Your Family and You

“You know, you’re an incredibly annoying—yet also incredibly interesting—individual.”

Glancing up from the baby goats I was trying to stuff into tutus, I saw the mare leaning on the wooden fence. I opened my mouth to call out to her, only for the kid in my hands to bleat loudly before headbutting me in the stomach. The breath left my lungs and with a grunt of pain, I collapsed onto my back.

The kid pranced off, its head held high in the air.

“Would you believe me when I say that seeing that made me feel a little better?” the mare asked with a hint of laughter in her voice.

“Ungrateful little shits,” I groaned as I pushed myself into a seated position. Resting my arms on my knees, I glared at the retreating baby goats. They grouped around their mother, who was wearing a black sequin opera dress and was in the process of screwing on her horns.

“Baaah,” the one who had butted me shot back.

I pointed a finger at it. “Use that kind of language again and I’ll replace your horns with a fucking pair of cymbals instead.”

The kid snorted but didn’t make any more noise, instead huddling under its mother’s dress.

Grumbling to myself, I got to my feet and brushed myself off before turning back to the mare. “Excuse me, but what are you doing here? The petting zoo doesn’t open for another hour or so. Customers shouldn’t be inside yet. The animals aren’t properly dressed yet, and Fluttershy will be so disappointed if they didn’t look their best for the visitors.”

The mare gave me a bemused look before her eyes narrowed. “You’re being serious, aren’t you?”

“Of course I am,” I said. “The general public is not allowed inside the zoo outside of operating hours.”

“You honestly don’t remember anything?”

“Are you calling me stupid?” I asked, placing my hands on my hips. Movement above me caught my attention, and I looked up just in time to duck right as a group of pigs flew by, flight goggles on their heads and small capes on their backs. They circled the area once before soaring off towards a pen where a bunch of chickens were forming a large pyramid of eggs while the ducks cheered them on.

“Oh, honey, you have no idea,” the mare muttered under her breath, drawing my attention back to her. Sighing heavily, she shook her head. “Look at me. Really look at me. Do I look familiar to you? At all?”

Blinking, I gave the mare a quick once-over. Her coat was a dark pink color—almost sangria—with lighter purple freckles across her cheeks, neck, and chest. A short-cropped mane of hot pink hair hung down in front of a pair of piercing blue eyes. Bat-like wings, the same color as her mane, stuck out from her shoulders.

After studying her for a few more seconds, I shook my head. “Nope. Not really.”

“Of course not,” the mare tsked. With a flap of her wings, she jumped over the fence. As she stalked towards me, I was thrown off by her strange gait. Her forelegs moved normally, but her hind end bounced with each step, almost like she was jumping. As she got closer, the reason for the weird movement became painfully clear—she was missing her entire back right leg. A massive scar covered the area where the limb should have been, running down to her teats, which were hanging exposed.

“Even though we’ve been through this multiple times already, let’s try this again,” she said as she came to a stop in front of me. Unfurling a wing, she gave me a small half-bow. “My name is Lush Night. I was instructed by Her Royal Highness, Princess Luna, to help you with your nightmares.”

“What nightmares?” I asked.

“The nightmares you’ve been having on and off for the past few weeks,” the mare answered. “You’ve been having them so frequently that your mate has contacted us. I’ve been trying to help you with them, but you don’t ever seem to remember our encounters, which makes treating the underlying issues of the nightmares even more difficult.” Her piercing eyes bored into my head.

I stared at her for a moment as I chewed on my cheek.

“Riiight,” I said eventually. “Listen, I get that you might be overly eager to get into the petting zoo, but we aren’t open yet. I’m gonna have to ask you to leave.”

It was the mare’s turn to blink. “Wat?”

“Look,” I sighed, “I don’t have time for this right now. If I don’t get these animals dressed and ready to go, Fluttershy is going to be really, really upset with me. Which means she’ll probably be passive-aggressive for about an hour before spending the next week apologizing to me for it. So, if you don’t mind, I have work to do.” Turning, I moved off towards the sheep pen.

“Now hold on one second!” In a flutter of wings, the mare hurried after me, half flying-half hopping. It wasn’t until I hopped over the fence that she finally took flight. Hovering beside me, she crossed her forelegs. “Whether you remember me or not, I know for a fact you can remember having nightmares. Your mate has confirmed that you’ve admitted to having them in the waking world.”

“Look,” I said as I reached the sheep pen. “If you have a problem with the zoo’s operating hours, you can take that up with Fluttershy. I have no control over it.” Leaning on the fence, I peered out at the ewes. Each one was wearing a pair of matching stockings and garter belts, except for the one ram who was wearing a pimp jacket.

Suddenly the mare was in my face. “I’m not here for your fucking zoo! I’m here to take care of you, whether you want it or not!”

Stumbling backward, I stared up at the mare in shock. Something tickled in the back of my mind. A feeling of déjà vu. I was forgetting something, something that seemed important, but I couldn’t recall what. Suddenly, the mare didn’t seem all that unfamiliar.

“I… know you…” I muttered.

“Finally,” the mare growled. “It’s about time we started to have a breakthrou—”

DROO-O-O-O-O-O-OOOMMMM

At that moment, a sudden explosion of sound roared into my ears. It tore into my eardrums and sent vibrations down my entire body. The force of the concussive blast was too much, and with a scream of pain, I woke up.

~ ~ ~ ~ > > < < ~ ~ ~ ~

Shooting up, I clapped my hands to my ears even as my entire body continued to vibrate. The deep, rumbling bass shook me to my core, my eyes and teeth rattling in my head. The noise tore into my brain, causing my skull to feel like it was going to split in two. I cried out, but the scream was lost beneath the deluge of sound.

Shocked, dazed, and confused, I rolled off the couch and collapsed to the floor. Around me, the others were doing the same. Avera and Ebony were both pressing their hooves to their ears, their faces screwed up in pain. Primrose looked practically catatonic, her entire body twitching and spasming. The thumbs of her wings were shoved so far into her ears, she was probably in danger of puncturing her eardrums.

Then, as soon as it had started, the sound ceased.

I remained where I had fallen, hands still clasped over my ringing ears. My head throbbed in pain, and my stomach twinged as the room spun. The horrible taste of stale alcohol filled my dry mouth.

There came a shuffling noise beside me and I cracked open an eye. Pyresteed crawled out from beneath the couch, a spooked look on her face. “A-alpha?”

“What the buck was that?” Avera groaned, slowly uncurling from her fetal position.

Before any of us could answer, a loud voice shouted. “Good morning, Ponyville! Hey, it’s another de-lightful day here in Ponyland. It’s balmy weather outside right now and the sun is shining without a cloud in the sky! Everypony, time to get up! Get up, wherever you are! That’s right, rise and shine!”

Propping myself up on the coffee table, I glared at the unicorn currently standing in the center of the library, a forehoof resting on a large bass amp. “...the fuck are you doing here?”

The unicorn smirked, tossing her two-tone blue mane out of her face. She lowered her shades, her red eyes glowing in the dim light of the library. “Good to see you again too, brony.”

“Nuuh,” Primrose moaned weakly, trying to hide behind her wings. “You can’t be in here. This is my den… my pack…”

“Nonsense!” Vinyl Scratch said loudly. “We’re all friends here, right?” Stepping off the amp, she lowered her shades again as her horn lit up with ruby-colored magic. A moment later the blinds were thrown open wide, allowing sunlight to pour into the library.

Four cries of pain accompanied the sudden increase in light.

“Oh damn, it looks like you ponies had a good time last night,” Vinyl said as she looked around. Horn glowing again, she levitated a couple of empty rum bottles into the air. “My, my, my… someone was thirsty.”

“Stop with the noise,” Ebony whined, pressing a pair of pillows over her ears.

“What?!” Vinyl asked, louder than before. “What was that?” She clinked the bottles together with almost sadistic glee.

“Please, make it stop!” Ebony whimpered.

Eyeing the new pony warily, Pyresteed slunk slowly back under the couch until only her eyes could be seen in the darkness. “Noisy pony. No like.” After a moment, she reached out and grabbed the writhing form of Primrose, pulling the bat pony under the couch as well. “Packmate safe.”

Vinyl dropped the bottles back onto the floor before moving to stand across from me at the coffee table. Raising a hoof, she lifted her shades up over her horn, revealing the black scleras of her eyes. Long fangs extended from her upper lip as she smiled. “Rise and shine, buttercup.”

“Fuck off,” I grumbled, holding my head in my hands. It still hurt, but at least the throbbing from her earlier bass attack was starting to recede.

“No can do, brony,” she said with a shake of her head. “I’m here to help. You’ve been cooped up here in this library for so long, you’ve started growing mold. I’ve seen dragons leave their caves more often than you’ve left this library over the past few weeks.”

Lifting my head, I glared at her through my fingers. “I’m good where I am.”

“Nah, you can’t fool me,” Vinyl hummed. Her nose scrunched as she screwed up her face. “You’re getting a little too stuffy in here. You smell like old books and cobwebs. Time to go outside, blow the stink off you, and stretch those legs!”

“I’m injured,” I grunted. “My leg’s still fucked. I can barely walk anywhere right now.”

Leaning forward, she peered over the edge of the coffee table at said leg. “Looks fine to me.”

“It’s stiff and fucking hurts to move.”

“Oh please,” she scoffed. “That’s just because you aren’t stretching it enough. Of course it’s stiff. I’d be stiff too if I just laid around for two weeks straight.”

“Piss off, ghost,” I growled.

She stared at me before her horn lit up. A moment later, a collar and leash hung in the air beside her. “Come on, boy!” she whistled. “Come on. Up and at ‘em. Let’s go. Come on. Let’s go for a walk. You wanna go for a walk, huh? Walk?”

“Keep that up and I’ll shove that leash so far up your ass you’ll be able to floss your teeth with it.”

“Wow, rude,” Vinyl sniffed. “No treat for you.” Holding the leash at two points, she snapped it like a belt. “Whether you like it or not, we’re going for a walk, mutt.”

“The fuck we are,” I said before pausing. “Wait, I don’t have to listen to you. Fuck off.”

“Actually, you do,” she said with a fang-filled grin. “Twilight asked me to come check up on you guys while she’s gone. See? Here’s her note.” She levitated a piece of paper over to me.

Taking it, I turned it over and glanced at the words. “It doesn’t say that. All it says is ‘talk shit, get bi—ouch! Fuck you, bitch!”

Vinyl’s cackling filled the library.