Integration

Darkness. The everlasting void. I have floated in this vast space between universes for a thousand years. I would have succumbed to madness long ago, were it not for one voice that seems to keep me going. I can’t tell if it is my own… or something else. Something otherworldly.

It comes and goes, but it is enough. It provides a sort of companionship that keeps me sane.

One thousand years. An eternity of nothingness. Time is nonexistent here. For me, there is no beginning and no end. No death, and yet, no life either.

I once was called Joseph… But that was a long time ago.

At least the voice reminds me of my name when I forget. And believe me, every hundred years or so… I forget. My old life but a faint memory – a distant echo that...

Wait. The voice is calling me.

“Joseph. It is time.”

Time? Time for what?

“Time for you to return to the waking world.”

Then… I can go back? To my old life, I mean?

“Not exactly.”

Then I will wait until I can.

“You have no choice in the matter.”

The voice paused for a moment.

“Prepare yourself, Joseph of Earth Prime.”

Suddenly, nonexistence turns to existence. Darkness becomes a vast, white space. The light blinds me for a moment, until my aetheric- No. Eyes. I have eyes now. I haven’t had eyes since… Well… Since I was human.

I blinked twice.

“Certainly is a new perspective on… heh, ‘life’. Isn’t it, Joseph?”

I idly examined my restored body, checking if all the… ahem, ‘parts’ are in place. I grabbed my fingers, tugged at my ears, and rubbed my eyes as if waking up from a long sleep. My hair floated in front of my face, its black tendrils flopping back and forth with my head. My next grope hit upon a slightly lower part, and I jumped a bit at the intense sensation.

The voice giggled.

“You humans are so bizarre. You’re given the breath of life once more and have no other reaction but to feel yourselves up.”

“I… I’m human again.”

“Just what clued you into that?”

I ignored the sarcasm and jumped to the question at the forefront of my mind.

“So, you’ve been watching me for a long time. You obviously know a lot about me. I think it’s time you returned the favor.”

“Humph. Very well.”

In front of me, a flash of light (Well, as much of a flash of light that could be discerned in a completely white space.) appeared, and out of it emerged a bizarre Chimera – if it could even be called as such.

Almost a living contradiction, it was! Its eyes were extraordinarily mismatched and oddly shaped. It had two horns upon its equine head – one of a goat, one of a deer. Its arms were equally contradictory. One belonged to a lion, and the other to a bird, I think.

Its body was more like a snake than any other animal. The wings on its back were also mismatched – one of a feathered creature, the other of a dragon.

“Discord.”

“Oh-ho! My reputation precedes me, I think! Well, perhaps I can skip the first little theatricality I had planned. A pity, really. It was a whopper.”

“But… No, this doesn’t make any sense!”

Discord scoffed.

“Pshaw, what fun is there at all in making sense?!”

“No, I mean… You. Are. Not. Real. You’re fictitious! No, I…”

“Chaos knows no walls and no limits. Wherever a sapient species rests, Chaos thrives. Human, I. AM. CHAOS.”

“Am I dead?”

“No. Well, not exactly. You’re between life and death. A sort of… Waiting Room.”

“And you… what are you, the weird front-desk secretary?”

Discord laughed again. I was tiring of his games.

“That’s – ha! That’s what I like about you, Joe. Your sense of humor.”

“That’s funny, because I had no idea I even had a sense of humor until just now.”

“Your memory will return. Just give it time. For now, though, I’m afraid I’ll need to just send you on your way.”

“Judging from your lack of snarky comment, you must be willing to listen to what I have to say. See, this is my prison. I’ve been trapped here for a long time. I want to be free. See, I’m the Spirit of Chaos. In your world, I’m known as Loki. In a world some distance away from this one, I am known only as Q. Interestingly enough, you called me Discord. That was my original name. Also interesting, the world that called me that is exactly where I am sending you. Of course, I cannot send you home, but I think you’ll like this place even more.”

“Anything’s better than this place. What do you want?”

“Let me out.”

Apparently, the conversation was over. The world faded out, and I lost consciousness.

***

A cluster of mares crowded around the collapsed form of some weird bipedal ape.

“What in Equestria is that?” a white-coated Unicorn with a purple mane asked. The crowd softly murmered.

A voice softly spoke in the midst of the crowd.

“It’s… beautiful.”

Rarity turned to the pony who just spoke and saw a turquoise unicorn with a lyre cutie mark. Her white mane was rather unstylish, but of course nopony was as stylish as Rarity.

“Lyra, darling. You know what this… thing… is?”

“It’s… I think…”

The crowd leaned in intently.

“It’s a human.”

***

I awoke in a strange room and could barely see. My eyes squinted in the light to no avail - I was just not adjusted to the brightness.

Gah... Where the hell am I?

"Oh, thank Celestia! You're awake. I have so many questions!"

After my eyes adjusted to the light, I peered down toward my legs and saw they were bound to a metal table. My arms were likewise strapped down.

I looked towards the person who had just spoke... and saw a pony. Turquoise. Lyre Cutie Mark.

You have got to be kidding me.

"Y-You."

"Yep, me! ... Wait, you know who I am?"

I rapidly held my tongue. These ponies just can't know that I know 98% of everything about them. It would be... complicated.

"You... You're a pony!"

She was unimpressed.

"Gee, really?"

Her face rapidly plastered a smile on and leaped onto my bonded body, her hooves colliding with my stomach. She (unnecessarily) pinned my arms and legs with her hooves and stared directly into my eyes.

"OW, SON OF A-"

"TELL ME YOUR SECRETS, O MAGICALLY MYSTERIOUS HUMAN BEING!"

"I'll tell you anything you want, just let me fucking breathe."

"Oh... Oh dear, I'm sorry. I just got so excited."

She crawled off of my body, her wide haunches dragging off the table. She turned away from me and spoke in a slightly less-loud tone.

"I'm Lyra Heartstrings, but you can just call me Lyra. You're in Ponyville. That's... in Equestria, mind you."

I couldn't - and didn't - mention that I knew all this already. She turned around and faced me, her (very, very blue) snout closing distance with my face. She floated a piece of paper with a long string of words written on it in English.

"There's a sort of protocol you humans need to follow upon arrival. Of course, no human has ever made it here alive, so you're the first one this protocol has ever been enacted on. You can't go back home, so you need to join our society. Granted, it will be difficult, but as it's my job as Director of Transdimensional Affairs, I'll try to make it as easy as possible."

The hell have I gotten myself into.