The Only Mark That Matters

Radish Root crept carefully through the back alleys of Canterlot City’s warehouse district. He tossed a car floor mat over the barb wire atop a hurricane fence and slipped over it.

He made his way to the back of warehouse. Security cameras dotted its back wall. He checked his smartphone, which showed him the cameras’ feeds, and charted a course through their blindspots.

He scaled the back wall, pried open an unalarmed window, and dropped to the floor silently. He made his way through the aisles, past numerous crates and pallets of boxes. He reached a shipping container, picked its lock, and dragged open its doors.

Inside, a woman stood, grinning. She had pale purple skin, dark purple hair, and wore an expensive tactical outfit. She was pointing a taser gun at him.

“Wait! Don’t-!”

She fired it, and two wired barbs struck him in his chest. Radish fell to the floor, twitching.

He woke up to a bucket of water dumped over his head. He had been stripped to his undershirt and boxers, and was tied with his hands behind his back to a metal folding chair. He shook the excess water from his chestnut hair, then blinked his eyes clear.

The woman stood before him, impatiently tapping her foot.

“Miss Glimmer,” he said, seeing his captor.

She narrowed her eyes.

“You’ve done your homework.”

“I heard about you from a friend. Good thing, too. I’d never expect a ‘brand ambassador’ of having a background in counterintelligence.”

“Yet you still got caught.”

Radish sat back and smiled politely. Starlight Glimmer’s face turned sour.

“You… wanted to get caught!”

Starlight Glimmer looked around the warehouse in a panic. She put a finger to her earpiece.

“All hands report in.”

She waited a beat.

“Can anyone hear me?”

She looked at Radish.

“What have you done?”

“Got you alone for a talk.”

“I was warned you’d resort to charm. But you’re not as ‘devastatingly handsome’ as the message boards claim.”

“Ouch. Well then, how about I resort to reason? Do you know what I’ve been stealing? Do you know what you’ve been guarding?”

“It doesn’t matter. I agreed to no questions asked.”

“And that’s not a red flag to you? For someone who’s been in the intelligence game so long, that didn’t set off any warning bells?”

“I’m not interested in tech secrets. It’s probably just some new microchip.”

“Come on, you’re smarter than this. How did you read Worthy when he first contacted you? You must have got the sense he was up to something bigger. You think I would spend all this time stealing microchips, which would be obsolete in a month anyway? Wagoner Corp has plans, and it’s not something they talk about in investor meetings.”

She pursed her lips. He knew he was getting to her. She knew he knew he was getting to her. She turned off her earpiece, then tapped a few controls on her phone, shutting off the cameras watching them. She walked a few feet closer, warily.

“Okay, out with it. What’s the big secret?”

“Miss Glimmer… do you believe in magic?”

Starlight Glimmer threw a bound, bruised, and bloodied Radish Root down onto the polished terrazzo of the back patio of the Wagoner mansion. Worthy Wagoner was a few steps down from her, in the middle of his backswing.

“Got him,” said Glimmer.

“Just a minute,” Worthy said.

He swung, hitting a top-of-the-line golf ball deep into the acres of his backyard, where a butler would find it eventually. He turned to see Radish on his knees, in his boxers and undershirt. He choked up his grip on his nine iron and walked up to Glimmer and Radish.

“Took you long enough. Have you questioned him?”

“You said you wanted him brought to you immediately. The time it takes to do a quality interrogation isn’t exactly immediate.”

“Well, at least you can follow orders. And you,” he said, pointing his club at Radish, “you’re going to tell me where you’ve hidden every last component.”

“Components to what, Worthy? Go on, tell Miss Glimmer here what you’re building.”

Worthy held the club above his head, preparing to swing it down on Radish’s. Starlight Glimmer stepped between them.

“Looks like our business is concluded. I’ll take my pay now.”

Worthy lowered his golf club and laughed.

“Why, Starlight, you’re going to want to stay on my payroll for the next phase. It’s the only place to be.”

“Yeah? Why’s that?”

“I’ll tell you after you recover the components he’s taken.”

“Oh… these?” she asked, pulling an envelope from her back pocket.

Worthy Wagoner snatched it away and tore it open, shaking it over his open palm. Several small jewels shaped like lenses, each a different pastel color, fell into his hand.

“Yes… yes! They’re all here! Well, done, Starlight! Come! Bring him inside! You brought these back just in time.”

Starlight Glimmer pulled Radish up by the back of his shirt and led him inside. Worthy led them to his office. He laid out the lenses on his desk, then gestured to a decanter on a sideboard.

“Help yourself. You’ve earned it. We just bought the distillery.”

“No thanks. What is this about?”

“Why, it’s all about star light, Starlight. Solar power, actually. The market for it is exploding worldwide. And that’s a problem. Any yokel can stick solar panels on their roof these days. So can any school, hospital, office, casino, what have you. Soon the world will get all the energy it needs from the sun.”

“So?”

“The Wagoner Corporation’s competitors are far ahead in the solar market. The only way to compete now is to control the resource at the other end. ”

“What are you blathering about?”

“These lenses are ancient- found in a hidden place by my ancestor. And they have a special property… almost as if they were magic.”

Starlight Glimmer looked at Radish. He looked at her, plainly, as if holding back an “I told you so”.

“What property? What magic?”

“This!”

He assembled the lenses in sequence into a cylindrical stack. They clicked together, forming a device resembling a spyglass. He held it up, and suddenly Starlight’s side of the room was cast in total darkness.

“What the-!”

She clicked on a flashlight from her keychain, but it produced no light. Worthy laughed. The darkness disappeared back into the lens.

“When light shines through these, darkness shines out! These will be incorporated into a satellite orbiting the sun. I’ll be able to turn night on and off for the entire planet! If anyone wants even a particle of sunlight, they’ll have to buy it from me!”

“What!? You can’t just hold the world hostage! Every government agency in the world will be on you!”

Worthy laughed.

“My Sunday golf foursome consists of a prime minister, a president, and a prince. They’re all looking forward to this as much as I am. And if anybody tries to make a move against me, they’d be risking everlasting night.”

Starlight looked worried. Worthy walked up to her and cupped his hand under her chin.

“You can join the new regime, or sit in the dark outside of it. All my employees will receive sunlight credits alongside their salaries.”

Starlight wrestled her chin out of his grip. “Worthy, you’re right. I’d rather be in on this than outside of it.”

“Excellent. Now, take Root here out back and dispose of him. Bury him too deep for dogs to find.”

“Excuse me? I’m not an assassin. I captured him, I recovered your property, I gave you a courtesy five minutes with him- which you spent talking to me- and now I’m taking him into the cops.”

“The cops don’t need to hear what he has to say. How about I quadruple your pay?”

Starlight looked at Radish.

“I dunno. He has some really powerful friends.”

Radish smirked. Worthy frowned.

“I don’t think you know what power is, Starlight.”

“Oh, I think she does,” said a young lady’s voice emanating from multiple points around the room.

“What!? Who’s there?” Worthy Wagoner demanded.

“Piece of advice- don’t lay out your dastardly plan in a room full of smart devices that can record everything you do. Even your espresso machine is listening to you,” the voice said.

“I’ve had trouble with hackers in the past,” sneered Worthy. “You know what I did to them? I hired them. Work for me, erase what you’ve recorded, and you’ll be the richest young lady in my entire organization.”

“Oh please, I’d rather work for Fancy Pants Incorporated than you.”

“Starlight! Take out Root and bring me this hacker’s head!”

He gasped. Radish Root was standing free, next to Starlight. Radish straightened his boxers. Starlight folded her arms.

“Look, Worthy,” said Radish, “I’m not usually one to give slime second chances. But some new friends of mine believe in extending a hand in friendship to everyone. They think maybe these lenses have corrupted you somehow. Hand them over, and we’ll sit on your confession. You can put your billions toward something positive.”

Worthy slammed an intercom button on his desk.

“Guards! Get in here and waste Radish Root and Starlight Glimmer!”

Radish sighed. He stood back-to-back with Starlight, and they both assumed fighting stances. A detachment of suit-and-tie security guards filled the room and circled Radish and Starlight. They pulled out a wide variety of weapons.

“You up for this?” she asked.

“Yes. But they’re not ready for what’s coming,” he replied.

The wall behind Worthy exploded, sending debris and the scent of cake frosting across the room. Worthy staggered and looked. Six female figures clad all in black stood in the newly-blasted hole, striking proud poses.

Worthy brushed dust off his clothes. He looked at the girls with disdain.

“You’re trespassing.”

“And you’re abusing Equestrian magic,” said the center girl. “Those lenses were a failed experiment of a corrupted princess eons ago. Hand them over.”

He held up the lens array and plunged the girls into darkness. He turned to his guards.

“Finish those two and then these new ones!”

The guards advanced on Radish and Starlight. A black winged thing flew over Worthy’s hand and snatched the lens device. The dark subsided as it left his hand. He gasped, watching a large bat fly it over to one of the girls.

“Thank you, Mister Bat,” she said in a sickeningly sweet voice while tickling its chin. “Darkness can’t stop you, can it?”

“And a room full of thugs can’t stop me!” shouted one of the girls. She speedily ran a loop through the room, snatching every weapon out of the guards’ hands and the belts off their pants in a blinding blur of rainbow. She ran her bounty outside and returned, dusting off her now-empty hands. The guards all gripped their pants to keep them up.

“Or me!” called another.

She kicked Worthy’s desk, launching it at a row of guards, knocking some down and pinning some to the wall. Radish and Starlight used the moment of distraction to take down the remaining guards.

Worthy was stunned. One of the girls used the opportunity to approach him from behind, take off her glove, and take his hand.

The two stood frozen in a trance. Then, the girl broke away from him, crying out and staggering backwards.

“It was too much… he has so much cruelty in him… he’s done so many awful things… it wasn’t the lenses at all! He’s just a jerk!”

Worthy shook his head clear. He seized the girl and got his arm around her neck.

“I don’t know what you people are, but I’m leaving. No one make a move, or else.”

“Worthy,” said Radish, “let her go. It’s over.”

He ignored him.

“You! Give me the lenses, or your friend is going to have trouble breathing.”

The girl with the lenses looked to her friends. They nodded. She handed them back to him. He spoke into his smartwatch.

“Bring the car to the back!”

He dragged his hostage to a rear driveway, where a town car pulled up.

“You got what you want! Let her go!” called Starlight.

He turned the lenses on them again, producing a vast zone of darkness across the entire backyard. He kicked his hostage into the darkness and leapt into the car. The car peeled away.

It slammed into a flat glowing diamond in the middle of the driveway. More such diamonds appeared behind it and at its sides and roof, pinning it in and blocking its doors and sunroof.

“Not much of a getaway, darling,” said one of the girls. “That will hold him until the proper authorities arrive.”

“Then let’s make ourselves scarce,” said Radish. “They’re not a fan of me.”

“Not yet. One loose end,” said the freed hostage.

A van pulled into the driveway. Another black-clad girl stepped out of it.

“Okay girls, let’s dispose of some dark magic.”

The seven girls held hands, then floated into the air. Radish and Starlight stepped back. A thin beam of pure white shot out from them, passed through a diamond barrier, melted through the car’s window, and shattered the lens device in Worthy’s hand. Its pieces burned away into black ash while he howled in rage.

“Now we can go,” said the new girl.

Radish, Starlight, and the Rainbooms piled into the van. It sped off into the night.

“Are we sure the ‘proper authorities’ aren’t in Worthy’s pocket?” asked Rainbow Dash. She pulled off her balaclava, freeing her pony ears and shaking loose her long rainbow ponytail, which soon dissipated.

“Maybe,” replied Sunset Shimmer, taking her hood off. “But we’ve got more than just the recording of his dastardly plan. Here.”

She walked over to Twilight Sparkle’s mobile workstation, reaching over Spike in her lap and typing quickly.

“I just learned a ton about the shady stuff he’s got his fingers in. Everything from illegal dumping to insider trading. And I know his passwords now. Once this gets out, there will be no hiding for him.”

“Great!” said Twilight. “I could only hack so far into his network without these codes. I can’t believe you were right about the Wagoner Corporation being a front for evil, Rainbow Dash.”

“Movies are never wrong,” Dash replied.

“Yeah, but I was,” said Starlight. “I should’ve known better than to trust that Worthy. The way he looked at me just gave me the creeps.”

“Now, do be careful with that,” said Rarity, watching Applejack pull off her black tactical turtleneck. “And make sure you wash it in cold water only. Oh, it was quite a strain designing outfits for less visibility, but at least I had a good pattern to follow.”

“Here,” she said, handing Radish’s own infiltration suit back to him. “I cleaned it, pressed it, and repaired some of the seams. Rather brave of you to confront Worthy in your skivvies.”

“It had to look convincing,” said Radish, taking the clothes. “And thanks for the touch-up.”

He wiped off his makeup that Rarity had expertly applied to give him the appearance of being bruised and bloodied.

“Not at all, dear. You know, you simply must tell me about the heists this ensemble has been through! Ever been to Cairo? Or Milan?”

Principal Celestia leaned over from the front passenger seat.

“Rarity. He’s engaged, you know.”

“Ah! Wha! Huh! What are you implying?” Rarity gasped.

Spike raised his eyebrow at Radish. Radish shrugged.

“Okay, everyone,” said Vice Principal Luna, at the wheel. “We saved the world from eternal night, but it’s getting late. Where am I taking you all?”

“All our parents think we’re having a sleepover at Fluttershy’s,” said Rainbow Dash.

“And my parents think I’m at Rainbow Dash’s,” said Fluttershy.

“Oh!” said Pinkie Pie. “I know where we can spend the night! The laser tag place has all-night lock-ins on Fridays!”

“I’m up for that!” said Rainbow Dash.

“Me too!” said Applejack.

“Would you like to come, Miss Glimmer?” Twilight asked.

“Laser tag, huh? I can’t promise I’ll go easy on you,” she said with a smirk. “How about you, Radish Root? I’d love to pit my skills against yours.”

“Like the lady said, I’m engaged. And she’s waiting up for me.”

They pulled in front of the laser tag pace, and the eight girls piled out and went inside. Luna looked to her sister.

“You know, I’m going to make sure they get signed in all right. You two wait here.”

She left the van. Celestia and Radish locked eyes. Radish rubbed the back of his head with his hand.

“Look, I’m sorry your girls got all caught up in this. I shouldn’t have involved high school kids in business this dangerous.”

“No,” Celestia said, “they’re the only ones who could have possibly handled something like this. They’re specialists for these kinds of problems.”

“Celestia… thank you for reaching out to Light Fantastic. She was surprised to hear from you, and even more surprised you wanted to help me.”

Celestia undid her seatbelt and crawled into the rear of the van to join him.

“Rad, we didn’t part under the best circumstances, but I still… care about you. Even if you’re off gallivanting around the world, setting a bad example for my students. I bet half of them will want to be master thieves now.”

“Nah, not when they have you setting a good example. I bet they’ll be amazing at whatever law-abiding careers they choose.”

Celestia’s eyes drifted down to his shoulder.

“Oh… I had to lose it,” he said, showing her his shoulder, where a heart-shaped tattoo had been removed. “If I got caught, they would have seen your name.”

“So, you still care, too. Only, you show it by erasing me from your life.”

“You’re off my shoulder, but you’re never out of my mind. Letting you go was hard, but I couldn’t draw you into this war on the Wagoners.”

“Yet Light Fantastic is in on it.”

“She was already fighting it. She’s always been a fighter, in her own way. But you? You’re an educator. That’s your special talent, your destiny, ‘stia. And judging from tonight, you’ve been exactly where the world has needed you. You’ve done an incredible job with those girls.”

Celestia smiled.

“Now that Worthy is finished, what are you going to do?”

“I hadn’t thought about it.”

“Maybe you could work as a security consultant, on the right side of the law.”

“Maybe… but then I’d just end up working for folks like Worthy.”

“Or not. CHS’s security guard is retiring. I know it doesn’t sound like exciting work, but the school sees a surprising amount of action.”

“Fanny might not like us working so close together again. Seriously, did you have to spread those rumors about Radish Root being ‘devastatingly handsome’?”

Principal Celestia smirked. She leaned in, and kissed Radish’s cheek.

“I’m an educator. I’m just spreading a fact.”