs of relief. John is back and the world is going to be okay. I’m feeling extravagant so I go for a chicken and cheese omelet. The cook said it would take some time and I said I didn’t care if I had some fruit to keep me alive.

There are some new faces in the room. They’re easy to spot, they’re the ones that can’t stop staring. The ‘old hooves’ are explaining it to them. When my food is ready the cook just calls my name and the newbies buzz again. This is fun to watch.

PT goes as usual other than one of the newbies that has joined us. She looks up and sees me coming with a deadpony in each hand and freaks. Swift gets her calmed down and she apologizes. We shower and change to be ready for Court and yep, they are lined up at the door with our frightened newbie in the lead. They bow and I salute.

When I get to the Throne Room a Night Guard shows me to Luna’s private office. Luna greets me with a hug.

“Art thou ready, John Sampson?”

“No, but that won’t stop me. I’m worried about Twilight. She is having some sort of block.”

“Dost thou know where she be?”

“In her tower last I looked. I left word that I would come get her at eight if she wasn’t here.”

“Oh, friend John, that be not wise when anypony can teleport. I feel her presence not in the Castle.”

“Could you detect Spike if he were in the tower?”

“I be blind to all save Alicorn, Unicorn, and Thou.”

Interesting. Turning to Swift, “Check the tower and bring Spike if you find him.”

Back to Luna, “Is there a way to find or communicate with her?”

“Not if she chooses to block.”

“Okay, then we do without. Who has the list of cases?”

It is nothing but contract renewals and proclamations. All simple and easy. After lunch we have a boundary dispute that may require some thought.

Swift comes back without Spike. Damned.

But Swift has news, “Spike will be here before Court starts and may bring Twilight. He was very upset because Twilight told him that you were abandoning them then teleported out herself. I told him what you said at AJ’s and he calmed down. He has a way to send letters to Twilight no matter where she is, so he is trying that.”

“That explains a lot. If the list doesn’t change it’s nothing but simple anyway so we’ll survive.”

Spike shows but Twilight doesn’t. So I sit in the big chair with Spike on one side and Swift on the other. I manage to read all the Proclamations without stumbling over the flowery language. Then the contracts begin.

Step right up. Time to renew the contract. Did any terms change since last renewal? No. Is X Department satisfied with the service/item? Yes. Renewed. Next. And right on down the lines until something went wobbly.

It happened at ‘Did any terms change?’. The price more than doubled for trail rations.

“What’s changed that you need more than twice the bits?”

“We had a blight in our orchards and have to ship fruit from another orchard at a much higher cost.”

“Have you tried to find a better source?”

“We haven’t found one.” Not exactly what I asked.

“Have you considered subbing the manufacturing until you can get your farm in order? It will be much cheaper to ship the product without all the rinds, peels, and cores. I can give you a little room until you recover but more than double means a new RFP.”

“I don’t know about that. I’ll have to ask my boss.” Why is he so nervous?

“The contract ends in ninety days. You have thirty days to explore your options and bring me something better. If you can’t, it’s out for bids. I feel your pain but the Crown can’t be your insurance company. Next.”

Something catches my eye in the visitors gallery. It’s Blueblood leaving.

There are a couple of more routine contracts and it’s over until thirteen hundred hours.

We head for Luna’s office and she is waiting.

“John Sampson, dost thou understand that strange contract?”

“I believe I do. I’ll bet good money that AJ recently got an incredibly good offer for apples delivered to the company with that contract renewal. Had I approved it, I would have been later revealed as having taken graft money from the supplier. The cost of raw fruit simply isn't that big a factor in the total price. Did you notice Blueblood leave the gallery when that was over?”

Spike wakes up, “I thought it was boring then you tell me we got attacked and I missed it?”

“Yes, Spike. Blueblood changed from simple assassination to character assassination. Don’t worry. It isn’t over.”

“Hast anypony objection to lunch in mine kitchen?”

That got a chorus of ‘no’s.

Thirteen hundred hours and I’m back in the big chair when the doors swing open and the next case walks in. It’s a real estate boundary dispute. A river is the boundary and it has done what rivers inevitably do, move. Now both sides claim what it moved across.

To the first party, “What does your deed show?” Swift brings it. Yep, all land to the edge of the river.

To the second party, “What does your deed show?” Swift brings it. Yep, same thing to the other edge of the river.

Got a map? Yep. And we spread it out. It shows a nice, normal river meandering across the countryside and two oxbow lakes. One lake is old and the other is what brought us here today. There is a nice house with dock and other facilities on the land now within the oxbow. It’s no longer accessible to the builder and the new owner of the land is positively ecstatic at what he considers a gift from the gods.

So, “First, let us state some absolutes. The land belongs to the owner of the rest of the land on that side of the river. Both deeds clearly state so. Everything on the land belongs to the pony that paid for it or built it, the former owner of the land.

“Does the owner of the house care to sell it and if so, for how much?”

I could buy a nice multi-story in the noble sector of Canterlot for that price. It doesn’t matter anyway. The new landowner says he doesn’t have to pay for it. It’s on his land and if it isn’t moved, it’s his.

“You are both greedy and stubborn. The house owner has ninety days to remove any and everything he wants from the land except dirt. The land owner will allow free and unrestricted access. At the end of the ninety days the house owner may sell what is left or burn it at his discretion. There will be no restrictions on methods of removal save that the land must not be damaged.

“I would have thought something sensible might have been worked out like listing it with an agent in Canterlot for rental and splitting the money but I’m not going to be back here next year to listen to you two sniveling about who made the most money. Any final statements?”

They both look dumbfounded.

“Let it be recorded and done. Anypony else?”

There isn’t. I stretch and pace for a few minutes then, “Court is ended. Let’s go home.”

We went back to Luna’s office. Still no news on Twilight.

Luna is amused, “That be a most entertaining show, John Sampson. How will thou answer if they appeal to Celestia?”

“I expect them to, or to just come back to me. They have ninety days to contemplate destroying a major asset or getting along well enough to profit nicely from it. What do you think they will do?”

Luna and Swift are laughing now.

“Spike, could you send another of those letters?”

“Sure, but I don’t know what I could say different.”

“I’m going to write it.”

I do and sign it. Spike burns it and we wait.

‘pop’ Twilight is here. I grab her and wrap her up.

“Dammit, Twilight, don’t ever do that to me again.”

“Why do you want me? You have Celestia.”

“Did you read that letter Spike sent you? And, by the way, dumping on Spike is not cool.”

“You’re Herd Stallion and she’s Herd Mare. That makes you her stallion.”

“Do you remember that ‘sold my soul’ moment? This is what was meant. I restated it yesterday morning ‘no matter what the world sees or believes, my mares are protected. That is absolute and includes Twilight’. Celestia wants me as the foundation of her great new herd. I told her she could have me for that purpose as long those I love were kept safe and with me. You were specifically named so she would understand that she doesn’t control you.”

“What about Celestia. Is she one of your mares?”

“She’s part of the herd, so, yes. When she asks, I will cover her. But that only lasts as long as she keeps my band safe. That’s the herd mare’s duty.”

“Am I part of your band?”

“I just said so, didn’t I? I named you to be sure there was no confusion.”

The wings came out again. We rubbed cheeks and shared breath for a minute.

“Twilight, this is the part of me that Celestia doesn’t have. You do. The price is sharing the other part of me. Can you live with that?”

I have some explaining to do, “Twilight, I’m sorry I made some silly assumptions. I know that Celestia owns a condo in your head. I’ve told her to her face that I’m going to evict her. Where I was stupid was assuming that it was anywhere near done. You are mine until you say different. The old conditions of keeping a distance are gone. What I need to do is communicate more. You are growing up and coming into guiding your own affairs. I can’t give you the heart, yet. But that is one of the big reasons I dance with Celestia. She is the one that could make it possible.”

Swift contributes, “Twilight, I’m just beginning to glimpse some of the things John does. I don’t understand the whole of them at all. But I’m the first pony he met and his first mare and I know that every single thing he has done has made things better for us. I trust him completely and without limit. I felt his oath to me and his oath to AJ. That’s why I could invite him to go play with an Alicorn knowing full well that she could do things for him that no Earth pony could match. It’s his fate to roam far and wide but he always comes home. And that oath when he sold his soul, that was for you. He could walk away from everything Royal and live happy with me and AJ on the farm. The deal with Celestia is for you.”

Luna was somber, “Listen to friend Swift, Twilight. There be much wisdom in what she says. Celestia hath been in pursuit of stallion John from the very beginning. Yet John chose you. There be much meaning in that.”

She has me wrapped up tight. I don’t know if I could get out without breaking something. Little sobs and tremors are running through her as she processes what she is being told.

“Twilight, darling, do you have any questions?”

She is shaking but gaining coherence. Whispering in my ear, “Why, John, why would you possibly prefer me over Celestia.”

“It’s a complicated story, Twilight. Can I tell it after we get comfortable at home?”

Luna cut in, “Tell her, John. Surely thy knows it’s no surprise to me.”

With a nod to Luna, “Twilight, Celestia is a magnificent Goddess with great strength and wisdom. She is exactly the mare I want to head my herd and keep my band safe. But she is a matron, she has already reached her peak and has nowhere left to go. Why do you think you are the Element Bearer? And Twilight, as a freshly Ascended Alicorn, barely out of foalhood, with maybe ten percent of the power you will eventually have, you are her equal. You are the future, Twilight, the mare I want my foals out of.

“And I’m not Celestia’s herd stallion because I want to add another Alicorn tail to my collection, I’m Herd Stallion because I’m the strongest trustworthy candidate and she needs the help. I’m willing to do whatever the job requires including accepting Celestia as one of my mares and siring foals out of her because it’s the way to make Equestria a safe and prosperous place for the ponies that I love. My dream is to live long enough to be your Herd Stallion some day.

“Twilight, let go of me. Luna needs us.”

Luna is just standing there with her head down and tears streaming. Twilight opens her wings and I shift her to my right arm. Moving to Luna, I lift her with my left arm and hold her to me as Twilight wraps her wings around both of us. Luna is resting her chin on my shoulder quietly crying.

Looking at Spike and Swift, “This never leaves this room. Ever!”

After a while Luna whispers in my ear, “Thank you, John. This be the reason thou must be Herd Stallion. No other in Equestria could look upon a Goddess crying and think of nothing but to comfort her. Thou may release me.”

Twilight opens her wing and I set Luna delicately on the floor. Swift quickly lends a shoulder to brace Luna.

Luna smiles weakly at Swift, “Friend Swift, truly thy induction into the Royal mystique proceeds apace.”

Swift smiles back, “Mystique be damned. When a friend needs . . .”

Luna is stronger now, “Be careful, friend Swift, thou art becoming John Sampson.”

I have a thought, “Luna, would you like some company tonight? Any or all of us?”

“John, thou art overdue for conference with Celestia about today’s Court. Twilight be in sore need of rest and Spike would best attend her. I would welcome some conversation with friend Swift whilst thou be closeted with Celestia.”

Celestia is in her favorite office, “Well, John, I was wondering if you had forgotten me.”

“I was handling a tricky eviction proceeding and lost track of time. What would you like to know?”

“Why didn’t you renew the contract for trail rations?”

“Because it is a trap by Blueblood. The numbers and explanations simply didn’t line up. If I had renewed it he would have later announced that AJ was the one getting the extra more than double bits on the contract. He will be back to complain and challenge my action and authority. It’s a win-win for him. If I accept the contract, I am guilty of graft. If I deny it, I am guilty of favoritism or prejudice. Either way, he gets to challenge me as an alien usurper.”

“He has already challenged your decision. I will hear his appeal in the morning. What details can you tell me?”

“The first thing that caught my attention was a more than doubling of the price. When I asked for an explanation, I was told that blight had hit their orchard and they had to buy fruit from an outside source. The cost of the raw fruit is a very small part of the total to make a food. They would have to pay twenty times the market price to run their costs up that much. I suggested seeking a better source for the fruit or subcontracting this season’s production to allow their farm to recover. I offered a smaller but unspecified increase to help them through their difficulty and gave them a thirty day extension to look for solutions. When they failed to even inquire about the details it confirmed to me that it was a planned trap. Blueblood left the visitors gallery just in time to meet the contractor in the hall.

“We need to know how they picked this day and who AJ has been approached by.”

Celestia suggests, “You can borrow Luna’s chariot later and go get AJ. Now let’s see if we can find out who signed him in.”

It turns out our contractor is a regular visitor. He signed up for my Court as soon as he saw it posted and declined a chance to be heard on the same day he signed up. The Guardpony that signed him in is on the witness list for tomorrow. I’m on my way to get AJ.

First I have to see Luna and arrange transportation. I’m in luck, everypony is still in Luna’s office talking.

“Hey Spike, I want you to know that I always keep my promises. You’re on the witness list for tomorrow morning’s Court. So are you, Swift. Blueblood has made a complaint about my handling of the trail ration contract. Twilight, are you up for a teleport to pick up AJ?”

Luna jumps in, “I am able.”

“What about the moon? I don’t know how long it will take to locate the record we need and I wouldn’t want you to miss that appointment. How long do we have, anyway?”

“There be around an hour to go. I can perform my duty wheresoever I may be or teleport back.”

“Let’s go.”

“Picture thy desire.”

I do and lean over to make it easy for her to reach and we are there in front of the Apple homestead.

“Hello AJ,” as I head for the door. They are all seated at the table enjoying a formerly quiet dinner. Oops. Then Luna walks in behind me. Granny shoots up behind the table.

“Be welcome at our humble table, Your Majesty.” and she bows. AJ and Big Mac are about a second behind her.

Luna replies, “I be grateful for thou fine offer but our business will not permit us to tarry.”

I step in, “AJ, have you recently taken a contract for emergency delivery at an extreme price?”

AJ looks startled, “We just shipped them out today. I wouldn’t even have sold them normally but they offered such great price for rush service.”

“AJ, that was Blueblood trying to trap me on graft charges. We hold Court on it in the morning. I need every record and detail you have and I need you for a witness in the morning.”

“Do you have the Royal train waiting?” AJ wondered.

“That’s our ‘ride’ standing behind me and we need to get back quickly so Luna can raise the moon.”

“Oh. The papers are all on my desk. I haven’t had a chance to file them.”

AJ sorts through her papers and puts several into a saddle bag. Throwing it on, “I’m ready.”

As we pass back through the kitchen, Bloom finally overcomes her awe, “Are you really going to ride a Princess all the way to Canterlot?”

I couldn’t leave that one, “Yes we are. Wanna watch?”

Bloom shoots out of her seat and after us. We step out to the middle of the front yard, stand side by side and ‘pop’ we are in Luna’s office.

“John Sampson, thou be incorrigible.”

AJ scowls at me, “You know, Granny is going to get you for that.”

Everypony else is gone but a large bowl of fruit is sitting on her desk. I tossed AJ an apple and keep one for myself as a third floats to Luna.

I suggest, “Luna, can we follow you to the balcony and come back down with Celestia when you are done?”

“Certainly. Methinks Celestia would prefer it that way.”

We reduce the fruit bowl for a while then it is time to go up to the balcony. AJ watches quietly then we thank Luna and go to plan the morning’s Court with Celestia.

“AJ, tell us what happened with this order in detail.”

“Yesterday afternoon a Unicorn walked up to the farm house and asked for me. She said she had a company that made rations for the Guard and their stock of apples had been ruined by accident. They had a deadline to meet and didn’t want to let the Guard down so she wanted to buy apples to replace the lost stock if we could ship them immediately. She offered a bonus if we could ship within twenty four hours. I said that premium shipping covered it. We finished the papers and left together for town. When I went into the shipping office to arrange for wagons in the morning, she went on and I never saw her again. When I got back to the farm this check was on my desk.”

AJ pulled a check from her bag and passed it to me. Yep, it was about the difference in the contract price. I passed it to Celestia.

I look at AJ, “That is the very same amount that they needed to add to their contract that I was supposed to approve in Court this morning. We both turned them down so we avoided that trap but now they will say one of us demanded the money and I turned them down in Court because they didn’t pay fast enough or used a check. You will have to testify and it is a safe bet that somepony will claim you asked for that amount, maybe even that you bragged I would kill their contract if they didn’t pay. They may also say that we are mistreating them because I hate blue ponies or something equally absurd.”

AJ is livid, “Do you think they are foolish enough to accuse me of lying? How absurd can they get?”

“AJ, you are my mare. They will claim that disqualifies you from testifying about me. It would if you weren’t the Element Bearer. When you say that, they will start shouting ‘Royal Privilege’. Celestia, do think it would help to bring Shining in to examine me?”

“He will be here, John. I have asked Cadance to preside to remove any trace of favoritism for my own stallion. But I fear they will try to tar the entire Royal Herd with the same brush. There are already stories circulating in town of your strange alien way of bedazzling ponies.”

“I really hope they use that one. We can call Doctor Red in to testify about my health as a stallion. That might be a good idea anyway as soon as they use the ‘alien’ word. The definition of ‘species’ for most purposes is ‘able to reproduce successfully’.”

Celestia is thoughtful, “John, do you really want to make this a Royal issue? Once that bucket of worms is spilled they will explore every single part of your life looking for something that will squick the average pony.”

“I hope they do. I have nothing to be ashamed of and we could put this scarecrow in its grave permanently.”

Celestia is still worried, “It could go on for days and drag everypony you care about in to it with you.”

“Celestia, if they insult my band or herd beyond a minor level, I will stand up and call it a stallion challenge. One way or the other, it will end there.”

AJ was seriously worried now, “Are you sure that is wise, John?”

“AJ, if he accepts it is their plan from the beginning and we might as well get it over with. If he tries to paint me as unstable I will launch into my main theme as the protector of my herd. Celestia, how would most mares feel about having great strong meat eating stallion devoted to protecting them and their foals?”

Celestia laughs, “You know how that will work. Half the tails in the room will go straight up.”

We kick ideas back and forth for a while then AJ and I head for the tower to get a good night’s rest. There was much hugging and happy greeting when we walk in the door.

But Twilight isn’t entirely happy. She takes me off for a private moment, “I’m sorry, John. I should have been there. I could have stopped them.”

“No you couldn’t. Their plan allowed for that. It’s better this way. It’s pure stallion challenge now and we’ve got that covered. And Twilight, did you fully understand what was going on with Luna?”

“I’m not sure, John.”

“Think about this. Luna and Celestia are the same age effectively. Celestia has recently, in Alicorn terms, passed her peak and begun to feel the years. Luna is feeling the same thing happening to her and some day you will feel it too. Even though the body renews itself, the rest of the universe is doing more than just maintaining, it is growing. Just as you are going to surpass Celestia, some day your foals will leave you behind. And Luna’s loss is compounded by missing her thousand best years.