Sci-Twi’s Time Travel Adventure

“I don’t understand, how can 2021 be any worse than 2020?! Aren’t things getting better?! Joe Biden is President and vaccine coming. That good thing to me.” Twilight questioned and said.

“You dumb CUNT!!!!!!!! BIDEN IS THE SAME AS TRUMP, HOW FUCKING STUPID DO YOU HAVE TO BE TO THINK THAT POLITICS MAKE ANY FUCKING DIFFERENCE AT ALL?!!?!!?!!!!?!!!! YOU DUMB CUNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Future Twi said and then grabbed a hammer and bashed Twilight’s fucking face in. When she did, the injury also appeared on her own face, because she was her from the future.

“But anyway, what really is what matters is that that vaccine causes spontaneous combustion and after everyone who’s taken it explodes, their bodies release a toxic gas that destroys all life on Earth. I was the only one who survived, because I’m the smartest and I knew that I could get an extra five seconds of life every time I licked the pussy fluids of someone who was suffocating to death of COVID vaccine explosion gas. I used this extra time to use my time machine to go back one year in the past to the year 2020.” she explained.

Past Twi was all like “WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—“ and her jaw dropped and she stayed that way for five hours straight. “TIME MACHINE?!!?!!!??!??!!?!” she yell-asked. “Where the FUCK did I get a time machine?!!?!!?!!?!!!??!!”

“I gave it to myself in the year 2020. And then used it to come back to that very year. How I made it, I do not know. All I know is that you need to go the fuck back in time to create the time machine in the first place or else the entire universe will fucking collapse in on itself from a time paradox, you dumb cunt!!!!!!!!!!” Future Twi abusively yelled at her past-self.

Twilight looked at the time machine. It was an IBM 5100 converted to be able to travel trough time. “Of course!” she yelled. “It all makes sense, only the IBM 5100 has the computing power to take you back in time to the past!!! The computing abilities for it to be able to count so many numbers at a speed so fast that nobody can explain it has stumped computer scientists for all the time since it was created!!! Now I get it!!!!! I need to go back in time to when it was first put on the market and steal my very own copy of it to turn into the time machine!!!”

“But what year is it from?! I forget because of the brain cancer that the year 2021 gave me.” Future Twilight asked.

“A year from before COVID, Trump, Obama, the Iraq War, 9/11, Regan, Super Mario Bros., you, me or even Star Wars, the ancient past of 1975.” Twilight said.

She typed the coordinates into the machine and got ready to go back to 1975.

“Oh wait, there’s one more thing you should know! I’m wearing time travel-proof clothes, but 99% of clothing, including what you’re wearing will disappear through time travel, just like in The Terminator.” Future Twi told her past self.

“I don’t give a shit.” Twilight said.