Well then, ponies...

I woke up to bells, not the kind that gave a little jingle, the kind used for alarms. I shot outside to see a giant purple bear; it had a celestial body with piercing red eyes.

“Oh fuck me with a sandpaper dildo.”

I walked through town until I was right in front of the bear. It regarded me only for a second before trying to crush me under its paw, it missed. I was yawning on its head, “Surrender or face the consequences.”

It slapped its head trying to get rid of me. I sighed and snapped my fingers making the gargantuan beast shrink to the size of a puppy. The bear looked up at me for a moment before bolting. The town was deserted, not a soul in sight. I walked to Sugarcube corner and opened the door to reveal half the town, “Alright, it’s gone.”

Silence… “Well, are you going to sit here like a bunch of cowards or are you going to stand up and walk it off?”

they slowly got up and poke their heads outside. After a moment they started to cheer and run out of the store. I rolled my eyes before walking out and jumping up onto a cloud, I deserve a nap.

“We shouldn’t wake him up, fighting an Ursa Major had to take a lot of energy. I nearly passed out levitating an Ursa MINOR.”

I took a slow breath, “Not really, I barely had to snap my fingers.”

I sat up on the cloud that was now only a foot above the ground and hopped off of it, “Alright, time for lunch.”

I slowly looked around before shrugging and walking back to the inn, I needed meat. I walked back into my room and opened my bags searching through them, “Ah here it is, steak dinner for one.”

I heated the container with magic before pulling out a table and sitting down on my bed. It tasted alright, never as good as fresh but good nonetheless. The potatoes were a bit bland and the green beans were soggy but it was a good meal. I got up and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth. When I got back into my room I just looked at it, so empty, just like home. I sighed before cleaning and putting away my dishes with magic. The town was pleasant; I could take a spot in the town square and watch as they went about their lives and not run in fear from me. If I had ever set so much as a foot outside of my territory back home half the country would move away from me. I smiled and closed my eyes listening to the sounds of ponies walk and talk. I listened for hours before my necklace started vibrating, I ducked into an alley and let it’s magic take effect letting me talk to and see my brother, “Hello Draven, did the plan go well?”

he nodded, “Without a hitch, but I’ve gathered some reports that some fugitives are heading for your castle.”

“Which means?” “I need you to come back for about an hour and see what they are doing.”

“Why are they fugitives?”

“The report says that a man assaulted one of the royal guards but not why.”

I groaned, “Alright, but this isn’t cutting into my vacation time.”

He nodded, “they’ll be at the edge of your territory in ten minutes.”

I nodded before closing the connection and trudging to an open space. I raised my arms and let magic swirl around me before taking hold of it and shaping it into a portal. while inter-dimensional travel was simple in theory it took a lot of energy and I didn’t have a deep enough connection with this world to draw the obvious magic in the air. I felt the magic in my belt drain a bit before my body burst into flames and disappeared. When I opened my eyes I was in front of my castle and felt the magic get sucked into my body, it wasn’t much but it was a pleasant feeling. I turned to the road leading away from my home and saw a small group of people walking towards me, I met them halfway and saw the man fall to his knees, “Oh great and powerful lord of darkness, I beg you to allow my family passage through your lands. We have little in the ways of money but I can offer you my soul.”

That was a tempting offer; a man’s soul could keep my entire castle running for thousands of years. I looked at the large man for a moment before regarding his family. He had a beautiful wife who was nursing a baby and two children that looked to be no more than ten. “How old are your children?”

he looked genuinely scared for a moment before bowing his head, “My daughters are ten and one while my son is eleven.”

I looked at the tired and starving family for only a moment, “You may pass through my lands on one condition.”

“Anything!”

“You and your family get some food and rest before you leave. I will also provide any supplies you need to continue.”

The man dropped his jaw as he looked up. “What? I’m not about to deny you because I’m evil, I have a soft spot for kids.”

He scrambled to his feet and hugged me, “Thank you sir!”

I smiled as he let me down, “I’m not all bad, the castle is mainly for show.”

I led them through my castle taking the hidden passageways until we got to my dining room, “Now, what are you hungry for? It isn’t often I get guests so my chef should be overjoyed to use his skills.”

As they all told my shadow chef what they wanted to eat I looked out my window into the pits of despair. After I heard them finish a roar sounded overhead making me dive under the table and cover my head. The family stiffened and the man spoke so softly that I barely heard him, “What was that?” I

poked my head out from under the table, “That, would be my fiancé.”

“What woman roars?”

“A dragoness.”

I could see the color leave his features, “But, humans have a pact with the dragons.”

“Because of my brother and me, he takes the curse of the draconian and I marry the princess of the dragons. Lucky bastard.”

My eyes widened, “Take the stairway up to the third floor and hide in the second room on the right. And if I die, then god help your race.”

They all ran off leaving me to await my fate. I started shaking as I heard her wings beat the air outside and the thump that indicated her landing. Dragons are a very powerful race by nature; their infants can easily rip ten foot trees from their roots. The females have less strength but they have something that makes them so much more powerful than the males: brains. Male dragons are strictly warriors or hunters; they follow their orders even if it will kill them. Five years ago the dragons and the humans started a war, nobody remembers what started it other than a few select gnomes and they’ll sooner let the world burn than give up their secrets. The war only lasted for a year but there were heavy losses on both sides. For the humans, we lost food and land. For the dragons, they lost something much worse, their queen. My brother and I had managed to defeat her only by the skin of our teeth, but when the dragon king Yorimus saw his mate dead. Let’s just say there used to be three other continents on the planet. After what seemed like forever his daughter, princess Rulia, managed to calm her father and set up the treaty with the humans. My brother took on a curse, every day at sunset he transforms into a draconian. A draconian is a half man half dragon beast that has evolved into the fastest creature in the world. Short of teleporting nothing can surpass his speed. He gains the ability to breathe fire and see in the dark. It wouldn’t be a curse but when he does transform the natural magic in his body fights the transformation and knocks him out. He hasn’t had a good night’s sleep since. I on the other hand, was engaged to Rulia. By the customs of her people since I slew the last queen I had to marry her daughter so the balance of power would be restored. As king I wouldn’t have many duties, I would listen to my wife and follow her orders. But as a magic user I had another responsibility to my wife, to give her a child. Magic users are rare, even rarer among dragons. As such the queen is only allowed to mate with them to give the most powerful offspring. Rulia herself was a magic user giving her even more respect from the dragons. Normally a single dragon wouldn’t scare me, but she was different. Her magic could almost match my own, that was enough to scare the rest of the world and not to mention the fact that she actually loved me. A woman in love is unpredictable; she might accuse me of sleeping around one minute then bring a harem with her the next. However none of that is the reason I was scared right now, I was scared because I had jumped dimensions without telling her. When she sensed it then she would have thought I was trying to get out of marrying her. I heard my traps go off and be destroyed all at once before she burst into the room, walked over to me, kissed me, and then slapped me, “Where were you!? You had me worried sick!”

she was a beautiful beast, her magic allowed her to transform into a human with crimson eyes and hair that seemed to fit perfectly on her ivory skin. “I’m sorry, I was so eager to go on vacation that I forgot to tell you.”

She slapped me again, “First, you scared me half to death! And second, you take a vacation without inviting me!?”

she latched on to me and began sniffling, “I thought I had lost you.”

She was a head shorter than me at six feet tall and had the proportions of a preadolescent girl, maybe because she was. I stroked her hair mumbling apologies before I returned the hug, “You know, I still have the room under rent and there’s nothing saying you can’t come with me. One of your sisters could take care of things while we relaxed for a while.”

I could feel the thrumming in her throat signaling that she liked the idea, “I would like that.”

Her hair smelled of fire as she got up on her toes and put her lips on mine. She broke the kiss and sat in a chair, “So who were those people?”

I chuckled, “Oh just a family that needed help.”

“I thought you were supposed to be an evil overlord.”

“Just because I’m the bad guy doesn’t mean I’m a bad guy.”

She smiled, “How could someone so powerful be so nice?”

“I did massacre hundreds of soldiers the other day, pretty sure that was evil.”

She raised an eyebrow at me before sighing, “So you want to be seen as good, yet you slaughter so many of them?”

“What can I say; I was in a bad mood.”

She shook her head and sauntered off the room I had made for her. I walked into the room that I had told the family to go to. Before I entered I used magic to shred and burn my clothes and cover my body with cuts and burns. Show time. I slowly opened the door to the room, “Is everyone alright?”

they looked a little scared but otherwise unharmed, “Alright, you can stay here if you want but Rulia and I are going to leave. If you need anything just ask a shadow guard.”

I cleaned myself up before going into my armory and grabbing a better sword, this one would never dull and it has a shadow enchantment on it. The entire thing was darker than ebony and when I drew it shadows rolled off of it in a mist. The shadows were mainly aesthetic but they did leave the wound completely black till it rotted away. After that I met Rulia in my magic room and opened another portal, “Alright my love, let’s go on vacation.”

She smiled before jumping into the portal with me carrying her bags jumping right after. Same as before we were in a fireball but this time I knew. As we approached the town I slowed out decent so we only cracked the earth under us instead of obliterating the town. I felt liberated and let my power wash over my body as I laughed, “FREEDOM!!!”

I was charged with energy as I transported Rulia’s bags to the room and jumped into the air. I flew with Rulia making sure I burned my excess energy by shooting the occasional meteor into the air. When we finally landed in a field Rulia chuckled, “I’ve never seen you this energetic.”

I flashed her a toothy grin, “I feel powerful, almost feral.”

She traced a finger across my jaw as she smiled, “Well why don’t we take care of that?”

“Hell yes.”

She walked away and when she was a good distance away her body shook a little before in a nanosecond her body had transformed into a mighty crimson dragon. We both gave a roar of passion and instinct as we began our fight. She moved first with a stream of white hot fire erupting from her mouth which I countered with thousands of small fireballs pouring from my hands every second. When she stopped I skimmed the ground as I sent earthen spikes shooting towards her with a single swipe of her tail she destroyed my attack and set fire to the entire field with magic. The fire itself wasn’t magic so it didn’t affect me beyond making me a little warm. I jumped up above her head and gave a maniacal laugh before twisting in the air creating a cocoon around me. The cocoon turned pitch black and grew until it exploded and I emerged as a black dragon nearly twice the size of Rulia. She seemed slightly surprised but soon realized she now had the upper claw, I was fighting in a form I was not accustomed to. My wings beat fiercely as I dived towards her mouth threatening to expend copious amounts of ebony flames. When I slammed into her I was blasted back by my wings and slammed into the ground with a boom. I lost all rationality and roared no longer Jacob but a dumb creature whose only purpose was to fight. She could see it in my feral look that I was no longer thinking and backed up a single step. I blasted forward at unimaginable speeds and opened my mouth to grab onto her neck only to be restrained by magic, I couldn’t move and eventually my instincts died down and I regained my senses. My eyes regained focus as I took a deep breath with my maw not an inch away from Rulia’s throat. I felt the magic lift leaving me to move on my own. I raised my head and looked into Rulia’s defiant eyes before wrapping my neck around hers, “I’m sorry.” Her throat thrummed at my apology, “Perhaps we can find an alternate way to slate your instincts?”

“Hell yes.”

Turns out Rulia loves to be dominated, didn’t see that one coming. I carried her unconscious human body back to ponyville which had long since turned in for the night. I was drained, a good feeling after so long of waiting, and waiting, and waiting. I put her into the bed and slipped into the other side of it after stripping. The night passed and I woke up with Rulia latched onto my chest. She really was a sweet girl, brutal and fierce but sweet. Since she refused to let go so I carried her to the bathroom and turned the water on making her sink her claw like fingers into my back, “AAAAAHHHH!!!”

I laughed and began washing her body. When we got out of the shower she glared at me, “I’m still sore you know.”

I chuckled as I grabbed some new robes, “So am I, but it’s a good kind of sore. I didn’t my body would be that flexible as a dragon, I can think of a lot of fun we can have.”

She smirked as she slipped into a red dress, “I’m going to make you work for it.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

I took her hand and we walked out of the inn to wander around town until we finally settled down in the park. We sat there watching ponies run and play. “When you pick a vacation spot you make sure it’s a peaceful one.”

“I put a lot of thought into it. It feels nice to let my guard down.”

As if on cue an arrow whizzed past my head, “Fuck.”

I opened my eye to see the soldier that had his limbs replaced drawing his sword, “PREPARE TO DIE EVIL SCUM!!!”

I gave a small smile, “You want to deal with him or should I?”

Rulia just sighed, “It’s your battle.”

I nodded before standing up and meeting the warrior halfway, “You won’t be able to hit me.”

“What makes you so sure demon? These limbs that the grand Templar has blessed me with make me far superior to any other man you have fought.”

“Those arms are why you won’t be able to hit me, but if you want to do this the hard way so be it.”

The man raised his arms and brought down the sword which stopped a mere centimeter away from my head. “What?”

“The magic in your limbs belong to my brother, my twin brother. You may not have any magical knowledge but with the kind of magic he used there is a failsafe system. The limbs won’t attack their creator and because I am his brother we share most of our magical traces. The magic can’t tell the difference between me and my brother.”

His eyes grew wide as I lifted him by his neck, “How did you get here?”

he glared at me, “I’ll never tell.” I narrowed my eyes, “Oh you will, even if it isn’t by your own will.”

My arm turned black as shadows crept from inside my body into the man’s head, I saw his memories, I knew his dreams and ambitions, and I had his thoughts and feelings. The entire process took less than a second but it seemed like an eternity. “My own sister.”

I dropped the man on the ground and slumped down next to him, “That bitch.”

I sat there thinking for a moment before standing up and addressing the man, “Tell Katrina that if I must become what I am seen as then I will, and she will be first.” I let him become engulfed in fire sending him back to my sister. I sat back next to Rulia and cracked my knuckles, “We might have a war on our hands.”

“Why’s that?” she asked uninterested.

“My sister tried to have that man kill me.”

She raised an eyebrow, “You have a sister?”

“Two of them, Katrina and Zelda.”

“Any other relatives I don’t know about?”

“Just a few cousins, mainly farmers but my cousin Ziggs is an inventor.”

“What do your sisters do?”

“Well Katrina is the ruler of a small country in the middle of the ocean while Zelda is a paladin of the first order.”

She growled, “She’s a dragon slayer.”

“Yes, I believe you know her as the crimson scourge.”

Her eyes shrank, “How could you be related to that she demon!?”

I chuckled, “She was once a hero. It goes to show you, you either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become a villain. She is currently in my brother’s personal prison for mass murder.”

“Serves the egg smasher right.”

“Ha, yeah, never thought miss goody two shoes would turn psycho like that. I wonder what made her snap.”

I rubbed my chin before leaning back, “So is there anything you want to do?”

“What did you do before you came back?”

“Mainly sit and watch as they go about their lives without running away in fear. A nice change but there was something missing, I was still lonely. But then you came along.”

She rolled her eyes, “You would be so lost without me.”

“And I’d probably still be trying to cook.”

We chuckled and got I got up, “Well my princess, shall we go and partake of the delicacies we locate within this fair village?”

“You’re talking weird again.”

I smiled, “I know, but its fun sometimes.”

She sighed and took my hand; I had done as much research as possible so I walked her through town pointing out several landmarks. When we got to Sugarcube corner I felt a lot of ponies in there but the lights were out. I shrugged and opened the door, big mistake. “SURPRISE!!!!”

both Rulia and I jumped back with me drawing my blade and her slightly transforming. Her skin turned to scales and she had regained her wings and claws. The inhabitants were, to put it bluntly, shocked. “Holy crap, don’t you know not to surprise a dragon princess and the evil overlord? I damn near blew this place to kingdom Kong!” I

sheathed my katana while Rulia calmed down and we walked into the shop, “Seriously Pinkie, I almost took your head off.”

Pony booze, is strong! Like one shot of tequila is three mugs the highest quality beer. Oh and dear god the mead, sweeter and so much stronger. I had drunken only four steins and I was hammered. “So you said you’re an evil overlord?”

I looked at a tipsy Twilight, “Ya but I never wanted to be, I just kind of fell into it. And I’m not A evil overlord, I’m THE evil overlord. Mountains shake under my stare, men wet themselves at my thought, and the very universe is my bitch!!!”

she laughed and smiled, “So you’re a powerful, whatever you are.”

“I am a Homo-erectus, otherwise known as a human! But I am so much more, I am a mage, only one man rivals my power!”

“Who’s that?”

“My twin brother, Draven is a lucky bastard!”

“Wh-why is he lucky?”

“Because he’s the good guy, then again I suppose the paperwork would be hell. And being evil isn’t all that bad.”

“Why would you want to, to be evil?”

“It’s a job, I get paid for not destroying countries, I have a nice castle but it has nobody in it other than me. And Rulia comes to visit sometimes but her royal duties keep her busy so I only see her once every few weeks.”

“Rulia, who’s that?”

I pointed to the girl downing her twelfth keg of beer and stood up before wobbling over to her, “Everypony! If I may introduce the stunningly beautiful princess of dragons, the fire-y ruby of my heart, and my fiancé, her royal highness Rulia!!!”

she bowed a couple times before returning to her keg. Man dragons can pack it away. The crowd had started singing several songs at once so all I heard was incoherent noise. After a few more hours most of the ponies had passed out and I was stumbling around yelling, “BAH! You’re all lightweights! We humans have WAY more endurance!”

I fell over, “Well hello floor! Fancy meeting you here!”

Rulia helped me up fairly drunk herself, “Come on, we, we need to like, get to the, place.”

I snapped my fingers transporting us to the inn, “This place?”

she nodded, well not so much nodded but jerked her head. I could tell she was in the mood from her scent so I started kissing her neck and worked my way to her mouth letting instinct take over. That night Nopony couldn’t sleep from all the roaring.