Class was fine my first day there. The atmosphere was pretty calm due to Twilight's quiet teaching. Her magical aura caused the small teaching staff to glide across the chalkboard, which sometimes made light squeaking noises as the stick thingy slid onto different places. I wasn't paying attention like I'd normally do in the human world, however, because something was catching my eye. A whole lot of things were catching my eye. Firstly, Smolder was sitting behind Ocellus, and, even though she was clearly staring ahead, I couldn't shake the feeling that she had to be staring at the young bug horse. If I were to bring two creatures together today, God dammit, it had to be those two.

"Gastro!"

Oh, yeah, and, that's what everyone started calling me. Changelings weren't normally known for having enormous guts, but, here I was, a one hundred pound, one-horned buggy Bambi, sitting in the sweater outfit I've been wearing for five days. Anime geeks and fanfic writers sometimes don't get a lot of credit for what they do in the outside human world, so, I couldn't expect to get that much respect here. The scientific term "Gastro" is used to describe the stomach, and, since Chrysalis apparently picked the names of her offspring out of her high school biology book, Twilight thought it a better idea if I had a more "appealing" name. Bitch.

Anyway, I wasn't paying much attention to what Bookhorse was saying, mostly because, as I said before, I was zoning out while staring at Smolder and Ocellus. The tables turned pretty fuckin' quickly when they started to stare at me. The whole class did.

"When adding Chloroform to H2O, what do you have to be careful not to get?" I rolled my eyes. Twilight stayed looking at me sternly, something my teachers would often do if I was clowning around in class one too many times.

"A missing person's case, I don't know." Twilight's eye twitched. Some of the students in the room gasped, while others just stayed in silent surprise. "Hey, isn't this the School of Friendship? Why're we learning how to kidnap someone when we could be learning how to flower frolic?" My lips curved into a smug grin. I saw a creature turn and smile at me from the second row of desks in the class, and, surprise, surprise, it was Smolder. This was going amazing right now. A chance to talk to her? Potentially convince her to think about advancing her relationship with Ocellus? Awesome! Either way, even though I wouldn't be too irked if this turned into Banned From Equestria Daily real quick, I'd rather stick to my original checklist, and that was to get those two to at least consider moving things to the next level before this day ended. After this, I'd have to move on to Gallus and Sandbar. Sorry Yonabar, but I've got bigger fish to fry.

My eyes widened now as I saw Twilight reaching the end of her rope. "Okay, Gastro. We'll see if you find anything funny once I see you in my office later."

My grin faded as I groaned loudly. The class quit staring at me, thankfully, but, Me and Smolder's eyes locked for a few seconds before we turned our attention back to the lecture. Later was gonna be hard as balls, but, at least I probably made one friend here.

I sat in Twilight's office, the Headmare(and current owner of it) staring at me with a stern look. She was obviously pissed off at me, so, I didn't really have much of a choice but to sit there and deal with her bullshitting. "So, Gastro, have you anything to say for yourself about this afternoon's incident?"

"I don't know why you expect me to care. I mean, I never wanted to learn anything here in the first place, but." I had my head in my hooves despite her constantly telling me to sit up. I'm glad she gave up eventually, I mean, what the hell did she expect? I didn't ask to be here. I mean, shit, it's kind of good I am, or else I wouldn't be able to solve the Young Six's greatest problem(and by that, I mean romantic tension...), or make some new friends that were(possibly) a figment of my own imagination. It's kind of hard to type with hooves, mind you, so, keep up with me here.

"I have you here so that you don't become a rogue changeling that feeds on love. We don't need another Pharynx running around here. Especially if Thorax probably doesn't know about you." I had enough of it at this point.

"Gee, how do ya figur'?" I said in a sarcastic country voice, sticking my two front teeth out and making buck-teeth. Twilight wasn't amused.

"This is no joking matter, Gastro, especially since there used to be multitudinous reports of rogue changelings before!"

"Alright, alright. Just let me go, please. I've got other stuff to do today."

"Fine. But you have to promise me this. You cannot go feeding off of other's love. My school is supposed to be a safe environment, and, I'm trusting you to pride yourself on that." I stood up in the middle of her sentence, aready walking over to the door. I could feel her horn lighting up and levitating a book that she hovered over her face, just so I couldn't see her expression. As I smirked, I turned my head slightly and allowed my compound eyes to do the rest of the work.

"I won't pride myself on it as much as you do," I poked, Twilight giving one last low, irked growl at me before I closed the door behind me. "Aah!" I was startled at the sight of an orange dragon figure, who was standing there with her tail swaying nonchalantly. She was leaning against the wall beside me with her arms crossed, and, the compound eyes were fucking with me at this point. Smolder let out a small chuckle, but I just huffed in annoyance. Well, I would, if I had nostrils. Instead, I just wheezed in an awkward manner, and, Smolder looked at me weird.

"You alright?"

"Eh. Things aren't going so well for me today." I began, trotting through the hallways. Smolder followed me, and we proceeded to walk and talk for a while. "I see you found me pretty humorous in class today." I smirked and arched a playful brow. Smolder retaliated by casting a smug grin at me, as if she were looking down on me somehow. I frowned.

"Yeah, I'm gonna be honest, I expected you to flip out and suck everyone dry today." We turned a corner as we kept on talking. I saw a few ponies turn away from me while we walked, and, I'm not gonna lie, I began to get pretty offended. Yeah, sure, there's an unreformed changeling walking through your school, fuck off!

"That's gay," I chuckled. She chuckled back at my jab, but, I haven't actually taken into consideration how hungry I was. That rumbling in my stomach? That wasn't just any rumbling. My stomach felt empty, void of anything, and, I started to question how the hell I was so weighty in the first place. Not gonna lie, I wasn't fat or anything. Just a little... thicc, apparently. Thicc or not, it was weird, and I didn't like it. Being so fat, and yet, so starved.

My day brightened up a bit when Smolder started to smile a little more. My stomach was still rumbling with emptiness, and yet, I felt fuller and fuller every time I opened my mouth to talk back to her. Her amusement was... filling. Yet I wasn't getting enough of it, unfortunately. My stomach rumbled a final time. Smolder stopped talking and started to stare at me with concern. Moldy peaches and sour cream.

"Are you feeling okay? You've been kind of staring in the distance while we've been talking, and, I'm thinking you're high or something--"

"No!" I answered abruptly. Smolder jumped back a little at my sudden outburst, and the other students in the hallway stopped and stared at me. "I-I mean... no. It's just- do you wanna hang out in the courtyard today?"

"Sure. Don't know why it'd take you that long to ask, though." She joked. I laughed. Today, I felt as if I could vent to Smolder about most of my problems, mostly because she was an overall cool person- dragon. We sat on a bench in the school courtyard, watching the ponies pass by(and occasionally exchange weird looks at us) while we talked. I couldn't help but notice the fact that something was wrong, though. The way something sweet and sour always filled my mouth when she talked, I couldn't concentrate.

"So, If you're feeling fat, we could always run together. I hear Ocellus takes those emergency walks whenever she feels like she's eaten too much. You're both changelings, maybe you could relate on a personal level, or something?"

I knew what it felt like.

"O-Oh, no, I don't think she'd like me all that much."

What it felt like to be starved.

"Why not? I'm sure you two'd get along fine."

I tasted the atmosphere. Charcoal and... beef? I knew I was carnivorous before, but, I didn't even know beef existed in Equestria, unless you got it from those really far off places, like Griffonstone.

"Gastro? You alright? Your stomach's been rumbling for the past ten minutes." Smolder cocked her head a little, and my eyes popped open in realization. Sure, I had been hungry, but, a hungry, unreformed changeling didn't look good on me. Didn't look good to me.

"I've just... ever since I got here, I've been--" I began to explain, but, Smolder cut me off in the middle of my sentence. I was just about to explain how I traveled here from my world, but, since--

"Wait- ever since you got where? Here?"

Fuck it.

"No. I-I... I think there's something you should know." I sat my hooves up on my lap, and Smolder crossed her arms impatiently. I sighed at this, prepared for the worst to come. "So, I'm not usually this hungry." Smolder nodded.

"Go on." The tension in the air was solid, like a gallon of expired milk that's been sitting there for a month. Sour, like... well, like expired milk. I could feel the agitated dragon beside me didn't like anticipation, clearly, so, I had to move on and spill the beans. Like the ma-- fourteen year old guy I am.

"I'm not usually a changeling, either." I avoided contact with her, turning my head quickly so I couldn't see the confused expression on her face, but, I could explicitly feel her eyes widening in even more confusion, and... fear. What was I supposed to expect from her next? She could've just up and left, told everyone to stay away from me or something, but... okay. Moving on.

"So... what are you? Unless you're saying you just transform really often, which--"

"I'm-not-from-this-world." I quickly and robotically spat out, pursing my lips straight after. I was bound to get it after this. What would Smolder think of me after this shit? I'd probably lose my first friend, and, shit would hit the fan, and--

I felt lips crash into my own. No way. No way, no way, no way. My cheeks were burning red as I felt Smolder's scorching claws clutching my cheeks- my face, the face cheeks, you gays- Her tongue began to overtake mine, wrestling it and slamming it into the walls of my cavernous mouth. I reciprocated the actions when I started to slowly intrude her own mouth with my tongue. We fought battle after battle with our forked tongues, pressing out faces together like we were trying to eat each other's snouts.

Finally, I pulled back, my breathing pattern all messed up. Smolder was panting as well, looking as if she wasn't even shaken up about what happened. I was mortified. Well, not really. That kiss was awesome, and, being a huge incel, this place was somewhere I could get used to if it wen't down like this. She smiled at me. I smiled back. Since our little "moment" was so intimate, I decided that it wouldn't be so bad for me to have a little taste of what was up there, y'know, pick my meals.

My tongue slipped out from in between my lips as I lapped up the substance in the air. It was... good. Sweet. Like love. Smolder's small smile turned into a grin. "You hungry now?" I laughed loudly, falling about on the bench we were sitting on.

"Ah, you bitch."

"Hey, just trying to make sure you ate something, dumbass."

Well, that was a really fun time. We agreed on hanging out more often, and, once, on our way back to the school, we actually made out. Score!

Update: Wait, what the fuck did I just do!?

Author's Note

Ahem, so, one tiny little detail. Where the fuck did the Smolcellus plan go!? Okay, Okay, don't worry, I can fix this. Maybe if I hook up with all of them, I can get them a little closer with each other. I think.