The Pony Protection Agency

{Pinkie Pie}

I smiled as I carried my research subject over my shoulder and down the hallway to the basement in my apartment complex. My research subject that I had grabbed was a young teenage boy by the name of Luke Red. He was white, had red hair, and freckles on his face. He seemed pretty cute to me, mostly because of his bright blue eyes. I didn't see his eyes until I got his attention and he turned around to see me. He was wearing a blue jacket with a white t-shirt, blue jeans, and blue sneakers.

I was able to grab Luke by making casual conversation, just by asking if his favorite color was blue and the answer turned out to be yes. I told him that I had a collection of blue items that he might want to look at and all he had to do was follow me to my apartment. Humans are so dumb. Once we got into my apartment complex by way of the back door it was too late.

The back door of the apartment complex is right where there are no security cameras. It's what humans like to call a blind spot in the building. Luke fought me when I went to tie him up. But I managed to gag him first and tie up his hands and legs to the point where he had no choice but to hang over my shoulder like a rag doll as I carried him down the hallway. That way no one was the wiser. That's because Luke couldn't fight as much while I was carrying him.

There's also a bonus with the hallway I was carrying Luke down was that it's very poorly lit and no one can see no more than maybe twenty feet in front of them. From what I heard, the residents that live in my apartment complex are actually too scared to even go down the hallway because they think it's haunted. I don't blame them for thinking that way because the hallway was in disrepair too. The paint on the walls peeled like no one had painted it in over a decade. The carpet lining the hallway floor looked like it had been ripped up by a bunch of cats.

As I carried Luke down the supposedly haunted hallway, I remembered when I asked my friend Twilight how to research something. I made the mistake of going to one of Twilight's lectures on it at the School of Friendship. I didn't realize I had slept through the lecture until Twilight smacked me on the shoulder with a ruler.

I remembered her shouting, "Wake up silly! You want to learn this, don't you? So pay attention!"

It was from that day forward that I decided to go a different route on researching. To me, it was a fun route! It was just as fun as planning a party. When I explored things in Equestria I wouldn't just observe things, I wanted to see inside of things. It was mostly ponies that I wanted to see inside of.

When I told Twilight what I wanted to do she was mortified by the idea I had. I remember telling her why just sit there and observe things when you just dissect them and see for yourself what things look like on the inside?

I threw all of Twilight's cautioning to not do things the way I wanted to to the wayside and did it anyway.

Back in Equestria, I would use the song that everypony liked when I sang it called the 'Smile Song', to draw my research subjects in. Ponies loved the 'Smile Song' because it would get them to practically jump for joy as they followed me to their doom. The ponies would have a smile on their faces even though they knew they were getting ready to die. Or at least I think they knew that they were getting ready to die. I didn't care if they knew back then and I still don't. Either way, it brings me joy to know that they died with a smile on their faces.

However when it comes down to humans, they don't smile at all when I sing the 'Smile Song', as a matter of fact when I go up to them and start singing the song, they frown and tell me to get lost. So I started to try different tactics to grab my research subjects. The thing that seems to work the most is just casual conversation.

I also discovered that humans don't like to be tied up. But it can't be helped when I'm carrying them down to the basement because it makes it a lot easier to carry them so they don't hurt themselves before I get a chance to look inside of them.

I didn't really sing the 'Smile Song', because humans don't seem to like it as much. So I whistled the song instead. Hey, even I smile when I sing the song myself. I whistled the song as I carried Luke down to the basement.

I kept thinking, Man, I wish humans would find as much joy as I do when it comes down to singing this song. Oh well, good thing I found other ways to get my research subjects. If I couldn't get any, this place would be boring.

When I finally got down to the basement, I quickly took Luke and slammed him down on my research table and tied him down. My research table is actually an old picnic table that I took the seats off of. I had nailed what was left of the table in the ground so it wouldn't move so much when I had research subjects on it.

Once I tied Luke down to the table he really started to fight. I thought I might have to kill him quicker because he was fighting a lot louder now that I had him tied down. But I decided to at least try to calm Luke's nerves and at least get him to smile before he died.

"Come on Luke," I begged after singing the 'Smile Song' for at least the twelfth time, "smile for me? Please?"

I frowned because Luke shook his head and continued to fight. Really? There's just no smiling with these stupid humans!

"Fine," I said, my patience slowly growing thin, "let's try this again." Then I started to sing. "Come on everypony smile, smile, smile…"

Once again Luke didn't smile, he just continued to fight against his restraints.

"Fine then!" I snapped. "It's time for you to die now because Pinkie needs to do her research!"

I smiled as I knew what I had to do next. This part of the research was always my favorite part of the research, the killing part. I grabbed my usual killing device which was a huge fishing hook. When Luke saw the fishing hook he stopped fighting. I'm going to assume that he knew the end was coming for him and this was it. I stabbed Luke in his chest right where his heart was. He resumed his fighting and I don't know why considering he's pretty much dead at this point.

As I watched in anticipation as Luke struggled to try and get free from what I had just stabbed him with. After a while he stopped moving. That gave me the signal that he was probably dead. I checked his pulse to confirm that he was indeed dead.

Proud of myself for grabbing my research subject and successfully getting him to stop moving I said to myself. "A job well done Pinkie! It's too bad Twilight isn't here to praise me! Oh well, I guess I'll just have to praise myself!"

I patted myself on the back and my smile grew wider when I exchanged the fishing hook for a chainsaw. I know that no one would check to see where the noise was coming from because of the haunted hallway. I started up the chainsaw and got to work. Another part of the research that I really love is drinking my victims blood. I also like the smell of it too. To me, doing research is fun but only when you do it my way.

* * *

{Hugo}

I worked myself into a frenzy when I found out what the rogue pony named Pinkie Pie does for her 'research'. I felt sorry for Princess Twilight because she told Alex and Violet why she couldn't do anything to stop Pinkie.

It's okay, I thought, trying to reassure myself, Alex is a half child of mine. His powers will develop soon and he'll have no problem squashing Pinkie Pie like a bug. Right, yup, no biggie.

I leaned back on my chair, still trying to reassure myself and I almost choked on my cigar smoke after taking a puff of it because of my panic about what Pinkie Pie might do to Alex.

But at the same time I can't wait until the vision that I saw of him getting together with Princess Twilight to come true.

As I continued watching Alex, I had a vision of my Royal Advisor Jason coming to knock on my door. Jason didn't even have to knock before I used my powers to unlock the door and open it.

Jason rolled his eyes and smiled, "You saw me coming didn't you, your highness?"

I nodded. "Well duh! Please steer clear of the smoke Jason, I don't feel like putting out my cigar today."

"Yes, your highness," answered Jason, "I'll stay on this side of the room."

I nodded and took another puff of my cigar. "Sure, what news do you have for me today?"

"Well, Zane is doing pretty good for his first week on the job." Jason said. "He's made a couple of mistakes on the paperwork, mostly spelling errors. That's what I came to talk to you about. Isn't Zane supposed to be a god?"

I snorted. "Uh, yeah but that doesn't mean his IQ is going to be super high."

"I thought so," Jason groaned, "most of the grammar mistakes are very simple."

I turned my head around to look at him, "Oh, like what?"

"For example, under the column of what the dead person was connected to when alive, if the information is a pet dog, Zane spells it p-a-e and the word dog as n-o-g. Did his parents teach him how to spell growing up?"

I almost choked on my cigar smoke because I was laughing so hard that Zane would be that stupid. "I thought Zane was the smarter one out of us triplets. But he's not only stupid, he's lazy too. Which is why I don't let him sit on my favorite chair, that is the one I'm sitting on."

Jason chuckled, "Well, I don't blame you for thinking that. At least he doesn't hide behind that biker gang look any more. He looks like he's compensating for something. I can see his fakeness from a mile away."

I smiled, "It's good to know Zane's doing well for actually working now. Just give me reports on how he's doing. No offense, but try not to bother me on my days off that much, okay?"

Jason smiled and I dismissed him.

* * *

{Alex}

Before Violet, Princess Twilight, and I could go back out to track down Pinkie Pie, I got a notice from Lucky Bee that my girlfriend Mary was on the phone. I took the call knowing what Mary wanted to talk to me about. It's going to be another spend time with her on her days off argument. I'm getting sick and tired of this. I don't order her to spend time with me on my days off, what gives her the right to order me to spend time with her on her days off?

"Yes, Mary?" I asked.

I rolled my eyes as Mary proceeded to tell me what she wanted. "When are you coming home Alex? I haven't seen you in almost a week. It's my day off today and you should be here spending time with me!"

I groaned, "This crap again? What is your problem? You do this every single time I have a job. You even did this when I worked at the grocery store down the street!"

Mary snarled, "My problem is you're picking the job over me!"

"So what do you want from me? Do you want me to be a lazy slob so you can nag me about not having a job? Or do you want me to keep a roof over your head? Didn't I just take a vacation with you last week? Do you want me to stay attached to your hip every waking moment?" I said, "I don't think taking vacations with you like every other week and taking as many days off as I can so I can spend time with you is picking the job over you. Let me ask you something, do I demand that you spend my days off with me?"

There was silence on Mary's end of the conversation. I guess she was trying to figure out something to say to that. But she knew that I was right. To me, this was another example of her being selfish and controlling.

"You know something Alex?" Mary growled out. "We'll talk about this later!"

The way Mary abruptly hung up the phone told me that she knew I was right. When I went back to Violet and Princess Twilight, I guess the look on my face said it all.

"Let me guess," said Violet, "another Mary temper tantrum?"

I nodded. "Yup."

Princess Twilight tilted her head, "Who's Mary?"

"She is my girlfriend," I growled, "she always thinks I'm picking the job over her when I've done nothing but show her how important she is to me."

"I know," agreed Violet, "didn't you throw her that surprise birthday party last year?"

I nodded, "Yeah and she's still angry with me and I don't know why."

Princess Twilight gasped. "I think your girlfriend's mental! If somepony throws a surprise party for somepony, especially for a special somepony, one would think that pony would know that pony is important to them. Last year my friends threw a surprise party for me and I loved it!"

"Let's see, this is how many arguments you've had with her this year Alex?" Violet asked.

I sighed, "Twelve."

"And how many compromises have you guys made?" Violet asked.

I sighed, "Zero. I've tried everything I could think of to show her how important she is to me. But no, she has to have the last word on everything, where should I work, where should I sleep! Gee I'm surprised she hasn't tried to have the last word on when I should breathe!"

"Wow," said Princess Twilight, "if it's to the point where you have to put some distance between you and her like that, why are you still with her? She obviously doesn't care about you."

Violet giggled, "Ha! Terra agrees with me, and I've been telling you that for almost two years now!"

"You're pretty forgiving if you're still with someone like that for so long." Princess Twilight said.

Violet giggled again, "I've also told you that for a long time too Alex!"

I rolled my eyes, "Very funny Violet. Anyway, I'm done thinking about Mary for the time being."

"Well, maybe the thirteenth Mary tantrum will finally get you to break up with her?" Violet asked.

I didn't want to think about Mary because I figured I'd think about this more later.

* * *

{Detective Simon Carter}

There's been reports of bonfires being set in different forests in the middle of the night. We've found human remains in them. Since there were no witnesses around that saw it, we have no leads to go on. I couldn't help but think to myself every time this happened, Damn it! Another one? We need to keep looking if we're going to find any good leads.

This was starting to get on my nerves because of that. But at the same time I also kept telling myself to think positive. To me, that's what helped Ryker and I solve seven serial killer cases. So why wouldn't thinking positive help now?

Ryker frowned, "Well, what do you think, Carter?"

I shook my head, "I don't know Ryker. We don't have any leads to go by."

We were standing next to the remains of the latest bonfire that had been put out. I paused when I saw something shine in the sunlight in the extinguished bonfire. I brushed some of the ashes away and I saw a bracelet. The bracelet was a medical ID bracelet and the name on it was Luke Red.

"Now would you look at that!" I exclaimed. I rolled my eyes at the look on Ryker's face because I knew she was thinking negatively lately. Yeah it seems she's lost hope on solving this case already.

"What is it?" Ryker asked.

I showed her the bracelet and she raised an eyebrow, "A bracelet?"

"Well yeah Ryker!" I said. "This could be the first lead in solving this case."

Ryker rolled her eyes, "We've been working on this case for six months now. It's not like it's gone cold or anything, you get excited by the stupidest things sometimes!"

"I think you should have a little bit more positive thinking!" I scolded, "That's what helped us solve our cases so far. Why wouldn't it help us out now?"

Ryker rolled her eyes again, "Yeah, sure, whatever Carter. I guess we should go through the missing person's database around here and see what we come up with."

"Okay, let's go check it out, okay?" I said.

I smiled because Ryker gave me an annoyed look. She always hates it when I say the word 'okay' twice in the same sentence. Either way, I was going to solve this case if it's the last thing I do.

* * *

{Alex}

After Princess Twilight, Violet and I left to go after Pinkie Pie, we stopped at a hotel because it was nighttime. We weren't even close to the last location where Pinkie Pie was spotted.

Princess Twilight and Violet stayed in one room in the hotel and I stayed in another room by myself. The strangest thing happened once I got settled in for the night. I had just fallen asleep and I was snapped out of it quickly.

"Alex…" I heard a voice say. "Alex…"

I looked around to make sure that no one had broken into my room. I didn't find anyone, it made me confused. Okay… I've gone mental and if that's the case, after this assignment I'm gonna take a long vacation away from the PPA and Mary.

I heard the voice again, only this time it laughed and said in a sing-song voice, "If you're awake and you know it, clap your hands!"

Seriously? I thought. Yup, I'm taking a vacation and then after that, I'm checking myself into a mental asylum after this assignment's complete.

The voice chuckled, "No Alex, you're not going mental. I just thought it was time to say hello!"

"Okay." I said, "Hello?"

"Good. I've got your attention now," The voice said, "Allow me to introduce myself, I'm inside your exploding star crystal, my name's Star."

I looked over at my nightstand where I left my exploding star crystal and panicked when I saw it wasn't there.

"Calm down Alex," said Star, "I'm right here, I'm on a necklace around your neck."

"Huh?" I said.

"Go look in the mirror." Star said.

I went over to the mirror in my room and saw a mini exploding star crystal in a necklace around my neck. "When did you shrink?"

"Oh, a lot of us exploding star crystals change to fit the needs of the person we're assigned to. We can change forms and have all sorts of different names. My name is Star." Star answered.

"Alrighty then," I said, "you're an exploding star crystal named Star."

Star laughed, "Oh no, I'm actually an ancient spirit that was created over a million years ago. I was created by the first ancient being that ever came into existence. The first ancient being's name was Loinsoworth, or he goes by L for short. He created a group of people and called them the Star Clan. That's the family I'm in. He gifted us with abilities like being able to see the future among other things. He wanted us to use our powers to make the world a better place."

"But unfortunately, his wife disagreed with him. She used her powers to create a clan called The Destroyer Clan, the name's pretty self-explanatory. She seemed to think that a world that's a safe heaven for everyone would be boring."

I raised an eyebrow, "A world that's a safe haven for everyone would be boring?"

"Yeah I know, she was kind of a psycho," Star said. She continued, "L's wife gave the Destroyer Clan the ability to see the future. There was conflict between the two tribes. War broke out and the universe was almost destroyed by it. Before that could happen, both tribes made a peace treaty and they found a planet called Earth. The Destroyer Clan agreed to live on one side of the planet and The Star Clan agreed to live on the other side. Strangely enough, some of the children from both tribes got together and had descendants. The further the descendants got away from the original ancient beings, the less power they had."

"There were some ancient beings that considered themselves gods and were selfish and not wanting to share their powers with anyone. But there were ancient beings that also called themselves gods, but they viewed themselves as lesser gods. They wanted to share their powers and make the world a better place like L wanted to happen in the first place."

"There was one god by the name of Hugo that wanted to share his powers with as many people as possible. So every once and awhile, he would date different women and they would agree to bear his children. When a child like this is born they are called a half child. Meaning, they're half god because of Hugo being their father and half human because the mother is human."

"Sometimes it's hard to detect when a child is a half child because some half children don't have any abilities at all. A couple of them might have the ability to see the future. A lot of half children live to be about 300 years old. Not all half children do that either."

"So is it possible that I could be a half child because I can see the future?" I asked.

"I don't know about that," said Star, "that remains to be seen. I'm one of the original ancient beings that L created. We agree with Hugo and want to share our talents and abilities with as many people as possible. But instead of getting women pregnant for it, we agree to live in these exploding star crystals. Once a child that might be a half child is detected we are sent out to help that child deal with their abilities. That's my job with you now. The ability to see the future can be triggered pretty hard when another half child tells someone like you, that they can see the future."

"Oh, but I just realized before I even met you that I've been able to see the future even before I was told I was a seer." I said.

"I know that. I saw it when I connected with your powers. It was someone telling you that you were a seer that got you to acknowledge your powers. Shortly after that, Discord came and got me and gave me to you." Star explained.

"Okay, so exactly how am I supposed to use my visions?" I asked.

"Well the visions are a road map so to speak. They point you in the right direction to go for the outcome that you seek to have happen. You can either stay the course of the vision or go a different route. Once this decision is made, you can't take it back."

"How about I do this, if you want to stay the course I will glow green. If you chose to go a different route then I will dim down to pitch black. I have a feeling you'll want to stay the course when it comes down to tracking down that rogue pony named Pinkie Pie?" Star said.

I nodded, "Uh yes, wait, how did you know about that?"

"I have eyes and ears, I can see and hear," said Star, "in case you're wondering I'm a she and not a he."

"Okay." I said.

"Do you want to know what I look like?" Star asked.

"Uh, sure, okay." I said.

"Okay, close your eyes because there'll be a big flash of light when I come out. I'll only come out when it's necessary. Sorry, it's part of my contract with Hugo." Star said.

I closed my eyes and as promised there was a big flash of light. I can see why she wanted me to close my eyes because I would've been blinded by it.

"Okay," said Star, "you can open your eyes now."

I opened my eyes to see a young woman with brown hair and hazel eyes. She was dressed in white robes, and was staring at me.