How The Hell?!

Now, in the next morning's class, I sat next to Ocellus, who was copying down some notes for Fluttershy's class. It was weird sitting next to her, mainly because she was a changeling, and, even though I was basically an insect now, I could. not. stand. bugs. They could all go die in a fire. Well, except for Ocellus. She was pretty cute at most, but here eyes were just painful to look at. It's like the fly I've been trying to let out of the car's window just somehow grew giant and started sitting next to me in class trying to stalk me. Fuckin' bug.

Another thing that was a little unsettling was when she'd glance at me from her peripheral vision. Weird. And it wasn't even the glancing part that unsettled me. She'd lick her lips constantly almost every time she glanced at me, and then looked back at her paper. Even if I found it weird, I mean, bug's gotta eat, right? Another weird thing, I could only tell she was glancing, because apparently, now I was an owner of those huge fuckin' bug eyes. It always took some time to adjust to the lighting of each room, and, that's what I got for always having my phone on full brightness. These eyes were a bitch. Both of them.

Oh, and, Me? I was silently taking my notes as well. Twilight's little cunt-y banter convinced me that it might've been hard out there for an unreformed changeling, well, if we're not speaking in terms of food. Fucking ponies and draining the love straight after didn't sound like too much of a bad idea. Even though it seemed like I'd make it in this world without the School of Friendship; I knew I desperately needed it. I mean, what would ponies think of an unreformed changeling, and... dammit, artist me!

I just figured it out! I began to obliviously stare down at the paper before me on my desk, sweating intensely. I designed this thing. Gastro was Nitro, me. Who even knew I was a secret bug horse? I didn't know. Well, I did, but, shut up. I made this thing. The only thing I took from the human world besides my OC form was my Dragon Ball Z shirt and hoodie. That's it. That's why I was feeling so hungry, why I was unreformed.

Okay, I'm sorry I wasn't smart enough to design a Sour Patch version of my own OC, okay? It was for the sake of this story plot, leave me alone!

I let out a large groan as I slammed my head on the desk. I wasn't looking at everyone else, but I knew; everyone was staring at me profusely. Again. "Ugh." I lamented, slamming my head on the desk for a second time. For the split second I looked up, I could see Ocellus looking at me, and, no surprise was held in her expression. Poor Ocellus. I had to have been tasting sour the whole class. Good thing was, she might've been expecting this from me or something, or else I wouldn't have tasted so fuckin' dank. -pause.-

"Gastro?" Called a shy voice from the front of the room. The atmosphere around me went sweet. As I looked around, I saw the amused faces of many ponies in the back of the class, and, some of them in the middle. Awesome.

"Sorry, YellowQuiet."

"I-It's... It's Fluttershy..." Fluttershy began to trail off and turn back around, and, damn it, it ate at my conscience like a fucking parasite. Damn it, Flutters.

"Sorry, I meant Best Pony." I chuckled and smirked. Fluttershy looked back at me and smiled, her cheeks turning the faintest bit pink. Between her and bugaboo junior, I knew I'd like them both the most.

"So, today was a massive kick in the ass." I was sitting next to Smolder under a tree, and the both of us were having a casual convo before the transition of class.

"I saw. You bronies go batshit with those 'Best Pony' things."

"Rarity?" I chuckled. Smolder's eyes widened and narrowed in thought. When I tasted the air, I could taste the subtle relief in my palette(honey and tangerines).

"Of course."

The both of us chortled over our fondness for ponies. The only thing that was missing was my phone. I could've binged DWK's "Totally Legit Recaps" with her. Oh well. I was practically gushing to her about it anyways. Smolder giggled in amusement every topic I gushed about, especially my side-fanfic writing hobby. Fun fact, I happened to have my mangas with me, so, bonus. We could both gush about OPM together and not give each other weird looks. Smolder an I were like, the best secret geek friends.

"So, you're telling me you've been stalking us for the past nine years and started writing stories about us? Dude, you sound like a serious fuckin' lunatic." She wasn't wearing a smile while she said this, but with the taste of her amusement filling my mouth, I could tell she wasn't serious.

"Ehh, whatever. Today, I actually plan on writing one about how I made out with you."

"You guys take all this shit so seriously," she huffed, shaking her head with a smile. I grinned though, and arched a brow with menacing superiority.

"Oh yeah?" I started, still grinning smugly. Smolder gave me a look as if she wanted to tear the grin straight off my face, but the smile wasn't faltered. "Technically, there're a bunch of things going on with Dragons and Changelings this year." Now, you might wonder where I was going with this, but you know what my original goal was. It was to get Smolder and Ocellus to get together by the end of the ~~day~~ week. I kind of failed the day part, so, instead of both me and Smolder being like Thorax and Ember or something, I could get her and Ocellus to be, well... Smolcellus. Smolder gave me another look as if to say Where're you going with this? I didn't want her to think things would escalate further between us, so, I had to make this quick.

"Well, maybe you and Ocellus could possibly get together," I suggested, but quickly stopped talking when Smolder's eyes widened. I might've been really passionate about this, but, I didn't exactly count on how difficult this was gonna be. Smolder raised a defensive claw while I tried to brace myself for the worst. I shut my eyes quickly, waiting silently for my body to be reduced to ashes in a matter of seconds. Instead, about ten seconds passed, and, I couldn't help but peek my eyes open. Sitting there, right in front of me, was a slightly puzzled and... intrigued Smolder. I could tell she was thinking about it. The slight taste of bitter grapefruit doused in bountiful amounts of sugar gave away the good sense of consideration.

Shutting one eye and wincing, I decided to take one last blow. After all, she was on the brink of considering it. "I-I mean... you like tea parties and cute things... m-maybe you'll like her?" I opened both my eyes again as I saw Smolder blush.

"I-I... I mean, you're... you're not wrong- Oh, shit." Smolder turned to me, frightened and blushing, as I began to wear a shit eating grin. Her eyes were nearly bulging out of her head in realization.

"E-Excuse me? You two aren't busy, are you?" A voice had spoken from behind me. Smolder looked up for a split second, and before I could say anything, her face turned red, and she soon enveloped herself in her wings. I turned around to look at the new speaker while Smolder just hid in her burning wings. I figured she'd already seen who was behind me, so, I just
went out on a limb as I smiled and stood up. To my expectations, it was the light blue bug standing behind me.

I was a little nervous when she quivered at how I was, like, four inches taller than her. I was a little tall for my age in the human world, but, I wasn't exactly that tall here. Maybe Ocellus was just really short or something. Either way, I knew she had this phobia of her love-starved past, so, I guess it'd frighten her if I ever tried anything.

My stomach rumbled.

Shit.

"Is Smolder alright? I can tell you two have been getting along," she giggled. The dragon in question was still hiding behind her wings, quivering rigorously. "D-Did you do something to her?"

"No," I looked behind me, winking at the dragon with a smug grin. As I turned back to Ocellus, however, I cleared my throat. "No. She's just got a crush on someone, and she's just realized it."

Ocellus' cheeks reddened, though I could sense that it probably wasn't what I thought it was. No, it definitely wasn't what I thought it was. I took a subtle breath through my mouth. I could taste the bitterness in the air. It was wet, moist. The type of humidity you'd breathe in after it's been raining for a good eight hours. Cold, like a crisp winter morning. It tasted fairly minty at best; yet it was so strong. It might've been a mixture of sadness and support, the type you'd give when your closest friend got offered your own dream job, and, meanwhile, you just got rejected. Heartbreak, I thought.

"That's... good." She was hesitant. I could taste it. Was the heartbreak directed toward me or Smolder, was the question. Either way, jealousy made for a pretty good story, and, I knew just how to make it happen.

Make Smolder jealous,

I tapped Ocellus on the shoulder.

Get her to admit her feelings.

Her ears perked up at my sudden touch. In case you were wondering, no, I wasn't going to kiss her. I had to save that for my encounters with Gallus. I had planned to ask her if she wanted to go anywhere and hang out today.

"Huh?" She asked me. Smolder looked at me with absolute uncertainty. I was hitting all the right places.-pause-

"I was gonna ask if you wanted to go eat out with me or something. I've been really hungry lately, and--" I bit my tongue when Ocellus slowly backed away in fear. Smolder was still watching me practically fail this for her, but I just turned my head, looked at her, and slowly nodded with a confident smile. I turned back to her, smiling reassuringly. That's when she stopped backing up for a second. I cleared my throat and nodded, seeing that she understood my point the moment she took a deep breath. "And I was wondering if you wanted to go grab some lunch. You and me."

Ocellus blushed. I'm guessing the sincerity in my voice must've doubled over the taste of my reassuring...ness. Smolder looked at me, anger radiating from her eyes and (nearly) burning holes in the back of my head. I'm quite sure they would've been if Ocellus wasn't here. For now, though, this scene had to be rated TV Y before it went straight TV MA.