**Full House, Baltimare, Equestria**
**003 Summer CC**
**Full Package**

“Come on in, honey. Everypony else is here!”

My mother, Full Flanks, opened the door for me and gave me a great big hug, “I’m covered in mail dust, ma.” I just got off from work.

“Hush. I’m allowed to hug any of my babies whenever I want no matter how dirty they are.” When we released, she asked, “Do you want to wash up before dinner?”

I don't think I'm that dirty, but I say, “Well, I suppose I could wash my face and hooves-”

“-Are you sure,” she wonders, “Because you have a bit of a... um~”

One of my sisters, Full Throttle, yells from within the house, “That ain’t sweat you’re smellin,’ dam!”

I sigh through my lips, but dam asks as she closes the door and follows me deeper into her home, “What do you mean, Thot? What about sweat?”

I answer before Throttle can, “I’ll tell you later, dam.”

But Thot is having fun teasing me, “She means-”

“-I said I’d tell her later, Thot! Sweet Celestia.”

Mom says, "Well, your sire is here today. He should be setting the table about now. You got here right on time. Let's go join everypony in the dining room?"

I say, "Yeah. Thanks, ma."

Following my dam, I can't help but notice the things she says keeps our sire coming back for more: her flanks. She pulls loaded carts from trains to markets or other businesses and back. Sometimes she takes loads from the dock.

Her shoulders, withers, and neck are also quite well-built; but few ponies look at those areas for attraction. All of those rock-hard muscles flex and flow like water under her white coat.

Mom's siblings, the Flanks, are all very physically gifted unicorns. Our sire, Bobs Agate, is a nature-pony from a little ways west. His family out there also quite physically competent. They don't travel out thisaways often, but I think they have a lot of ponies skilled with stones or other hard things like that.

Must have been quite the volatile pairing, because me and all of my siblings got a wide variety of talents. It works that way sometimes. I think his Primary herd's foals are more attuned to his family's traits. It will be a few more seasons before the whole family meets.

I really don't know if I want to go to that.

I wonder if Pear likes mares with flanks like ma's...

"Why are you staring at dam's flanks?" One of my other sisters, Full Stretch asks.

"What!" I jump a bit. "N- no, I was just thinking-"

Dam tells her as she moves around the table to her seat, smacking a few pony backs with her 'wide load' as she goes, "I take is as a compliment, my little filly. It means your dam's still got it." I take a seat next to Circle facing one of the windows.

Full Moon sleepily says, "It's also gross." She works the nightshift for the Baltimare Weather Department and must have woken early to join us.

Mom defends her stallion magnets, "It is not gross." Good one, mom.

Full Throttle, who seems to be in one of those moods today, joins the fray, because: why not, "Horseapples come from there. That makes it gross."

Dam retorts, "You also came from there."

Thot snarks, "Did you just refer to one of your fillies as a horseapple?"

Moony says, "I always wondered..." Throttle responds by poking Moon who slaps her sister's hoof away.

Stretch who is sitting in between them both gets ready to repel incoming hooves just as the two start to descend into a territorial display, Mom speaks up loud and stern, "If you two don't stop that right now, I will come over there and sit on all of you. Don't think I won't."

Immediately, they both stop as our sire walks in with a couple trays of food on his back and begins to set them to words of gratitude from everypony. "I don't think you flanks are gross, babe," he says to our dam, "In fact, I know exactly what I want for desert later." He must have heard the earlier discussion.

The last thing he sets on the table is a pile of corn on the cob right in front of dam. Thot reaches for the big piece, but sire slaps her hoof, "You know your dam gets the big cob."

In defeat, Throttle says, "Yes, sire. Sorry dam."

When sire sits down at his seat, dam says, "Okay, so I want to hear how everypony has been doing?" She looks to my eldest sister, "Circle?"

Full Circle who has been rather quiet this whole time says, "Well, I've been working on some strange cases lately. I can't talk about one, because it's still ongoing; and I haven't done much for it besides process a few papers through the magistrate's office. But one case I had a small hoof in involved some crazy stuffed animal that was convicted being incredibly naughty."

Sire asks, "I'm sorry, did you say, 'crazy stuffed animal?'" Circle nods. "How does a stuffed animal do anything let alone commit a crime?"

Circle shrugs, "I just prepared some of the documents. I wasn't there to witness any of it."

Thot asks, "What did it do?"

Circle sighs, "Really bad things. Like, Tar Tarus levels of bad."

Everypony takes a moment to absorb that when dam confesses, "I have a few stuffed animals. Should I do anything about them?"

My sire comforts her, "Your stuffing is my responsibility, babe. I'll take care of you." She blushes and the rest of us roll our eyes.

The silence of us five siblings and our parents looking like they want to suck each other from opposite ends of the table inspires me to speak, "So, Stretch" I clear my throat, "how is it over at the spa?"

"Oh thank buck," she whispers. Stretch is a spa pony. She specializes in physical therapy and massage. It's quite a busy business sector, I gather, since Baltimare is quite populated. "Well," she starts, "I started training a new pony in massage, but I am also thinking about getting some cross training myself with the farrier or the blacksmith."

Hooficures are extremely important to ponies. Our hooves take a lot of stress and even damaging one can be debilitating. Some ponies have to wear shoes for their jobs or to help rehabilitate damage on a hoof, and maintaining properly farried hooves prevents a lot of problems.

Dam admits, "You will always be able to find work with those skills, Stretch." Looking to another of my sisters, "How about you, Throttle?"

"Moony's next oldest," she says.

Dam replies, "Yes, but she's still waking up, and I called on you."

With an overdramatic sigh, "Fine~" she looks around and shrugs as we all give her our attention. "I got my mariner's license," and we all erupt in congratulations and 'atta girl's.

Sire sees something and asks, "What's wrong, Thot? Isn't that what you wanted?"

She hesitates, "Yeah, but when I get a job on a boat, I'm not going to be around you all very often. You know? I could be out to sea for seasons at a time transportatin' things."

Circle corrects her, "It's 'transporting.'"

"That's what I said, 'transportatin'.'"

Cicy just sighs, but dam encourages her daughter, "It won't be forever, Thot. You'll be busy every day. Next thing you know, you're on shore leave; and we'll all welcome you back and have a great big party."

Stretch leans onto Throttle, "And we'll nuzzle you, too," but Throttle tries to shove her off. But she doesn't try very hard.

Sire says, "Okay, Pack. Your turn. How are things down at the Equestrian Royal Mail Service?"

"Yeah," Throttle asks, "Tell us about it, Package."

I swallow, "I, uh," my sister, Circle, pats my hoof. "I have been looking into a transfer, actually."

"Transfer?" Dam asks, "Where to? What for?"

"Well," I start slowly, "there are undermared rural offices that pay better. They also require both postmares and weather ponies to cross-train in the Reserves which is also an increase in pay and responsibility. They pay for the training, too."

Dam seems impressed if a little confused at the news. We all knew about Thot's mariners' test. Circle could always be doing any manner of things with legal issues at the Magistrate's office. Stretch cross-training doesn't alter her life all that much. But me? 'This could upset the applecart,' as they say.

Circle, Throttle, Moon, and Stretch all know.

Yet Throttle presses the questioning while sire and dam absorb the information, "So, where are you transferring to?"

I look at Thot but answer to dam, "A small town in the midwest near Canterlot has some vacancies."

Sire perks up at that, "Near Canterlot? I have some family out thataways. What's the town?"

I clear my throat, "Uh, P- Ponyville."

"Oh, yeah~ I know it," he says, "It's a pretty nice place. You know, 'cept for the Everfree... but my family are from a town a little ways west of there."

Circle asks, "I don't think we've ever met them."

Sire rubs the back of his head, "Yeah~ they don't leave home or town very often."

I admit, "I wouldn't mind meeting them."

He replies without looking directly at any of us, "I'm... sure that they would love to meet you, too."

Dam asks, "Where would you live?"

I answer, "The Postal Service would set me up with a bunk in the Reserve Barracks until I can get a place of my own. It's mostly a herd town, so there aren't many single dwellings. I'm told the Reserve Barracks are basically an empty house, because everypony in the Reserves there already has a home. It's basically vacant."

As smug as she can, Throttle asks, "So, why did you choose Ponyville? Sis?"

I start sputtering some kind of response, but before Throttle can take the reigns and tell Dam, Moony beats her to it, "She met a mare."

Sire and dam blink for a moment, but she recovers first, "W- well, tell us about her."

"She's," I begin and my nervousness seems to start melting away, "She's a nature-pony, very fit. She was bagged up when I met her, so she has a foal. Box Stuffer, my friend from work, delivered to her family farm where her sire lives; and her stallion lives at the family farm next door... I haven't met him, but Stuffer said he is quite the strapping fellow..." I kind of trail off a bit towards the end.

Sire gets up and leaves the room, and dam just looks at me.

Circle puts her hoof over my withers to show she's supporting and comforting me. Everypony is being so quiet.

Finally, dam speaks, "I think I get it." Looking at me with renewed intensity, "You're taking a risk." I nod.

It's true. I don't really know her all that well. Our interaction was so very short, but I can't get her out of my mind. It's like every instinct I have wants me to go lay claim to that mare and her stallion. If I fail in this, I'll still have a pretty good job, but it will be a hollow victory.

She asks, "Do you love her?" I hesitate, but I nod again; and dam announces to me with a smile, "I'm proud of you," and then to everypony, "all of you, I'm proud of all of you." And sire comes into the room with a cake and some lit candles.

He says, "I know it's nopony's birthday, but I thought, 'cakes need candles.'" He and dam slice up the cake into six pieces. They give out a kiss on foreheads or cheeks and a hug with each slice.

Circle states, "There are seven of us."

Sire answers, "Don't you worry yourself, my filly," and he growls, "Your dam has my desert." We all know what this means, and take our plates off the table just in time for dam and sire to jump onto it and into each others arms. Nopony cleared the table, but I'm sure it's fine. Parents just get pent up sometimes.

As me and my sisters make our way out of the dining room and away from our parents, I notice there is a pony looking in through the window. She's white and quite tall. She has glasses and a mustache and appears to be drooling.

Author's Note

Bobs Agate's full name is Bobbing Agate, is a play on words for the actor who starred in the TV show, Full House. Because of the name 'Agate,' I am giving him some lineage tied to Rockville where the Pie family lives primarily. Bobs Agate's auxiliary herd: Full Flanks (dam / mother), Full Circle (lawyer, eldest sibling), Full Throttle (recently licensed mariner), Full Stretch (spa pony), Full Moon (nightshift weathermare administrator), and Full Package (postmare, youngest sibling).

Full Flanks is is also related -a few degrees apart- to Wombo, Mondo, Thrombo, and Hondo Flanks. Hondo, as we all know, herds with Cookie Crumbles and sires the Sisters Belle.

When in short supply of stallions, a herdstallion may be required or requested to provide his hersdmares' relatives with studding privileges. These may be referred to as auxiliary herds. A secondary herd is distinct from auxiliaries in that the Secondary Herd does not have any relation (by marriage) to the Primary's herdstallion.

Stereotypical human family meals where the population is heavy on the boy side are pretty close to this depiction.