Letters to mom

Rainbow Marigold Dash,

What kind of name is Alex Roberts? It sounds like a silly made up name. I mean what does it mean? I’m starting to wonder if you’re making this all up to hide a filly friend, not that you ever did before. How many times have I told you not to make up stories? If you’re dating a nice mare or even that griffin filly, we’re okay with that. But please don’t tell me you’ve fallen in with some bipedal dog thing. They have no table manners, they smell bad, and they have bad hygiene.

If you try to settle down with that, you’ll be a an outcast, Dashie-poo. It doesn’t matter if you saved the world three times. No one will accept a pony and diamond dog relationship. Anyway, I don’t want to hear another rant from your father about your deviant lifestyle. Not that I think like that, but many ponies aren't as open minded as me.

And Really? More aluminium than all three Princesses combined? I find that the hardest to believe. So, what’s the truth? Is he a clover dealer? Illegal salt? Bank robber?

Signed,

Your Worried Mother