Fallout: Equestria - The Lunar Archives

(Part 2 of Ch10)

I leveled the guns, pulled the triggers, and- “AAAGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!” I screamed at the top of my nerdy unicorn lungs. A storm of lead spewed out the barrels of Lucy’s SMGs riddling the barricade and raiders alike with a few hundred new holes. Sparks flew from the barricade alongside spouts of dust and red mist. I focused as hard as I could to combat the recoil and slowly swept left. The muzzle flash was getting blinding, the rip of bullets deafening, and my hooves hot from spent casings piling around me. The barrels began to glow, and all the raiders that tried to dive out of the way were shredded like paper. The dust kicked up into a cloud but with a cone of fire this wide it didn’t matter. I kept going and going…and going until the ammo boxes ran dry. The pair of final disappointing clicks signaled the end of this bloody baptism of lead and fire. Empty~

My scream of rage piddled out into a little cough and my horn fizzled out, dropping both smoking guns atop a mound of spent casings. My ears rang and I heard voices next to me but couldn’t make out the words. So I slowly turned my head to see them. A frantic Lucy trying to scoop up her smoking guns from the casing piles, and a Moonstone grabbing me by the shoulders to shake me back into focus. The dust began to settle and my eyes fell upon the now ‘former’ barricade. The small caliber rounds may not have destroyed the larger pieces, but the barricade itself was no more than a pile of Swiss-cheesed sheet metal and broken beams. Plus or minus an ample coat of dripping viscera.

Between me and the scrap metal lay a growing pond of blood and bits flowing towards a long-defunct storm drain. Few of the ponies- No… raiders were whole. A leg here, half a torso there, somepony’s face splattered on the bumper of an autowagon. Not to mention the entrails scattered around the- “Hurk!!” My stomach lunched but I managed to catch it this time and try to choke it down. I can handle blood…Even if it’s a lot of blood… and intestines, and.. Is that a brain?

Aha! I was finally building up the iron stomach I’d been in such dire need of. At this rate, I’ll-... Who am I kidding I puked all over Lucy’s guns. Don’t judge me!

“By the founders not on ‘General’ and ‘Direction’!” Lucy flailed pulling her guns from the puke stream right as it occurred but not fast enough. I don't remember eating green.

“Hurgerfuuuluffrhh!!” The stream resumed as Moonstone's hooves got hold of my shoulders and turned me away from the scene. Out of sight, out of mind right?

“Sketchy?” His voice was calm, and soothing, like he found filly that just scraped her knees. “You okay? Can you hear me? You need a moment?”

“Mmhmm!” I nodded rapidly, biting my lip and closing my eyes tight like it would help keep the rest of my food down. My legs took wobbly steps forward away from the scene.

Moonstone followed alongside me slowly while behind me I heard hooves scooping at the piles of casings. “Over 500 bucking rounds! That was everything daddy gave me… and she puked on my guuuuns!” I heard Lucy whine like usual.

Ignoring her Moonstone's head lowered alongside my own. “I know it's not the first time killing somepony but Imma guess first time committing a uhh…” he looked back. “A rage-fueled slaughter?”

I nodded more, still taking steps and trying not to look at anything else that would upset my stomach. “MMMHMM!”

“The good news is the nausea will pass. The better news is that you got them all. Do you wanna tell me why though?” I wasn't ready to handle the big questions like that!

I swallowed hoping it would buy me enough time to speak. “They were giving you shit. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't- Hurr~” I gulped. “do something?”

“Most friends don't unleash their inner Rambo-Dash cause some assholes were giving their friend a hard time. But…” He gave me a pat that somehow conveyed the strength to open my eyes again. “Thank you.”

Who knew two simple little words could turn this full body ick into a gentle warmth that made me want to squee? Cause I didn’t know!

“Now let's get you a proper bed to pass out in. We're only a few blocks away.” he walked ahead and nodded down the street.

“An…an actual bed? With sheets? And a pillow? And no sand?” By the goddesses, it couldn’t be real! Even the tiny princesses gasped!

“Yep! Even comes with a 3rd story view if you’re into that kinda thing. I think you’ll like it there.”

“Stop trying to convince me, you had me sold at ‘bed.” I pointed out. Oh, sweet Luna’s embrace I miss the feeling of flopping face first into my bed…even the loose spring on the left side I had to keep a pillow over.

Lucy caught up jangling with a pair of boxes full of loose 9mm casings and bullet-belt links. “But..but.. What about all my ammunition she used?! I’m glad the dearie survived but she’s left me practically defenseless!”

“Ohh.. so close to showing actual concern for your fellow party member. So close.” He taunted with a faint smirk. “Don't worry about it, We’ll check a bunch of the mailboxes around the neighborhood tomorrow before we head to your enclave camp thing. Should find hundreds of small caliber rounds in about an hour easy.”

“How can you be so sure of that? These houses looked stripped for everything but nails and you think we're going to find ammunition out here after 200 years?”

“Trust me, Pre-war ponies were paranoid. Everypony was hoarding ammunition and stashing it anywhere and everywhere. Plus 9mm is super common, so don’t sweat it.”

“I don't sweat…” She huffed and followed along, having slipped back into full Lucy pout mode. “And it’s Noctilucent!”

‘Whatever you say Lucy~” he chuckled and kept walking. I may have giggled too. A weak giggle but still a giggle.

The walk was slow and in all honesty, I felt quite empty inside…for obvious reasons. The bunnies… I mean crickets were starting to chirp and darkness settled in. Amid the torrent of Lucy’s complaints about her gun was a healthy mix of concern for my well-being. She even asked if I had any lingering symptoms and went on a tangent about something called wartime stress disorder. I honestly kinda spaced and started drooling over the idea of finally getting to flop into a bed.

As expected none of the streetlights worked anymore, but enough collective light from the stars, moon, and glow of distant settlements kept things visible. The slow incline continued until this portion of the suburbs ended in a cul-de-sac surrounded by some houses in surprisingly decent condition with signs of recent repair. Were those fresh fence posts? And… semi-alive grass?! It was the least crunchy grass I’d seen to date!

This part of the suburbs was atop a large wide hill and while not the highest I could see quite far with my not-so-naked eyes. To the northeast, the hill gave way to the rapid incline of mountains leading me to believe this hill wasn’t always so smoothed over. The mountain range continued northwest and the ‘APPLEWOOD’ Sign looking over the city was a lot closer now. Spotlights shined on the massive letters from below, highlighting five banners hanging from the letters. Distance and scale implied the banners were huge, probably so everypony in the region could see them.

One white with three vertical red stripes.
A second black with two white masks one grinning, one crying, wrapped up in film.
A third green, saying ‘Club St’ above a crude black drawing of two crossed drum-magazine guns.
A fourth pink, depicting a stark white alicorn reared up high and wings splayed wide. Celestia?
And a fifth as blue as my stable suit with an equally Stable-TEC yellow pony skull with fangs and a crown.

The warlords, telling everypony Applewood is theirs. The cityscape they claimed was dotted with as many lights as the night sky above with a few larger clusters. Probably towns..or I'm just going insane…probably both!

“Here we are. 43 Peach-Tree Way.” Moonstone pointed out on the right side of the cul-de-sac. Two stories tall and the most maintained-looking one around. It looked somewhat like the depictions of white houses from the Ponyville Holyland in Dad’s book but more… modernized. Like having a small driveway where a rusted-out auto-wagon rested under a metal awning, or the power lines going out to one pole and being severed from the rest. Or the roof being shingle instead of thatch…There were plenty of potted plants though. “Now when we get up there just play along okay? No screaming, no questions, just pretend everything im about to say is true and if you suck at acting just try to stay quiet. Got it?”

“Umm… okay?” Lucy agreed sharing my mildly confused sentiment.

I had to ask. “Does somepony live here? Or is this your house?”

“Yes somepony lives here, but as far as you’re concerned two someponies live here, got it? And before you ask, yes Sketchy she is a ghoul and she kinda just lives around here minding her own business. So if you want that bed, don't scream.”

He didn't have to threaten the bed like that! Ghouls are kind, and giving, and have saved me tons of trouble in recent history, they deserve my respect! The living ones at least… that give me stuff. Still, I nodded.

“Good. Lucy?” he looked at her.

“What?... What are you looking at me for? I have manners unlike most ponies down here.” she huffed.

Moonstone facehoofed. “Just don't insult her home, She's been holding this shitshow together for over 200 years with no supplies so give her a break.”

“I make no promises, but I shall maintain the proper decorum of a guest as always.” How snooty can one pega be?!

“Great, She had a son before the war and as far as you two are concerned we all go to college with him and hang out and stuff alright?”

I nodded more.

“Excellent.” With that, he went right up to the door and instead of knocking… reached over and booped the doorbell. Making a feint ding.

“Biiiiing-Boooong~”

“The doorbell bucking works?! After 200 years?!” I threw my hooves up in the air. “Everything else in this wasteland is broken but her doorbell?!”

“Shhh!!” Moonstone hushed me before quickly looking back to the door, putting on his mare-slaying smile, and quickly combing a hoof through his mane.

“Just a moment!” A mare’s voice called out from within and several steps later the door opened revealing a cream-colored earth-mare. She was possibly the most in-tact ghoul I've seen yet. Most of her light brown mane and tail were still in, had both her eyes, and all of her limbs… the only thing that gave away she was a ghoul were the several missing patches of hide across her body and how she looked a bit underweight. She had a heart and a baby bottle for a cutiemark… was her talent having foals or just taking care of them? “Can I help you kids?” she asked head tilting.

Moonstone coughed and worked his magic. “Hey Mrs. Cream-Heart, I know this is kind of sudden but is Button-Mash around? We were working on our costumes for the Nightmare Night party over at Rosy’s house but the bus never showed up. So were…kinda stranded.” he smiled sheepishly and scratched the back of his mane. This was rehearsed…no stutter, no little pauses for improv, just a smooth story.

I was far more distracted by a totally unrelated but equally important thought. Being so well put together it was far easier to imagine what she looked like before. Fill in a patch here, a little more meat on her bone there, and… sweet Celestia in estrus this mare used to be hot!

“Oh it’s you Moonstone, you know it's perfectly fine to call me Button’s mom like everypony else. I mean really, you college kids barely remember the names of your professors, and yet you can remember me?”

“I know but It just doesn’t feel polite, and in my line of work they really drill that Canterlot etiquette into us.” How was he this smooth?!

“I can imagine, I still think going for royal guard was a great career choice for you. Princess Luna may have her bat pony ones but back in my day being a guard for Celestia was the dream. High pay, respect, and you couldn't keep normal ponies off you. Oh, and the royal dental plan was to die for.” she giggled a bit.

Moonstone chuckled awkwardly with her. “Yeah, just trying to keep the dream alive I guess. Even if I can’t guard the princess the Ministry of Image would certainly keep a roof over my head. Speaking of which…” he trailed off leading the conversation.

“Oh that’s right, you poor kids are stranded and were willing to let this old mare prattle on. I’m sorry to say Button-Mash isn’t home right now, I dropped him off for one of his little playdates this morning. I’d have gone to pick him up by now but my autowagon won't start.” We all looked over the rusted vehicle in the driveway. “I tried changing the oil myself but it still wouldn’t start. None of the other neighbors were home all day for me to ask either.” she sighed in defeat.

“That explains the massive oil stain…” mumbled Lucy before getting elbowed in the ribs by Moonstone who never broke character. “Ack! I..I mean… doing your own maintenance is a uhh... Good step towards self-reliance.”

“I’m not too worried, My husband said he was in line to get promoted if some invasion into Zebrica goes well. We’ll just use the money from that to get it fixed. In the meantime though there's no way the bus is still running at this hour and there's no way I’m letting you walk home. I can hear all those gunshots going off from all the hooligans downtown. Guess you’ll have to stay the night.”

“Oh but we don’t wanna impose, Won’t Buttons freak out if he learns two pretty mares stayed the night while he was gone?” He wiggled his eyebrow a little.

What’s he playing at?

“You're right.” the ghoulish mom smirked before stepping aside and holding the door open. “Girls, help an old mare teach her son a lesson about leaving his mother home alone all the time? You can sleep in his bed, I made it for him after all.”

“Uhh…sure,” I answered making my way inside behind Moonstone. The interior was about as well off as the exterior. Fresh-ish coats of paint, the furniture dust-free and still neatly arranged. The appliances while clean were as broken as the TV in the living room. This felt like a lot of space for one mare… then again I’m from a stable where a broom closet was considered an okay amount of space for me to live in.

“Great, make yourself at home. Are you kids hungry? The powers been out but I have plenty of canned goods if you can tolerate lukewarm food.”

Food? Did she say actual food?! I looked to Moonstone and he nodded back with a smile. She has actual food! I haven't been able to keep anything down in days so much crap keeps happening to me! “That would be lovely Mrs. Cream- err... Button’s mom. You wouldn't happen to have any canned tacos would you?” I asked planting my rear on the living-room couch gingerly tapping my forehooves together.

“Sorry dear, I saw the promotional stand for them at the grocery store but the price was outrageous. 200 bits for half a gallon of preservatives shaped like a waterlogged burrito, and with money as tight as it is with all the inflation and resources getting diverted to the war, the 5 cans of baked beans was a much better deal.”

My disappointment was immeasurable and my day was ruined. “I’ll try the baked beans then.”

Dinner was nice, canned food or not it was still the most I’d eaten in one sitting since leaving 83. We got to spend a few hours pretending we lived a life before the bombs, and as far as Button’s mom was concerned we were. I felt…weird lying to her like this just to get a free bed and food. At the same time though, we were making her happy, fulfilling whatever memory/fantasy/issue she had bouncing around in that ageless brain. She thought Moonstone was in training to be a royal guard, that I was an art student, and Lucy even got her to believe she graduated last semester with a bachelor's in ‘Art history’. The day’s exertions were catching up to us… The siren call of a bed to flop face first in drew me. Speaking of which…

“Against my better judgment, your friends have the guest room all to themselves, so you get the spend the night in my son’s room.” Button’s mom gestured up a 2nd flight of stairs leading to the Arctic…I mean the attic.

I raised a brow. “What do you mean against your better judgment? You seemed super on board with the idea of letting us stay the night so we could catch the bus in the morning.”

“Oh you misunderstand, it's not my better judgment about that, it's more..” she made a knowing smirk only a mother could have. “Those two just seemed like they needed some time together.” she was coy…too coy! Coy enough to reinvent the lost art of sushi!

“Alone time together?” I questioned “But they hate each other.”

“Is that what you think? Then why do they hang out together?” that smirk wasn't fading, she wasn’t telling me something and I was almost willing to kill a mare to figure it out! Not this mare obviously…yet.

“I dunno..” I shrugged. “Cause he feels like he’s responsible for her for some reason? I mean they argue ALL the time, I think being here with you is the longest I've ever seen them go without arguing.”

“Like a married couple?”

“Exactly!”

Button’s mom sighed. “Oh if only I was that age again.” she gazed off into the distance about to disappear down memory lane if I didn't interrupt.

I blinked. “What?...why? You’re immort- uhh… Looking great for your age. What are you? 28?” Deflective compliment! Nice!

How deep were this ancient mare’s smuggium stockpiles? That smirk! “You’ve never had a coltfriend have you?”

My lungs bailed out and I broke into a cough. “What?! I- no, I… that's a REALLY personal question to be asking random college kids ya’ know.” I looked around struggling to look at the mare. “I-I’ve had a colt friend…several… tons of colt friends! I’m a 12-speed village bicycle! A mare-eater I say!” I stamped a hoof, showing dominance atop my pile of verbal horseapples.

“Uh-huh, and I’m a dollar store alicorn.” that smirk bored into my soul. “You can look and touch, just don't break anything in my son’s room alright?” she started making her way back towards the stairs. “Oh and you know the phrase blind as a bat? Well, the local bat population is both blind and deaf so they crash into the walls of the house a lot. If you hear tons of thumping late into the night it's the ‘bats’.”

“She emphasized the bats for some reason… must be some real fatass bats.” I thought aloud and went up the stairs to the attic. The door opened with a long drawn-out creak befitting a horror movie, so before I could get murdered by pre-war attic clowns I pointed my pip-light inside.

Twas a long triangular room minus the more vertical wall segments that only came up to head height before tapering off. The room had a large circular window with a curtain, and the rest could best be described as a mare-lair/cave. A large bed was drawing me towards it sure, but it also had a desk, a functioning terminal, a large in-tact TV in the back, bean bag chairs, cosmic rugs, and some kind of workbench. The walls were plastered with endless posters about video games I’d heard of, others my brain said were bands, and the rest…my personal favorite…lots of scantily clad mares surrounded by letters I couldn’t read.

My pipbuck pinged and read ‘Foreign language detected. Activating subtitles: Neighponese.’

“Neighpon? Like… the war ally Neighpon? Somehow not part of the goddesses Equestria Neighpon? Ninja pony comic Neighpon?!”

“Yes,” the screen answered before closing back to the home menu.

Clearly, Button-mash was a stallion of culture. Though I don't recall reading anything about everypony in Neighpon being a mare like these posters would imply. At the bottom of my vision, little green words appeared whenever I looked at the foreign lettering. Things like. ‘BattleMare: Gundam Blitz-4.5’ or ‘Waltz of the Spring Leaves’ and one just called ‘Chlorine.’

“Huh… There's no way a mare that cute is kicking that giant robot’s ass with a skirt that short and a rainbow staff… unless it's magical… yeah is probably magical.” I scratched my chin pondering the oldest of literary solutions to all problems. ‘Magic’. “What else does this Button-Mash guy got in here?”

At the terminal desk the screen was left flashing on ‘Password:’ and and probably been the only light up here for centuries. There was only one thing to do! I reached forward and pressed the keys one at a time. “P.a.s.s.w.o.r.d….” and pressed enter.

‘Denied. You have 3 attempt(s) remaining’

“Damn it.” I squinted and yawned. “Curiosity is standing between me and finally sleeping in a real bed…Grrr..” I attempted a new password. “M….o…M…..enter!” I slapped the enter key.

‘Denied. You have 2 attempt(s) remaining’

“This… this is why I should have harassed Ice-Pick into showing me how to do this stuff. I’d have given him access to some of my premium drawings if I’d known I'd need it one day!” I groaned feeling the siren call of sleep pulling on my eyes. “Sleep…is for the weak!”

He had to have the password somewhere! Nine times out of the 10 the password or key is always in the same room as the lock. His desk was covered in folders and binders packed with browned papers curling at the edges. Skimming the contents it was all a bunch of stuff about computers, programming, and server networks. Setting those aside I went through the other items. ‘An ‘C@FF1N3’’ mug… a box of ancient tissues… empty lotion bottle.. and- The hell is this?” Nearly buried behind the terminal in papers was a small figurine. The hunk of plastic depicted a really cute unicorn with a purple/pink striped mane singing into a mic. “You look familiar….”

I squinted at the statuette and looked down at the simple black base it stood upon and read the words aloud. “Sweetie Belle…” both in bold printed letters and smaller signed print on the underside. “Holy horseapples he had a signed miniature of Saint Rarity’s sister!?” I held the figurine aloft between my forehooves, it was spotless! Neither hide nor hair showed any damage. The ravages of time had not reached the figure of one so divinely adjacent. “I so gotta show this to Dad later! This is like… the closest thing to a holy relic I've ever laid my hooves on.”

There was this nagging feeling though, clamoring over the spector of sleep trying to get to the forefront of my mind. “Oh right. This is her son’s stuff…”I brought the figurine down from on high and looked it over, marveling at its perfection. Odds were this ‘Button-Mash’ has been dead as a doornail for over two hundred years, nopony would miss it, and it would go perfectly in Dad’s chapel! One step closer to the goddesses!… but… it was her son’s figurine. She probably didn't even know it as here, I mean technically…

‘I vow to be generous…’

Twas like a whisper in my ear sending a shiver down my mane, but when I snapped to see the source nopony was there but the bed tempted me. The tiny princesses laid out like puppets with the strings cut making over exaggerated silent snores.

“You’re right creepy voice in my head… I vowed to be generous. Guess that means I can’t take this figurine unless Button’s mom says I can.” Oh, the irony this was the sister of generosity. One of the founders of Stable-Tec, she's one of the reasons I'm alive right now, she probably even designed the suit I’m wearing right now… The sister of generosity. The aspect of ‘Good intentions.’

I put her down in front of the keyboard. “I’ll at least ask first. That's the least I can do right?” I looked back at the terminal though. “S.W.E.E.T.I.E space B.E.L.L.E..enter!”

‘Denied. You have 1 attempt(s) remaining’

“Mare fucker!!” I slammed a hoof on the desk rattling the idol. Sighing vented the frustration and let myself slump. If I get the password wrong again the computer will lock up, and I refuse to repeat the terminal incident of 7th grade! Who locks a terminal intended for public education anyway?!

My gaze fell upon the bed and the specter of sleep clawed its way from my muzzle in the form of a yawn, basking in its freedom before I closed my mouth and smacked my lips. “Yep.. bedtime.” I went over to the bed and gave it the tried and true once-over. Check under the sheets, clean. Check under the mattress, nothing, not even mold. Check under the bed…just old horseshoe boxes and an ideal lack of monsters.

It was like the bed reached out to me with invisible tendrils pulling me into the sweet embrace of a mattress four times thicker than mine back home. “I have…” I yawned louder. “A score to settle with Luna. And you my fair bed.. Shall be my battleship.” I passed a hoof over the plush sheets, stood on my hinds, closed my eyes, stretched my forelegs wide, and fell forward. Flopping right into the bed and- Zzz….

Level up!
Perk unlocked: Bloody mess (rank 2)

-Ever wanted to see a pony explode into chunky salsa? Reduce a raider to Swiss cheese? Explode a ghoul into jerky? Of course, you have! Cause for some reason it just keeps happening! Have another +5% to all damage.