Author's Note

Bonus Points if you get what the title references.

Ponies Vs Nature: The Road to Victory

"Aren't these creatures wonderful," Fluttershy cooed as she watched the vampire fruit bats care for their offspring

"Wonderful at destroying my crop," Applejack complained. She watched with frustration as the winged fiends devoured her precious apples. "There's got to be someway to get rid of these monsters."

"I have an idea," Fluttershy said kindly. "If we just ask them nicely, I'm sure they'll just fly away." Applejack rolled her eyes as her yellow friend hovered up to one of the bats.

"Excuse me," Fluttershy said meekly to one of the bats. "Could you pretty please stop eating my friend Applejack's apples?" Fluttershy conversed with the bat for a few moments, and then flew down to meet Applejack.

"Well," Applejack drawled somewhat impatiently.

"They told me that they'll get back to me later," Fluttershy said, ignoring Applejack's growing anger. "See Applejack? Being nice solves-," the two ponies were startled by the sound of a gunshot going off, as were the fruit bats. They followed the sound to Granny Smith, who was holding a shotgun in her hooves and looked at the bats with a steely expression.

"If you varmints don't stop eating my apples, y'all will be eatin' lead!" The elderly mare yelled. She pointed her shotgun at one of the trees and fired a bullet. One of the bats was struck, and it fell to the ground dead. The other bats, shocked beyond belief, flew away in panic. "Yeah, you better fly!" Granny bellowed. Fluttershy and Applejack approached the Apple Matriarch, looking scared and happy respectively.

"Granny," Fluttershy said in tears. "How could you? What if you killed one of those baby bats?"

"I'm sure its parents would thank me for not having to pay child support," Granny snarked.

"Well Fluttershy," Applejack said with a smug grin. "Let's look at the score. Guns: One. Kindness: Zero"

"So what," Fluttershy said. "Are you gonna use them on those innocent moles too?"

"That's a great idea," Granny said. "Come on Applejack, we're going mole hunting." The two earth ponies walked toward their carrot fields, eager to kill the moles.

"But its wrong to use guns!" Fluttershy protested to the Apple family members. "Even on pests!"

"Fluttershy," the yellow mare turned around to see Zephyr Breeze approaching her with a sheepish smile. "I accidentally poured all of your bubble bath down the drain. Can you run to the store for more." Fluttershy glared at her brother coldly.

"Applejack, can I borrow your gun for five minutes," Fluttershy yelled with a very sweet expression. "There is one pest I think it could work on."