Life can throw curveballs at you. The world found that out with a global pandemic. Tensions of job insecurity with mass evictions showed how fast those curveballs can be. The realization that our world can crumble apart by an organism so small that we cannot see it with the naked eye made us recognize how fragile we truly are.

Going through a pandemic is life changing, but being sent to another world because of an accident is much more of a change. I was passing time binge watching My Little Pony when it happened. One moment I’m eating super dope nachos then a hole opened in my floor that made me spill the nachos on myself.

I’m not certain how to properly greet royalty, but screaming from hot cheese on your boobs is not the way to go. I was certain however my reaction was perfect if you want to seem like a threat to guards protecting princesses. They were quick to press their swords to my throat. Fortunately the two princesses were able to get the guards away from me with magic.

How did I know they were princesses? Well it is easy to figure out when they were sitting on thrones and looked like semi anthro versions of Celestia and Luna. Everyone looked mostly human except for: horns/wings, skin and hair color, way taller than normal humans, tails, weird nails that looked like they had hooves on each nail, big eyes, and elf like ears.

Celestia looked uber pissed off, but not toward me or the guards. Luna wrapped her arms around her legs as she curled into shame. I’ve read enough isekai to figure out what happened. Luna must have been responsible for bringing me here.

“I told you we could have a hero too.” Luna said still curled in a shame ball while looking at her angry sibling.

“That doesn’t matter Luna since this hero clearly has no idea what is going on. Not to mention what other countries will think when we clearly summoned a human without the guidance of a diety.” That made Luna look scared on top of being ashamed. She was almost looking like someone wanting to Sonic spin dash out of the situation.

Celestia turned to me and began to explain what had happened. " I’m so sorry human. My sister was wanting to summon a hero since other countries have been chosen to home heroes chosen by deities. She performed the spell without the ritual involved and that means you won’t be protected or guided by a deity on your quest to save the world from the demons. Fortunately you should still have powers from the magic of our world. Also sorry for spilling your food on you. I promise to replace your clothes and heal any damage done.”

“Thanks for that... Ummm... So not to seem rude but can you just send me back instead. I have clothes at home.” I was preparing myself for the bad news I assumed was about to be told to me.

" I’m sorry but that is not possible until the Demon Lord is killed. We will make sure you live comfortably until the heroes do kill the Demon Lord. After all you were put here against your will and will not have the guidance to use your powers. Oh where are my manners. My name is Princess Celestia and this is my sister and fellow Princess Luna. Please don’t say your name since it can be used against you by the demons if they find out. Instead please think of an alias. You don’t need one right away, but please get one as soon as possible since calling you hero in public might give ponies the wrong idea.”

" It is a good thing I didn’t have much going for me in my world. So if I’m not supposed to be a hero that what am I supposed to do here?” Seriously though what the Hell am I supposed to do.

“That depends on you. We will give you bits each month to compensate you and allow you to live a decent life here. If that is not enough you can use your powers to make money if it is possible.

Now then let me see what your class.... This is a first, but very fortunate for you. It appears you have a merchant class. According to my spell you have the ability to buy anything from this world and your world. Whatever you buy goes to your inventory which keeps items the same condition while inside. You also have various business and crafting skills along with an unlimited distance Gate spell.

With Gate you can travel anywhere so long as you have been there. This would be wonderful to use to see my student, but I need to let her be. She can’t learn about friendship if I’m constantly distracting her. "

Celestia then proceeded to talk about Twilight and Ponyville. I already knew about everything she talked about, but I don’t want her to know that I know. Knowing someone who knows things about you that you haven’t told them is very creepy.

“I could just visit her and help schedule meeting days. You could use her studies as an excuse " I couldn’t keep up with the white blur that glomped me.

“Oh really that would be wonderful!” Luna looked shocked at what her sister just did.

" Sister, thou must keep thyself in proper form lest this commoner think above her station.” Wow Luna sounds like a bitch. I’m a human there is nothing ordinary about me.

“That is an easy fix Luna. Human you are now the Duchess of Ponyville.” Did she just make me only one step below Princess in the heirarchy? This is bound to cause issues.

" As much as I appreciate the offer, I can’t accept. A human with no background suddenly gaining a royal status will likely cause suspicion that could lead to others finding out what Princess Luna has done.

I recommend that I have the status a new citizen traveling merchant that happens to have won over your friendship. It can be true if we give it a try.”

Celestia gave a wide grin and turned to her sister, " On second thought Luna this might actually be a good idea.

Author's Note

A short chapter to get the story going. This is a groundup remake of “so what if I can't attack as the hero". The OP gamer protagonist is very hard to write. So instead I'm going for cunning business woman who has super convenient powers. This story will fit more with previous writings I've done so I will likely have an easier time writing than last story. For those that want a little spoiler for next chapter here it is. Equestria doesn't have coffee or pizza

If you have a better idea for description of this story let me know. I didn't touch on mainstory last time and have a hard time finding key points to put in description.

Story is based on Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi and the musical version of Hunchback of Notre Dame